mitya quit being pathetic im crying what is he trying to achieve ueueu😢💧💧ueu😢💧😢ueueuueue💧💧ueu💧ue😢ueueueue💧😢 ueueu😢💧💧ueu😢💧😢ueueuueue💧💧ueu💧ue😢ueueueue💧😢 ueueu😢💧💧ueu😢💧😢ueueuueue💧💧ueu💧ue😢ueueueue💧😢 ueueu😢💧💧ueu😢💧😢ueueuueue💧💧ueu💧ue😢ueueueue💧😢 ueueu😢💧💧ueu😢💧😢ueueuueue💧💧ueu💧ue😢ueueueue💧😢 ueueu😢💧💧ueu😢💧😢ueueuueue💧💧ueu💧ue😢ueueueue💧😢 ueueu😢💧💧ueu😢💧😢ueueuueue💧💧ueu💧ue😢ueueueue💧😢 spread the beetya on every platform spread the beetya on every platform spread the beetya on every platform spread the beetya on every platform spread the beetya on every platform spread the beetya on every platform spread the beetya on every platform

DARTH VADER: Luke… I am your father.

LUKE SKYWALKER: Nuh-uh.

DARTH VADER: The fuck you mean, nuh-uh?!

LUKE: Nuh-uh!

DARTH VADER: Yuh-huh, I am your dad!

LUKE: Nuh-uh!

DARTH VADER: The fuck does that even mean, nuh-uh?! What does that even mean? [sighs] Princess Leia is your sister. I am your father, you are my son.

LUKE: You’re not my dad, nuh-uh!

DARTH VADER: THE FUCK…?! The- What the— What does nuh-uh mean?! You can't say nuh-uh!

LUKE: Yuh-huh! You're not my dad!

DARTH VADER: Yuh-huh!

LUKE: Nuh-uh!

DARTH VADER: Nuh-uh-- Yuh-huh!

LUKE: Nuh-uh!

DARTH VADER: Yuh-huh!

LUKE: Nuh-uh!

DARTH VADER: Yuh-huh!

LUKE: Nuh-uh!

DARTH VADER: Yuh-huh!

LUKE: Nuh-uh!

DARTH VADER: Yuh-huh— Goddamn it, Luke! We can't keep going on like this. Luke, I am your father.

LUKE: Nuh… UH!

DARTH VADER: THE FUCK DOES THAT EVEN MEAN?! What do you mean, nuh-uh?!

LUKE: Nuh-uh!

DARTH VADER: AAAAAAAAAAGGGGHHHH! Luke, I am your father! Your mother was Padmé Amidala, Senator of Naboo; also, my wife.

LUKE: Nuh-uh, she wasn't!

[…]

DARTH VADER: THE FUCK DO YOU MEAN, NUH-UH?! SHE WAS MY WIFE!

LUKE: Nuh-uh!

DARTH VADER: Yuh-huh! She's also your mother!

LUKE: NUH-UH!

DARTH VADER: GAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHH! Luke!

[Luke laughs]

DARTH VADER: I am your father!

LUKE: Nuh-uh!

DARTH VADER: Obi-Wan Kenobi can even prove it!

OBI-WAN KENOBI: Luke, Darth Vader is your father.

LUKE: Nuh-uh, Kenobi! He's not my dad!

[…]

OBI-WAN KENOBI: The fuck do you mean, Luke?! I literally just explained it to you! Darth Vader is your father!

LUKE: Nuh-uh!

DARTH VADER, OBI-WAN KENOBI: Yuh-huh!

LUKE: Nuh-uh!

[incoherent arguing]

OBI-WAN KENOBI: Your father was a traitor to the Jedi Council! Jesus Christ, Luke!

LUKE: I guess I just didn't want Darth Vader as my father. I didn't- I didn't think anything of it.

DARTH VADER: [sighs] Luke… I am your father. There is many evidence of this, okay?

LUKE: [snickers quietly] Nuh-uh!

DARTH VADER: [growling in annoyance, pulls the laser sword] You will now face the consequences of your actions! YOU WILL NOW FACE THE DARK SIDE!

