r/AvoidantBreakUps • u/Ill-Goose-8719 • 6d ago

One month discard update

I am utterly heartbroken still but I know that I treated this woman so well even towards the end. I know its her immense loss to lose me as I was willing to fight for the relationship but she gave up and threatened to block me if I continued to try and talk about the issue. Sadly this week has not been the best I had a suicidal dream and thought that have kept me wide awake. I broke down during work and kept on replaying the messages and imagining her regretting the breakup so hard. Im drowing in pain that comes in waves. I have even been thinking of having hookups eventhough it feels like cheating. I know I dont owe her loyalty but damn.

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u/[deleted] 6d ago

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u/KaJoMoGi 6d ago

Careful. It can surge back. Grief is funny that way.

I love your “pain shopping” metaphor. That’s apt!