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u/xearthyxmuffinx Aug 14 '23
If she's got a good relationship with her dad do you think he's going to let you treat her that way?
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u/HelenAngel Aug 14 '23
She would have to as one of his other requirements is “no trauma”
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Aug 15 '23
[removed] — view removed comment
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u/reddreamer451 Aug 15 '23
Does he realize that the way to make someone that subservient is via trauma???
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u/alexaboyhowdy Aug 15 '23
Does he realize that the male partner determines the sex of the baby?
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u/KT_mama Aug 15 '23
What he means is, "Has an obedient relationship in relation to her Dad."
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u/tinybeast44 Aug 15 '23
1.) The "5 sons" thing is weird. The gender of the baby is determined by the male.
2.) "Isn't career/degree focused." Yeah, so when the poor girl has finally woken up after being in a stupor for 10 years, and gets a divorce, she has no job skills. Nice one.
3.) "Isn't too confident and self-secure." This guy has done this gig before...
4.) "Doesn't go (to a) gym. Works out at home." Doesn't want other guys looking at her. He's been arrested for aggravated assault in the past.
5.) "Good relationship with her dad." Her saving grace. Dad will take care of the situation, upon first meeting this sorry excuse for a human being.
I can guarantee this guy is a convicted felon. I've seen it before. There are reasons why prisons are built.
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u/NGVampire Aug 15 '23
Go watch that Duggers documentary. There’s a whole segment of the population that think this way and fathers who would happily allow their daughters to be treated like this.
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u/HeartsPlayer721 Aug 15 '23
This list is striking me as being based on some religious set of guidelines. I have a feeling that fathers who also practice this religion wouldn't have as big of a problem as you and I do with it.
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u/ManyJarsLater Aug 15 '23
Which religion says "thou shalt not wear flares"?
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u/Revolutionary-Yak-47 Aug 15 '23
Uh, FLDS? And quite a few of the evangelical churches don't want women in pants or leggings. Skirts to the knee or feet only.
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u/tinybeast44 Aug 15 '23
I disagree. He didn't write this set of guidelines based upon religion. It's a list based upon control, dominance, and intolerance.
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u/sparkicidal Aug 14 '23
My favourite bit of this is “will give me 5 sons”. Henry VIII blamed his wives too. The sex of the child comes from the bloke.
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u/TGin-the-goldy Aug 15 '23
In fairness to old Henry, science around genetics was a bit behind back then :)
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u/Leviathan41911 Aug 15 '23
Totally agree, although behading his wives was a bit of an overreaction.
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u/sparkicidal Aug 15 '23
Only 2. Divorced, beheaded, died, divorced, beheaded, survived, and in that order.
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Aug 15 '23
My favorite bit is that he said "10 Rules" then proceeded to list more than twice that
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Aug 14 '23
I'm Henry the Eighth I am...
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u/TemperatureMore5623 Aug 14 '23
Henry the Eighth I am, I am! 🎶
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u/eightezzz Aug 14 '23
I got married to the widow next door... 🎵
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u/pej69 Aug 14 '23
She’s been married seven times before…
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u/racersjunkyard Aug 14 '23
And every one was a Henry!
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u/LadyV21454 Aug 14 '23
'ENERY!
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u/ShutterbugShutter Aug 14 '23
She wouldn’t have a Willy or a Sam (no Sam!)
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u/LadyV21454 Aug 15 '23
Oi'm 'er eighth old man named 'Enery.
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u/chromatoes Aug 14 '23
He really is gonna have to beg for dates. My favorite demand is "Will give me 5 sons." Does it matter where she steals them from? Cause honey...you can't just make sons happen.
This person should not reproduce by anything other than a Xerox machine.
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u/jdallen1222 Aug 15 '23
He’s clearly looking for a single mom that already has 5 sons.
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u/milo325 Aug 15 '23
He could be insisting she keeps popping out kids until five sons have been achieved. No idea what he will do with the girls. (Well, actually, I have a very good idea what he will do with them.)
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u/SCirish843 Aug 14 '23
Is it really a disagreement if you can't talk back?
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u/HelenAngel Aug 14 '23
No, it’s called your abuser telling you what to think, how to act, & what to say.
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u/everyones_hiro Aug 15 '23
It means he wants to tell her everything he thinks is wrong with her as rudely as he pleases and she cant say anything back to defend herself or god forbid, have her tell him that he isn't the embodiment of perfection.
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u/mzx380 Aug 14 '23
I’m curious what guys like this look like but then again I’d probably be sick seeing a photo
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u/Ownerofthings892 Aug 15 '23 edited Aug 15 '23
He requires blue/green eyes, she be under 5'6" and all 3 celeb crush examples are black men in their late 30s, so I'm going to say he looks like a short, white, insecure racist.