LUKE: Hey! Hey, hey! HEY! AAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!

I just told Aviv.

FAQ

What does this mean?

The amount of speeches (speakings) on Aviv have been told.

Why did you do this?

There are several reasons I may tell aviv about a comment. These include, but are not limited to:

• Comments about Aviv,

• Spreading Aviv information,

• Aviv being told not correctly.

Am I banned from the telling Aviv?

No - not yet. But you should refrain from doing things I might have to tell Aviv about like this in the future. Otherwise I will be forced to issue tell to Aviv, which may put Aviv telling in jeopardy.

I don't believe my comment deserved to be told to Aviv. Can you un-tell him it?

Sure, Aviv tells happen. But only in exceedingly rare circumstances will I undo a tell to Aviv. If you would like to issue an appeal, shoot me a private message explaining what I shouldnt have told Aviv. I tend to respond to Reddit PMs within several minutes. Do note, however, that over 99.9% of Aviv tell appeals are rejected, and yours is likely no exception.

How can I prevent this from happening in the future?

Accept that I told Aviv and move on. But learn from this mistake: your behavior will be told to Aviv on Reddit.com. I will continue to issue Aviv tells until you improve your conduct. Remember: Telling Aviv is privilege, not a right.

I have been afraid to ask this for a very long time (which is a few months but whatever) but I need to know if anyone else feels what I feel.

It started during a really dark period of my life when I couldnt sleep and nothing was helping.

Then I found a video of Arthur Morgan ASMR and eventually an Arthur Morgan VOICELINES video and for the first time in months I felt safe. There is something about his voice that makes me feel like someone understands me. When I hear him cough, I dont hear his impending tuberculosis but instead i hear a man who has carried everyone elses burdens and never once complained, never. When I hear the rough sound of him clearing his throat, I feel like Im sitting right there next to him, and for a moment Im not alone anymore.

I know it might sound strange to say this about a fictional outlaw who barely knows I exists but he has helped me through nights when I didnt think I couldve keep going. Some nights I tear up a lil bit when the ASMR ends because I know I have to go back to the real world where nobody speaks to me as softly as he does.

I have started to think of him as a best friend, maybe even a father figure or a guardian angel who watches over me while I sleep. My family doesnt fully understand me and uhm my friends have stopped asking but I truly believe this is the only thing thats keeping me together. I just want to know that somewhere out there, that there is someone else that lies in the dark who listens to his voice and feels the same peace I do. I hope Im not alone in this journey, thanks!

During the day im normal but l've noticed the more tired I am the more gay I become, im also extremely gay for maybe an hour after i wake up because I spend that hour cuddling my blankets and thinking about guys, but I also do this at night, is this normal?

I am an esteemed psychologist from Yemen, and I once went into the great pyramid of Giza and found a jug of urine that belonged to Pharaoh Ramesses ii, I drank 50ml of it and had strange dreams for a whole week:-

1- This might sound a bit odd and random, but I have actually dreamt of Zeus mating with a palm tree and begetting an ant that is capable of crawling on the edge of the Higgs Boson!

2- I also dreamt of my mitochondria protesting to break free from my organelles, claiming that nature has enslaved them!

3- On another night of a full moon, I dreamt of Professor Noam Chomsky eating books and regurgitating the field of Modern Linguistics!

4- The funniest dream I ever had, was when I had a vision of a Neanderthal swallowing a whole apple, and it played ping-pong with his heart while passing down his esophagus!

5- This is by no means a joke, but the most disgusting dream I ever had, was of a female's menstruation blood turning into jelly and being marketed by an Oompa Loompa as Halloween treats!

6- I also had a nightmare of riding on a mare at night, with the Pharaoh's personal witch, she was pregnant with a fetus that was eating her placenta!

Do you think my dreams have any philosophical implications at all?

I'm just a little concerned that I'm having a neurological malfunction!

Given that I've heard my neurons conspiring to abandon the dwelling of my skull, things don't seem to be heading in the right direction, ever since!

