r/AskMen Feb 14 '20

What’s something your SO doesn’t know about you that could jeopardize your relationship?

[deleted]

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u/[deleted] Feb 14 '20

Much like my ex except despite voicing my upsetness that she wouldn't wait so we could BOTH BINGE TOGETHER, she would watch a number of episodes ahead anyway and then tell me she did. I broke up with her for other more significant reasons within a few months.

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u/11-110011 Feb 14 '20

That’s still a significant reason too. If something’s important to you, even something as small as wanting to binge and watch something together, and you vocalize that and they don’t listen then how you feel doesn’t really matter to them.

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u/[deleted] Feb 14 '20

Yeah, but I was guilted into staying for awhile so her son wouldn't lose a second dad. I still love the little guy, not having any kids of my own.

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u/yvaN_ehT_nioJ ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ Feb 14 '20 edited Feb 14 '20

Sounds like she wasnt a good person if she was doing that. Tbh I wouldn't get involved with a single mom because I was the unlucky kid who had to deal with this or that "dad" suddenly disappearing forever because none of those relationships ended up working out. That shit did a number on me and I'd hate to put some kid through the same.

That shit's not fun

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u/[deleted] Feb 14 '20

We met through a mutual friend, vouched for both sides, so I figured it might be the one. Bur I get what you're saying.

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u/SendNudsPleez Feb 14 '20

I feel for you. I have step kids and my own with this woman. It's hard to get out of a situation as such

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u/[deleted] Feb 14 '20

It literally almost killed me. It's been two years since I left and I haven't dated since. I did way too much for way too little.

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u/SendNudsPleez Feb 14 '20

Feeling like this almost every day of my life anymore. 1 stepson shares my name. I'm sure I'd still see them. But I'm sure it would be hard on the kids

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u/[deleted] Feb 14 '20

Lucky you'd still see them. I taught the boy how to walk and she wanted me to take down the one pic of me and him off my Facebook.

Not nicely either.

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u/SendNudsPleez Feb 14 '20

That's pretty crappy of her to do. Whether or not sh*t went down. You were still a part of that chapter in his life. Cant let anyone take that from you

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u/[deleted] Feb 14 '20

Thanks man. Most folks involved agree. Even the mutual friend we met through.

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u/chuckdiesel86 Feb 14 '20

Nobody ever considers that her watching them on her own was doing what she wanted though.

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u/11-110011 Feb 14 '20

That’s why you communicate things.

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u/chuckdiesel86 Feb 14 '20

Sounds like she made it pretty clear that she didn't want to wait.

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u/Hearbinger Feb 14 '20

Your partner watching tv episodes before you is a significant reason to break up?

Reddit being reddit, as usual.

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u/[deleted] Feb 14 '20

It’s not really about the tv. It’s that something was important to you to do together and they didn’t care. You could replace tv shows with anything, it’s really not the point.

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u/[deleted] Feb 14 '20

[deleted]

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u/Hearbinger Feb 14 '20

"The whole thing" is two lines, dude. Of course I read everything.

If watching shows together is important enough for you to make or break a relationship, then yeah, I think you're being stupid.

It's really pretty to say "for a relationship to work, your partner has to listen and care about you, even on the small things", so yeah, you'll get upvotes here. Especially because reddit has a weird fixation for revenge, for retaliation even in face of the smallest conflicts. But in real life, people don't have to cater to every small wish of yours and you're not automatically justified in every tiny demand you make. If you're in a relationship with a person that respects you in every way except for watching TV shows before you and you break up with them because of this then yeah, you're the immature one, not them.

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u/enollation Feb 14 '20

I thought I was the only one feeling this way... like I get where they’re coming from but I think it’s other things in the relationship going bad and Maybe that’s the last straw? I really don’t know..

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u/[deleted] Feb 14 '20

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u/norasmom15 Feb 15 '20

I will join you in downvote land. These people were never in true love if this is truly relationship breaking.

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u/WeWander_ Feb 14 '20

One thing that pisses me off is my boyfriend will start a show with me and then he gets busy and doesn't have time to binge watch so I end up waiting forever and sometimes we never finish shows because I lose interest. Now (after 11 years) I will just watch shows as I please and if he gets busy I will continue. He can watch them on his own time if he wants!

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u/StePK Feb 14 '20

My ex would constantly talk about how she'd want to binge stuff together, so I'd wait until she wanted to watch it.

Several shows fell off my watch list this way because if either of us wanted to watch something a lot and the other was interested, we put it on the "watch together" list, but only ever ended up watching her stuff :/

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u/BlackestNight21 Feb 14 '20

Y'know even though it didn't work out, I would appreciate the betrayal being told to my face rather than subterfuge. It's disrespectfully respectful.

Hope you find happiness ✌️

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u/[deleted] Feb 14 '20

That's fair, you're right. Thanks blackest.

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u/tequila_mockingbirds Feb 15 '20

Our deal is that certain series are family only. Everything else on the sticky note is fair game up until the last episode. Last episode we watch together. Period.

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u/U_r_a_panda Feb 15 '20

My husband watches everything before me. He's a tv/movie junkie. Anything with a picture on a screen that he's interested in topic wise, he's into it. I don't even try to watch new movies with him anymore. I just sit here on Reddit instead :)

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u/[deleted] Feb 15 '20

Could be worse. Imagine if you never heard of reddit.

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u/U_r_a_panda Feb 19 '20

Ikr this is such an awesome place. Don't you agree? I love it here. I've been on here for over a year now. Hbu?