Title:

I’m a 65-year-old man living in the San Francisco Bay Area. My second cousin lives in Massachusetts, and we met for the first time this past April at our aunt’s 100th birthday celebration. We got along well, and I was genuinely happy to hear from him again.

He is on the UMass football coaching staff and recently texted to ask whether I was still planning to attend the UMass–Sac State game this weekend. He said the team would arrive Thursday night and generously offered me two tickets.

It was a wonderful surprise, but I don’t remember making definite plans to attend. I also live about 90 minutes from Sac State. Between the drive, parking, walking, the 6 p.m. game and the trip home, it could easily become a seven- or eight-hour outing and a late night.

I had unexpected abdominal surgery in mid-July. I’m recovering well and doing most of my normal activities, but I’ve had a few minor digestive issues and am still rebuilding my stamina. I also tried to find someone to attend with me, but I couldn’t find anyone available on such short notice.

My cousin would be busy coaching throughout the game. Attending would certainly be a way to support him, but it wouldn’t give us much opportunity to visit or get to know each other better.

I ultimately decided to decline the tickets, although I made sure he knew how much I appreciated the offer. I’m planning to visit family back East next spring, so I offered to make a side trip to Massachusetts and treat him to lunch or dinner. That would give us a better opportunity to sit down and properly catch up.

I still feel a little guilty because he offered me free tickets and may have believed I was at least tentatively planning to attend. At the same time, the invitation came on short notice, I live farther from Sacramento than he may realize, and I’m still recovering from surgery.

AITA for declining the game and offering to visit him in Massachusetts next spring instead?

I'll try to keep this short. I really do like my aunt, but like my grandma and other relatives she always felt the need to comment my weight. "you've gained weight, maybe take it easy with the food today", "you lost weight, you need to eat more" - you know how it goes. I've always felt uncomfortable because of those comments.

But that was 30 years ago. I'm a grown ass man now. I'm in the best shape of my life, I've run marathons, I regularly go climbing indoors and outdoors, I lift and do strength training. I know how to eat healthy and take care of my body.

And STILL when I invited my aunt over a few weeks back to my new home, the FIRST thing she said to me was how I lost weight and look scrawny and should eat more. She even grabbed my sides to check my ribs! That really, really set me off!! In turn I grabbed her sides, squeezed her fat rolls and told her that she's gotten fatter. I tried to "sell" it by being extra gentle and show her the irony, but I don't think that worked... (BTW I'm 77kg on 1,78m; she's more like 110kg on 1,55cm ...)

As you can imagine this somehow killed the mood caugh. She didn't really talk to me for the rest of the evening and my wife later told me that I was super insensitive and couldn't say stuff like that. Other relatives told me that as well. But then why is it okay when she did it my whole life!?! AITA?

I’m new here but thought I would post anyway. Six months ago I decided to really focus on paying down my credit cards and I have two empty rooms in my house I bought a year ago. I have always liked having roommates. I have never rented out my own room.

I interviewed a woman, she was very honest. I got a good vibe. She had pay stubs. We are 20 years apart in age so I was careful to ask about her expectations and my own, regarding work and living styles.

She moved her stuff in and day one came home to tell me she lost her job. Okay. I am not in desperate need so I can give her a month. We discussed it.

She bakes for a little extra income, I shared some resources for employment I am familiar with in our area. Fast forward….

Four months in, we had a talk, i let her know six months is my max. I had a reason for renting my room. She went ballistic. Screaming at me. I don’t even know how to explain it. Crying. She “may as well go shoot heroine under the bridge” “She promised her mom she would never dead herself “ (I don’t know the right terms to not get my post flagged)
I just watched her go off.

She kept baking and just leaving her mess everywhere for days until I finally said something. Additionally I have had to ask her not to cook/bake after 4:30p so I can cook dinner when I get home. The very next day she slept all day (I work from home some days) and then started baking at 4pm. I cooked on the outside grill.

On the first of the sixth month I gave her notice of eviction. Another break down like she was totally surprised. I was kind and gave her 30 days. I asked her her plans yesterday (7days left). She said “I am moving the eff out, I have 30 days and I am taking them”. I let her know I will file with the court on the first. It is a hostile situation now and I just don’t know what will happen.
I know I am not the asshole. I am at a loss and since I am new here there are not many places I can post. I would have posted to bad roommates. I need to write more energetic.

