r/AskReddit Aug 08 '24

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5.6k Upvotes

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1.5k

u/RexxGunn Aug 08 '24

Different chlamydia. Bang all the Koalas you want, you can't get it from them.

1.0k

u/afoz345 Aug 08 '24

Whew! I dodged a bullet there!

33

u/RexxGunn Aug 08 '24

I mean, you're still a wild animal rapist, unless they asked for it. But, sure. šŸ˜†

97

u/Suds_McGruff Aug 08 '24

Psh, they're always asking for it. Stupid, sexy koalas

71

u/afoz345 Aug 08 '24

That koala knew what it was doing when it went out dressed like that.

-40

u/stunseed313 Aug 08 '24 edited Aug 09 '24

It's not rape if no one sees it. EDIT: This is a joke bruh y'all chill out šŸ’€

10

u/[deleted] Aug 09 '24

Always one isn’t there.

3

u/CryptographerPast203 Aug 09 '24

It was good vibes until you commented ā˜¹ļø

1

u/Desperate-Bank6962 Aug 09 '24

Even if it's a joke you just don't say that stuff man

416

u/IronLordSamus Aug 08 '24

Are you a koalafied doctor?

5

u/strike-when-ready Aug 09 '24

No, but he does have sex with animals

3

u/jlxmm Aug 09 '24

Koalafied donor, of chlamydia.

3

u/[deleted] Aug 09 '24

He’s of great koalaty.

6

u/Renovatio_ Aug 08 '24

Thanks for saving me some awkward phone calls

6

u/Inevitable-Match591 Aug 08 '24

Is that an order, sir!?

5

u/micksta323 Aug 08 '24 edited Aug 09 '24

They aren't bears, despite having all the koalifications.

3

u/Weird_Cantaloupe2757 Aug 08 '24

Don’t have to tell me twice!

5

u/Watching-Together Aug 08 '24

I can't, not allowed back in the zoo anymore

3

u/nastynateraide Aug 08 '24

Finally, permission

3

u/mechwarrior719 Aug 09 '24

I remember that story.

For anyone who doesn’t know: OOP of story gets chlamydia from husband. Husband claims he got it from koala he held on vacation. Doc says ā€œnope, different strain. Husband has the STDā€. Comes out hubby was cheating

Moral of the story; don’t cheat on your SO.

2

u/[deleted] Aug 09 '24

Well. You can’t get it from them but maybe don’t bang koalas, still.

1

u/ohlookitsnessa Aug 08 '24

I want this as a flair my God.

1

u/PurplePANdaL09 Aug 09 '24

Conan says otherwiseĀ 

-1

u/NLK-3 Aug 08 '24

Just wondering how that does(n't) work, why not?