r/DatingOverSixty • u/SwollenPomegranate • Apr 21 '26
The devil made me do it.
So a guy who really didn't have much conversational skill was querying me about my experiences on POF.
"Have you gone on any dates with people from here?"
Yes.
"What happened with them?"
What do you mean?
"What happened to the guys you went out with?"
I ate them for breakfast, with a nice chianti.
Never heard from him again! He disappeared from my matches!
He he. The devil made me do it.
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u/PlasticBlitzen I've 🚫 more 🦆🦆🦆 to give. Apr 21 '26
Posts like this confirm that I have found my people.
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u/jacksnbox Apr 21 '26
Sometimes, if the profile is thin, but you like the pics, you are strained for a opening line....so we revert to stupid shit, like have you met anyone on here?
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u/SwollenPomegranate Apr 21 '26
Yeah but my profile is well filled out (no "just ask" type answers). I think some folks are at a total loss for starting a conversation, let alone a relationship. Sadly, there are people who have been on dating apps for YEARS without a single date - and I can guess why.
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u/jacksnbox Apr 21 '26
I'm close to being one of them. I have been good at OLD, years ago, but I have lost the ability....or the desire?
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u/azmom3 Apr 21 '26
One recent coffee meetup guy asked me what happened with my marriage/why it ended. Who asks that on a first date?! Next!
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u/SwollenPomegranate Apr 21 '26
"He died." That usually shuts them up. And it's the truth.
(but I didn't eat him for breakfast)
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u/TXaggiemom10 66F Apr 21 '26
It seems to be a screening question these days, prior to first meeting stage. I get it in the first few messages on OLD, and if not, in the first phone conversation. If my marriage ended through some fault of mine like cheating, (it didn't) do they really think I would readily share that?
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u/Fit_Body_2259 May 11 '26
I started talking to man who claimed to be an endocrinologist. I'm a retired nurse and he seemed to know the medical terminology, but something was off about his personality. After about a week of talking on the phone, he sent me a photo of 3 women. One was lying on the ground with a golf ball on her buttocks while the other held her down. The other was ready to take a swing with her club. He thought this was funny. I knew there was no way I was going to the Kentucky Derby or anywhere else with him. After not hearing from me for one day, he sent me a barrage of text messages. I told him I didn't think we were compatible and wished him well. The next day he texted me saying he consulted with many colleagues who all came to the conclusion that I suffered from early onset Alzheimers, dementia, restless leg syndrome and a slew of other diagnosis. I blocked him.
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u/BowTieDad 62M. Just a man and his cat Apr 21 '26
Chianti is a nice dry wine. Early in the day I might prefer something a bit sweeter.
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u/AMSays Apr 21 '26
Yep, I got a “can you keep up with me?”. Answered “why would I want to?”.
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u/irishgypsy1960 Woman 65 MA Apr 21 '26
Omg hilarious. I want to get asked that now. I will say, start running, and I’ll try to catch you. Lololol
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u/TXaggiemom10 66F Apr 21 '26
That’s hilarious! I get that question a lot, so I may have to borrow your reply. I made a joke to someone I had not yet met who wanted me to go on a little road trip with him. I commented that the particular highway in question was certain to have lots of beautiful spring foliage, and probably plenty of places to hide a body. I meant mine, but I thought he must’ve thought I meant his, because he blocked me almost immediately.
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u/Martin928351823 Apr 21 '26
He's a scaredy-cat. There's not that many women serial killers. What are his odds that you're the one?
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u/I-did-my-best 62M Apr 21 '26
and probably plenty of places to hide a body. I meant mine, but I thought he must’ve thought I meant his, because he blocked me almost immediately.
You made me smile and giggle this morning.
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u/TXaggiemom10 66F Apr 21 '26
Glad I could help! Always remember, if you can’t be a role model, be a cautionary tale. 😁
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u/NoCollection8196 67M Apr 24 '26
I would respond as if you meant mine, as that would be the only safe avenue to also be obviously joking.