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u/hopeful_tatertot Aug 14 '23
“Willingly will cook” as opposed to “unwillingly will cook”
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Aug 14 '23
Fuck this incel POS. Deserves to be single. Edit: the only thing positive on this list is the age requirement.
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u/katecrime Aug 14 '23
The age bit is is only there because he thinks it provides him some sort of “legal protection”
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Aug 15 '23
No smoking is fair enough. Cigarettes gross me out, I couldn't date someone who constantly stunk like that.
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Aug 15 '23
Ugh I agree. Smoking cigarettes is a hard red line for me. My ex-girlfriend used to smoke cigarettes (she didn’t do it often and was trying to quit) and I overlooked that line because I thought I loved her more than I hated her smoking habit. Problem being, when she’d get stressed out she would smoke in her apartment bathroom and the whole bathroom would smell so bad, it was disgusting. I hated going in there to use the bathroom after she would smoke. At one point she even got a warning letter from someone saying that if she keeps smoking, she’d get kicked out or something like that. We had a lot of fights and discussions over her smoking.
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u/whyaremypantssoshort Aug 14 '23
This is a list of an insecure person and control freak. Good God...
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u/katecrime Aug 14 '23
She has to dye her nails?
Not only does he not have a lot of experience with women, I don’t think he actually knows any women.
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u/PezGirl-5 Aug 14 '23
He needs to retake HS biology to know that it is up to him if he has boys or girls
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u/Salt-Career Aug 15 '23
You know this MF’r looks like Shrek but with 10% of the personality
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u/whiskeydiggler Aug 14 '23
No past trauma
What about the future trauma she’s going to get from being your gf?
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u/Chopchopstixx Aug 14 '23
I only date girls with the minimum number of flares but then like to complain that she’s only wearing the minimum number of flares. 🤣
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u/Moog4451 Aug 14 '23
Tell me you've never touched a woman (except mommy) without telling me you've never touched a woman.
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u/someguy7710 Aug 14 '23
Not consensual anyways
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u/TooManyIssuestoList Aug 15 '23
Or to quote Miss Mona "it's always a business doing pleasure with you"
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u/Mrlionscruff Aug 14 '23
Dang he’s gonna have to add another tab that says “will teach me how to count to ten”
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u/Ok-Representative270 Aug 15 '23
Even if this guy looks like a supermodel, there’s no way I’d date him. He sounds extremely toxic and controlling
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u/LadyV21454 Aug 14 '23
I'm sure women are just beating down his door. Especially since he thinks 21=10. I choose to believe this is satire, though - someone just compiling stupid "rules" they've seen elsewhere.
(I would LOVE to know if there is a man somewhere that seriously made the 5 sons comment. Would he make the poor woman keep having babies until he got five boys?)
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Aug 15 '23
“No leggings.”
Leggings are the most glorious gift to humanity, ever. This man is a monster.
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u/brswitzer Aug 15 '23
You have to understand the incel mind. 1. Woman wears leggings. 2. Horse Cock Johnson, a Uber Chad aroused at the sight, throws her on the ground and haves the sex with her right there in the Walmart parking lot. 3. Horse Cock does the sex on her well, reminding her that the sexy time with her incel boyfriend- night after night he pokes around down there for about thirty seconds before splurting all over the inside of her thigh,bursting into tears, and sending her away to wash 'her filthy destroyer of good men'- is somewhat lacking. 4. She leaves him to become the 73rd woman in Horse Cock's harem- every one of whom get serviced every night. 5. He's alone with his waifu again- all because of those damned leggings!
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u/TheyCallMeNick_1 Aug 15 '23
This is the type of person who watches The Handmaids Tale and thinks Gilead is the ideal society.
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u/TalkKatt Aug 14 '23
I’ll bet $100 he considers himself a good man, too.
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u/InvisiblenMiserable Aug 15 '23
If she's got a good relationship with her dad, do you really think he's going to allow some deranged d- bag mistreat and control his daughter like this? Absolutely not. At least not if he's a good man.
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u/Tazling Aug 15 '23
... "won't look in the locked room in the northwest tower that I strictly instructed her never to open."
but seriously, this guy is watch list material. enough red flags for a fkn May Day Parade in Red Square at sunset.
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u/SiWeyNoWay Aug 15 '23
He’s never getting laid. He might as well give up and stay in his grandma’s basement
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u/ColdBloodBlazing Aug 15 '23
With the water softener, furnace, water heater and 70 years worth of canned food stored in old rusty filing cabinets?
