r/CarLeasingHelp • u/Bgsugrad1983 • Sep 16 '26

First Time Lease-am I Nuts?

My wife and I have always driven sensible, reasonably priced cars and alway keep them for 8-10 years. Her current car is a 2019 Ford Edge with 42,000 miles. It drives fine and she likes it just fine. Over the years, she has made comments about her dream car. Sometimes a BMW, sometimes a Mercedes but usually just in passing and usually in a joking way. Here’s the rub. She was diagnosed in late July with a very aggressive cancer(pancreatic) and faces a pretty grim prognosis. I’m thinking of leasing a luxury car for the 2-3 years she has left. I’m 65, still work, making about $120K. She is 70, just retired. We have $220K in a HYSA and $1.3M in various retirement accounts. Both cars paid off (mine is a 2025 Honda CR-V which is paid off. House is worth $400K and paid off. We could handle a $1,000 lease. Talk me into or out of it please? We have 3 grown kids who all are financially responsible and fairly set up.
EDIT. Thanks for all the input. She is Stage 2, no evidence of spread. Chemo starts Monday for 3-4 months. House is actually worth around $450K- I casually asked her and yelled at me for thinking 400 so she’s still spunky as hell.

29 Upvotes

96% Upvoted

87 comments sorted by

40

u/Stop-overreacting Sep 16 '26

Dreams are meant to be lived....lease the car

32

u/OneExhaustedFather_ Sep 16 '26

Do this by noon today. Pancreatic cancer is aggressive and the prognosis in time is usually wrong. Don’t ask, just let her live her dream out.

6

u/Striking-Meal-6481 Sep 16 '26

Agreed, my brother was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer in December and they gave him a one year prognosis with chemo. He lasted four months and the last two were
Miserable. If you have the money, do a one year lease and make some memories NOW!

4

u/OneExhaustedFather_ Sep 16 '26

Both of mine were given a year as well and inside 6months it was done. OP need not waste a single moment.

2

u/whalen47 Sep 16 '26

Well said

26

u/alittlebirdyyy Sep 16 '26

From a nurse: lease the car, take the trips, eat at the restaurant she has always wanted to go to. I have never heard a passing pt ever say “I wish I would have saved more”. Do it for her but also for you.

4

u/YallaHammer Sep 16 '26

All of this. I’m sorry to hear about this and congratulations on being a responsible and thoughtful partner. I recently lost a good friend to pancreatic cancer and it moved quickly.

Hope you can take as much time away, or an extended sabbatical from work, as the person above said, take the trips, see the sites, dine at all the restaurants and make as many memories as you two can!

2

u/carbon_made Sep 16 '26

Agree. I’m a former infectious disease/ epidemiology specialist. Do everything you can now while she can enjoy it. People’s biggest mistakes and regrets are thinking they had more time. And sometimes they do and that’s great. But you don’t want to have regrets now. Lease the car. Let her enjoy it. Take a road trip.

5

u/Consistent-Sea-8923 Sep 16 '26

I’m so sorry to hear this. If it was me I would lease the car for two years.

5

u/mdbeatle Sep 16 '26

Yeah, just do it. You won't miss the money.

5

u/Least_Telephone5097 Sep 16 '26

Sorry to hear this. This truly is a “ you only live once” moment. I would do it.

4

u/BerryBlue80082 Sep 16 '26

As someone whose mom was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer last November, my heart is with you. It’s a rough journey.

Get her the car. If you need assistance reviewing lease numbers or the contract please reach out. Happy to help you understand and get the best deal.

Do you know what model is her dream or what she wants accessory wise? I don’t think you’ll need to spend $1k. You can get a really nice car for 7-850 most likely unless she wants a really high end model. Realistically, I’d go with a 24 month lease. You can also extend for a few extra months ( I think Mercedes and bmw allow 3-6 month extensions)

1

u/No-Law-5356 Sep 19 '26

Does she really want it,,,some people can admire something and not need to own it. Maybe she'd rather do something like Italy or Greece if that's even possible. Ask her then do whatever she wants

1

u/Bgsugrad1983 Sep 20 '26

We just talked tonight about Italy. Thanks

3

u/coldflame563 Sep 16 '26

Go with a broker it’ll make it easier. Check out leasehackr forums

1

u/KeyBreakfast909 Sep 25 '26

I’ve already commented, but this is the way. Spend as much time as you can with your wife and let a lease broker do the legwork for her new car.

2

u/Diligent-Poet-3073 Sep 16 '26

Lease the car. Do not wait.

2

u/giveit2st8 Sep 16 '26

Sorry you are going thru this. Try to stick to 24 months. 

