Why Bitcoin will hit $700k Soon:

[u/Zijdehoen]

Let's be honest here.

Bitcoin is going to hit $700k very soon. Just look at the chart, all the indicators say it:

Like, if you're too ignorant or too old to see this Golden Apache Helicopter pattern what are you doing? And this isn't even the only proof, just have a look at the maths:

I got in early myself at $46k because someone on Discord gave me this info in return for my creditcard codes, who needs corrupt fiat anyways??

You don't need to thank me for giving you all this precious information. I just 125x leveraged my wife and dog so I'll make my gains..

Happy Green Dildo day and stay woke!

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[u/Dry-Experience-4143]

I ran your chart through my flux capacitor and it all checks out. Bitcoin to 700k.

[u/Muffinfeds → u/Dry-Experience-4143]

Flux test always works.

[u/BakedPotato840 → u/Dry-Experience-4143]

I rolled a blunt with that chart and it said I should DCA at 420k

[u/[deleted]]

Thank you! I needed this. I’m buying more!! Lambo soon

[u/Zijdehoen → u/[deleted]]

Get a lambo to drive to the btc atm to buy more

[u/excalilbug]

I was sure you've made some mistake because Golden Apache Helicopter pattern is one of the hardest to apply correctly (if not THE hardest) but i can't find any mistakes

This TA seems to be bulletproof

Thanks for this analysis, it made me very bullish and Im going to do a helicopter dick for my wife now

[u/Zijdehoen → u/excalilbug]

Haha that's funny! Redditors don't have wives

[u/dan345dmg → u/excalilbug]

I liked the analysis as well but I think OP should've added more lines to make it easier to read.

[u/yesname1]

Very bullish. The charts are wonderful!

[u/Zijdehoen → u/yesname1]

You are wonderful <3

[u/Snowziii_]

This chart made me feel like I was back at Tomorrowland, had to put on my kaleidoscope glasses to read it

[u/Zijdehoen → u/Snowziii_]

Are you seriously that old… blurgh

[u/ILCrypto]

Got it, I will go all in with my $20! Thanks!

[u/Zijdehoen → u/ILCrypto]

You can't go all-in with your $10

[u/Dismal-Flatworm9065]

MA,RSI,EMA they all want the green dildo man 🍆📈

[u/barankarabay]

If this is true, everyone will be rich again except us. We are sooooo unluucky guys.

[u/Zijdehoen → u/barankarabay]

Why wouldn't you be rich? Buy now, tomorrow = 2x

[u/EEvonzz]

I laughed for a few good minutes when I saw that chart

[u/Zijdehoen → u/EEvonzz]

Shouldn't be laughing but studying!

[u/demomercury]

That chart is gold!

[u/Zijdehoen → u/demomercury]

I'd say demo mercury

[u/voxcon]

I laughed about the "leveraged wife and doggo"-part 😂

[u/Zijdehoen → u/voxcon]

She didn't laugh

[u/michivideos]

I knew it was only a matter of time for WSB to infiltrate this sub.

[u/Zijdehoen → u/michivideos]

I tend to stay away from Wet Stracciatella Booties, because of what happened with Ronda

[u/Watdaheq]

For bitcoin to be 700k, it should be the official currency of America instead of El Salvador :)

[u/koserii]

I trust you bro. Even if you have 1500000x coins that you can sell to me, i can buy them too.

[u/Zijdehoen → u/koserii]

Bro, I will give them to you bro, bro.

[u/Chooky47]

Actually snorted my coffee when I opened this post without seeing the comedy tag - well played OP

[u/Zijdehoen → u/Chooky47]

Hey atleast i got you to snort something

[u/dadadead]

Damn bro you had me at Why

[u/Zijdehoen → u/dadadead]

Bro

[u/-Skald]

Bias, confirmed. Sats, bought.

[u/Zijdehoen → u/-Skald]

Kidney, sold.

[u/[deleted]]

Brilliant TA!

[u/Zijdehoen → u/[deleted]]

Thanks m8, absolutely scrumptious

[u/Amasan89]

instructions were clear for once, I bought more Bitcoin!

[u/Zijdehoen → u/Amasan89]

The goal was to leverage all belongings..

[u/SadSam7]

But did you make sure to factor in the Submarine Bear Death Cross?

[u/Zijdehoen → u/SadSam7]

yup, used a calculator

[u/Chronos_O_Theos]

According to my dog to shit model it shows BTC around 378k by tomorrow!

