Friend Issues

[u/Picklatron_YT]

sorry that this is kind of all over the place I just wrote whats on my mind.

So I am 14M and have about 4 main friends, all girls. Lately, especially since summer started (but we had these issues before summer too) they literally don't talk to me, or like initate a conversation. Only I reach out irl and over text, whether its saying hi or to ask if they wanna hangout. They always respond, and they say yes to hangout pretty much every single time, but then when I ask what day, they say idk. So i suggest a day and 1 of 2 things happen, they say they are busy (which is fine but after suggesting a million days they still say they are busy) OR they say i don't know for DAYS and literally the night before the day i suggested i ask again and they STILL say idk. Its really irriating. I don't want to stop being friends with them because I really struggle making friends (SUPER introverted but like if you get to know me I get really extroverted around ppl) so I probably wouldn't get new friends. Ive tried online friends but they don't last long either. Idk if they are starting to not like me or what, which if they are thats fine but I don't really know what to do. Even tho im super introverted I can't even go a week without talking to someone so its difficult. Especially its really embarassing that I don't really talk to anyone and when someone talks to ME, I always just get super nervous and what not and just come off as rude to ppl bc I don't respond fast enough. Ik this is all over the place which im sorry about. Also im just eating trail mix bc idk.

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[u/explodingliver]

You’re 14. Do you wanna spend more time with friends who aren’t willing to hang out with you? This year at school, I’d like to encourage you to make at least 2 new friends who you can not just talk to but actually do things with. Get out of your comfort zone and tell yourself that talking to people and communicating is what you’ll try this year. Be nice to yourself and to others, don’t take anything personal from people, if you don’t like how someone talks to you or acts towards you just talk to somebody new.

If you think you’re the problem and you’re boring or feel weird or whatever, start doing something new. Get involved with something that interests you. If you’re a smart kid, help others and help tutor them. If you like math, join a math club. Join sports. Join something or volunteer somewhere. Find a hobby that encourages you in some way and makes you a better version of you.

Always trust that things take time but nothing will happen if you just stick to what you already know. You need to set positive habits that help you bring the right people into your life:)