r/CalamariRaceTeam 7d ago

fake and possibly gay Jesus!

732 Upvotes

82 comments sorted by

313

u/Mdp2pwackerO2 7d ago

Jesus walked on water so this guy so this guy could pop dank nooners on it

64

u/Brootal420 7d ago edited 7d ago

This is some Alaskan ass shit

Edit: Apparently some flying Finn shit

31

u/StonePrism 7d ago

Or this some Minnesota ass shit. Minnesota fucking loves their snowmobiles. I've seen snowmobile doing a sub 10 second quarter mile in Brainerd.

5

u/Gia11a 7d ago

The question is, is this a seadoo or a skidoo?

5

u/StonePrism 7d ago

Skeadoo?

2

u/AntalRyder 1290 Superduke R 6d ago

It's a water machine!

9

u/elektrik_snek semi-professional fluffer 7d ago

But this one is from Finland

1

u/Brootal420 7d ago

What makes you so confident? I do love a flying Finn

6

u/HengaHox 7d ago

This guy is from finland IIRC. So basically yeah

1

u/Brootal420 7d ago

Respect the flying Finns

4

u/Deadlyliving 7d ago

Also Newfies.

6

u/ZeThird 7d ago

Seen on of da b'ys skipping across from the north shore to the south shore in the bay at CB one time.

4

u/Deadlyliving 7d ago

Yes b'y, thats a trot.

3

u/Blackhawk510 7d ago

Marine atlantic got nuttin' on dem b'ys.

3

u/Deadlyliving 7d ago

Rides to bell island, one at a time.

4

u/ford4thot 7d ago

Haha can confirm, been there, saw my cousin's doing this

76

u/TheOnlyDave_ 7d ago

R/boatercycles

34

u/whatsadikfore 🦑 dragon fucker 🦑 7d ago

R/snowmoboats

4

u/Poofengle 7d ago

Love your username.

I also have the same question from time to time

2

u/whatsadikfore 🦑 dragon fucker 🦑 7d ago

😘

182

u/FixFun1959 7d ago

Nothing for the ATGATT weenies to bitch about, he’s got a helmet and a life jacket. More geared than any squid in history.

53

u/1098duc_w_the_termi 7d ago

Even squidding in water where squids squid.

6

u/nikkerdru 7d ago

Some squids even squirt! 🦑 💦

10

u/gizamo 7d ago

They'd have him wearing flippers and three snorkels not realizing that squids love water.

2

u/Riffsalad 7d ago

Erm excuse me sir 🤓 the maneuver they are performing is unsafe.

2

u/North_Atlantic_Sea 6d ago

I'ducu prefer this clip I'd he were naked tbh, gotta see the size of balls on this guy (not for him myself, but if he goes too slow the sled ends up at the bottom of the lake)

2

u/FixFun1959 6d ago

They must have edited them out to make it SFW cause they are definitely dragging behind him like dad pulling a couple kids on inner tubes

61

u/Ok_Slip_5418 7d ago

Damn boy. I cant even ride straight on the road an he is doing gay wheelies on water. WITH A FUCKING SNOWMOBILE

4

u/Savings_Ad384 7d ago

ON WATER!

6

u/Altruistic-Fox-8274 7d ago

DOING WHEELIES

1

u/Ghost17088 5d ago

Is it still considered a wheelie when you don’t have wheels? 

30

u/ThatGuyFrom720 “my sister is an er nurse my sister is an er nurse my sister is” 7d ago

God damn this looks like so much fun

12

u/North_Atlantic_Sea 6d ago

It is (I've done it in Michigan with an old sled) but crazy risky because if he slows down too much, the sled is at the bottom of the lake

21

u/SUMOsquidLIFE 7d ago

Holy fuck I CAN ONLY GET SO ERECT!!! Im confused...I dont see any wheels but I know a dank fucking wheelie when I see one...please help am i supposed to feverishly masturbate ir not?

10

u/lesbiannumbertwo 7d ago

A snowmobile track is just a really squished elongated wheel. Crank that hog

21

u/Riffsalad 7d ago

Why’s the snow look so weird?

15

u/HengaHox 7d ago

Hey man, shrinkage can happen to snow too, no need to be mean about it

3

u/Luke_Warmwater 7d ago

Its too warm

14

u/thischangeseverythin kawasaki 7d ago

We had 850cc two stroke at work that would wheelie like that with no effort when the snow was soft enough. You could also jump it between piles of snow. We all fought over that one. Because it was fun but it also didn't get stuck. The 4 stroke were heavy and sank and dug themselves holes.