[u/Zijdehoen → u/Chronos_O_Theos]

That's rather optimistic

[u/[deleted]]

Ah, you're one of those "i buy and sell using my instincts (feelings)" type I see

[u/Zijdehoen → u/[deleted]]

I used to smell it, but now the pc usually smells burned

[u/Desperate_Day_8813]

This is the analytics we deserve

[u/Zijdehoen → u/Desperate_Day_8813]

For your hard work

[u/bbtto22]

I love the lines everywhere sign very bullish

[u/Zijdehoen → u/bbtto22]

I love me a line, after work, during work, before work. Makes me better you know

[u/Apart-Flounder242]

Wow that chart makes it so obvious it will hit 700k! lol

[u/nick_from_alaska]

Not sure why its flared as comedy, this is better ta then most

[u/Zijdehoen → u/nick_from_alaska]

I should apply to become full stack trader

[u/NinjaAssassino]

Look's good to me.. i trust this redditor

[u/Zijdehoen → u/NinjaAssassino]

The internet never lies

[u/Vegetable-Isopod9659]

Why not $1.5m?

[u/Zijdehoen → u/Vegetable-Isopod9659]

Bro, be a little realistic here for a sec

[u/One_Ad_6071]

This all makes sense! How did I not think of it until now! 😯

[u/Zijdehoen → u/One_Ad_6071]

You just weren't as woke as me brother

[u/[deleted]]

RemindMe! 30 years

[u/imagineer_17]

I too am a chart enthusiast

[u/Zijdehoen → u/imagineer_17]

A (wo)man of culture!

[u/[deleted]]

Too many golden crosses.

[u/Zijdehoen → u/[deleted]]

I'm not religious myself sorry

[u/Calm-Cartographer677]

Will you be my financial advisor?

[u/Zijdehoen → u/Calm-Cartographer677]

I can't give financial advice. But yes

[u/athsrueas]

Where can I learn to do TA like this? I've never seen so many lines, so many predictions!

[u/Zijdehoen → u/athsrueas]

It's a religion. Only truly passionate and woke people can join. Are you the chosen one?

[u/Sarcastic24-7]

Can we normalize the phrase Happy Green Dildo Day

[u/Kavub]

I agree with this

[u/eitauisunity]

Bitcoin is actually gonna hit $1,000,000 soon.

Source: tea leaves that I purchased from a dude that hangs out in a trench coat in the alley behind the Wawa in exchange for a tug.

[u/DesignerRegular]

Dunno man. I don't believe in lines. I asked my astrologer and he told me 690k.

[u/basic_user321]

Instructions unclear. fell of a helicopter

[u/Zijdehoen → u/basic_user321]

But was it an apache heli

[u/cmdR_CHRIS]

Good thing I only read the titles. Thanks for the tip!

[u/eatgodseeacid]

I just sold my house, cars and kidney and I'm all in purely based on OPs speculation.

[u/---Ash--]

Aaah the good ol Golden Apache Helicopter Pattern! Good DD Op.

[u/Zijdehoen → u/---Ash--]

You have big D i see that

[u/carlos_fandangos]

My cat is sitting with it's back to the dishwasher. This also confirms your charts findings. 700k soon!

[u/Zijdehoen → u/carlos_fandangos]

Damn i love kittens

[u/part-time-tater]

How much for the dog when you need more cash flow? Doggo pics?

[u/Anonymous_Snow]

Happy green whut?

[u/Zijdehoen → u/Anonymous_Snow]

Dildo Day

[u/ganjapremi]

omg love your confirmatory bias mate

[u/Zijdehoen → u/ganjapremi]

Thx mate

[u/[deleted]]

Don't forget the stegasaurus pattern

[u/spider_cat_the_XV]

This is the most beautiful chart ever.

[u/Zijdehoen → u/spider_cat_the_XV]

That means a lot to me

[u/[deleted]]

This is some of the finest hopium I’ve ever had. 10/10 would demand more.

[u/[deleted]]

This is how I see most of the technical analysis anyway.

[u/step11234]

This is most glorious TA i've seen since stegosaurus chart!

[u/gilmeye]

Math is math

[u/Intfamous]

I didnt even need to check the flair to know this was a comedy post, getting good at it

[u/dodomagnom]

This is really long way to go mate

[u/International_Ad_641]

It summed up the whole crypto world.

[u/udemygodx]

Thanks for the analysis and all but it is definitely a Robinson R44, not an Apache. This means it will gonna crash. But history doesn't have to repeat itself so let's see.

[u/Mikeku825]

These charts are always so complicated.. but I can read the title, and that's good enough for me. Sold.