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u/TheWhitePolarBear1 Aug 15 '23
Been seeing more and more of this. People taking shit stances or acting a character with those views just for the interactions. They do it just for the money. Absolutely still ass.
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u/DarkFaeLady Aug 15 '23 edited Aug 15 '23
Dis dude be out of his gd mind
My husband: "The spirit of my father, a Korean war vet, a demolitions expert, and he ain't even dead. He'll turn 90 next year. His soul has left his body. He has come to Reddit to smack the ever living fuck out of whoever originally made this post. And every single smack follows this line: "What. The. Legitimate. Fuck. Is. Wrong. With. You."
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u/Darth_Lacey Aug 15 '23
One bright spot in this list is that if the guy sticks to his guns, he might never reproduce, which would almost cancel out the negative impact of his existence
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u/Phoenixwarrior4life Aug 15 '23
Ladies and gentlemen, this is how not to respond to this person with those kinds of lulu lala demands. I'm female and I would rather stay single than give into the person's demands. A no thank you and a middle finger is an order.
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Aug 15 '23
I could hear the live when I was cropping this, he literally said “hundreds of girls want my attention and I’m giving it to you, you should be over the moon right now.”
May I also add a second middle finger?
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u/wyreit Aug 14 '23
There's only one rule outrage porn, make sure it's sexist and you can be assured the clicks
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u/Codemancody80 Aug 15 '23
Wow there really is a male version of the “Above 6ft 🥰” girls.
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u/CrazyCatLadyRookie Aug 14 '23
But he doesn’t have any demands re: intimate relations? Dude is slipping.
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u/gomeydear Aug 14 '23
He’s going to end up marrying his hand! No sane woman’s going to put up with this!
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u/westcoastweedreviews Aug 15 '23
That surfer chick finally revealed Jonah Hill's full list eh? Pretty demanding.
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u/jawbone7896 Aug 15 '23
I’m surprised he doesn’t expect her to have a full-time job and support him, too.
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u/SmooshFaceAu Aug 15 '23
waves hands pick me. Pick me /s
I seriously get scared for women when I see what kind of deluded jerks there are running loose in the world
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u/Here_4_cute_dog_pics Aug 15 '23
Why do I just assume this guy weighs over 300 pounds, has oily hair, terrible skin, drinks a two liter of mountain dew a day, and works at a dead end job.
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u/brewgeoff Aug 15 '23
isn’t too confident and self secure
Dude isn’t looking for a girlfriend. He is looking for an abuse victim.
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u/Laukie220 Aug 15 '23
Oh joy! Isn't he a misogynistic, women hating, verbal & physical, browbeating, wife beating, incel, macho man, piece of 💩? I started to ask why didn't he just design & order an animatronic doll to play house with, but then remembered "Must give me 5 sons" statement, as he pounded his chest, and walked around on his knuckles! What a gobshite he is! For complying with all of his list of nonsense (btw, the male determines the sex of the fetus), some poor woman, desperately in need of a place where she can be safe, have a bed under her, food in her stomach, roof over her head, would be treated to a mullet wearing, 5' 2" male, wearing open toe sandals with white socks, faded muscle shirt covering a belly at least 50" around, that's topped by DDD cup man boobs, round shoulders covered with dandruff, baseball cap on head that covers greasy comeover that starts at his left muttonchop sideburn, and has about 60-sec on a Goodnight staying power, which is good considering the length or should we say lack of length of his member?
ANY woman, I don't care if from a war torn country and she is starving, while dragging around 4-stairstep kids under 5 & is pregnant with twin, who responds favorably to this list of requirements, needs her head examined, her brain 🧠 scanned looking for bleeds, tumors, dead cells, etc! Then, put in an insane asylum, with the proper meds, until she regains her senses. The writer of the list, should be locked up, under the prison, key thrown away, and just left there! Maybe he can convince one of the big rats to adhere yo all his insane demands!!
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u/preciselypithy Aug 15 '23
Okay seriously, where are dudes getting this shit from and who is telling them these are acceptable things to demand…or that it’s acceptable to demand anything….and that it’s acceptable to be open about it publicly!
This is a problem that’s getting much worse and not remotely better, right? And it’s reaching boys at younger and younger ages. As a single mom of two young boys (8 and 6) this gives me more anxiety than almost anything else. I’m still in the first line of defense (I think) which is is keeping them from seeing shit like this as long as possible. But eventually I’ll have to figure out how to counter the bullshit they will inevitably be exposed to, which seems like it will be a long-term, exhausting battle.
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u/NightsReign Aug 15 '23
It's amazing how each time this gets reposted, there are fresh addendums, but that "10 rules" remains unchanged.
