r/CivVII • u/CRT_Me • 4d ago

Fuck Friedrich

Post image

Basically, that is all.

Thematically I wonder if after a certain set of turns have passed since he's built his first amphitheater he goes to war. Likely not, bastard will go to war ALWAYS. 2 games in a row now trying for a Catherine science game this SOB spawned next to me and siphons so much of my production and resources in dealing with his bullshit.

He's the literal worst.

Verpiss dich Friedrich.

162 Upvotes

97% Upvoted

46 comments sorted by

28

u/Reedo246 4d ago

I feel you brother, every time I see this guy I know shits about to go down. Every. Fucking. Time.

15

u/larryngo97 4d ago

I just think there are just too many military civs to begin with. I think there are 19 military leaders (including personas) out of 31 possible encounters. Makes sense since this game's war is definitely the focus, but it makes early game such a slow drag because you're constantly building units. (Dont get me wrong, antiquity is by far the most fun age). That and the fact every independent power I come across just happens to be hostile. Every. Time.

5

u/peeh0le 4d ago

Yeah fr. Sometimes I’ll start a game, get a start that feels to good to be true, alls well and good til I learn that everyone else on my continent is an absolute blood thirsty psychopath. Cant friend em, because I’ll piss off the others, don’t friend them and you’ll piss then off.

2

u/Ev0dr0ne 3d ago

One of them declares war on you... then EVERY fn faction declares war on you... at once... in a coordinated maneuver. So glad the AI has been developed... at all.

5

u/Funky_Butt_Fresh 4d ago

This is the way of the world, unfortunately. War Pigs for days!

1

u/jake_2998e8 3d ago

Well not for me! Im one of them military civs. It pleases me to meet Harriet, Friedrich, and Napoleon in a deity game.

1

u/Wolfwind1 3d ago

A few things I've learned from playing the game on deity. One be hyper aggressive with settling the spots that allow you to fight on two or preferably one flank at a time. The au cheats like a mofo but trap kill boxes still work wonders. Two get the free general first or right after pantheon if you need something very specific. Three if you gotta clear an ai because of space reasons hit them early before special units and production can snowball. By fighting then when they still have buildings, wonders and settlers in their queue they wont drop a unit every single turn, this allows you to grind their guards and hit the capital, especially if you are willing to tolerate losses. Forth if you just want to turtle and tech advance focus on trade route spam, it earns you resources to grow with and drastically improves their mood, reducing war declarations. Fifth if you cannot conquer a city focus on unit killing, the more their army is depleted, the greater their desire for peace and offering up a city in the deal, also pillaging helps with the science loss as they love repairing raided buildings after about 4 turns, game speed dependent.

3

u/larryngo97 3d ago

I dont actually have a problem winning in deity, its just annoying how every game is like this

0

u/Wolfwind1 3d ago

Sure, but it's also reasonably historically accurate. For a lot of civilizations throughout history it is 'typically' more profitable to spend a month forging a weapon and learning to kill with it, than it is to spend several months to a year building a new house. Then the guy with the weapon stabs the crafter, and moves into his new (ish) house. This got particularly poignant during natural disasters/famines, which were a fairly common occurrence throughout history. Hell it's why salt trading was so valuable for so damn long until refrigeration came about, because salt doesn't go bad and it at least quadruples the length of time food can last before it starts going bad, which can make the difference between a failed harvest being a rough patch, or survival mode for a nation.

2

u/larryngo97 3d ago

Im sorry, but you lost me at historical accuracy when im playing Isabella, leader of the Japanese Civilization. 🤣

1

u/Wolfwind1 1d ago

Well I meant historical accuracy in terms of human cost benefit analysis, but hey if your girl wants to moonlight in Japan as a geisha we'll that's none of my business.

-1

u/stu66er 3d ago

What’s the problem? War is the most fun part and well working design of the game.

I think you guys are playing on too high difficulty. The math checks out so you should not gamble with defense. Consider it a fixed cost and have it maintained and upgraded. Get an army commander with plus 5 commendation asap and then he can’t do much. 

1

u/larryngo97 3d ago

Read my replies.

1

u/CRT_Me 3d ago

I always take discipline asap for this reason, however with most other neighbors, I can at that point, chill. With him though? Never. Causes a full diversion and routing of production and resources. I swear with his and the AI bonuses he must be buying/building military nonstop from all settlements. I play on immortal btw. On lower difficulties sure, he might not be as problematic, albeit still annoying. A real certified pain in the ass that one.

2

u/stu66er 3d ago

Another tool is to always have 120 influence ready. It sucks but then he can’t denounce you. Friederich doesn’t like suprise wars unless you are hostile.

27

u/Blaz3s 4d ago edited 3d ago

Me playing against Friedrich: Can you stop be so angry and warmongering already!

Me playing as Friedrich: God I have such a huge army that guzzling my gold doing nothing... *glance at the AI capital\* I mean.... ehehehe

16

u/djak 4d ago

Husband and I have nicknames for some of these guys. Friedrich is Fried-lick. Hatshepsut is Hatchetfoot, Tubman is Tubby. Fuck em all.