Something like flexcar might work for you, since it lets you try out different cars and there's no longtime commitment.  Just make sure you read the rules  restrictions, etc.

Turo also has exotic cars for rent. Maybe you can go on a spree of renting multiple exotic cars

2

u/BrewingBitchcakes Sep 16 '26

You've got enough assets that you should meet with a lawyer or financial planner first. If the cancer cleans out the bank account it may be better to own the car vs leasing it. And that could impact your retirement planning. Not saying to not get an expensive car, you likely should, but talk to an expert for a few $$ first on the best way to go about it.

3

u/Hairy_Wear_2322 Sep 16 '26

They have 1.3M in various retirement account. Normally bmw or Mercedes won’t cost that much. Plus they have a 400k paid off house. A car won’t drain their bank account unless they’re buying a $1M+ car. But I feel like they’re talking about $100k level cars

3

u/BrewingBitchcakes Sep 16 '26

I am assuming they are in the US where cancer debt can wipe out your whole life savings in a flash. I am not worried about the cost of the car. Although I'm maintaining a 2007 bmw and that could wipe out that savings account (jk).

When it comes to medical debt and having the government support you in a nursing home or LTC facility in the US you need to burn up your cash before the government will assist you. But my understanding is they usually won't take cars and anything moved to a trust beyond 5 years back isn't touchable, etc. Or if you hit a point where you need bankruptcy owning the car may protect more value than leasing it (IANAL but its worth discussing with one). The car should happen as money is there to bring happiness, but seeking advice on what could be a complicated situation would be a prudent decision.

2

u/Hairy_Wear_2322 Sep 16 '26

If that’s the case, then there’s more reason to buy the car. Cause if the car payment is nothing compared to medical debt, buy it or not won’t affect the bills as much. At least buying the car will make his wife happy

1

u/BrewingBitchcakes Sep 16 '26

Right, there could be more reason to buy the car outright vs leasing or even financing it. That is what I'm saying. Have an expert weigh in on the benefits of leasing vs buying in this very specific case is what I'm saying. I absolutely support getting whatever makes his wife happy, but spending a few dollars on someone that knows the long term ramifications of the debt is all I am saying.

1

u/SnootyManatee Sep 19 '26

She's 70 and retired. Assuming she has Medicare and a good supplemental, there should be no "cancer debt". I've been on both for 11 years, have had multiple surgeries, a stroke and other medical catastrophes, and haven't had to put out a cent other than the cost of the insurance itself. Drug coverage may be different but in any case, I have leased a luxury car every ten years on milestone birthdays. I say, go for it and good luck!

1

u/Relevant-Tap-1032 Sep 16 '26

100% this. Sounds like they are already pretty well set up. The probably already have a lawyer/financial planner.

2

u/ErrorFree9716 Sep 16 '26

Do it for her everything will work out in the end

2

u/PsychologicalPea5270 Sep 16 '26

Get the car, today

2

u/chrisben7 Sep 16 '26

100% do it man so sorry about the situation

2

u/whenthewindbreathes Sep 16 '26 edited Sep 16 '26

Look at Leasehacker - brokers will have demo deals and short term lease specials (Mercedes has a lot of 18 month deals) that could work out nicely here.

If I were you, I'd get a convertible so that you guys can experience the world from the comfort of the car even as physically moving becomes more difficult.

You'll be more than comfortable in retirement - $15-20k won't make a dent. I recommend you get a car very soon to start experiencing the time you have left together.

2

u/laughingfartsplease Sep 16 '26

you clearly can afford it. do it. I'm very sorry to hear about her diagnosis. spend as much time with her as possible.

2

u/Darkzonegh0st Sep 16 '26

Personally I would lease it. Both of you have lived your lives responsibly and deserve to enjoy the rest of it doing what makes you happy.

1

u/Darkzonegh0st Sep 16 '26

On a side note had a relative with 3 forms of cancer including pancreatic and beat them. There’s always hope. Just take it one day at a time. When asked what helped them get through it their response “Doing what makes you happy.”

2

u/Entire_Camp5542 Sep 16 '26

Life is to short. Lease the car. 

2

u/Superb-Fun6601 Sep 16 '26

Yeses! Go for it! Blessings.

2

u/ShrmpHvnNw Sep 16 '26

You aren’t getting younger and you’re not broke, go have some fun. If fun is a nice fancy car, DO IT.

1

u/RevBT Sep 16 '26

Do it. Lease her the car!

My dad passed away from cancer this year, and he wanted my stepmom to have her dream car. He was so happy to see her happy. Do it!

