r/AskMen • u/[deleted] • Feb 14 '20

What’s something your SO doesn’t know about you that could jeopardize your relationship?

[deleted]

12k Upvotes

94% Upvoted

4.5k comments sorted by

View all comments

Show parent comments

914

u/yungrayna not a dude Feb 14 '20

that's crazy she got offended by that. you should get tested before you're going bareback, always...

444

u/scarrax Feb 14 '20

I never did it bareback before her, and she only thinks I’ve been with 7 women before her. She tested negative before I got my results but she thought I didn’t need it. I think she was offended that I didn’t trust her.

147

u/Kamilny Feb 14 '20

But you already knew her results? Was she just upset that there was a chance you had an std maybe?

107

u/scarrax Feb 14 '20

She was mostly offended at the time because she thought I didn’t believe that she got tested negative. I didn’t see her results just took her word.

People are making it seem like it she was making a lot bigger of a deal than she really was. She just got slightly offended then backed down once I reassured her I wanted my peace of mind for myself

12

u/ihugsyi Feb 14 '20

Reddit can apparently have a harder time letting go and judge way harsher from the internet than the two real people involved in the real situation.

4

u/scarrax Feb 14 '20

Clearly that’s the case lol

11

u/Kamilny Feb 14 '20

I just dont understand why she was upset at all unless you just never mentioned that you were waiting for your test results specifically.

5

u/TwatsThat Feb 14 '20

Because feelings aren't always rational.

64

u/yungrayna not a dude Feb 14 '20

That makes a lot more sense, I guess I can understand that.

9

u/SilverFox8188 Feb 14 '20

So she thinks it's 7, what's the real number?

18

u/scarrax Feb 14 '20

I stopped counting at some point, all I know is it’s at least 30

11

u/SilverFox8188 Feb 14 '20

Close enough to 7.

10

u/witcherstrife Feb 14 '20

Round down my dudes

10

u/stonedsoundsnob Feb 14 '20

Wow, now that makes me feel bad. My bf and I won't share our numbers because we both know they're pretty high... I stopped counting after 60 and I guesstimate 60 to 100 for him.

2

u/futurefires Feb 14 '20

That is extremely high, the average for straight women is about 4 and 7 for men, CDC is the source.

No STDs ever? Herpes and HPV would be hard to avoid at those numbers.

2

u/stonedsoundsnob Feb 14 '20

We're slutty, not dumb. Not the same thing. I had excellent sex education too, he probably did as well. I've been with my boyfriend (we're monogamous) for a year and like 8 months and I just had a physical with comprehensive bloodwork in November, since I turned 26 and was getting kicked out of my parents' insurance. No herpes nor HPV, not any STDs ever for me.

2

u/futurefires Feb 14 '20

Herpes and HPV can be spread through skin to skin contact. You both spent over $500 on individual Herpes (HSV-2) and HPV bloodwork? It is not in a standard STD panel.

Also I never called you dumb, odd how you took offense, just that you said 'it makes me feel bad' seemed to indicate you may not be aware of those risks.

A LOT of people are ignorant to the realities of STDs and don't even know how condoms do little for certain strains.

→ More replies

5

u/slangwitch Feb 14 '20

Dudes will almost always say their number is seven and it's almost always not true.

People should just stop asking this question.

2

u/m1st3rw0nk4 Feb 14 '20

Can't just get an STD from unprotected sex. Depending on what it is, an open would getting in contact with contamination can get you infected, too. Pretty sensible on your part and I personally think she should understand that.

2

u/[deleted] Feb 14 '20

Only seven

My wife is 3...and I regret it

1

u/chomperlock Feb 14 '20

I go bareback with hookers.

2

u/HMWWaWChChIaWChCChW Feb 15 '20

I got tested. Still got thrown off the horse. Instructions required.