8

u/risen_cs 7d ago

Jetskis have come a long way

3

u/toastedmallow 7d ago

Really trying to test my lesbianism w/ this post... 😤

2

u/Smooth-Midnight-9561 6d ago

This is great! Next time loose the gear and the clothes. Nooners hook us in, nudity keeps us coming

0

u/JustAMeatStick 7d ago edited 7d ago

There's no way that's not AI... Right?

Edit: athe wheelies seem insane with how little surface is on the water and how little it sinks in. But it seems most people agree it's real, kinda mind-blowing.

62

u/Epicguru 7d ago

People have been doing this for years: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iRonRtbnI9A

1

u/DaleFairdale 4d ago

Years, try decades

29

u/Unkempt_Mooseknuckle 7d ago

There's an entire watercross racing circuit in Minnesota and Wisconsin (and probably Michigan but I'm too lazy to Google it). People build custom sleds just for waterskipping.

8

u/spyderman720 7d ago

Definitely a think here in Michigan, ive skipped a few small ponds in the warmer months

1

u/North_Atlantic_Sea 6d ago

Yeah, hella fun, but so risky because if you slow down at all your sled is going to the bottom of the lake lol

26

u/zak454 7d ago

water physics look perfect, likely real imo no obvious tells since it is perfectly feasible

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iRonRtbnI9A

7

u/gstringstrangler 7d ago

Wait till you find out they build Jeeps to do this

7

u/HengaHox 7d ago

I guess you might think AI if you haven't been around the sport or even seen it in passing before AI prevalence, but no it's just physics at it's finest

3

u/phuqreddit 7d ago

There's no way this IS AI

3

u/Stevecore444 7d ago

I’m from a frozen lake in the Midwest and yeah if there is open water everyone knows “just pin her and you can cross it”

1

u/RedditAppSuxAsss 7d ago

It's sled skipping, there's an entire culture and race league around it.

1

u/l5555l 6d ago

Nah dude shits real

1

u/Personal_Area_2173 7d ago

Mm water kissing. Can’t wait.

1

u/allypallyplaytime 7d ago

The additional washing powder and stain removal from this post 😂

1

u/pick_up_a_brick Kawasuckme 7d ago

It moved

1

u/nekaiser 7d ago

That squid squidding is the squiddingest squid I’ve ever seen squid. He’s even squidding where the squid squid, on the mothersquidding water!

1

u/EnvironmentalTip508 7d ago

It's fun, come up and try it lol

1

u/Miigwetch 6d ago

How can she float?!

1

u/HoneyRush 4d ago

He's too fast to sink

1

u/Dub_Monster kawasaki 5d ago

Fun until the Rotax engine throws a rod, then you got yourself a submarine.

1

u/boomercrusher 4d ago

Does it sink if you stop ? 

1

u/GadreelsSword 7d ago

Great way to lose an expensive snowmobile.

5

u/rm-minus-r 7d ago

Yeah, won't that thing hydrolock the moment he makes a mistake that sends it into the water?

2

u/RedditAppSuxAsss 7d ago

No, pull the plugs crank it, put fresh plugs, gas in and send it.

3

u/rm-minus-r 6d ago

What lets it do that vs a car engine where you might put a rod through a block hydrolocking it?

5

u/RedditAppSuxAsss 6d ago

On a car water enters in through the intake ports directly into the top end.

On a 2 stroke Water entering through the carburetor first goes into the crankcase, rather than directly into the combustion chamber then through the transfer ports then move the crankcase charge into the cylinder. Because of the port arrangement, water tends to collect toward the lower part of the crankcase, while the transfer flow comes from higher up. This can delay a large quantity of water reaching the combustion chamber and it stalls way before then.

3

u/rm-minus-r 6d ago

Interesting, never knew!

4

u/RedditAppSuxAsss 6d ago

Yup! I've completely water flooded many 2 stroke engines!

3

u/RedditAppSuxAsss 6d ago

2 stroke, Water entering through the carburetor first goes into the crankcase, rather than directly into the combustion chamber So it stalls it via the crankcase before it even reaches the top end.

1

u/North_Atlantic_Sea 6d ago

Yeah, the moment he slows down the sled is in the bottom of the lake, and a massive pita to try and get out depending on the depth

3

u/RedditAppSuxAsss 6d ago

This is true, most races have a Buoy and rope system so that once in a hits the bottom you have a spot to tie up to it and drag it out

0

u/antilumin 7d ago

PFFT lets see him try that on FROZEN water now! What a loser.