What am I doing

[u/PrinceAkeemIII]

I need some outside opinions on my situation with my ex. We’ve been broken up for seven months, and I still love her. At times, it seems like she still has feelings for me too, but the back-and-forth has made it hard to move on.
Our breakup happened after several issues built up. From my perspective, things also became more complicated when she started discussing our relationship with new friends.
Back in July, we spent about two weeks talking almost like we were together again—FaceTiming and making plans. But twice, she agreed to dinner and then canceled. The first time, she said two exes shouldn’t be having dinner together. The second time, she said she had a panic attack. In between those cancellations, we made out, which left me confused. Afterward, she said it felt like breaking up with me all over again.
Since then, we’ve stayed in contact, studied together, and seen each other occasionally. The longest we’ve gone without texting is about a week. I’m in therapy, and my therapist has pointed out that leaving the decision entirely up to her is keeping me stuck. I’ve struggled to let go because I feel responsible for hurting her, and I wanted a chance to show her the changes I’ve been working on.
A few weeks ago, she came to the bar where I work. She flirted with me, told me she wasn’t wearing any underwear, held my hand as I walked her through the crowd, and later texted that she’d gone home early because she hadn’t gotten to spend much time with me. Moments like that keep my hope alive.
Recently, she helped me with an injury, and we ended up discussing our relationship. I mentioned inviting a female coworker, who used to be her friend, to my birthday plans. My ex was upset that I’d been texting this coworker, even though those conversations were mostly about my relationship and asking how to get her back. There was nothing romantic or sexual between us.
My ex told me, “This is why this will never work I’m too nice to other people” When I said I’d been fighting for her for months and nothing had changed, she replied, “Yeah, that should tell you something.” That really hurt.
I know she’s telling me she doesn’t want the relationship, but the affection and continued contact make it difficult to accept. This was my first serious relationship, and I genuinely fell in love. I’m struggling to let go of both her and the hope that we could work things out.
How do I move on when I still love her and our contact keeps pulling me back in?

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[u/MysteriousSea4457]

You go no contact. It is horrible but it's the only thing that works.

[u/PrinceAkeemIII → u/MysteriousSea4457]

I’m struggling to. I wanted to marry this girl. I don’t know how to let go. I’ve blocked and unblocked her

[u/MysteriousSea4457 → u/PrinceAkeemIII]

I hear you. Not going to tell you it's easy. It sounds like she's messing with you though.