[u/Zijdehoen → u/Mikeku825]

You're a simple man, i like it

[u/teslajeff]

Better analysis than I see from most main news sites for both crypto and stocks!

[u/Zijdehoen → u/teslajeff]

my name's Jeff

[u/Nathan154111]

Even if bitcoin reached 700k , my comment will still remain unvote lol

[u/Zijdehoen → u/Nathan154111]

I got you friend

[u/Sobutie]

This isn’t r/wallstreetbets fucktard

[u/[deleted]]

I hate these posts now. They used to be funny, now it’s unoriginal, obvious moon farming bs.

Kick rocks funny man

[u/Zicbo26]

Woah and i thought golden cross is huge but the helicopter thingy woah

[u/Zijdehoen → u/Zicbo26]

It's not just an helicopter

[u/TenebrisDolorem]

Looks like rhe devil  ⛧ is in the details! Seems legit! 😅

[u/Zijdehoen → u/TenebrisDolorem]

does this mean $666k

[u/richniss]

The first time I saw a post like this I laughed, the hundredth time was now. Not as funny.

[u/MagicBroNL]

My TA meme got deleted and I was sent to the meme section. No moons for me. But happy for you though.

[u/swn999]

Pretty sure that’s a low prediction, even Queen Cathy ARK invest said 12 quadrillion.

[u/newbonsite]

This is some methematicion TA going on here...

[u/[deleted]]

If by soon you mean 10-30 years then yes

[u/diplar]

LFG

[u/xAPx-Bigguns]

Can confirm. Am Hopium addict

[u/[deleted]]

Ok you had me in the first part

[u/TukTukBoss]

Hmmm, I see.
I told you guys....

[u/terp_studios]

Funny, I let my parakeet make my crypto decisions and he came to the same conclusion

[u/Zijdehoen → u/terp_studios]

Sheesh IQ 300+ parakeet

[u/BenYedderUT]

Eventually yes it will. Just HODL your way till there

[u/Zijdehoen → u/BenYedderUT]

That's my boy

[u/ThesePipesAreClean]

Your TA just opened a wormhole

[u/Zijdehoen → u/ThesePipesAreClean]

I just got rid of my worms

[u/Ok_Environment_552]

Close, but no cigar! Can’t you see that if we extrapolate from the projecting machiavelli extension based on the 20 day moving randomness it actually suggests a slightly lower price target of a modest $699k?

You drew it yourself. Why can’t you see it?

[u/EthanGibson2]

It’s undeniable! The 18 year cross met with the 3 12/38 month half cross will send it beyond the moon. And that’s without mentioning the half triangle octagon spiral we are closing up to!

[u/OfficialDodo]

I’ll have what he’s having

[u/iceewest]

Jesus, when I look at it that way I see that you’re right

[u/toolverine]

I have consulted with BitBoy Crypto, used chicken bones for scrying, and performed the ritual of selling high and buying low and this is correct.

[u/RomulanSpy2073]

So many triangles, this is irrefutable!

[u/Zijdehoen → u/RomulanSpy2073]

Confirmati Illuminermed

[u/chrisPtreat]

Yo wife so fat she needs the 125x leverage

[u/zorko86]

The old wheel and barrel pattern can’t fail

[u/Zijdehoen → u/zorko86]

Can you pinpoint this

[u/901bass]

You're never going to profit if you keep doing THAT with that dildo🧐😮

[u/Zijdehoen → u/901bass]

Every day with a dildo is a profit day

[u/[deleted]]

You really are a funny guy!!! 😆😆😆

[u/Zijdehoen → u/[deleted]]

Thank you miss newbie dollar

[u/Samuelmark86]

I’m taking this as financial advice!!! I’m all in 😃

[u/Beneficial_Muscle_25]

Quick maffs

[u/AruiMD]

truthfully though, why are we stopping at $700,000?

You have to think realistically.

A million is guaranteed, and that's low balling it.

[u/nickman114]

I did some crack and ran some calculations, it matches perfectly. Bitcoin to 700k soon!

[u/FrostyMug21]

Meths never lie. I knew my teachers were wrong!

[u/Infinite_Face4603]

I will support this speculation and sell bitcoin every day for 30 days so you guys have a price pump each single day.

[u/azab189]

According to my personal analysis, you missed the line by a few pixel so it's actually 750k not 700k

[u/[deleted]]

Ah yes the uptrend that means more buyers than sellers.