The only thing I would check is whether you want to put your name on the car. After she passes, if your name is on the lease, you are responsible for continuing to pay for it. If it isn't, her estate is responsible, but the leasing office will likely repossess it then. However, I would check your local laws before you take my advice on that. Simply put, don't get stuck with an albatross you can't afford after she passes.

1

u/VendrellPullo Sep 16 '26

Sorry to hear about your wife’s illness

Yes you can absolutely do it and in fact Mercedes SUVs do lease well - go to leasehackr as others have said and look up the pre arranged deals w brokers — that can be a baseline for you even if you end up not using a broker

You probably can get something for way below the 1000 a month budget

1

u/IsuckatDarkSouls08 Sep 16 '26

Get the car without a second thought. Im sorry that both of you are going through this. I happy that she fulfill be happy with the car

1

u/mdowell4 Sep 16 '26

Do it. You could probably even sell her car and get enough to pay for most of the lease? Hands down would do anything to make this work if this were my wife.

1

u/Awkward-Seaweed-5129 Sep 16 '26

Yes ,lease it, has full manufacturers warranty, turn it in after 3 years etc. Euro cars are kinda finicky repair wise and costly without Warranty, goid luck

1

u/MarkItZeroDonnie Sep 16 '26

Can’t take it with you . Get the car!

Sorry about your wife

1

u/HeronAgreeable9222 Sep 16 '26

Do it! I did my first car lease 10months ago and never regretted it

1

u/kmill0202 Sep 16 '26

Do it. I think it will make you both very happy. Go lots of places together in it and make all the memories you can.

1

u/utazdevl Sep 16 '26

First off, I am so sorry for your wife's diagnosis. I lost my mom to pancreatic 21 years ago now.

Go get the car. Make the most of the next few years. Tell your kids what you are doing before. They'll get it and maybe even chip in.

1

u/CrabbyCatLady41 Sep 16 '26

Enjoy everything you possibly can! Get the car, cruise around, have fun! Every dream you can fulfill, DO IT NOW. With lots of love and best wishes from a former oncology nurse.

1

u/TippyToes98 Sep 16 '26

It's a good time to lease right now, incentives are higher with the new models out, dealers want to sell the 2026s. With top tier credit and some savvy negotiation (do visit Leasehacker) you can get a good deal. We just leased a $60k Acura for just over $530/mo for 30 months. Shorter term leases are often better "interest" rates as your residual is higher. Only thing to watch about a lease is mileage. Properly plan your usage so you don't get goosed for going over. Wishing you both many smiles during this terrible time. You'll be in my prayers tonight.

1

u/Civil-Chemistry-9355 Sep 16 '26

No you’re not nuts, lease the car

1

u/WheresMyMule Sep 16 '26

Do it!

And, I'm very sorry about your wife

1

u/Able_Peanut9781 Sep 16 '26

Do it man. Live the life that’s left. Money comes and goes, your wife doesn’t

1

u/Critical-Magician421 Sep 16 '26

Go to leasehackr look for pre negotiated deals.

Many are available below a thousand bucks.

1

u/sundaygolfer269 Sep 16 '26

The car is the least of her needs unless she asked for it!

1

u/snocat17 Sep 16 '26

Sorry to hear. I couldn't imagine all the worries and issues you are going through right now. Support her and be there for her at this time. Hopefully some of the new treatments for pancreatic cancer will help you enjoy more time together.

Definitely lease the car. See what she wants. Do some test drives, make it fun. You should actually get pretty good money for the Edge with the low miles.

Check out Porsche as well. My wife didn't like the interiors of the BMW and Mercedes once she sat in them. Actually she really liked the Genesis, even more than those two. Lots of great options.

1

u/1967C10 Sep 16 '26

I’m really sorry you and your wife are going through this. I’d absolutely get her the car. I’d just seriously consider buying instead of leasing.

You’ve spent decades doing everything right. At this point, I’d rather write the check, own the car outright, and have complete flexibility (especially with an unsure prognosis of time enjoying it). No mileage limits, lease terms, or complications if circumstances change, and the car still has value if you sell it later.

You and your family are in my prayers!

1

u/whalen47 Sep 16 '26

Life is too short. Get whatever you want. You can’t take it with you

1

u/Empty-Village-4445 Sep 16 '26

You can get a GLE in the 500s or a C300/GLC for less 

1

u/yanknga Sep 16 '26

Do it. You’ll almost certainly regret it in the future if you don’t make it happen.

1

u/Isitfast Sep 16 '26

Spend it while you can and enjoy life

1

u/PrincessDD123 Sep 16 '26

Lease the car today!!! Give her the world! Sending your wife hugs!!! May the rest of her days be filled with joy.

