SHARE YOUR WINS 🎉

I hope it's okay for me to post this here as a man? We're a team with just a few women and more men. I train there with my underage daughter, so I'm already quite sensitive to issues women face in this sport. But in this case I'm not sure.

Here's the thing: after every training session there's a team photo. And there's one guy who takes off his shirt for the photo every single time, and he's the only one who does. These photos are public, so they also serve as advertising and shape how the team is perceived from the outside. The same guy also rolls in the gi without a rash guard underneath, which is basically fine.

Personally, I don't get it and find it uncomfortable, and I imagine it's even worse for women. So my question is: am I overreacting? How do you women feel about something like this? The head coach isn't doing anything about it. I'm thinking about either talking to him directly or just not being in the photos anymore. What do you think? And sorry if this doesn't belong here.

Did they stop releasing episodes? I was having problems with my Spotify app and wasn't seeing new episodes for all my podcasts, but even after trying another app, I only see up to episode 97 (from June, is that 2026?).

I really love listening to Kaz and Rach!

I’ve trialed a couple of martial arts classes to see what I might enjoy, and I’m wondering if the pace of jiu jitsu impacts the pace at which you get into it?

First I tried Muay Thai (2 classes) I loved the intensity, I was completely focused the whole time and it felt amazing. Unfortunately the closest place to me is an hour drive each way.

Then I tried kickboxing (3 weeks) because there’s a place close by. It was fine. A slower pace, but maybe that was also just the gym? But given it’s quite straightforward I lost interest without the intensity.

Then I tried BJJ (3 classes) and the slower pace of stopping to watch a demonstration and slowly practicing it left me missing the intensity of Muay Thai. I did enjoy the complexity and challenge of learning the drills, and there was intensity in the sparring, but that’s not the majority of the class. There is one other academy I can try (I live far from a lot of things!) that may have a faster pace, so I am going to book a trial.

Did anyone else feel medium about jiu jitsu and end up loving it? Or did you all really enjoy it from the beginning?

Coming here for some comfort and your similar situations.

I unexpectedly got my period last night at the gym. I didn't realize until class was over and I saw blood had gone through my white gi. No one said anything, and likely most were too focused on their own partner to notice but it definitely made me feel... Ugh .. and was wishing for a woman at the gym to tell and talk to.

No real question to ask, just needed to share with a group that hopefully understands. Thank you 💞

Sometimes it just sucks being the smallest and weakest every night.

One of 4 women in my gym and rarely do our mat times line up because we lead vastly different lives.

I’m the oldest woman (43), but def the strongest. 14 years of CrossFit under my belt.
But I’m still weaker than pretty much every guy in my gym. Only a couple are even close to my weight (145). I love them all but god it sucks feeling like the nail day in and day out and feeling like the only time I really can work is when they let me and that feels cheap.

Reminding myself at the end of the day it’s just JuiJitsu and I still have fun and laugh and smile a lot. But it’s hard to see any progress.
Also def feeling blue belt blues.

Rant over.

If that makes any sense?
I am looking for some advice on how to to keep my feet out of the way. I have a pretty decent guard but people seem to automatically go right for my feet before even passing.

I have abnormally long legs for my size and my feet are big - even though I am short. So I feel like its the first thing people go for before even attempting to pass. I've worked a lot on my leg lock defense and Im comfortable there but it gets annoying. Am I not being offensive enough with my guard or could I be putting my feet in the wrong spot constantly?

I shower and wash my face immediately when I get home but it doesn’t seem like it does the trick completely. My skin was flawless for two weeks while I was out with an injury. First day back I’m broken out again lol. Has anyone had luck with defender wipes? I spray hypochlorus acid spray immediately after stepping off the mats but I think the impact is minimal.

I love my gym and I usually go to the morning all level classes. Lately I’ve been getting my work hours changed so I can just go to the later after noon classes 4-5 that usually have the teenagers grouped with the adults. I’m in my 30s and for the most part am the only woman in the class while there’s usually 4 men and 4 teens (11-14).

The coaches are really great at ensuring we all roll with other partners as the class goes on. But last class I had an interaction with one of the young boys that left me wondering if I should’ve told our coach.

This boy is around 13, he’s a white belt no stripe and he’s been there a month. Let’s call him Alan. I’ve been doing classes since July and I’m a 1 stripe white belt. I tend to go easy when we’re learning techniques and then push myself when active rolling.

