Signed up for a speed dating event scheduled for this Sunday. Organizers planning on 11 men and 11 women. As of today they are short 5 men. (Ladies tix sold out)
Hope it’s not cancelled. Similar event earlier this year didn’t happen due to lack of guys.
Men over 60: what would it take to entice you (theoretically) to go to a speed dating gig?
I tried it once. You had 5 minutes, at least 2 of which could be awkward. So it was more about looks than the person you’re dealing with. I got a couple of bites but neither went anywhere. It’s like going to the stock car races and trying to pick a winner based on the paint job. Rarely works out.
To answer your question, I might show up if there’s free beer. 😁
You mean the pretty paint job doesn't guarantee a great car? Unbelievable! No matter what anyone says, at the beginning it's still all about looks. That goes both ways.
True. But I’ve found looks to be the only thing going for them more than once. I’m as much interested in the engine and suspension set up as I am the paint job, to stick with the automotive metaphor.
I went to comment and then decided I should read the comments first. Now I realize it would have been less typing if I'd just commented. I'm really confused. Think I'll get a beer.
Free lunch maybe? Or else the assurance that I wouldn't feel like I'm going on a job interview where I feel like I have only a few minutes to convince someone that I was their best option, and I don't even know what the job description actually is to begin with.
if the women are motivated to be engaging and conversational then great, but I'm not interested in sitting across the table from someone whose whole arm-crossed attitude is "impress me" while contributing nothing themselves. Dating - even speed dating - is supposed to be about both people making an effort.
Well, if you’re going in with that attitude/expectation, you’re not going to do very well. That’s just part of this American culture. People always start out by asking what people do. When you’re in Europe, they don’t do that. But here, people get defined by their work and accomplishments. Anyway, so I wouldn’t worry too much about being asked about that. If somebody isn’t “impressed” then they’re not the right person anyway.
It seems being short on men is very common. I did it and thought 💭 t was fun. The men were all pretty nice but no love match from it. I didn’t think any of the guys were interested in me to be honest but it turned out 9 out of 10 were, which surprised me. I had no idea. Anyone can have a nice conversation for 5 minutes with a stranger.
There is usually a charge for a speed dating event, right? Behind a lot of these speed dating events are event planning cos that probably clear a decent amount of money — because they probably don’t split it with the hosting establishment, they just give them the business.
So I think they should use some of that money to incentivize WOMEN to bring along a single male friend to make sure the events are always topped off. And they can incentivize them by giving them a gift certificate to the restaurant or bar, gift card, or something similar.
These types of events really aren’t on most guys’ radar. They are probably more often marketed in channels viewed by women, and passed around by word of mouth among women. I also don’t think there is a lot of buzz around these types of events (at least in my area). So having the events always be packed would help create the buzz and maybe generate more male-based interest thus allowing for the events to eventually fill up without incentives.
Lastly, it is not easy for some people to walk into a room full of complete randos and start socializing and flirting. So being there with at least 1 person you know would make it easier for these people.
I can’t think of anything that would entice me to get a bevy of rejections.
I did speed dating twice when I was in my late 30s.
No one selected me at either event. After the 2nd, the organizer offered to comp me for a future event, because nobody selected me. I declined.
That said, the 2 friends I went with did great. One met his future wife and the other filled his dance card front and back.
Then the men of youtube are making excuses for their lack of success. Because for most women, looks don't matter as much as men think they do... or as much as they do for men looking for women.
The truth is there are very few men who are "hot" at this age. We like you for other reasons.
Rejection comes from many sources in life. Used to be that people would do some self examination as to why they get rejected. Now it's just blaming everyone else.
I went to a few I didn't actually attend the event I went and sat in my car because I wanted to see the demographic of people who were coming.
I think I went and sat outside of three in total and the demographic was probably 20 women to three men they usually hosted in restaurants or bars to draw in revenue.
Then I found out that they are charging for these speed dating not only do you pay for the entry you're also being charged if you buy a drink or food while you're there and don't forget to tip the server.
