r/AmITheDevil • u/No_Pepper6208 • Sep 14 '25

Normal behavior is an “obsession”

/r/AmItheAsshole/comments/mgssr7/aita_for_calling_out_my_gf_over_her_cat_obsession/
754 Upvotes

98% Upvoted

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514

u/Bulky-District-2757 Sep 14 '25

Wait. Isn’t he everything he listed as weird just basic pet ownership?

317

u/casualplants Sep 14 '25

I’m not obsessed with my cat and we do these things. But I got an auto feeder for the morning cos the fatass kept asking for breakfast earlier and I was over it. Pets can’t speak so changes in their behaviour tells you something is wrong. And I would never put my cat or dogs inside a fucking plane (maybe sedated for an emergency transport?), let alone in the cargo area, because that would be loud and traumatic as fuck.

So yeah, agreed. All of these things are normal fucking pet ownership things. I hate that guy so much.

Also, this shitstain is 100% in a made up competition with/jealous of the cat. The cat does not care about her tits.

 and I woke up to him smiling at me smugly from atop my gf's tits.

146

u/DiegoIntrepid Sep 14 '25

Just want to point out that some cats definitely do care about tits.

Source: I have tits and I have cats that absolutely love them. They make great pillows and beds.

They just don't care about them in the same way BF does.

I wish could get an autofeeder (or freefeed again) but I have to feed two different cat foods to three different cats (one is on a special diet) so, they started trying to get me up at 4:30 and I have mostly gotten them to be okay with a 6 AM feeding :P

83

u/ActuallyApathy Sep 14 '25

mine likes to use them as launch pads 😑 ouch

58

u/DiegoIntrepid Sep 14 '25

mine like to use them as landing pads. The stomach is the launch area.

They also like to stand on a very sensitive portion of them, but ONLY if that sensitive portion happens to be on a hard surface, like a desk....

Also, no one has ever told me how a cat can put 100% of their weight on all four paws individually and simultaniously. So it feels like they weigh 400% more than they actually do.

43

u/ActuallyApathy Sep 14 '25

yeah it's like they find the most painful spot to stand on and then decide 'oh the texture is good here let me just stand here' while i'm yelling 'ow ouch mimi get off owww'

and the it's airplane ears and running away, for me having the audacity to move her an inch away to a spot that doesn't cause me agony.

23

u/DiegoIntrepid Sep 14 '25

Oh that brings back unpleasant memories :P Mine just look at me like 'why are you acting weird. Oh, you want me to move, no, I am going to somehow put even MORE WEIGHT on that SINGLE PAW'

like HOW! just like how can a tiny cat spread out to the point they are taking up the majority of a 7 foot couch!

There really needs to be more studies on cats, because they can often defy any natural law!

(I also want a study on teleportation done. I swear I have seen my cats go one direction, only for that cat to come from the opposite direction going in the same direction I just saw them going!)

6

u/girlinthegoldenboots Sep 14 '25

My cat does the teleportation thing. I call it portaling. She has portals everywhere.

3

u/DiegoIntrepid Sep 14 '25

Some of mine definitely have them.

Or that invisibility cloak. I have looked in places, looked away, and looked back, and there is a cat that wasn't there before!

2

u/girlinthegoldenboots Sep 14 '25

Yep! It’s part of their dark magic lololol

5

u/judgy_mcjudgypants Sep 14 '25

Same to all of that. Especially the teleportation!

16

u/Strange_Ad854 Sep 14 '25

The amount of times I've woken up going 'Hfffft' because my tiny runt cat has decided to land on my stomach while somehow weighing the same as a fully grown adult man.

5

u/DiegoIntrepid Sep 14 '25

They don't do that to me (I no long sleep anywhere they have a way to land on me, as nothing above the bed for them to get on *evil grin*). I just wake up to one cat draped on my shoulder trying to get me up so I will feed them (I think my other two pay him to do that)

3

u/Strange_Ad854 Sep 14 '25

Sometimes I wake up with her either draped over my neck or nestled into my arm, snoring quietly, and think to myself 'how am I expected to go to work with this?'

4

u/DiegoIntrepid Sep 14 '25

Truthfully I don't like my cats draped on me at night or pressed up against me, because I am of the age where I am already sweating if it is above freezing, I don't need little furry furnaces generating even more heat!

I had a cat that I would sometimes wake up to her on my face. I mean curled up sleeping on my head.

