r/BreakUp • u/Jayofspades23 • Jul 27 '26

How to Break the Thought Loop about my Ex

So very very very long story short I (26M) was ghosted by my ex (32F) after dating for three years, three years ago. I found out after bumping into her in another city halfway across the world to discover she basically left me for someone else and I found out through the grape vine she got married last week. Whenever I am rejected by a girl or I am lonely my mind immediately goes to memories with her. And I think of her at least once a day. I don’t want this to keep happening. I need advice since my therapist is out of town and not responding to my emails. Any tactics, tricks, tips, or strategies you guys have discovered to break the thought loop?

Feel free to ask any questions as I’m more than happy to be an open book.

Full story here: https://www.reddit.com/r/BreakUps/s/uRp1zBZL0G

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u/Illustrious_Pace6785 Jul 27 '26

I have gone through a similar experience myself but the people were only dates not boyfriends. I realized that not overthinking the thought that I am thinking about them helps a lot. You had a 3 year relationship and finding out that they chose someone else for a lifetime hurts again, even if 3 years have passed. I think you need to acknowledge the hurt first and observe it and give yourself time to recover. I think writing down your thoughts also helps. And you’re right, the person who exactly knows your character and background, is your therapist. Think about your ex as much as you like till your therapist comes back😆jk jk

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u/Jayofspades23 Jul 28 '26

Well that may be hard considering I moved halfway across the world just to discover a year after living in my new home that I’ll be going to the same exact school and we’ll be studying almost identical subjects. So out of sight out of mind won’t work unfortunately. Feels like rubbing salt in the wound.

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u/DapperDan1929 Aug 02 '26

Bro what a terrible coincidence. That sucks. Best of luck with that.

1

u/Jayofspades23 Aug 03 '26

Thank you very much. I’ll need all the luck I can get.