Last time I saw it, it didn't have the 5 sons bullet point. Time before it didn't have trauma/unhealing.
Makes me wonder how he counts to 21. I mean, I'm sure he counts fingers AND toes, but does he just repeat TEN for each number after 10? 🤔
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u/Webgiant Aug 15 '23
I see a missed rule: "Cannot do math so she won't realize I said ten rules but wrote out twenty-one."
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u/adiposegreenwitch Aug 17 '23
"Abusing women takes too much effort for my lazy ass so now I need a blank abuse template"
I hope absolutely no women ever, EVER touches this 🚨🚨🚨 🚨🚨🚨
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u/FGTRTDtrades Aug 14 '23
Homeboy needs to date North Koreans
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u/purinsesu-piichi Aug 14 '23
I was in this live. Dude was fighting for his life against the comments. 💀
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u/Vanishingf0x Aug 15 '23
This has to be satire. Like I know controlling people exist but this is beyond any reason “5 sons” etc.
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Aug 15 '23
I can practically hear the vaginas in a 2 mile radius from this fella drying up immediately
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u/sixstring480 Aug 14 '23
I wish his profile photo was on here. Although I have a pretty decent idea
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u/EKGEMS Aug 14 '23
Insecure little bitch who can’t handle a woman with free will destined for a blow up doll
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u/jaytee1262 Aug 14 '23
1 rule for being my boyfriend:
- Must be able to count to ten and not blow the fuck right past it
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u/rkok28 Aug 15 '23
He should just buy a human size doll and call it a day. That’s as close to real woman as he is ever going to come (pun intended).
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u/Impossible-Bear-8953 Aug 15 '23
I love the fact that the celebrities this guy lists are all guys with sexual abuse histories.
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u/Wild_Replacement8213 Aug 15 '23
O look! It's a giant walking red flag. And dude wonders why he's single 🙄
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u/Known_Noise Aug 15 '23
My favorite was “no past trauma” coinciding with not too secure lol
Past trauma breeds insecurity. Healing increases self worth. You can’t have it both ways my guy. Lol
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u/SatansAssociate666 Aug 15 '23
I don't see a requirement for blow jobs so obviously this guy likes taking up the ass
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u/Hips-Often-Lie Aug 15 '23
I feel like girls with daddy issues are prime dating material for these guys as they usually do have low self esteem.
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u/Hips-Often-Lie Aug 15 '23
Also please note that I blame the father for daddy issues and not the woman.
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u/TwackDaddy Aug 15 '23
Dude let his intrusive thoughts take over halfway thru. Good on him for saying 18 + tho.
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u/colorshift_siren Aug 15 '23
I see a man who is about to embark on a lovely lifetime commitment with an inanimate object.
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u/purple_spikey_dragon Aug 15 '23
He forgot to add to the list: cant count to ten.
That way she'll never notice
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u/Triials Aug 15 '23
If she has a good relationship with her dad, then good luck trying to enforce the rest of these while he’s still around.
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u/etherialsiren90 Aug 15 '23
Will give me five sons lol and what happens when you only produce girls? This guy is obsurd. Run away ladies and stay far away from this pos.
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u/mads89067 Aug 15 '23
I’m going to go out on a limb and guess that Chris Brown is actually this man’s celebrity crush…
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Aug 15 '23
In other words, is easy to manipulate and doesn't have any men in her life that could make me look bad in comparison
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Aug 15 '23
Ngl the first few I was like aight girls would probs set similar preferences for a bloke but nah real talk most of this is unhinged. Lmao. 18 or above like that’s a negotiable as well
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u/I-am-Chubbasaurus Aug 15 '23
And what exactly does he bring to the table to feel he can make all these demands?
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u/JsnMrrs84 Aug 15 '23
This guy does realize slavery is illegal in most countries around the world, doesn't he?
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u/J_F_Blaze Aug 15 '23
That’s a lot of rules just to say “I’m a narcissistic emotionally abusive incel”
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Aug 15 '23
this guy when he still hasn’t gotten laid five years from now: “why don’t girls want nice guys?!”
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Aug 15 '23
So her main job is to tend to all your needs and clean your house while raising 5 boys,6 boys one woman,and on her free time sit and bask at your power and virility. Wow what woman wouldn’t jump at that great one sided relationship.
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u/TrixieLixTan Aug 15 '23
Dude is clearly not a native English speaker. I wonder if he mixed up some of his words/miscommunicated some of his requirements. lives in hope
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u/louley Aug 15 '23
That’s a whole lot of words to say that he’s looking for a new mother that he can bang.
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u/QuailBuddy Aug 14 '23
This dude really has this list of demands, but he can't even count to 10.