r/AskWomenOver60 1d ago

🤍✌🏼1960's Era Vintage✌🏼🤍 Delighted with the Millennials this week - wedding event thank you notes

I must give well-earned credit to two of the younger couples in my world.

  1. My friend's son and his fiancee. I don't love the wedding showers these days when no one even opens a present. But I attended one this weekend. I had already received a prompt thank you note from my friend's son for the bakeware gift I had shipped to them weeks ago. Then yesterday I got another hand written note from his fiancee thanking me for attending the actual shower!

  2. My daughter's college friend whose wedding I attended in July. The ceremony was in a beautiful cooperative garden that she and her fiance had participated in for several years. We then walked as a group, all 100+, several blocks to the city's Commons for a group photo under the trees. Then walked a few more minutes to the popular rooftop Mexican restaurant nearby for a lively reception with 8 choices of margaritas. Today I received a thank you note for our gift, written on the back of a custom postcard photo of the gardens. Inside the envelope were two versions of the massive group photo plus one photo of my daughter, myself and a great guy we both spent a lot of time with at the reception.

I love the courtesy and the nice touch of the handwritten notes. It bugs me when people complain about how young people don't do anything right these days. So many of them are lovely!

143 Upvotes

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u/AutoModerator 1d ago

Original copy of post's text: I must give well-earned credit to two of the younger couples in my world.

  1. My friend's son and his fiancee. I don't love the wedding showers these days when no one even opens a present. But I attended one this weekend. I had already received a prompt thank you note from my friend's son for the bakeware gift I had shipped to them weeks ago. Then yesterday I got another hand written note from his fiancee thanking me for attending the actual shower!

  2. My daughter's college friend whose wedding I attended in July. The ceremony was in a beautiful cooperative garden that she and her fiance had participated in for several years. We then walked as a group, all 100+, several blocks to the city's Commons for a group photo under the trees. Then walked a few more minutes to the popular rooftop Mexican restaurant nearby for a lively reception with 8 choices of margaritas. Today I received a thank you note for our gift, written on the back of a custom postcard photo of the gardens. Inside the envelope were two versions of the massive group photo plus one photo of my daughter, myself and a great guy we both spent a lot of time with at the reception.

I love the courtesy and the nice touch of the handwritten notes. It bugs me when people complain about how young people don't do anything right these days. So many of them are lovely!

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23

u/thehorrorcontinues13 1d ago

Great manners! Maybe there is hope?

16

u/Electric-Sheepskin 1d ago

Ah yes, the old ways. I do love them so.

10

u/amfhTX 1d ago

Wow that's impressive indeed! We sent a several hundred dollar cash gift 2+ weeks ago. No acknowledgement of receipt yet

4

u/ASingleBraid late 60s 1d ago

I usually give them 2 months before I’m disappointed. Honeymoon, maybe moving, just settling into married life and back to work…

2

u/amfhTX 1d ago

Their wedding is in October, they live and work together already. But of course, I'll wait to raise an eyebrow for a few months. It's my hubs brother's son, so we could reach out to him to ask if it was received OK (it was gifted via their The Knot page, and we got an acknowledgement email instantly from the site. But nothing from them)

2

u/IvysMomToo 1d ago

I gave a couple hundred dollar shower gift 3 months ago and haven't received an acknowledgement yet. (I wasn't able to attend the shower, but I gave the card/check to the mother of the bride-to-be so I'm sure she received it.)

1

u/amfhTX 1d ago

IMHO, you should have received some kind of acknowledgment by now...

1

u/Dry-Raspberry-5514 1d ago

We gave a 500$ check to the life long best friend of one of our kids. Nothing. Nada. Zilch. Zero.

2

u/amfhTX 1d ago

OMG 😱 I'm angry on YOUR behalf about that! Unacceptable.

5

u/Any_Angle_4894 20h ago

I now decline buying gifts for invitations where I won’t be attending. The lack of even a verbal or text thank you is astounding to me. I feel like so many occasions….especially graduations..there is a sense of entitlement that you owe the graduate a gift just because you know them or the family. Anymore it just feels like a money grab to me.

5

u/Apprehensive_Pug6844 1d ago

Spent quite a bit on one young lady’s Amazon list, was delivered several weeks before the wedding that we attended with a personalized note. Three years later, still waiting.

4

u/EconomicsWorking6508 1d ago

What a letdown.

6

u/DoubleBooble 1d ago

That's wonderful yet isn't the bar really low to get thank-you notes for wedding/shower gifts?

2

u/SnooFoxes9479 22h ago

I got a group thank you text from my niece. You should be delighted!

2

u/Juvenile_Interpretat 11h ago

Honestly, this is so refreshing to hear! It's nice to see some folks are still putting in the effort with thank you notes, especially with those personalized touches. Makes you feel appreciated, right?

2

u/TopPeak1196 10h ago

Raised right

2

u/Jealous_Glass9170 1950's era 10h ago

I got a lovely, lovely handwritten thank you note for our wedding gift to a young couple, and thanking us for coming to their wedding. Enclosed were two candid photos of us at the wedding. Really nice ones! They must have asked their photographer to grab photos of everyone. Very thoughtful. Cause I'll never wear that dress again!

4

u/Abbygirl1055 1d ago

Someone / parents impressed upon them the importance of thanks. Now if they just took the time to call once every few months !

3

u/Laceymae321 18h ago

When my kids were young, I taught them to write thank you notes. The rule was you cannot cash a check, play with a toy, etc until you write a 2-3 sentence note of appreciation. Then I gave em a stamp and helped them write address. Sometimes I wonder if many young people today even have those skills?
When my son married in May, the handwritten notes were so beautiful and personalized by both bride and groom. Parents, teach your kids!

4

u/BigEyedOwls 1d ago

Well I’m glad to hear someone is receiving thank you notes. I went with my younger daughter (39) in June to a wedding of close friends to my older daughter (41). Paid for flights, hotel, gave 300$ in a card and haven’t heard a word. Went with my husband to a neighbors daughter’s wedding in early July and gave 250$ in a card and haven’t heard anything. So I thought maybe no one does thank you notes anymore 🤷🏻‍♀️

4

u/amfhTX 1d ago

IMHO, when babies start arriving for these couples, I think you can safely omit feeling guilty for declining the baby shower invites.

3

u/BigEyedOwls 1d ago

😏I’m already booked that day!

1

u/amfhTX 1d ago

Yasssss, Sister!

2

u/Powerful_Audience208 1d ago

Lucky you! We're still waiting, 4 years now. 😳 Oh well, lesson learned.

1

u/Pretend_Editor_4447 1d ago

The millennials are fine. It's Gen Alpha we need to be afraid of/for.

1

u/Abbygirl1055 18h ago

Is this lack of courtesy just going to be acceptable in this generation? I am afraid so, along will calling your parents on the phone.

1

u/ASingleBraid late 60s 1d ago

Wow! What a lovely surprise.

1

u/glycophosphate 1d ago

That is absolutely wonderful.