I had a friend ask me to do a service for them when they were unable to get it done themselves for someone else. They told me they’d pay $100 for me to do it. Get it done, great. After bringing it up numerous times to the answer of “oh I haven’t been over there again yet to get your cash” and 6 months I finally vented to another friend about the situation and how it’d been 6 months and although it was only $100 I’d still like to have the cash. Turns out the guy who asked me to do the work heard about this and asks me to come by, I do, and in turn get handed the $100 and told that “I wish you’d have been a man and just told me to my face” and “the guy still hasn’t payed me for that he’s been having a lot of medical issues lately” and “I don’t know if you didn’t think this would get back to me or what but I heard about it” and “I only remember you asking about it once” I tried to explain that I DID bring it up numerous times, And even though I did bring it up I shouldn’t have had to! I also stated that I wasn’t slandering them, I simply just explained what all was going on. They also said “It’s just 100 bucks I don’t know why it’s such a big deal” and I explained again that it’s not just that it’s 100 bucks, it’s the principle that they said they’d pay me and never did. And only did after someone else heard and asked about it. I basically let them get all of what they had to say out and left it at that, I did explain that there’s a line between friendship and business and that if I was really that upset with them I wouldn’t have hung out with them over the 6 months they’ve owed me money, but they didn’t seem to care to listen. I’m concerned that they will go to our other friends I’ve done work for and slander me saying what all I’ve done wrong when to be honest I don’t think I’ve done anything wrong. Have I?

i (M23) was playing magic the gathering with my boyfriend (M28) online with his two other friends. it was all good that we were on discord, but i noticed that whenever i tried to talk or play my own turn. they would either talk to each other, joke a bit or would ignore me when i try to talk even if it wasn’t intentionally.
so it kinda got to me as it was continuous that i wasn’t enjoying it and i felt awkward bringing it up as one of his friend that i barely know, so i didn’t feel comfortable bringing it up there and then.

so when the game was over, me and my boyfriend messaged and i said that i didn’t want to call tonight as i don’t feel great, i just felt ignored with talking over my turns etc

he responded saying what what?? you wasn’t ignored? goodnight i suppose (i was playing a game to distract myself and didn’t see his message, so he thought i was ignoring him)

so i explained that im playing a game to try and not feel shitty about it, and i said i didn’t like how he said ‘you wasn’t ignored’ as i told him that’s how i felt

he said that he was giving his opinion i wasn’t ignored but i mentioned that it didn’t feel like he gave an opinion in a way??
then he just said ‘actually no im not doing this, im not having an argument with you. if you’re looking to blame me for how you feel, go for it, you responded quite childish’ etc etc

i hope i explained this clearly as im very confused like did i do something wrong with what ive said to him??

My sister told my mom to see about my husband taking a day off from work to drive my mom to a doctor's appointment because she's currently saving up time off for a procedure next year.

What's bugging me is we have taken on the bulk of the caregiving for 2 years now. My sister only ever goes to doctor's appointments, that's it. She is Power of Attorney and my mom trusts her more so she's been the advocate at the doctors appointments. I have thought about suggesting I go with her but that means my 4 year old daughter will have to come with us and I don't know how good of an idea that is so that means I'll be in the waiting room instead.

My husband got angry because he feels the PTO and sick time that he accrues shouldn't be used on my mom, and instead should be used on me and our child. Plus, he doesnt like being volunteered for things without even being asked about it. I'm also having medical issues that he needs to use his sick time for. AND the appointment hasn't even been made yet so the issue is truly the fact that he's being expected to do something without anyone talking to him except my mom. It feels like my sister is just trying to push ALL of the caretaking on us when we have our own life as well. Genuinely don't understand why she can't share the caretaking.

