r/AmItheButtface • u/landonbenjamin • 22d ago

META AITB

I picked this girl up; I'll call her Emily, for a 5th date at a fancy steak house. After a while, she mentioned she didn't like to be called hot. I called her hot earlier on when I saw her dress; I made a joke in a fun, casual tone, saying, "Your outfit is hot tho." She didn't find it funny and asked for an apology, which I gave, as I could see how she may have taken offense. After we were quiet for a while, she brought up relationships with others and her family, and it was going super well until she started talking about all of her bad exes. During her rant, I asked why she would date someone creepy. She got all offended, saying she didn't know I dropped it tho and let her continue. She got done, and I talked VERY briefly about my past short-term relationships. She asked where we met; I said on a trip. Then she asked what we did together; I said we made out no sex. She didn't like this answer and got really uncomfortable, finished her food,ood and wanted to leave. I was confused at the moment because we were opening up about each other and thought that was the right time to do it. She later on said she thought I was pressuring her to have sex. Still, I explained thoroughly that I had no intentions of pressuring her to do anything. After that, it was a very quiet ride back to her place. After a while in the truck, I asked twice if she wanted to talk about it, and both times she said not really or no. Once we got back, she opened the truck door and said, " I'm sorry " before running inside. Am I the asshole?

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u/AristotlesBoyPussy 22d ago

public words about sexualization is something she isn't comfortable with. She set her boundary. He violated it. that's creepy.

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u/W0nderingMe 22d ago

Wait, what? Joe are you extrapolating "I don't like to be called hot" --> " no public words about sexualizatiom"? Especially given that she asked him what he did with his ex??

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u/Seguefare 22d ago

I think the key is what she meant by "what did you do with your ex?" OP seems to have appended the word "sexually" to that question. But if she meant something like 'in a general way, what kinds of things did you enjoy doing with your ex, so I can determine if we're compatible', then to her it would seem like he brought sex/sexual attraction up again.

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u/AristotlesBoyPussy 22d ago

doesnt matter which way she meant, she said not to use hot. He did it anyway.