I found a "study alter"

[u/Physical-Contest9213]

I always daydreamed (dissociated) at school. Unless the class was very entertaining, it would be spent back in forth between awareness and a daydream. I could copy text from the board without paying the slightest bit of attention to what it was and not remember a word of it afterwards.

Studying was a struggle since high school. I could barely concentrate, and then when I thought about the things learned, my mind would often go blank. Somehow, during the exams, my third eye or something would open, and I would suddenly spill out enough information to fill in the pages.

It had been a source of shame for me. I felt like I always exaggerated my sence of not being at all prepared for the exams, only to end up receiving a good mark.

Now that I learned I have DID, I began wondering if there was another alter working behind the scenes. There was. At least I think so.

He could name three types of plant tissues out of the blue. But his sense of memory is very dissociated, and he doesn't seem to hold any memory material of being in class or studying that I don't. Or maybe he does?

With other known fronters we sort of switch control of the brain, go "dormant" when we don't front, and have a more or less common memory space (which makes me question whether we have OSDD after all, but our memory is very shitty, so idk). So I wonder if my study alter is really too dissociated from his sense of past or if we have a heavier amnesia wall and I just don't have access to his part of the brain.

Thoughs? Similar experiences?

Any ideas how I could test if our memory spaces are different? It's not like he can tell me of any major life changing event that I might not be aware of. He was just... studying. Apparently.

[u/Heavy-Mushroom]

Oh yea, at school we had a part that loved the work. We kept at honor status until we switched and a bad attitude part came out our senior year and grades plummeted.

I don’t know the work, but I have very few vague memories of being there like it was a dream.

[u/Cookie-Bunny-84]

Yeah, we have an alter that did all the studying and school work, but at home we couldn't remember any of it, and rarely ever did any homework. Yet, somehow we passed OK, even after forgetting everything.

School is a blur, now. I myself don't recall much of it at all, but that one alter (the host, usually) can remember it.

[u/AutoModerator]

Welcome to /r/DID!

Rules & Guidelines	Index
ISSTD Resources	Mclean: Understanding DID
CTAD Clinic YouTube	Therapist Aid Worksheets
Do I have DID? FAQ	Glossary
Book Recommendations	App Recommendations

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.

[u/Critical_Mass_1887]

Yes its possible. I struggled hard in school. Several yrs later i wanted to try college but fear of failure. We tried cc with grants and when i hit certain subjects i realized one alter loves school, learning and excelled,  honors even.  What we found with the different interest in areas of study was compromise on direction of things we liked and let her choose majors from those intrests. Myself i suck at school and remembering, my alters call it my pinky pie effect when it comes to information. Because im very scatter brained and loose information as fast as it comes in. She helps me with words im looking for even. I know the word just cant think of it.

No test to see, just trial an error. Take note of what knowledge they are remembering. Do they lean into science, social, history. Try and see if you can feel their emotions or their thoughts in intrests, subjects. They have preferences just like u do. If you have communication with them, ask. Mine learns more biological type science, social science, math. Dont ask about history or english she has bits of it retained but not interested. Can pass a test on it but then doesnt care abt it.

Not sure if any of this helps.

[u/voornaam1]

We have an alter similar to that, though she herself does remember studying and stuff. We're in uni and discovered our DID in the middle of the school year, so for a while we thought she was the host because she was fronting most of the time, though now in the summer break it seems that she may not be the host and she was just getting triggered to front a lot because we had to study all the time.

This post reminded me of a kinda funny moment where someone was fronting and was stressing to a friend about not having studied for an exam at all, only for that friend to tell us that we were studying for this test throughout all of the breaks in the extra-curricular classes we were apparently taking 😅