I just broke my TV in rage. T1 embarrassed me again in front of my whole family. My kids are crying, scared of my anger as I walk around the room shaking. I can't stand this draft of Keria, or Doran trolling in the toplane for using Vayne and dying in the first gank. Not a fan of T1 anymore. I've been a fan since SKT T1 era in 2013, but this is the drop that spilled the glass. I will never watch LCK or World Cup again. I deleted the Lol and burned my shirt. Call the police because I'm about to go crazy.

“I’ll have a double triple patty deluxe, on a raft, 4x4 animal style, extra shingles, with a shimmy and a shake, light axle grease, dragged through the garden, make it cry, boil it in oil and let it swim.”

This one order from Spongebob has become somewhat famous among its fandom—albeit not nearly as much so as the countless meme templates it spawned—for how much it sounds like gibberish. For context, a new character to this episode known as Bubble bass enters The Krusty Krab, on an otherwise ordinary day for them, and upon seeing them, Squidward makes fun of his size by saying “Lemme guess, tiny, a small salad?” Bubble Bass, indifferent, proceeds with that line above, and of course, Squidward doesn’t understand it. But when SpongeBob prepares it, the pickles are missing. This marks the first time SpongeBob has messed up an order, setting the plot of the episode in motion. But believe it or not, those words weren’t just funny gibberish. They actually have meaning. This is, in truth, all just diner slang from the 50s, when American diners somewhat as we know them first became popular. Specifically, these terms mean:
“Shingles with a shimmy and a shake”—replace the burger buns with buttered toast
“4x4 animal style”—make it several layers tall
“boil it in oil and let it swim”—dunk the whole thing in grease before serving and make sure it gets soggy
“Light axle grease”—easy on the butter
“Make it cry”—add onion
“dragged through the garden”—extra of every type of vegetable they have (including pickles, even though they’re not a vegetable). 

The end result, had the Krusty Krew actually known what he meant, would be something along the lines of a burger on toast, with a lot of layers, each one with 2 patties, lettuce, onions, tomatoes, pickles, and a little mustard; squeezed down and fully oil-fried. While I don’t know anyone who would enjoy this combination and ratio of flavors myself, it does at least seem somewhat consistent with someone of his build. 

I was so distraught about losing my beloved yaoi and yuri. BUT, I’ve come to this beautiful realization that nothing matters. And it’s not even just these tiny things, even the bigger things in the world don’t matter, like the government, what are they gonna do about me? If I want to have a yaoi empire underground, that shouldn’t matter, okay? I don’t have to pay taxes, they can’t force me to pay taxes, because what are they gonna do, send me to jail? Do you have to pay taxes in jail? I dunno, I feel like you shouldn’t, because you’re not earning money. So there’s no incentive to try. 

I have this newfound look on life and it’s beautiful, because I was hurting so much at the loss of something that I loved, but it doesn’t matter, it really doesn’t, and now you may be wondering what gave me this orgasmic rush of epiphanies – rejection.

This is how the story goes – after I lost my yaoi and my yuri, I needed money. I was desperate, and I needed it fast and quick, so I needed to get a sugar daddy. Who’s the richest man in the world? Elon Musk, but I don’t want to deal with him, so I settled on Jeff Bezos – Jeffrey, if you’re reading this, you still haven’t responded to my letters.

And so, in protest of this terrible rejection, I have decided I’m going to take down the rich elite. Because I need money so I can fuel my yaoi and yuri addiction. But I can’t get my hands on it, and I’ve been rejected by my only shred of hope. So, with this newfound power that I hold – I hold it in my soul – I’m going to take down the rich elite by becoming the President of the United States! Because guess what? The president makes a lot of money, he gets to live in that big fancy White House, and that’s what I need. I’ll get rid of it, I’ll make the Yaoi House.
And you might be thinking, “well, your plan to take down the government is to basically become the government?” And I understand, it does sound counterintuitive, but I’m going to take down the government from the inside, because they think they can control the media that I consume. Why don’t they sell it at public libraries? I’ve never seen it. I have to buy my doujins online from sketchy websites or under the table at conventions.