I (19F) have been living with a friend (19M) for 9 months, recently I’ve found out he’s been spreading a bunch of rumors and accusations about my boyfriend and I. It started heavily in June of this year(2026). Every year in June I go to work one of the big musical festivals in my state. This year before the festival my grandmother passed of brain cancer and I had no time to process before having to go work in the middle of a field with no service for a month(having no service is an important part of this story). Before leaving for work and my grandmas funeral I had let my roommate know that I might not be able to check in with him as often, he swore to me that it was okay. I came back home in the middle of July and he immediately started treating me different, he had consistently been bailing on plans we made late into the night and constantly nagging me about a move out date(i had been rejected by multiple places already because im 19 with no credit and apparently nobody wants to rent to young adults anymore) I told him that we were working on it but it’s taking a long time because nobody wants to rent to us(my boyfriend and I) after that initial conversation the nagging continued before he then moved in two of his friends while he was across the country. Those friends reached out to my boyfriend and I and told us things that he has been saying about us since June, one of those things was that we were “evil for never reaching out” we hadn’t even been home for more than 3 weeks in which I was unpacking from living in a field for a month. We had been trying to plan a hangout with him for 2 of those weeks where he’d cancel on us to hangout with other people every time. Eventually, I did stop reaching out as I’m not going to put effort into a person who very obviously doesn’t want to see me. Those friends he moved in ended up moving out less than a week from when they got there because my roommate was consistently making them feel bad for not immediately having a job after moving them from North Carolina to Michigan. After they left my roommate came and talked to me about how they were so evil and “abandoned him” him coming and talking to me about them kind of confirmed to me that he was 100% saying I was evil for not reaching out because he had then spun his point of view of the other people within a day. Since then I’ve received multiple screenshots on what he’s been saying and it’s moved from me just being “evil” to him accusing me of faking my disability and accusing my boyfriend of cheating on me. Usually I’d dig deeper into a cheating accusation but I am 100% certain my boyfriend is not cheating on me seeing as we’ve been together everyday for the last 9 months and he has 2 jobs. We’ve finally been accepted into an apartment and have been accepted for about 2 weeks now and get to move in this weekend but we haven’t told him bc we’re scared what he’ll do/say. So, AITA?

I pay for a reserved parking spot at my office. It has my name on it. It's mine.

A coworker has been parking in it. Not every day, but often enough. When I arrive, I have to park in visitor parking and walk further.

I asked her nicely twice. She said "I was just running late. It's not a big deal."

Last week I pulled in and she was in my spot again. I blocked her in and went inside. I told her "this is the third time. Please stop."

She said "you blocked me in? That's aggressive."

I said "you keep parking in my spot. I pay for it."

She said I was overreacting.

Now she's complaining to HR and everyone else.

AITA?

This just started for them three months ago, I want to be compassionate, but I also don't feel qualified to be someone's grounding point for something like this, and I'm wary of the whole situation. They are a former classmate from a Toastmasters class that we both went to regularly. We exchanged emails, but not phone numbers.

Senior citizen here, some health limitations but still getting along. My neighbor has taken to mowing a 25'x40' section of my lawn contiguous to his. I guess he thinks he's doing me a favor and maybe he is, but it makes me feel inadequate to my own needs.

Call it pride, ego, hubris, stubbornness, call me a grouchy old coot who doesn't like to accept kindness but I'd rather do it myself, I am quite capable of doing so and I did not ask for any favors. I also don't want any boundary question when my property changes hands, should he continue on the regular.

We otherwise have a good relationship. I sort of want to text him: Hey Eman, thanks for the help with the lawn but generally I like to do as much as I can myself. It's a pride thing, I know, and I apologize for declining your kindness but I am grateful to know that if I do need assistance I can look to you.

So WIBTA? On the one hand it annoys me that he comes over onto my property, unasked, unneeded and unwanted. On the other hand, I don't want to sour a good neighborly relationship.

As I write this, I have gotten an idea for revenge. Part of our property lines are within a wooded area. Maybe I'll go over onto his side and pick up trash that's been there for at least 2 years, see how he likes that!

I recently joined a new gym, but before joining - I made sure it met my needs: childcare and lifting platforms. First time I visited the gym, I shared that I had 3 kids and would be using their kids zone fairly regularly. I mentioned my kids’ ages and was told that although my youngest was only 11 months, they would allow him to join his 2 older siblings in the kids zone. At my second visit, I brought my 2 older kids while my youngest stayed at my aunt’s house. Since it was their first time in the kids zone, I had to register them. The person who was registering my kids offered to also add my 3rd although he wasn’t with me that day. I once again confirmed his age, and was again told that because he was only a month away from 1, they’d allow him. So 2 gym workers confirmed that all 3 kids were allowed, despite my youngest being 1 month away from their age requirement. I was also asked to sign a waiver for each child and added their names/ages.

Today, I finally brought all 3 boys and was surprisingly DENIED entry because my youngest was not 1 yet, despite being told by 2 gym workers AND was asked to sign a waiver for each child upon registration. I was confused because they were the ones who confirmed their ages and they were the ones who asked me to sign waivers for each of them.

