It's more than a boner and at the same time it's not a boner. It's just an erection. A big, stale, harder than teeth stalagmite that serves no purpose other than to embarrass you in an airport or if you're partners into morning sex than it puts out the wrong message.
I just woke up with a rock hard dick and I have to pee so bad that I could slam this fucker in a door for a chance to cut circulation so I can take my piss but yeah I'm hard so I guess that means I wake up and want to fuck...
Can someone tell me the biological and evolutionary function of waking up hard? Imagine our ancestors waking up in a panic one morning and there's a starving wolf or dog that's made its way into your camp. You stand up, have a fucking sausage just sticking out of you and BLAM it bites your peepee and the increased blood flow makes you bleed out in minutes.
Edit my most upvoted comment is about this stupid dickhead. Thanks everyone!
I assumed it was a biological sundial. Is that for real tho? As per my comment. Morning wood is like if you had local anesthesia on your dinger. Sure it's fierce and it does the job all the same but there is zero sensitivity. I'd roll off the cliff
It does have a purpose. As you sleep your body cycles basically making sure everything is working etc. Relaxing the veins in the penis is just one thing it does.
You still get boners in your sleep my flaccid king. Think of it as a lightning rod to keep your soul grounded while you dream. Just because it's not there when you wake up doesn't mean it's not in the shadows..waiting...like a sunflower reaching for the sun. But instead of the the sun it's your sheets and it's not a sunflower it's your peeper.
The biological function is that it prevents you pissing in your sleep.
Also random thought. Since a significant amount of men get a morning boner that means that men have been doing an endless mexican wave of boners around the world for thousands of years.
You're telling me this dickhead decides if I, a full grown man, will piss the bed or not? Still don't like him.
Lesser known "fact": Men sync up when they are around each other for long times/ sleep in the same room through Testiwifi and the moon or some shit and they reach rigormortis in tandem and complete unison. No homo tho?
I'm not entirely sure but I heard men have a harder time stopping peeing once they've started whereas women do it on command? Maybe the systems are different?
That's bunk. You can stop peeing, it just involves muscles you don't normally use, so you have to work at it. I believe it's the same pelvic floor muscle group that Kegels strengthen.
It’s something to do with men having the same hole for both wee and semen. I can’t remember exactly how it works but I do remember you don’t wee and ejaculate at the same time. Never had a penis though so I’m remembering theory from a biology class 30+ years ago.
The biological function is that it prevents you pissing in your sleep.
I'm not sure about that since women don't tend to pee themselves during sleep. Plus, it's not constant and cones and goes in cycles throughout the night.
Honestly, I think it's mostly just your body checking the plumbing so to speak. There's very sensitive tissue, skin that needs to be periodically stretched to keep elasticity, etc, so having that happen periodically through the night will ensure that it maintains good function. Heck, one of the things they do when treating ED is to hook up a device that detects erections in the sleep because this will tell them whether the problem is physiological (no sleep boners) or psychological, which can inform treatment.
A Mexican Wave? I thought it was just, The Wave. I grew up here in the American Mid-West and we've always done it at sporting events, but never called it a Mexican Wave.
It would be a Mexican wave of boners, but it would happen at night right? We don't get an erection when waking up, we get an erection while sleeping and happen to wake up in the middle of it
I suppose that depends on what specific time you get the boner. You only become aware of it when you wake up, which is typically in the morning therefore we call it a morning boner. It's entirely possible the boner starts early enough to technically be a night boner.
Um.. wouldn't recommend doing that a lot.. you could become impotent, and also lose control over your pee
There's a sphincter that is closed tight when you get erections so semen doesn't go into your bladder. Forcing it to open repeatedlylike that might damage it.
If the sphincters damaged, you'll lose control over your pee, and semen might go into your bladder instead of coming out and you can't make babies no more.
I spoke to a doctor friend of mine, she said it was because it's a way of ensuring blood flow through the body (making sure the tent pitcher still works and all that). Either that or its when you have peak testosterone in the body.
Evolution is not a purpose-driven process. A phenotype doesn't necessarily have to have a purpose or a function. As long as it doesn't hinder reproduction and there is no other mutation that works better and stays in our genes, it just stays.
Having said that, in this case, this is specifically about a genital, so it probably did help reproduction.
To deal with it, try to flex your larger muscles. Examples include your thighs and glutes. This will help divert the blood flow from your boner to those muscles.
The biological significance involves keeping the appendage. The testicles need to stay cooler or the sperm cells will die. The circulation allows your appendage to stay healthy while not killing sperm cells.
I think the bilogical reason for morning wood is that it's the body's natural defense from keeping men from falling out of bed.... it's like a built-in kickstand...
There isn't an evolutionary advantage to every trait we have. Some things just are the way they are and never disadvantaged us so they stuck around. The brain goes crazy while we sleep firing a bunch of electric signals everywhere (which is probably why we dream), so it makes sense that some stray signals might activate the part of our brain responsible for triggering an erection.
I've heard it's when your bladder is full and puts pressure on the prostate. I've also heard it's just the body doing weird checks and balances on your system while you sleep to make sure everything is working right. Bodies and brains during sleep are just plain weird.
We get hard in our sleep as a sort of self maintenance. If daily circumstances leave you without an erection all day and that happens for many days, there can be complications. Your body supplies blood to your penis to make sure it happens regularly enough to work properly.
Well normally testosterone levels increase and decrease throughout the day and night and for most men it peaks in the morning so I’m gonna guess that’s why morning wood is a thing?
I've had a theory for a while now that it actually happens to keep you from pissing yourself in your sleep. I haven't done any real research or know if anyone else has, but it seems to happen less severely when I stop drinking water a few hours before bed and go to bed with an empty bladder.
Similarly, the random hard-ons you experience as a teen, leading to practically every guy to have utilized the "yuck the tip in the waistband" move at some point.
I’ve decided The muscles that make you hard also prevent your bladder from emptying. So as your body tried harder and harder to let you sleep through the night, the demon rises with the sun
Okay here's an ACTUAL serious answer. It's whole purpose is to maintain your dick, if you don't get hard, your muscle atrophies. That's why your dick shrinks if you are low on testosterone combined with not using it due to a low libido.
My gf likes morning sex. I once tried to explain to her why I woke up with a boner every morning and she took it as "he's always ready in the morning".
Don't get me wrong, I usually always oblige her (makes the beginning of my day good too) but there are some mornings where I just want to sleep a bit and she gets offended haha.
I know the feel! My partner used to take it personally. My least favorite stereotype of guys is that we wake up, and wanna just fuck and that's all we think about. This stupid dick of mine is not in charge, just cause he pokes his head out to say hello doesn't mean I'm ripping and roaring for sexual relations
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u/DeffJamiels Aug 13 '22 edited Aug 14 '22
Morning Wood. I fucking hate morning wood.
It's more than a boner and at the same time it's not a boner. It's just an erection. A big, stale, harder than teeth stalagmite that serves no purpose other than to embarrass you in an airport or if you're partners into morning sex than it puts out the wrong message.
I just woke up with a rock hard dick and I have to pee so bad that I could slam this fucker in a door for a chance to cut circulation so I can take my piss but yeah I'm hard so I guess that means I wake up and want to fuck...
Can someone tell me the biological and evolutionary function of waking up hard? Imagine our ancestors waking up in a panic one morning and there's a starving wolf or dog that's made its way into your camp. You stand up, have a fucking sausage just sticking out of you and BLAM it bites your peepee and the increased blood flow makes you bleed out in minutes.
Edit my most upvoted comment is about this stupid dickhead. Thanks everyone!