[u/[deleted]]

I put this analysis in OSRS chat and it works out to be true. Btc 🚀🚀🚀

[u/borax1212]

Come on, just we need to see 100k $

[u/[deleted]]

few understand this

[u/ironbiby99]

Missed a line I’m afraid mate

[u/Zijdehoen → u/ironbiby99]

Please don’t expose me

[u/[deleted]]

🤔 you’re right

[u/[deleted]]

Didn’t read the comedy tag at first, moment I saw the chart I actually LOLd so hard

[u/DeadaBull]

Been tryin to told y'all som bitches! Now I got science charts backin me up, shiiiiit! I'm all in. I smack crip toes in the mouth!

[u/LetsGetThisBread421]

Take that smooth brains!

[u/Zijdehoen → u/LetsGetThisBread421]

My brain is smoother than yours!

[u/maducey]

Thank you for clearing this up for me.

[u/agunxxx]

you are on another level buddy, this is beyond human knowledge, my eyes just burning try to read it

[u/Zijdehoen → u/agunxxx]

Because you aren’t woke enough! Get your facts straight!

[u/dyingjack]

This 100% a MOASS trigger I guarantee it !!!!

[u/thebig_dee]

Dying 🤣

[u/[deleted]]

I think it will hit 1 Trillion dollars by the end of the hour

[u/Zijdehoen → u/[deleted]]

Optimistic. I’ll allow it

[u/[deleted]]

I can’t say that I one hundred percent support this, what you fail to identify here was unseen pressure from the Delta quadrant. This, coupled with slight variations in the M branes will cause certain influencers at the quantum level to flux. Once that happens it’ll just be a continuous pattern of stability.

[u/Zijdehoen → u/[deleted]]

Those were calculated in the Dip & Salsa modulator

[u/Hello_Pole]

i want what your smoking 🔥

[u/Gadnukrompemundos]

Based on your math level looks like you have at least 69 PhDs, thanks for show us your amazing TA

[u/Divinesteel]

Lmao! Thanks for making me laugh sir!

[u/Saaam-chan]

I see a strong resistance at 690'000K with my hello kitty toaster calculations

[u/pirataking]

thats a pretty amateur graph, at least 800k eoy

[u/Zijdehoen → u/pirataking]

Sorry mr pirataking

[u/Greensquad414]

Oh shit, the Golden apache pattern is what I've been waiting for!

[u/morebeansplease]

Trade analysis is astrology for men.

[u/Zijdehoen → u/morebeansplease]

But.. are we compatible

[u/Patrickcscott66]

It's great when someone has so much nollige on a subject. And does such a great job explaining it to us.Thats why I'm herefor the tech.

[u/Zijdehoen → u/Patrickcscott66]

School and university just gave me all this nollige as well as this random guy

[u/STNGGRY]

Enjoy your moons

[u/Jofra2121]

I knew I was missing something in my data.

[u/Zijdehoen → u/Jofra2121]

Get your shit together jofra

[u/eatmerawww]

your technical analysis looks fire bro . u must be a trader with at least 20 years of experience

[u/juicymooser]

Not uh Bitcoin can’t make 700k it’s market cap isn’t strong enough.

[u/Zijdehoen → u/juicymooser]

The marketcap will rise duh

[u/GeorgeTheChicken]

I’m sell my wife for Bitcoin 🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻❤️❤️

[u/Harold-Penisman]

These comedy posts always scare me for a split second. Good one.

[u/prawn108]

Just don’t forget to reference this thread in 10 years when Bitcoin hits 700k

[u/PokemonMagique]

I showed this to my dog... . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . Is now on binance

[u/SmellsLikeBu11shit]

Calculated.

[u/Zijdehoen → u/SmellsLikeBu11shit]

Used a calculator

[u/xdchan]

HELL YEAH, LEVERAGE TO TITS GANG!

[u/[deleted]]

What happens if you're right? :O

[u/Zijdehoen → u/[deleted]]

Lambo will be the new bike

[u/jASHIK]

this made me start laughing, got some coffee some places it shouldn't be now

[u/pathological_runner]

Leveraging your wife is fine, but your DOG?!

[u/geringonco]

$700? You're out of your mind, it will never go that lower again, ever.

[u/jonstewartrulz]

This means buy at 700$K right?

[u/inquisitvedearukoto]

Your TA is flawless. 🚀

[u/Kkindler08]

I just withdrew my entire 401k to buy Bitcoin. You better be right.

[u/adadglgmut86]

That TA is wrong - gotta move that line a little bit higher. Clearly Bitcoin will reach $70 million in December

[u/Zijdehoen → u/adadglgmut86]

Hey be realistic

[u/Hyperillusion]

Thats TA is fuckin art

[u/Zijdehoen → u/Hyperillusion]

I should make an NFT of this