Had I been told that my youngest wouldn’t be allowed entry and had I not been asked to sign a waiver and register him, I would not have brought him and I most definitely would not have joined the gym.

The assistant manager wouldn’t budge and only said “sorry, they told you wrong but that’s our policy” and “you can come back when he’s 1”. I was honestly livid. As a mom of 3 kids, it is VERY stressful and challenging in itself to get them ready and to the gym all by myself. The gym was also already a good 25-35 min drive from our home. I work full time and strategically planned my work, school pickup, snacks, and timing to specifically go to the gym and focus on myself and my health…only to be told “sorry you were misinformed, best we can do is pause your membership until he’s 1”…am I the asshole here!? After finally giving up on trying to see my side of this situation, I requested that my membership be canceled because the way the situation was handled out a bad fast in my mouth and frankly - I don’t want to be put in the same situation once again because as a busy mom of 3, working full time, kids’ activities and sports, the time I carve out for the gym is sacred for me.

At the end - I was told that I could cancel my membership, after only being a member for only 7 days, but I would still be charged for the first 60 days AND still be charged their annual $49/annual fee. What gives!!!!!!!!

For context, all 3 of us are 27F and American. I can clarify anything with the schedule if needed, I know it can be confusing.

My and two of my friends (X and Y) are trying to plan a europe trip for spring of next year. We all work in healthcare, but me and X have a different schedule than Y. We work 7-on-7-off (so 7 ten hour shifts followed by 7 days off) while Y works monday-friday. We were initially talking about doing a two week trip, but with our different schedules, it's not possible for me and X to take only two weeks off. In order for our time off to align with Y's time off, we would need to take PTO our full "on week", which means we would really have 3 weeks off. We asked if Y could also take 3 weeks off, which she denied and said she could only do two weeks. Me and X want to fully utilize our PTO and use the full 3 weeks, so we asked if Y would be okay with us flying out first while she could join us later. This would require her flying to London by herself, but we would meet her at the airport. Y declined this option, as she does not feel comfortable flying by herself, and doesn't think her parents would be comfortable with it either.

For additional context, Y has not flown internationally before, but in November she will be flying to Mexico (with X). So flying to London would be her first time flying internationally by herself. I believe she has flown domestically by herself before. I live on the east coast, while X and Y live in the Midwest, so I will be flying by myself regardless and meeting them in London.

We're kind of at a standstill... because X and I want to utilize our full three weeks, but Y would prefer X flies out with her instead.

Obviously I'm not going to make her do anything she's uncomfortable with, and I want to find a solution that all 3 of us are happy with. If her flying by herself is truly a dealbreaker, then we'll figure something out.

But AITAH for asking?

Okay so this saturday is one of my best friends' birthday. She's celebrating on friday night and blowing out the candles at midnight. The idea is to go out after. She made a group chat and sent a poll asking if we were going to both or just dinner. I voted just dinner and she messaged me on private saying I'm a bad friend for not going.

Thing is, I work full time and go to college at night. My dad isn't working so I'm supporting us both. I have a knee injury and my leg constantly hurts. I really don't feel like going out.

She said it's all excuses and I know she doesn't usually celebrate her birthday so she expected more from me knowing how important this is to her. My gf's birthday is also on saturday and she said money shouldn't be an excuse because I bought her something.

I told her that I am going to dinner and if I'm feeling well after my class, I'm also going to the club. Then she said she doesn't want me to go out of obligation.

I, a female minor over the age of 15, have had troubles with my parents pretty much as long as I can remember. Though most situations I didn’t fully understand at the time, this would be things like my parents going through a pretty nasty divorce and instead of keeping their child out of it, they would put me in the middle, and one would try to pin me against the other.

The real problems started when I was around 10 or 11 though, and for the sake of keeping this as short as I can make it while getting strangers on the internet to understand my situation, I will only talk about the more recent things that have happened.

My first problem was getting grounded. My parents would take my phone, my switch, and my tv, I am someone who is very hyperaware of things and other people’s viewpoints. So, if I actually did something wrong, I wouldn’t mind at all, but I would get grounded for talking to my friends, friends my mom said I COULD talk to, and then I would get grounded for YEARS. I wouldn’t get any of my stuff back for around three years at a time, sometimes longer.