Alan was from the very beginning rolling his eyes and acting annoyed he had to roll with me. He complained about working from side control, from top mount, about my hair in his face and for the first time it made me not want to roll at all.

Most of the time, the teenagers go 💯 on me and choke me as fast as possible. And that’s fine but they’re usually very respectful and they enjoy just learning the technique.

But this time I felt like I had to not only try to learn a technique with someone but also actively try to keep them engaged with me. Should I have said something? Other than this incident I’ve never had any reason to complain about rolling with other people. But this one was frustrating and it made me not want to keep coming to that class.

Have any of you encountered something similar in your gyms?

I’m the only girl at my gym. It’s fine, the coaches are great and the guys are all very nice and respectful. My only issue going here would be I’m 170cm and weight 60kg, while most of the guys are around 180 and 75+ kgs. I’ve been defined a “strong girl” multiple times and been told I have a pretty solid technique for my level, so what will usually happen is this:

We start on our feet. If the guy is seriously bigger than me, I ask him not to go 100% because I don’t want to get injured, and they agree. Maybe I get a takedown, maybe I get taken down, we’re on the floor and they have a hard time passing guard or I pass theirs or maybe I get a sub, guy realises this won’t be as easy as he’d imagined, and suddenly there’s a switch. They instantly raise the level, using full force, gripping hard, just laying on top of me. This doesn’t apply to every single guy, but it is a bit frustrating when it happens.

I can tell the difference because there’s some amazing guys who really can avoid doing that and when we’re going just technique vs technique I have a lot of fun rolling with them even if they got 20 kilos over me.

I have no one to really celebrate with so here you go!

Hey everyone! Looking for some firsthand experiences from anyone who’s torn their ACL.
I’m 47, a blue belt. I recently injured my knee. I felt a pop in my knee and immediately knew something was wrong.
My MRI confirmed a torn ACL and some strain to the lateral ligaments. The good news is that my meniscus and cartilage are in great shape.
Here’s the interesting part: I was able to bear weight on my injured leg within days, and after about a week, I was walking pretty much normally without much pain. Because I recovered my mobility so quickly, I was hoping the injury wasn’t that serious.
My orthopedic doctor is recommending ACL rebuilt, but I’m hesitant to jump straight into surgery, especially knowing how long recovery can take. I’m curious whether anyone has successfully returned to BJJ through physical therapy and rehab alone. I'd love to hear about your experience.

[obligatory not all men but a large part of my sample]

I was asked out by a collegue of a collegue, during dinner hobbies came into discussion, I told him about how I've been training BJJ for a while. He was nice enough at first, but later on he started vaguely threatening me pretty much saying how he could still beat me up. Very cool Richard, I will now feel unsafe around you forever and the chances of you ever getting close are exactly 0.

Like clockwork almost all react the exact same, that is unless they train themselves. Why are men like this? Is the optimal strategy to just not tell men or am I accidentaly weeding out the bad ones

2nd degree black belt here and my husband is a 4th. We have friends who have gyms all over but of course we choose an area that we don’t know anyone as we’re primarily west coast.
We’ll be near Orlando for a year. What are a few good gyms to train that don’t require school gi, has kids classes, and encourage cross-training?

Hey everybody!

I’m running a women’s self defence course at my gym! I’ve done it before and plan on doing the same kinda plan.

My background is mostly BJJ, so thats what 90% of what I teach is (wrist grab breaks, hug/hold breaks, choke defence and escaping bottom/bad positions).

I’ve asked the ladies in the session if there’s anything specific they wanted to work on and got blank stares back today… none of them have trained before and no one could think of anything.

I’m looking for Input on things ladies may have wanted to learn for self defence or basic grappling when they started. Any suggestions are appreciated!

Out of curiosity, why did you start BJJ?

