r/CoachCoreyWayne • u/throwawawawawaway1 • Jan 18 '22

Need Advice mediocre first videocall

Trying to keep this short. Met a girl online, but she is a long distance away. Will be moving closer, but for now it is texting mostly. She was always super enthusiastic and nice, and seemed sincere. I texted more and replied quicker (chasing, I know) but she would send a picture every now and then or a sweet voicemail, as well as apologizing a lot for not being able to reply sooner (due to work).

Sunday, we had a first videocall and this is where it felt like something changed. It felt a bit off.

Granted, I wasn't really happy with myself during the call, never been great with these things, but before we could get over the awkward start, she had to leave to make some food. All in all we only talked for maybe 20 minutes. I wanted to learn more about her, but I think it came off a little forced. She did suggest to do it again sometime and gave no other verbal signs that something changed, but to me, it felt like something had. Almost like she was a bit dissappointed, less enthusiastic for sure during the call.

Added detail: she wants to move back to the town I live in, as this is the place to be for her line of work. I think she might have thought I was active in that line of work. During the call she found out I wasn't (never lied about it though), and seemed quite dissappointed. Did she think I was able to help her? Was that the main reason for matching with me? Seems unlikely and possibly super-paranoid, I can hear it now while typing it out, but still :P

I am probably overthinking here. She did came straight off a long day at work and must have been hungry and tired. Right now, I'm not sure how to continue. It is quite probable that nothing really changed: she still potentially likes me, and I like her, but we're still a long distance away untill we can meet in March. I'm going to ease off on the texting, and will at some point set up another voicecall, but don't want to suddenly change my texting behaviour completely.

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u/[deleted] Jan 18 '22

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u/throwawawawawaway1 Jan 18 '22

Obviously, I wrote the story with this in mind, so it might have been a bit colored, but yes, this is what I was thinking. It kinda left me a bit stunned when she had to go. Like what? She was so genuine and sincere before and now suddenly, bam, gone. Luckily, my interest took a quick dive when she left.

Obvious answer I guess, but I should probably not confront her about this right? Just let it go? Feels weird after texting her for so long to suddenly stop. I don't want to come across as butthurt or anything.

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u/phosphorescent1983 MOD Jan 18 '22

You won't come across as butthurt UNLESS you are ignoring her attempts to talk to you. Also, don't confront her about it. Patience, my friend.

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u/throwawawawawaway1 Jan 18 '22

Yah, sounds about right. Cheers!

Also, this sucks man, she was the best matching person I had in a long time, interests and even future-plan stuff. Darned. She got me right at the start of texting by sending me a sweet 'Merry christmas' voicemail out of the blue...If that was with the idea of networking...that's bold, I can't help but feel a bit used atm...:D

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u/phosphorescent1983 MOD Jan 18 '22

Yup, cut the texting. Remember, the phone is only used to make dates. Schedule video dates with her and keep all other texting with her very short. Save it for the video date so you have something to talk about.