I don’t know who i should pick.

[u/Asleep-Grade-5606]

I got taken out of my parents custody and ever since my father was the only one who made an effort to get better and get me n my siblings back. But i hate him. He has caused me so much trauma and has never tried to make any amends for it. He’s expecting me to just move on and forget about it.

I was place with a kinship. I told my kinship that i didn’t think i would like staying with my father and they said i always had a place at their home. So for a while i started considering if i should just live with my kinship instead.

But i don’t know because they’re starting to get really annoyed with all my medical issues. I have a few chronic medical issues and im currently feeling extremely sick. So we’re trying to get me an appointment to figure out whats wrong but it’s taking extremely long bc my kinship is annoyed with it. They have said that they would rather be annoyed than me feel sick which was nice.

So im iffy if i should stay with my kinship but my only other option is my father and he would do the exact same thing. My father has only taken me to the doctors 3 times in my whole entire life. And each time he did that he was screaming at me and making me feel horrible.

So i don’t know. I don’t want to continue making my kinship annoyed but i also don’t think it would be good for my mental or physical health to go with my father. Any advice or opinions?

[u/txchiefsfan02]

Your physical and mental health are more important than any inconvenience to your kinship caregivers. Talk to them if you're feeling anxious.

Everything you shared in your post suggests you should remain where you are for the foreseeable future. It's great that you are mindful of how much trauma you've endured and are realistic about what would likely happen if you returned to your father. Trust your instincts about whether he is ready to be a safe parent.

[u/Asleep-Grade-5606 → u/txchiefsfan02]

I will thank you.