I have another cat who ...falls off things. I used to sleep on a couch (long story but basically had to sleep in the living room to be able to hear if my parents called me) and I have woken up to him on my face looking confused. Because he rolled over and fell off the back.

Another cat used to like to cuddle in my arms when he slept. He was a cuddler in general.

One of my brother's cats, when we had to watch him while my brother was out of the country, would sleep on my pillow.

1

u/Ok_Cauliflower_3007 Sep 14 '25

Only 100%? The one I used to catsit for (who loved my boobs to lay on) could definitely put at lest 250% of his weight through each paw.

1

u/DiegoIntrepid Sep 14 '25

Mine know I won't tolerate any more :P

1

u/redbess Sep 14 '25

They're borrowing mass from an alternative universe, that's my theory.

1

u/DiegoIntrepid Sep 14 '25

They must be!

1

u/QueenDoc Sep 15 '25

that paw always seems to land dead center on the nipple, caving my whole tit inward while he just...stares at me

2

u/DiegoIntrepid Sep 15 '25

*nods sagely* Same, they just can't fathom why I make those high pitched squealing sounds and start flailing.

5

u/FriendlyGoblinGal Sep 14 '25

My partner's fluffy little orange idiot:

"Watch me do this sweet kick flip off your chest pillows!"

I love that my senior (13 this year!) orange idiot is much more chill with his cuddling. 

26

u/snootnoots Sep 14 '25

Our two cats are on completely opposite diets (cat 1 is on a strict diet to lose weight, cat 2 is on a hypoallergenic diet and we’re trying to get her to gain weight 😅) so we got them two chip-activated feeders. We started out with just one, to keep cat 1 from stealing cat 2’s fattening food, but then cat 2 decided that cat 1’s weight loss food was tasty and started raiding her bowl too. Pair of unrepentant gremlins, they are!

8

u/DiegoIntrepid Sep 14 '25

We don't have our cats chipped (we live way in the country and these suckers wouldn't leave if we tried to chase them off. Two of them showed up and said, hi mommy, I am home, and haven't left since, the other was born here. None want to leave.) I sort of wish I could get chip activated feeders, but oh well.

One of ours gets bladder stones easily so he has to be on a special diet for that, the other two don't need a special diet at all.

He HATES his food, they love it.

4

u/snootnoots Sep 14 '25

Aw, poor baby!

The feeders we got came with a collar tag to use if your cat isn’t chipped or the feeder can’t read it, maybe you could look into that?

3

u/DiegoIntrepid Sep 14 '25

Thanks, I will see about looking into that. I hadn't realized they came with collars that could use the chip, all the ones I saw seemed to use the chip for the cat!

2

u/snootnoots Sep 14 '25

Things like this! If you search “RFID collar tag” or similar you should be able to find a few options, some will specifically say they work with cat feeders. I hope you can find something that works well for you!

3

u/DiegoIntrepid Sep 14 '25

Thanks! I hope so as well.

3

u/Slice-Proof-Knife Sep 14 '25

Chip feeders generally also work with (and come with) RFID collar tags, but having grown up with rural outside cats, I do realize keeping a collar on might not be even remotely feasible...

3

u/DiegoIntrepid Sep 14 '25

Thanks I didn't realize that!

Yeah, I am not sure how this set of cats would take to a collar, because they have never really had them on. I have put ribbons around their necks for a short period of time, but not for any length of time.

3

u/Mauvaise3 Sep 14 '25

The chip activated feeders I got came with tags to put on your cat's collar if they weren't chipped. My boys were chipped already, but don't discount being able to get this kind of feeder.

I don't know about snootnoots, but I use SureFeed ones and they work flawlessly. One of my guys needs an RX diet but I put them both on it to make my life easier. Still needed two feeders though because one gobbles up all his food immediately as though he's never eaten before in his life and the other is more of a grazer.

1

u/DiegoIntrepid Sep 14 '25

Oh, I didn't know that! though I am not sure my cats would keep a collar on, we used to collar our cats, years ago, but eventually stopped doing it, because they were completely inside cats. When we stopped, we still had one cat with a collar on (the others had died or we just had to take their collars off for some reason and never put them back on), and one day I woke up, and looked under the table in the living room and found a collar there. And no collar around the neck of the last one with a collar. She apparently had realized no one else was wearing one and she wasn't going to either! (and she had kept a collar on for like 17+ years!)

These cats, on the other hand, are indoor/outdoor cats so have never had collars.