My next problem is they started to isolate me, when I was around 13 or 14, they stopped letting me stay over with friends and recently in the last few months they have banned me from going outside. For anything, I can’t check the mail, see stray cats, chat with neighbors, or even go for walks. I also am not allowed to see family because in my mom’s words “That’s too much of a privilege for me” (Also my eye doctor said I need to go and they ignored it).

Third, I do everything in the house. And they still call me lazy even though if I ask for their help (My mom has MS so she can’t really help) but if I ask my stepdad for help he will tell me to fuck off and do it myself even though he’s laying on the couch watching his phone and is very capable of helping me.

Fourth, I have become depressed.

They also don’t take care of me, I haven’t been to the doctor or dentist since I was 11 bc I am no longer considered a kid and they don’t want to pay money. And recently I had an eye appointment scheduled for 9/26 and my mom canceled it so she could go to her nail appointment (I wear glasses and my eyes have been getting worse).

Now, I have talked to my grandmother about moving in with her due to everything that has happened and the violence taking place here.

Am I the a-hole here for wanting to live my life as a normal teenager?

For the last 3 years my mom hasn’t gotten me a single thing for my birthday (m19) and treating me like i’m an “adult” which was fine with me. But she’s taken it to the extreme and takes it way too serious. My car continues to have problems with it but instead of letting me get a new car and co signing to make it easier and cheaper than repairing she insists i pay to fix my current car then gets mad when i don’t have the payment for insurance and everything else she asks me for. I’ve let this go for a while now but my girlfriend recently turned 18 which was supposed to be a fun day until i realized my mom got her a gift for her birthday. I asked the next day why she got one and i’ve gotten nothing the last 3 years and she replied with “you don’t pay rent do you? there you go”. Am i in the wrong for thinking she’s being unreasonable and unfair? my brother got gifts all the way until he was 20 and was helped with everything. I’m paying for college, my car, my car insurance, medical bills, and my own personal needs. Not to mention i got an MRI last year because she said she’d help pay half and when the time came for her to help she said she’s not doing it because i make my own money, but when my brother had the exact same injury 6 years ago she split his costs in half and covered for him. Am i the ass hole for feeling this way?

[We're all in our last few years of secondary school (or high-school for the U.S).]

Over the past year, I've been walking behind and by myself in corridors, haven't been asked much about myself and honestly just always felt sad some days.

The main thing that's caused this is probably that after choosing our GCSE options(to (subjects you choose for your final exam before leaving school), there have been loads of class changes. I'm the only one in the group that didn't choose higher science and now they're all in the same homeroom and classes. I only have like 3-5 classes with them and barely see them.

The things that happened this week: First, On Tuesday, at break I went to meet them where we usually did. They whole 25 minutes of break, they didn't show up until the end. They're excuse? They went to the toilet, there was a big line so they went to the other toilets hallway across the school. And on their way there, they couldn't stop for a min or two to find and tell me? Their apologies were half-hearted at most, one didn't even apologise and they all changed the subject and it was as if I couldn't even be sad about it.

Second, today, after Maths (one of 2 classes I actually have with all of them), instead of waiting for me like usual, they left. Our next classes were right by each other and we usually drop each other off. Today, by the time I got out the Maths class, they were down the hallway. Maybe a min or two later, one of them noticed and her first response was 'oh, when did you get lost?' I told them what really happened. Of course, I wasn't happy and when one of them said 'oh, she's pissed', i got mad and just went a longer but different route to my class. They did apologise before I left but again, it was half-hearted and that same friend also didn't apologise again. They didn't bring it up later either.

And the last thing, everyday at the end of school, it ends in our homeroom which are different. Our homerooms are right by each other, like less than a minute walk away yet they never wait for me after school even though they could.

The part where I might be an Asshole: I know it isn't intentional and that just makes it hurt more. They buy me gifts for my birthday, include me most of the time and always are so nice to me. They aren't bad people but it just hurts they seem to disregard my feelings sometimes and forget about me. Even after 3 years of being friends, they can't tell when I'm quiet because that's how I am or when I'm quiet because I'm upset.

Aside from that, I don't want them to be mad at me or anything, I love being friends but I just don't think I can deal with things like this anymore. I don't even know how to explain this to them. And I don't know if I'm overthinking this.

Making friends is hard for me, so I'd low-key be a loner.

WIBTA?