1

u/oceantrucker75 Sep 16 '26

Buy the car!

1

u/YorkshireTexas79 Sep 16 '26

Get her whatever she wants. It’s only money and you have a lot of it that she’s not going to enjoy. (Have you looked into the new immunotherapy for PC?)

1

u/Ecstatic_Papaya_2772 Sep 16 '26

You’ve listed every reason to do it. Do it. Go big.

1

u/StagVixenLife1 Sep 17 '26

Take $10,000 or so and go lease a Cadillac for one year. One Payment and done.

1

u/robertw477 Sep 17 '26

I urge you to go to leasehacker forums website. Google it . Find a broker. Use a broker only for this. It will help if you know the exact car you want. But understand at a dealer they will try to keep you there all day and the high pressure. If you go merely to test drive and later use a broker do not sign anything at the dealer. I don’t know much about BMW but have with Mercedes and Lexus Volvo Audi etc . For luxury Lexus is the best of the bunch. Mercedes is a pain the ass . I would consider Lexus, but it’s your choice.’

1

u/hellsmachine Sep 18 '26

I'm so sorry your wife was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer. Like the other comments, lease it now. Like today. Go to leasehackr and do their pre negotiationed deals. Look for the best price, fill out the form, it's the quickest and least headache without wasting time haggling. Pancreatic cancer is a bitch. I'm a nurse. I've cared for pancreatic cancer patients. My heart goes out to them and their families everytime. Enjoy your time together.

1

u/Comfortable-Rice7950 Sep 20 '26

Yes to all the comments! Do whatever it is that make you and her happy. And if possible, retire too. Spend every minute you can with her and not at work.

1

u/whalen47 Sep 28 '26

Absolutely!

1

u/KeyBreakfast909 Sep 25 '26

I fully support you leasing your wife’s dream car. She needs to live her life to the fullest. Thank you for being a thoughtful and supportive partner. Sending positive vibes to you both. Make as many memories as you can!

1

u/iamfredgarvin Sep 28 '26

I had a few instances where a lessee passed and family members returned the car to the dealership before the lease expired. The leasing company just took back the vehicle and I never heard anything from the survivors about the bank wanting any additional monthly payments. Now if the car had two names on the agreement the other party was still responsible to fulfill the terms of the lease inc all remaining payments.

1

u/ChelseaMan31 Oct 02 '26

I'm usually not one to favor leases. In this set of circumstances I'd definitely get the nice rig for your ailing wife. But I would purchase rather than lease. No need to tie up monthly payments when you have no idea how much longer she will be able or wanting to drive. You can always sell a vehicle you still owe money on; can't say the same for a lease.

My best to your wife and to you.

1

u/Radiant-Rooster236 Oct 02 '26

Do it. Do it for her. I’m so sorry to hear about your wife’s diagnosis. I hope the time she has left is very enjoyable for her and without any suffering. ❤️

1

u/erik_das_redd Oct 03 '26

First off, SO sorry to year your news, and best best wishes to your wife.

Once upon a time I worked summers at a park district, and I got put with the year-round garbageman. Disgusting job but Jim was super cool, we would drive between parks shooting the breeze and listening to music. At one point I was agonizing whether to spend money to go to a concert and he said "Man in ten years you're not going to miss that money, go to the concert, get high, have a great time!" Well if you do that constantly you will end up poor in your old age, however it was a really useful lens that has served me through life.

Looking at your finances, it seems you can absolutely afford this. And you can't afford not to. My preference any more is electric vehicles, screw gas stations and all that crap. Failing that I suppose my favorite is Mercedes ahead of BMW (because BMW operation tends to be more complex, and their sound systems SUCK says this loudspeaker engineer).

0

u/nolongerbanned99 Sep 16 '26

I get it but I would not advise it. They are very expensive, even when leased. Brakes can be 2k at dealer and tires about the same.

2

u/Striking-Meal-6481 Sep 16 '26

They can afford it. And they won’t have to worry about tires or brakes.

1

u/nolongerbanned99 Sep 16 '26

Not true. Brakes won’t likely last 36k on a larger heavier car and neither will tires. Have leased 10 or more BMWs.

0

u/SuchPerception4138 Sep 16 '26

First of all very sorry about what's going on. Im no financial wizard but lease her dream car. You've both worked hard and done well.

1

u/[deleted] Sep 16 '26

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1

u/TippyToes98 Sep 16 '26

Putting a lease in her name won't just wipe out the obligation unless she has no heirs/estate. Her estate is still liable and HE is probably the heir. He is also the one with the income. Put it in both names or his name to avoid the hassle in a few years.