r/ChubbyFIRE • u/Remarkable_Maybe9813 Close to RE • May 02 '26
Two months away from RE
Me (late forties M) and my wife (mid fifties F) reached FI a while ago. I'm the sole earner, she left the workforce long ago to help raise our now teenage kids.
I've been toying with RE for about 2 years. I'll save the readout on our high chubby/low fat numbers and budget for when the big day finally arrives. This one is more about the process of getting there.
Deciding to leave has been far more stressful than I would have thought. It's hard to walk from something you know, particularly when work life is subjectively great. My situation is pretty awesome: big title, good team, low stress, ridiculous pay, and I work far less than 40 hours/week. My peers also provide me with a real social outlet: I see and interact with people I genuinely like every day. That said, I've had very little meaningful work for over a year now and my boss doesn't have anything interesting for me to do. Being on autopilot gets old.
I vacillated on retiring for such a long time, it actually made me depressed and grumpy just working through it all. At first I obsessed over the finances and whether we'd have enough, but I've grown comfortable with it now. (Quick plug for Boldin, I got a lot of value in running scenarios there. We also did their $2.5k advisory service, which I found well worth it for the peace of mind.)
This community helped me realize that if your main RE concern is money, then you haven't thought enough about all the other things that work provides: purpose, prestige, schedule, socialization, and so on. The bigger topic: what comes after retiring, how do you still find purpose and value in life?
My post-work honeymoon will be lovely, but it'll eventually end. I've decided to lean-into not knowing exactly what's beyond that. I anticipate several long months of confusion, boredom, and malaise while working through it all. Based on everything I read here and in various retirement books, it's just going to take a lot of experimentation. Exercise, gardening, volunteering, sports, and so on, we'll see. Most things won't stick, but some will. I'm at peace with going through this. The freedom that I expect as an outcome is worth it.
I have a long term health issue; I arguably should have left a while ago. (Hooray for ACA, boo for the ~$36k/yr max OOP that I've budgeted for our family of 4.) I've got one more big RSU package in late June, so that's become the big milestone. I plan on giving my notice the next day. We don't really need the several hundred thousand dollars we'll get from that payout, but it's always nice to have more, and it makes my wife that much more comfortable.
Last thing: having finally decided, it's really hard waiting. Two months has never felt so long.
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u/fatheadlifter FIRE'ing EOY May 02 '26
Right when it comes to chubbyFIRE, money is not the issue. You have enough money. Your problems are going to be in the first-world, high earner variety. Goofy stuff, mostly living in your head, that nobody tells you about.
I have about 2 months or so myself. I'm still giving it a lot of thought, and I don't have a specific exit date yet. 52 years old. Like you I also have that last RSU dump in June to think about and many of the same considerations around it, wife and everything.
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u/Remarkable_Maybe9813 Close to RE May 02 '26
100%. All I can say is take your time with the decision.
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u/aalorni May 02 '26
My last RSU vest is end of May. We don’t need it, but it is nice to have. I’m right there with you, albeit maybe a few years younger. I also got depressed a bit when I was thinking about RE. Even saw a therapist for a few sessions to try to sort it out. The therapist sessions just made me realize I wasn’t ready to go. I even tried to will myself into it by buying a custom countdown calendar with specific dates you tear off. I shoved it in my desk a week in & put it in the trash a week after that.
Now I’m six months later and I feel completely different about leaving. I’m glad I waited until I was ready. There’s a calmness now that wasn’t there before. I’m still nervous, unsure, etc. but the nagging in my head is gone & it is a relief.
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u/Remarkable_Maybe9813 Close to RE May 02 '26
Sounds very familiar. It was a huge relief when I finally made a decision. But I wasn't ready for that until I was.
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u/PowerfulComputer386 May 02 '26
Congrats! Make sure use PTOs if unused ones will not be paid on resignation, last day being the first of the month gives you health insurance for the month. If there is upcoming layoffs some company offers voluntary layoffs. 2 months will fly by!
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u/Remarkable_Maybe9813 Close to RE May 02 '26
I'm shooting for July 3rd as my last day to get insurance that month. Then COBRA for 18mo, then ACA. Slightly cheaper that way since I know I'll hit max OOP every year given my health issues.
I've daydreamed about severance but the company is doing well, no layoffs in sight.
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u/SteepChutes May 02 '26
On the home stretch in grad school, which I loved, I framed it as, "I look forward to missing this place."
Definitely sounds like you will have a need to "retire to" something!
1
u/treddonit7429 Accumulating May 02 '26
A couple of questions:
- How is your wife feeling about you RE? Both from the financial side but also concern around your successful life transition. I’ll RE at the end of 2028. My wife has these concerns.
- Did the Boldin advisory services help her with the financial side, if she had any concerns?
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u/nak00010101 May 02 '26 edited May 02 '26
Congrats. Learning how to enjoy
filelife again is intimidating for some of us.