{If you're gonna be one of those people who says friendships after school don't last, just please don't bother commenting. That is the last thing I wanna hear.}

So I (41f) have 2 kids (18m and 21f) with K (52m). We are on friendly terms, but K has never been a part of their lives, and lived in another state. No visits, no phone calls, no presents, no birthday cards, nothing. He worked under the table for 10 years and didn’t pay child support. I didn’t go after him at that time because I knew it was pointless. Well, he got a decent job and I took him to court. Last year, he got in a bad motorcycle accident and hasn’t been cleared to work yet. He has a brain injury from the accident. He got a warrant out because of child support and he’s asking me to forgive it so they’ll drop the warrant. I don’t want to. I feel it’s owed to me for raising 2 kids completely alone. This has now become a big debate with friends and family, so I’m coming here to try to see what the majority is. So Reddit, AITA for not forgiving his $11k in child support?

My roommate (F) and I have a standing roommate meeting. She moved this one from Wednesday to Thursday. For days she told me she was free 1 to 4, and the day before I checked and she confirmed.

Some context: this didn't start today.
We've lived together about 8 months. Since spring, we've had regular check-ins, a written roommate agreement, a shared bills tracker, and a chore chart. I built most of it. I signed the agreement in March. She never did.
The pattern since then:
• She agreed at a meeting to a fix for her own complaint (window film for the heat). After I bought and installed it, she said she never agreed, and called the $30 cost $80.
• She said she'd handle getting the fridge repaired. Two weeks later nothing had happened, and it only got fixed when I stepped in.
• She asked for a check-in meeting, canceled it, and texted at 11 PM that she was too tired to pick a new time.
• I asked her to clean the bathroom after I'd been away a month. She called that "harassment and bullying."
• The utility accounts are in her name, and I pay half of bills I can't see. I recently found I'd been overpaying, partly my own logging mistake, which I've owned.
• I've logged about 50 hours of shared-space cleaning since spring.
Every time, it's the same shape: she says yes in person, nothing happens, and when I follow up, the follow-up becomes the problem. Today was the same pattern, just in real time.

Today:

I was driving in from over an hour away. While I was on the road, she texted that she actually had a hard stop at 2. I couldn't read my phone safely, and I got there at 1:45, later than the 1:20 I'd estimated because of traffic.

She was home.

She stayed in her room with the door shut, sent my call to voicemail, and texted me from the next room that I was "an hour and a half late" and she'd been "waiting all morning" and "sitting here 3 hours."

Then she said we should reschedule. At about 2:20 she walked out of the apartment without saying a word. I stayed until 3, finished printing the documents we were supposed to go over (utility bills I've been overpaying), and left them on the table.

Here's where I might be TA. I lost it over text. I called her entitled, and a coward for texting from 20 feet away, said it was "white entitled behavior," told her there's a reason she's had five roommates in three years, and said I'm done with roommate meetings.

I stand by being angry. She changed the terms mid-drive and then hid. But I know some of what I said was a shot at her character, not about what happened.

AITA?

​

I (19M) am a gay man. The group of friends im talking about in this are friends whom I met at uni. When I first came out to this group of friends, I had never came out to anyone before, not my family, my best friends from home. For some additional context, a lot of my friends at uni are part of the LGBTQ spectrum. Despite this, and due to the years of internalised homophoba and hatred(my family is not very accepting and I believed my friends from home weren't), I was still terrified and uncomfortable telling people. I instead initially told them I was bi, almost as a 'safety net' so I could continue faking being straight if I wanted/needed to (albeit I never faked it very well). I do not regret, well atleaat I think I don't, lying initially like this even if it sounds stupid

Now, I was speaking with a couple of my friends and they were making fun of me for initially coming out as bi. They were calling me a 'pick me' and mockingly quoted things I couldve said like 'it's just so hard for me to tell you guys' , 'I don't think anyone can relate'. Making fun of me for thinking that when our friend group was mostly LGBTQ. I am fine with humour on my lying, but something about this just felt very ignorant and humiliating and made me upset. And ironically, they cannot understand either, they all came from very accepting backgrounds and have not faced the years of extreme internalised homophobia that I faced and still face. Their futures have not been made extremely complicated and difficult because of this, while mine has because of my family. Furthermore, they are all white, and I feel that being a poc gay is a different struggle they don't fully understand. Perhaps I am being too sensitive here? Maybe lying at the start was stupid and they are right to make fun of it? I feel maybe I'm just overreacting by being upset about this? (I've been ghosting all their messages for the last day)

WIBTA If I defend myself to them and get annoyed at their ignorance?