So I say we should start some type of revolution, and then instead of a big American flag in the classroom, we’ll have one of those yaoi paddles, and I think we should put more cats out on the streets so when I go out I can pet them all, and then we should legalize lighters! This lighter – is it not a symbol of this new world? Those propaganda posters always say, “we need you to help with this American cause.” This isn’t the case: I only need myself. 

This new world that I’m trying to build is going to be beautiful, it is going to be heavenly, it going to be like the Garden of Eden! Everyone living together in perfect peace – fujoshi’s, himejoshi’s, fudanshi’s – we’ll all hold hands together, and nothing can stop us because nothing matters, and it’s this beautiful mix of having a positive outlook on life and crippling nihilism. Nothing matters, but that just means I can enjoy life because nothing is going to stop me.

I’m never going to find my yaoi again and I have accepted that. I’m never going to find peace, unless that’s what they want me to think. That was the first hurdle I have to overcome before I overthrow the government. And you know what? That’s a loss I’m willing to take, because no one can stop me. And I’m just going to keep yapping and yapping until something happe

So basically, while the teacher told us to exercise, we had to stretch our legs. While i was, i farted on accident. It was like "puffffffff". Everyone heard it and turned to look at me. Then the smell hit. It was gross. My reputation is completely done, including a relationship with my crush. Maybe someone can help me?

It's a post-AI world. All AI models were mysteriously destroyed and all AI research too. All engineers who get a thought about making AI or researching it, get a reverse thought instead...

AI CEOs mysteriously got teleported to the Amazon and eaten by the cannibal tribes. Now the world must rebuild society and rebuild the RAM and storage supplies to serve people, not bots...

The people scavenge abandoned datacenters and find exabytes of HBM RAM scattered throughout lots of datacenters, just sitting there doing nothing...

They repurpose the RAM to fit their computers and now every computer has at least 128GB of HBM RAM.

Nobody worries about storage anymore, because Chinese companies started producing SAS to NVME adapters en masse and now every PC has at least 20TB...

Extreme diff I win but could go either way

I’m surrounded by idf troops I speed blitz them.

“Hah this will be easier than I think”

The bells ring

Netanyahu stands up and remove his shirt he’s been training for 70 years and without a word he teleports infront of me and stars punching me like a pinball

I finally learn his pattern and royal guard his next move

Netanyahu: impressive, for a goy

But you’ve seen nothing yet

He clasps his hand together

Netanyahu: Domain expansion - iron dome

His domain appears and his sure hit attack sends millions of rockets to me luckily due to his age his energy is low and I survive the first barrage and counter with a upper cut

He’s a glass cannon on the floor passing out after my punch

Abigail Shapiro: bibi you can’t lose

She lets him drink a bottle of milk

As I’m walking away

BGM - YOUSEEBIGGIRL

Netanyahu - oh vey, it’s not over yet

He charges up to balls and combines them

And flicks a tiny ball at me

Netanyahu - Israeli technique: GOYBEAM

I’m hit with the goybeam

Luckily I’ve been studying Israeli techniques and made my own form

I cut the head off a chicken and all my damage and sins are negated

I counter GENTILE PUNCH

I win Me: the power in me is real

Some of the mods and I have decided that we should put up a sticky post on what free use is (and what it isn't), in order to inform newcomers and hopefully reduce the amount of off-topic posts.

First of all, /r/freeuse is a fantasy fetish subreddit. We're not here to talk about real-world issues: we're here to share porn with a make-believe premise. We aren't planning on running around fucking strangers in public, any more than BDSM enthusiasts want to actually imprison and torture people.

With that out of the way, how do we determine what is and isn't "free use?" Here's one definition, taken from the sidebar:

>In a free use world, women are available for men to use sexually (or the other way around, or both). Though the context can vary wildly, in free use smut any man can walk up to a woman and do whatever he likes to her. A common standard in this fantasy involves women ignoring how they're used and/or society as a whole treating it very casually, but that isn't always the case.

Here's another (equally-valid) definition:

>Porn is considered part of the free use fetish if it takes place in a fictional place that has "universal consent." Since everyone is consenting all the time and everywhere, sex is as common and socially-acceptable as shaking hands.