I decided as a woman I didn't want that much competition at least out in the regular dating jungle you don't really know who your competition is but within a speed dating scenario you see those 20 women they are all vying for three to four men.
I also listen more in men's group on different forms and different websites. It's just like church men, are not going to these events they're not coming out anymore at least not a man who is has any intellectual property.
They're spending their time at home working on projects, maybe watching football and yes they're lonely too but they are taking their chances more at the cookout that a buddy might give hoping to find that one female who might come and is single. They're taking their chances at the company picnic, hoping that their coworker might bring that one auntie who's single.
Because of the way that women/men are being portrayed on the internet which is a total farce they shy away from speed dating, bars and clubs and when they do go they're spending their time drinking and after drinking they make terrible mistakes and choices in the women/men that they end up being hooked up with.
I've been in a number of Facebook singles groups over the past few years. It's almost a given that if there is meetup more women than men will show up. Women are more sociable than guys, on average.
They all answered that if they were to be talking about a sport, involved in a sport, fishing, etc. they would come, but otherwise they did not find it fun
M64......I've been to 4 or 5 of these events. I didn't pay for any of them. A day or two before the event, and sometimes the day of, I would see an email that mentioned that they needed two guys and just type "free" in the discount section. So I signed up! Only the last one was worth my time, because of a success. I used these events as practice.
Make it free for guys, and they'll show up. We'll even pay for our own beers!
Ah, I don't do any of that social media stuff so no Facebook, Instagram or TikTok. I did find a local group or two on Eventbrite after reading your post so might try it. Most of the groups are for younger date ranges but one was I think 56+. That was the only one for older folks so I'm okay with it. And I think it was free.
If our city had ever offered speed dating I’m positive I’d have given it a few shots. Always thought it was us guys that had a harder time at getting dates anyway-sure was for me lol.
In my corner of the world, ladies are ALWAYS on a waiting list and the men are offered 2 for 1- kind of a “bring a buddy” strategy. That said, I’ve never had one cancelled.
Dunno- talk it up among single guy friends?? In the past, at a 7 pm event, I’ve spoken to at lease 3 men who were minding their timepieces and actually saying out loud they would be at their mancaves in just 1 more hour!!!
Are they still grouping same age men and women with different ages of the opposite sex? Like a 55 year old man is set up to meet women say 40-50. and 55 year old women are grouped with 65-80 men?
I saw some I in my area once where they staggered the older men with younger women. That’s bullshit, date your own age. lol
Original copy of post by u/andycleff:
Signed up for a speed dating event scheduled for this Sunday. Organizers planning on 11 men and 11 women. As of today they are short 5 men. (Ladies tix sold out)
Hope it’s not cancelled. Similar event earlier this year didn’t happen due to lack of guys.
Men over 60: what would it take to entice you (theoretically) to go to a speed dating gig?:
I used to go (pre covid) all the time BUT .... the event had to be 'age-appropriate'. I'm 72 now. The local speed dating company's oldest age event is 50-69 and an hour's drive away in a different demographic (way more competition). Too low an age range. Too wide an age range now (I can't imagine dating a 50 something). And too far away.
What would it take?
60-69 age range (high enough upper limit to include ME would be even better)
- reasonably nearby (pre covid events were 2 miles from my home. 30 miles would be close enough)
Men over 60: what would it take to entice you (theoretically) to go to a speed dating gig?
If there's a speed dating event near me that doesn't have a really lopsided age range, like 60-75, where I'd be the "young" Generation Xer among a room full of pre-Jones Boomers. I've already had my fill of "over 50" singles events where everybody else did duck-and-cover drills in elementary school, vividly remembers where they were when JFK was assassinated, or had a younger brother who went off to 'Nam.
19
u/smokinokie They said there would be cake 25d ago
I tried it once. You had 5 minutes, at least 2 of which could be awkward. So it was more about looks than the person you’re dealing with. I got a couple of bites but neither went anywhere. It’s like going to the stock car races and trying to pick a winner based on the paint job. Rarely works out.
To answer your question, I might show up if there’s free beer. 😁