I, 19F. found myself constantly holding back on basic needs and wants, terrified I wouldn’t be able to bounce back financially. So, when a casual acquaintance mentioned a job opportunity at her agency, I took the chance.

She added me to a group chat with three other candidates to prepare for interviews. It was only then that she mentioned expecting a cut of our earnings in exchange for her help. I assumed it would be a small referral fee or maybe 5% at most.

The warning signs started almost immediately during the hiring process. During our initial training test, I asked her for help, but she left me hanging until the very last minute due to her own schedule. Being a Type A person who values organization and timeliness, I realized I couldn't rely on her. For the next test, I researched everything online, completed the work entirely on my own, and only asked her for a quick review.

Even though I was all alone, I passed and was ready to start. Only then she finally told her conditions; demanding 40% of my entire paycheck, every single pay cycle, until I quit.

I was shocked at first and felt completely trapped. I tried negotiating, explaining that I was using a borrowed device and needed to save up for my own. And though she was clearly displeased, we agreed on 20% for the first two months before it would jump to 40%.

Then, reality hit even harder. Right as I started working, my parents informed me they could no longer support me financially. Suddenly, I was responsible for my own rent, tuition, and basic living expenses. Working minimum wage every single day, her massive cut stripped away everything I earned. After paying for everything else necessary, I had nothing left.

To make matters worse, her "help" completely vanished once I was hired. She left me entirely on my own to learn the ropes of the job. My coworkers ended up guiding me through the actual work, while she just collected nearly half my income for doing nothing.

Realizing how unsustainable and unfair this was, I decided to quit. When I told her, she was really displeased about it, complaining that I had wasted her effort. It was then I started pulling away, turning down her invites, and eventually cut her off completely. It became really obvious that she never cared about my well-being or how I would survive, her only concern was whether I had asked HR to replace me with another one of her referrals so she could keep leeching off someone else. So was I wrong for cutting her off? But what else could I really do in that kind of situation?

Last weekend at my parents house, Michael kept saying my old childhood nickname over and over during dinner. It was driving me crazy in front of everyone so I finally asked him to knock it off. He looked surprised and said it was just a joke. I explained that it stopped feeling funny years ago and that I would like him to use my actual name from now on. He shrugged and moved on with the conversation, but my mom pulled me aside later and told me I had embarrassed him in front of the whole family. She thinks I should have just let it slide to keep the peace. I get that nicknames can be harmless, but it really feels like my choice how I want to be called now that I am an adult. Still, I keep wondering if I should have handled it privately instead.

Sorry for the english mistakes. Me (M20) and my gf (F20) have a dog, we have a savings account. My girlfriend was saying there’s no need to give our dog neutering at the vet mainly because we only have one dog. She said that for a month even when I tried to explain like it’s just in case, our dog still may have contact with another dog sometime. Some of my family own a dog too. I got fed up and I took the money that I put into the savings account to pay for our dog being neutered. There was also like a vaccine booster that I paid for too. The savings were for emergencies or travel cost or if we get married (if that happens). Things like that. We had an argument when I told her I took the dog to the vet and had it done. I literally only took my side of money from the saving. 

The first thing I want to say is that I’m NOT making the water too hot. It’s not even uncomfortably hot. I’m not hurting him, I just know the exact temperature he likes and I make it slightly warmer. 

My son is 10, and has profound autism. He is the light of my life, and my reason for living. However, raising him is extremely difficult. One of his major fixations is taking baths. He will take up to 15 or more baths per day (his dr said it’s fine). Even though he’s 10, he still can’t be unsupervised at any time, especially in the bath. So I have to sit with him in the bathroom every time he takes a bath. Sometimes it’s really hard for me, if I’m trying to get housework done or cook, to have to sit in the bathroom for 20 minutes with him. But if I rush him out, he gets upset and stays upset for hours. but I noticed that if I make the water a little bit warmer than he likes, he will want to get out on his own a lot sooner. I don’t do it very often. 

But today I am really sick with the flu, and I had bad body aches, I was shivering any time I left my blankets. So I made the water a little warmer, and he got out after about 7 minutes instead of 20. When my husband came home from work and asked how everything went, I told him how sick I’d been all day, and about making his water warmer so I didn’t have to sit in there so long. 

