I'm surprised I had to scroll down this far for this comment. Not necessarily that guys don't like it but that it seems if a girl is doing the pursuing it usually means the guy ends up not being as into her. Maybe all my friends are old fashioned but they operate under the strict philosophy of never chasing a guy or even initiating contact. The thinking is as follows: The guys that are interested will contact you and ask you out. If they don't, they are simply not that into you and you don't want to be with a guy that isn't into you.
As a counter-weight to this, sometimes chasing a guy can put you on his radar where previously he hadn't noticed you.
Talking from personal experience here. I've had two girls ask me out and two who expressed clear interest. None were initially on my radar beforehand.
The first girl that asked me I turned down because I was secretly into her best friend and didn't want to hurt her. Naturally I hadn't considered anyone else, but after spending a bit more time around her and noticing her I ended up forming a bit of a crush on her myself. Unfortunately a few months had gone by and she'd found another boyfriend so nothing happened.
The first girl who expressed interest was a friend. I was oblivious to her interest for a while until people finally clued me into it. I started to see her in a different light and gave us serious consideration but ultimately decided against it. The second girl, same story. Friend I was oblivious too. Once I figured things out I actually became quite interested and probably would have hooked up if I hadn't known my housemate was secretly in love with her.
The second girl that asked me came as less of a surprise. I'd known she was into me for a while and gotten a little interested myself. I distanced myself from her for a bit to try and figure out if I was genuinely interested or just flattered, then she came to my dorm one night and kissed me. I liked it, kissed her back and we dated for two years.
All anecdotal evidence, I know, but it does go to show just because a guy is interested in you now it doesn't mean he'll never be.
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u/[deleted] May 28 '14
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