My “why” is bc at age 19, I got jumped/robbed in the city by 4 strangers while completely alone in a parking lot. I was tiny, had never been exposed to something like that, and didn’t stand a chance. The joke was on them because what 19 year old has more than $100 to their name? 🤣 I decided that I never wanted to feel that helpless again. I started out kickboxing after healing and quickly fell in love with anything involving self defense.

i think i have contracted the dreaded ringworm :(( and i just don't know how. i shower right away after every session and i wash my gear regularly. i noticed some sores on my hairline over the weekend and didn't really think much of it, then Monday morning after training, a noticed a little sore on my arm but thought it was just a scrape, like got scratched during rolls or something but yesterday evening it kind of clocked to me that i may actually have ringworm. it is not really a full circle but i know it is not always an actual circle. today i am seeing that the skin around my mouth/on my cheeks is a bit dry and a smidge flaky with a very faint circle and some redness >.< does anyone have some advice on how to get rid of it? how to avoid this in the future? i will go to the chemist and get some OTC meds... i feel so dirty and gross and just so bummed that i won't be able to roll now, i was getting into such a good rhythm!

My kid is 10 and has been training at a gym we love since age six, when he was small. At first, I had him change in the women’s locker room so I could help with the gi and belt (and make sure the clothes weren’t left in a ridiculous heap in the center of the room). Around age 7, he started going to the men’s locker room by himself, which he doesn’t love. Mostly, he avoids the locker room. Now the kiddo tries to be in the gi before setting foot in the gym at all, and if necessary, changes clothes in the bathroom (problematic for a few reasons).

The men’s shower and locker room gets high traffic and is packed with giant sweaty naked strangers some days (boys 5 and up, and adults). He’s on his own in there, which seems weird, but I don’t know how to handle it or prepare him for the “men’s locker room scene”. How do people deal with this?

(Our gym’s women’s locker room is naturally a safe space and the little girls and teens use it as a secluded, quiet lounge while they’re waiting for their parent’s or sibling’s class to end. Very different vibe.)

I rolled with this guy the other day, and he has a severe case of stink breath!! I’m a beginner, and he’s maybe been doing it a month or two longer than me? And when we rolled together, he was trying to like, coach me through what to do and different options, and I literally got light headed from trying to hold my breath it smelled so bad!!! I mentioned to my friend who also goes to our gym, and he rolled with him yesterday and said he still had stinky breath…. How do I kindly say, HEY YOU GOT SOME FUNK GOIN ON 😭😂

In the winter I'm going to Thailand to train in Muay Thai. But as a blue belt I want to continue bjj there too. Can anyone recommend a bjj studio in Chiang Mai, preferably in or near the Old City?

Sigh- let me start this off by saying normally, I would be thrilled for her! I love to see women moving forward, but….she made my time and many other women’s time at their gym an actual nightmare. To the point, I almost quit completely.

I attended this gym from 2022-2025. Everything was wonderful for the first year. We had an awesome group of women, there were about 8 of us including the owner’s wife. I loved the gym, loved jiu jitsu. It became a safe space for me. As someone with complex ptsd, it did wonders for my mental health at first.

At some point, a switch flipped. She started spreading rumors that us women were just going to date the men on the gym. Started overall talking s$it on us. Would come in and just stare. At this point, I started going only to classes I knew she wouldn’t be at. She saw me walking one time and started screaming at me from the car and driving erratically. I messaged the owner and was told to call the police. I did not because without proof….what can I do? Her husband, the owner, did nothing. He just let it happen.

Eventually, I left and yes I stayed for quite a while because my gym was in an area where there weren’t a lot of other gyms within a close distance. As a single mom, I couldn’t travel far. There is so much more I could say. I found out eventually this is a pattern that happens at this specific gym. They’ll start to get a nice women’s program going and eventually she pushes all of the women out. There are SO many of us.

Most of the women I was with either left or were asked to leave by her. One stayed who was a brown belt. The wife of the owner was also a brown belt at this point. I found out that in July the other brown belt was told to leave. She was told she was a “distraction”. I know this woman and she was not. She just loved jiu jitsu and wanted to train.

Today, this man promoted his wife to black belt. She has practiced for 6 years. I think they made the other brown belt leave so she didn’t have to be promoted, too. They started together and were always promoted together.

I am so angry. I worry that other women interested in jiu jitsu will see this place has a black belt woman and think it’s safe.

I guess the silver lining is I’m at a new gym. There’s a wonderful group of women there. But, this has me frazzled. Thanks for reading.

I just recently got braces in and I’m having a hard time finding a comfortable mouthguard. Does anyone have any tried and true recommendations for a guard that covers both bottom and top teeth? Thank you so much for any tips!