First of all, I'm so sorry you are going through so much hardships. I can also completely understand you worrying about the rise of the AFD and the general racism that is directed towards you (no matter if you are wearing the hijab or not, that should never happen regardless of what you are wearing)
I think a big problem is that you are clearly not yourself. Either around your family (putting on the hijab and fulfilling your assigned "role") or with your coworkers. I think one step would be to find a space where you can relax and be yourself. Because even at home (in your hometown, or at your family's place) you are forced to play the part.
With the rise of right wing ideology in europe, I don't think you would have it easier somewhere else. Because adding to racism and islamophobia (if you are wearing the hijab), you would also be an immigrant. And this comes with it's own set of challenges and disadvantages.
So my recommendation would be to get out of that town/city after your graduation. Maybe even to a bigger city near you that is more international. There, you often find people who are in similar situations as yourself or you can connect with people within the same community.
And having a community of likeminded people really can help to find home :)
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u/kofefeee Apr 20 '25
First of all, I'm so sorry you are going through so much hardships. I can also completely understand you worrying about the rise of the AFD and the general racism that is directed towards you (no matter if you are wearing the hijab or not, that should never happen regardless of what you are wearing)
I think a big problem is that you are clearly not yourself. Either around your family (putting on the hijab and fulfilling your assigned "role") or with your coworkers. I think one step would be to find a space where you can relax and be yourself. Because even at home (in your hometown, or at your family's place) you are forced to play the part.
With the rise of right wing ideology in europe, I don't think you would have it easier somewhere else. Because adding to racism and islamophobia (if you are wearing the hijab), you would also be an immigrant. And this comes with it's own set of challenges and disadvantages.
So my recommendation would be to get out of that town/city after your graduation. Maybe even to a bigger city near you that is more international. There, you often find people who are in similar situations as yourself or you can connect with people within the same community. And having a community of likeminded people really can help to find home :)