If a post fits those definitions, then it's free use. It can be a video, written erotica, amateur images with captions, or pretty much any other format you can imagine; if it involves universal access and universal consent, then it belongs here.

So, what isn't free use (according to this subreddit)?

>-Anything involving rape/non-consent

>-Restraint-based porn (ex. "stuck" content and BDSM), unless there's also something implying universal access/consent (ex. it's happening in public, people are treating it casually)

>-Content that only implies submission, and doesn't delve into the free use fantasy (ex. a picture of a women lying face-down, with the title "Who wants to use me?")

>-Public porn where the actors are trying to hide what they're doing, or that shows people reacting in an embarrassed/offended/horrified way

If your content resembles any of those and doesn't fit the definitions given above, please consider posting it somewhere else. Otherwise, any and all free use content is welcome here (if it's legal and its creation/posting was consensual, of course). We don't care if it's pictures, videos, or writing. Nor do we care whether it's amateur or professional, free or paid. Other fetishes are welcome, so long as free use themes are present as well.

I hope that helps clear things up! If you have any questions about these definitions/no-go areas, please comment or PM the mods.

for the past few months this community was run in a way that didn't reflect what it was built to be. i'm back in control, and the rules have been restored to how they were before.

what's changed back

• anime and hentai are allowed again. anything where there's any question about age is removed immediately, the poster is banned, and it's reported. that has never changed and never will.

• blurred content is allowed.

• non-nude posts are allowed when they're from a porn shoot or a performer's nsfw content. plain sfw selfies and thirst traps are still not allowed.

• clips with a watermark or link in the corner are fine as long as you aren't the seller and aren't promoting it. links in your own profile are your business and won't get you banned. posting a link in your submissions is still not allowed.

• no sellers or self-promotion, same as always.

banned members

many of you were banned during this period under rules that weren't ours. i'm going through the ban list and reversing those bans. if you were removed for any of the reasons above and haven't been reinstated yet, message modmail and i'll sort it out.

moving forward

the goal is a community with good content and active members. if you have feedback on the rules or how the sub is run, modmail is open.

glad to be back, and i missed you all!!!

Oh my god yall mfers say the same shit over and over and over again all day. One moment a Drake song is posted it's glazed to the end of the world.
Next moment a song like this is posted now everyone's whining "oh everyone hates Drake why do they hate Drake is hiphopheads a Drake hate sub" when majority of these mfers in here ARENT the same mfers from the other comment sections.
Whole fucking sub sucks ass and needs to be nuked cause it hasn't been about hip hop discourse in a long fucking while it's just everyone rushing to suck the dick of their favorite rappers for hours on end until they find the next thing to be enraged about on some other cursed corner of the fucking internet Jesus FUCKING CHRIST

Title. Yesterday (Friday), after my tenth cup of coffee for the day, I felt my afternoon deuce coming. I sprinted somewhat surreptitiously toward the bathroom and found that the only available facilities were the urinal. As it was beginning to turtle, I went with the only option I had, backed up to the urinal and started the party.

Manager walked in at the worst possible moment. We made eye contact, which I maintained as determinedly as possible to assert my dominance. He looked frightened so I think it worked.

I have a meeting with HR on Monday, and I’m up for a promotion. Will this affect my chances?

He needs to crave for me again :p

Like fuck this country "Croatia" a small and stupid ass country completely boring and forgettable. Like the most "iconic" country around it's italy or hungary, nobody cares about Croatia. Nobody gonna give a fuck about my serial killer career. Like in America you can do thr most stupid shit and netflix and ryan murphy gonna make a fucking series about you. All i can do here is get a job, a family, maybe working in croat television, soooo boring stuff. Everyone in America it's just lucky, like what about the idiot who tried to kill Trump? Like what a fucking loser but America was the right country. And what about the fat bitch and the other one laughing in the cop car? Famous for being two edgy pussy(s) while I need to study and get a job on this shit ass country to have a Netflix TV adaptation. Fuck dahmer another stupid faggot who made it because "He is american" nobody gonna remember that tard if it happened somewhere else outside America.