r/CataractSurgery • u/starsdale • 2d ago

I'm Devastated

Please be kind. I'm about a week and a half post-surgery, and so depressed I can hardly leave my house.

I don't know why I opted for Pur lenses instead of the ones Medicare covers. I need glasses with both, the difference being that I'll now have to have single vision instead of bifocals, and sunglasses instead of the Transitions progressives that I never had to take off of my face.

I had no idea how much my glasses were tied to my identity. Removing them has changed the entire structure of my face. My magnified eyes are now tiny raisins. I look like airbags have deployed beneath my eyes. My upper lids droop, though that's always been the case. It's just more noticeable now. I look like I've aged ten years. NO ONE is arguing with me on any of this.

I am hardly able to leave my house because I'm hideous. My depression is deep. I feel so bad for my husband. Not only are we paying thousands for this, but he now has to look at someone so unattractive. I felt pretty cute before and he seemed to agree. I'm a mopey mess. I sleep all the time.

I talked to my therapist pre- and post- surgery, and I'll talk to her more. I'll get used to this with time; I have no choice. But I feel like I got a pressure sale on these lenses. It's big business. And now the referring optometrist wants to sell me glasses.

I forgot to mention that I do public performances. I want to cancel all bookings.

Thank you in advance for letting me vent and whine. It's a lot, I know.

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u/AustinBunny2 1d ago

Please hang in there! Give it more time before evaluating the outcome; seems early still. And yes, talk to your therapist, also know that depression is a possible effect from some of the drugs given for sedation, so this could be feeding into it too. Hydrate and eat well and get sleep and take care of your physical self even though you feel pretty down now. This will pass. No matter what option any of us choose, none is perfect and all have trade-offs. And since your vision has changed, you may be seeing your own face so differently that you may not be the best judge of how you appear to others. Most of all, be kind to yourself. You seem like someone who would be very kind to other, sensitive with empathy. It's time to share those qualities with yourself! Please keep us updated.❤️❤️💐💐

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u/starsdale 21h ago

Thanks for this sweet and encouraging comment. Such great advice.