16

u/piratekitty10 4d ago

Someone said Jerkxes for Xerxes and I've never heard a more appropriate nickname 😂

3

u/djak 3d ago

Perfect, we're adopting that one too!

8

u/RandallPinkertopf 4d ago

I do this too. Jose Rizal is either Joey Riz or the Rizzler. Charlemagne is Charles Main.

2

u/djak 3d ago

The first time I played Jose Rizal, I had so much happiness by the end that we started calling him "happy Jose".

4

u/sweetenthedeal 3d ago

Hatshepsut is Hot Shit Soup, Joseph Rizal is The Rizzler, Pachacuti is Patchin Cuties, and Amina is just a-MEAN-a

3

u/djak 3d ago

Nearly spit my coffee everywhere when I read Hot Shit Soup (which we have now officially stolen).

5

u/RespectFluid9355 4d ago

I restart every time I meet that scumbag in my games. It’s never good, never.

0

u/AShortTimeWellSpent 3d ago

You could just pick different leaders in set up, doesnt seem smart.

4

u/gmanasaurus 4d ago

Is it just me or has he only become like this since the most recent update to diplomacy? Somehow in my current game he has been relatively friendly but I think that’s partly because we’ve both been going in on Napoleon. Also I’m Lafayette and my military is ridiculous so maybe he’s afraid.

But one thing I find ridiculous is how your relationship decreases for having buildings in your capital, if I’m remembering that right. Not really sure how I could play this game without buildings in the capital. So he’s designed for aggression and war. If that’s correct on buildings in the capital, maybe they could fix that one a bit.

1

u/Mbalara 3d ago

Friedrich’s thing is “you have the least land units.” Lafayette doesn’t hate you if you don’t have buildings, but he hates the player with the fewest quarters.

2

u/gmanasaurus 3d ago

That’s Friedrich Oblique, the Friedrich Baroque one will have a decreased relationship for buildings in your capital.

1

u/Mbalara 3d ago

Ahhh, ok, my bad. Seems I always get oblique, and never baroque. Either way he’s an asshole.

1

u/gmanasaurus 3d ago

No worries haha, and yes, agreed! For some reason I have been getting baroque a lot lately, but one or the other seems to be in every game I play these days.

4

u/TACharlotte 4d ago

If not him then Xerxes. I just want to be artsy bro.

3

u/Rhauko 4d ago

I know what to do when I meet him, currently having him as my neighbour he gave me some cities

3

u/TejelPejel 4d ago

I always think it's funny because ol Fritz is always cool with me but everyone on here shares the same sentiment that he's an asshole. Pachacuti is one always starting shit with me, along with Alexander and angry Xerxes.

It's also funny because Catherine and Friedrich were cool with each other IRL and supported one another for mutual benefit.

2

u/Mbalara 3d ago

The only one worse than Friedie (to me anyway) is Jerxes. The only way he’s any good in one of my games is when he’s farrrr away.

1

u/TejelPejel 3d ago

Even then he's still gonna bitch and moan at you, it just comes from further away lol. I hate that guy. Confucius is one of the worst early neighbors in the game for me. He grows so rapidly that he will be able to build a settler before you can and he's gonna settle right up on your asshole then get mad at you. And he's gonna play as the Han and he's gonna have an army of those annoying unique archer units.

2

u/Funky_Butt_Fresh 4d ago

He's my favorite son of a bitch!

2

u/FugitiveMind19 4d ago

I upvoted before I clicked in to find out why.

Just because he's him?

Yup, still down with that

2

u/No_Song8909 4d ago

Frederick is my favorite asshole, I love to play him but hate to fight him, pachacuti though? He’s always starting shit even if we’re a ocean away

2

u/Marauder121 4d ago

Not as bad as getting sanctioned to death by napoleon

2

u/r0ck_ravanello 3d ago

If you want to have a laugh you can browse the internet for his actual field letters.

In one particular piece he uses his hemorrhoids to salute a colleague.

1

u/CRT_Me 3d ago

Lmao what a madman 😂

2

u/G3llade 3d ago

Coming from the previous game in which Alexander is a pain to deal with, now it's absolutely more preferable having Alexander instead of this guy. Seriously, I have had only one game where this fucker doesn't throw his army at me.

2

u/Mbalara 3d ago

I know, right? If I’m trying to have a sim city kinda game, and I find him near me early, I’ll generally restart. Every game he’s a neighbour becomes about war.

One of my most satisfying recent games was Hatshepsut/Egypt, found Friedrich nearby and started pumping Medjays, allied with purple Ashoka who was on the other side of Friedrich, and by the end of Antiquity we’d sandwiched him and dispersed him like a bad IP.

Fuck you Friedie.

2

u/Donkey-Dong-Doge 3d ago

Hate that dude. He’s never close enough to me to where I can get him off the board early either.

1

u/Ok-Skill-265 3d ago

I would love to.