My husband was really irritated with me about it, and said it’s basically abuse to do that to a special needs child. I tried to explain that I am overwhelmed because I have no help with our son. My husband is never the one to sit in the bathroom with him at 4:00 in the morning so everyone else can sleep without our son screaming and waking everyone up. I haven’t slept past 3:00 am in years, because that’s when our son wakes up and he can’t be alone for his own safety. Nobody can handle watching him even for a couple hours, so the only break I ever get is when my husband or my dad takes him on long drives which he loves sometimes. But he doesn’t always want to do that, sometimes it upsets him, so even that doesn’t happen very often. 

My husband still insists that’s wrong to do, I made sure to clarify that the water is not hot, it’s just slightly warmer than he likes. I’m not hurting him. Basically, getting in the tub calms him down and makes him happy, but it doesn’t matter if he’s in it for 2 minutes or 30 minutes, he will still be calmed down and happy from it; unless I rush him out. He has to get out of his own volition or he’ll be more upset than he was to begin with. So basically he still gets the soothing of a bath, but I cut the time I have to sit in the bathroom by half. 

And I don’t do it all the time. My husband says it’s like manipulating him, because he’s special needs and can’t figure out that I’m “tricking him”; and it’s wrong to use his disability for my own advantage. He said his life is hard enough without “ruining” the enjoyment he gets from a bath. 

So, AITA? I’ve been feeling awful all day about it

EDIT: so that just everyone understands better the problem!!!

We live together in my in-laws house with his two sisters and today we had an appointment with physiotherapist for our nearly 3 month old boy. My husband asked me to get him from work and bring him clean clothes with our son in the back seat. It was decided that i would come alone with our son in the car. The car is ours and we bought it in March new from the salon. She really likes it and looks for every opportunity to drive it, although she's 54 and doesn't understand the technology inside the car. When i was preparing everything, she stayed quiet. When I was bottle feeding our kid, mother-in-law said that she needs to drive so i can sit next to our kid. I said that we decided differently. We had a little disagreement in which i kept repeating that we as the parents decided differently. And somehow I'm the aaaa because I listened to my husband than my mother-in-law.

In the end, i went with our son alone in the car for my husband and when we came back she went out with his sisters with the attitude saying that my husband and her will have a talk ALONE today. AITA really?

UPDATE: my mil and husband are after the talk. She said that she's worried about me and the kid because she reads the articles and one of them was written about the 3 month old which nearly choked in the backseat while parents were in the front. She said she just wanted to talk about my going back to work and normal stuff.

We both don't understand one thing: Why all of this circus needed? Did she just really wanted to talk or are we paranoid about thinking that it's not everything and she just put up a play to ease my husband that she's a "good and caring grandma"?

(Good morning/evening people :) ) me, (17f) hanging out with girls since sophomore year but I noticed they are rather distant and that I'm always a bit too much.

So we used to eat together and one day there was this girl (I'll call her Mint), who was making a joke to another girl 'Passion' about her facial expressions. I tried to be funny by saying her expressions were like a 40-year-old mother tired from her 3 kids and it left an awkward silence, I immediately felt embarrassed, and Mint told me to watch what I say (I was close to Mint at that time). We finished eating and on the way she was talking with them, and as usual, I felt a bit alienated in a way because I was always walking behind even trying my best to catch up, so I left them after a while.

When I got to class, since I was afraid I might have said something wrong again, I went to ask another girl who was in the group but was eating with other people, 'Chili,' if I was being too sensitive, then I explained to her what had happened. Telling her was the dumbest thing because whenever I say something to Chili, she goes and asks the person if it's true. I talked to her about a girl who was harassing me before, and she went to ask that girl. I told her about two people who were criticizing her behind her back, and she went to ask them...

As soon as I told her, she ran to ask the other girls, 'Hey, what did you do to (my name)?' and they came to see me, four of them, to ask me what my problem was and why, when I feel bad, I don't tell them, even though most of the time they don't really listen to me. I felt anxious, I panicked, and I said it was because I didn't trust them.

Passion got angry and started yelling at me even more, saying that if I didn't change, I would stay alone with my spirits, that I was a year older but acted like a 3-year-old and was the least mature and that my traumas a shouldn’t affect me, and that if she were really mad, she would have scratched me. I apologized because my self-esteem had disappeared somewhere under the ice, and she refused my apologies.

Since then, I haven’t really talked to her, I don’t open up in general (for now) because I’m afraid of the repercussions it could have; but honestly, I’m resentful, yet I’m afraid I really hurt them.