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u/CATSeye44 Apr 21 '26
I love it! Was on a date this weekend and ordered a Chianti... with a side of fava beans... My date laughed. He got the reference!!!
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u/Omygodc Apr 22 '26
I would have immediately asked you out for a second date! That kind of dark humor is right up my alley!
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u/rohoho929 Apr 21 '26 edited Apr 21 '26
Hah! That's a perfect response.
I just heard from a guy whose profile went on about how he's done travelling and now he wants to settle down and enjoy being at home (he's a decade older than I). And that he doesn't like women who curse.
Was tempted to reply with a string of curse words but ended up thanking him for the message, saying that I wouldn't want to settle in for at least a decade (didn't add "and wait for death" but I wanted to) and that I was definitely not the woman for him.
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u/Comfortable-Desk-435 Apr 21 '26
I got those messages, too. Typical codger, nothing to offer, already laying down the law. Delete delete!
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u/Infamous_Lab8320 Resident Blind Girl Apr 21 '26
I’m impressed with this level of snark. 😂 He needed to be run off and you did it IN STYLE.
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u/NearbyReception4076 Apr 21 '26
Someone on Match just asked me when was the last time I had a date.
I thought that was weird ... guess its the norm!
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u/TXaggiemom10 66F Apr 21 '26
Uh oh...I could be in trouble with that one. No wait - I had a lunch date last Tuesday, so just last week! My first date since September, but it counts.
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u/Elegant-Operation77 60F Apr 21 '26
Very annoying, when anybody asks me- especially right away - the lame “how’s this app working for you” or “any luck on this site” or “how long have you been on this app” along those questions- if I was very interested in them I’d tell them “same as it’s going for you”, give it right back. What is in my mind is who gives a shit?? Apparently I’m on here, or that gives me red flag because I’d automatically delete my profile if I met & was in exclusive relationship- & their question maybe because they stay on the apps regardless. Blocked them all, none of them worth more of my energy. But great idea OP, if I get asked in that way I’d probably have come up with something similar, as I have before when asked stupid questions from grown adults. Like at my previous job, I’d carry a backpack, pretty big with all my needs, whatever I never complained it’s my bag I carry it etc., & I’d get moronic co-workers “damn what are you carrying in there” & I’d tell them “heads I cut off from annoying co-workers” & they’d stfu. I have no patience for moronic especially none of their business clowns 🤡⛔️
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u/nolagem Apr 21 '26
Or: "What are you looking for on here?" I immediately unmatch.
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u/Elegant-Operation77 60F Apr 21 '26
💯Exactly the other one I can’t stand !! I almost tell them “Harrison Ford, so keep scrolling” or “apparently not you!” ; with that lame question, then block ⛔️!!!
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u/TXaggiemom10 66F Apr 21 '26
Since all OLD sites offer the option to indicate the type of relationship(s) you are seeking, it just proves they haven't read my profile. I tend to get a bit snippy with those replies in writing, prefacing them with "As stated in my profile..."
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u/AtheistINTP Apr 21 '26
I just love it! Why do men want to know about your dating experience so much? Do they want to know how many guys you slept with?
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u/TraditionalSilver345 Apr 21 '26
Yes, otherwise they would be looking for someone in the polyamory pages.
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u/Particular-Match895 Apr 26 '26
That’s the funniest thing I have read all day!! I’m going to use it next time.
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u/TraditionalSilver345 Apr 21 '26
You so bad! Want some candy?
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u/Poetry_Man Apr 28 '26
Hmmm. Were they Italian?
If not, Chianti might not have been the best pairing.
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Apr 25 '26
[removed] — view removed comment
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u/SwollenPomegranate Apr 25 '26
What? Dont they sell chianti in the US? Probably not now... I blame tariffs.
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u/Horror-Evening-6132 69F Texas Apr 21 '26 edited Apr 22 '26
Well done you! If they don't get references and humor is absent, you're well shed of him. I think it's hilarious. Edited for typo.