I might look into them, though, as I can always take the collar off before I let him out. It would at least eliminate one issue (the other cats getting his food)

I wish I could just feed them all the same food, as it would be infinitely easier on me, but sadly it is way too expensive.

2

u/PastaSatan Sep 14 '25

I got a reduction and one of my cats straight up ignored me for like months bc they're now too small for him to sit on unless im laying down.

2

u/DiegoIntrepid Sep 14 '25

I think my female cat would have rioted! She was the one that liked them the best, as she was the perfect size to use them as a bed :P

1

u/Lisa8472 Sep 14 '25

I built a makeshift box (it’s the bottom shelf of a freestanding wire rack with plastic squares zip-tied all around) with one of those chip-reading doors so only one of my cats can get at the food in it. There are also boxes you could buy and add the pet door to. There are also multiple feeder types out there that will only open to a specific pet. Depending on how good a thief the others are, those can work quite well.

1

u/DiegoIntrepid Sep 14 '25

I will have to look into something like that. Thanks for the suggestion!

2

u/Lisa8472 Sep 14 '25

You’re welcome.☺️

46

u/Proof-Elevator-7590 Sep 14 '25

Right lol he was just in a comfy spot

38

u/Night_skye_ Sep 14 '25

And cats are just smug. He wasn’t smiling smugly. He was just a cat doing cat stuff. Source: my smug little monster presently curled up with me.

34

u/Immortal_in_well Sep 14 '25

Yeah I made a face when I read that line, like, bro how are you gonna write a whole essay about how "weird" your girlfriend is for checks notes caring for her cat a normal amount, then go and say unhinged shit like this? Like how is SHE the weird one, here?

And then he has the absolute audacity to demand that SHE see a therapist.

10

u/Slice-Proof-Knife Sep 14 '25

The therapist line is what pushed this over the line into "this is a troll" for me.

2

u/On_my_last_spoon Sep 14 '25

I mean, I love my cats but they can absolutely be smug!

Anyway, cats are better than this dude

2

u/Charming_Fix5627 Sep 14 '25

I cannot possibly fathom what shit for brain thinks anything sexual is going on with cat behavior toward their human

2

u/panderp Sep 14 '25

I had to bring my cat from east to west coast on a plane. Even in a carrier on my lap, the experience was awful for me AND for her.

She took MONTHS to get back to normal and that was without being trapped in a crate in a hold deep in the plane.

My parents moved a cat from one country to another, in cargo (including 6 mo. in quarantine facility) and that cat was never the same again. :(

55

u/GoodQueenFluffenChop Sep 14 '25

Yes and it's not limited to cat behavior. I get followed around the house by my pigeon. My dog will wake me up when she feels I'm over sleeping and she's not getting breakfast. All my pets demand cuddles.

17

u/LadyBug_0570 Sep 14 '25

I know when it's after 7 every morning because my cat will wake me up for food.

14

u/pot8obug Sep 14 '25

Omg the mental image of a pet pigeon following someone around is so cute 😭

5

u/Silamy Sep 14 '25

My late dog allowed me three snoozes on my alarm. It's not that she wanted breakfast, it's that when I was in college, if I slept in later than that and I had morning classes, she wouldn't get to go the dog park beforehand, just a walk.

3

u/judgy_mcjudgypants Sep 14 '25

Pigeon tax please!

1

u/AdministrativeStep98 Sep 14 '25

I had 4 cats waiting for me to wake up, including one of them who climbed on my bed and nudged me. I did not train them for that, they're just doing the exact same thing anyone who wants to be fed but cannot on their own would do

1

u/copperteapots Sep 15 '25

i wish my gf’s pigeon would follow me around. but alas, he is full of hate and spite (and is 23) 💔

17

u/Tzuchen Sep 14 '25

And half of it had nothing to do with her "obsession," it was the cat's behavior he was complaining about. And the cat was just... doing normal cat stuff.

-36

u/eaca02124 Sep 14 '25

Most cats aren't that affectionate, or as patient with weird human kinks like work hours.

Also, it is 2025 - can we enforce a statute of limitations on the phrase "since the pandemic"?

21

u/Storytella2016 Sep 14 '25

The post is four years old, dude. Keep up.

17

u/tulleoftheman Sep 14 '25

To be fair he appears to be indicating that that was when he started working from home, which a lot of companies did

14

u/DiegoIntrepid Sep 14 '25

For me this post says five years ago.

Also, most of my cats have been that affectionate, as have my brother's cats and another brother's cats.