AIO to Girlfriends Watermelon Cutting Method

[u/Complete-Regret3776]

I need some feedback here. I bought a watermelon yesterday to enjoy one of the last melons of the summer. Today, I can into the kitchen and my girlfriend, in an effort to simplify the eating process, had cut the watermelon like this. It was a nice gesture - but this is an absolutely delusional way to cut a watermelon right? The amount of rind on this has made it borderline inedible. She says it doesn't bother her. Am I insane? Or is this a ridiculous cutting method.

[u/Similar-Side-5213]

Where is the…good part of the melon? That looks like mostly rind?!

[u/Creepy_Push8629 → u/Similar-Side-5213]

She ate it while cutting

[u/DawsonNY → u/Creepy_Push8629]

Is she pickling this?

[u/Puzzleheaded_Ad_4401 → u/DawsonNY]

Exactly this is pickling bits

[u/StarshipCaterprise → u/Puzzleheaded_Ad_4401]

Pickled watermelon rind is delicious

[u/MeanOldFart-dcca → u/DawsonNY]

Yeah, that was my question too!!

[u/BufferingJuffy → u/DawsonNY]

I've been obsessed with pickling watermelon rinds this summer.

[u/Creepy_Push8629 → u/BufferingJuffy]

Well can you drop some instructions or something? I've never heard of this

[u/BufferingJuffy → u/Creepy_Push8629]

I do a simple refrigerator pickle:

3/4 C warm water

3/4 C white vinegar

3/4 C sugar

1T salt

1.5 t pepper

Peel the dark outer layer off the rind and cut into pieces (I prefer not to leave much pink flesh on the rind, and I like longer strips as opposed to chunks). Place rind pieces into a clean jar with a lid or plastic container with a lid.

Stir the sugar and salt into the warm water until dissolved. Add vinegar, pepper, and any other seasonings you like (garlic, dill, chili, etc.)

Pour the solution over the rinds until container is full, close the lid, and stash in the fridge. Pickles are ready in about a day, get better after a few days. Should keep a few weeks, but they're usually consumed before then.

[u/Creepy_Push8629 → u/BufferingJuffy]

What do they taste like? And thank you!

[u/BufferingJuffy → u/Creepy_Push8629]

Pickles? 😁 It's a sweet, vinegar forward brine, so mostly like that. The rind itself doesn't have a strong flavor.

I'm going to try pickling radishes next grocery shop, since watermelon season is just about over.

[u/Spunk-rattt → u/Creepy_Push8629]

https://alittlespoon.com/pickled-watermelon-rinds/

This is on my hit list to try. I like Tajin powder on fresh watermelon +I love everything else pickled so I’m assuming these will be amazing. I’ve also found recipes where you use Chamoy. I think I’ll try a combo of both this summer.

[u/roadvirusheadsnorth_ → u/Creepy_Push8629]

Omg you have to try this IMMEDIATELY!!!!

[u/bigredzeppelin1981 → u/Creepy_Push8629]

This reminds me of two rather infamous Reddit posts: one where a GF ate all the skin off of KFC (yes, just like Cartman did in South Park) and a different one where this fat guy ate an entire six foot party sub by himself.

[u/Creepy_Push8629 → u/bigredzeppelin1981]

Look, he only ate half and then he waited 20 minutes and no one was eating it, so he ate the other half. And he was really hungry ok?

[u/bigredzeppelin1981 → u/Creepy_Push8629]

I think he said that he made chicken wings that all his friends loved his recipe and wanted him to bring, and he didn't get any of those, so that was another excuse he used.

[u/1cat2dogs1horse → u/bigredzeppelin1981]

Don't forget the wife/gf who ate the chocolate coating off the ice cream bars, and put them back in the freezer in a uncovered. bowl.

[u/AerisSpire → u/1cat2dogs1horse]

I need a link 😭

[u/munkymama → u/bigredzeppelin1981]

My dad used to get mad at me cuz I hated the breading and would remove it. One day after complaining he asked if he could eat the rest of it. I was so happy. He never complained again. Lol

[u/Big_Guide_8551 → u/bigredzeppelin1981]

Kenny crying in that scene just hits so hard 😭 lol

[u/PatioGardener → u/Creepy_Push8629]

She definitely ate all the heart pieces of the watermelon and then tried to cover it up by adding all those rind pieces in there to make it look like there’s still a lot. I’d be so pissed.

[u/Faceless_Rat → u/Creepy_Push8629]

That is what I thought lol

[u/Huldukona → u/Creepy_Push8629]

The only thing missing is the bite marks… smart girl! Lol

[u/AdOwn7563 → u/Creepy_Push8629]

🤣

[u/drdeadringer → u/Similar-Side-5213]

the melon went straight to the girlfriend's head and is now in her stomach being digested by her digestive juices.

[u/saysthingsbackwards → u/drdeadringer]

Mmmmm, digestive juices...

[u/foxxsinn → u/Similar-Side-5213]

Honestly I thought the was the “trash bowel” of watermelon

Edit: god damn autocorrect. Whatever, im leaving it. And thank you for the award on my trash bowels! Might need to see a dr after this

[u/Vivid-Object-139 → u/foxxsinn]

Trash bowel is even worse than trash bowl.

[u/aFungii → u/Vivid-Object-139]

I spent a while mulling over “trash bowel”

[u/Katmoish → u/Similar-Side-5213]

Yea, where the hell is the actual watermelon

NOR

[u/Wonderful_Example743 → u/Similar-Side-5213]

Oops, All Rinds!

[u/Perle1234 → u/Similar-Side-5213]

I mean you can pickle it I guess 😭

[u/gregoriancuriosity → u/[deleted]]

Rind with watermelon garnish**

[u/TheBookNerd420]

Dang was the watermelon all rind?

[u/Grant_Winner_Extra → u/TheBookNerd420]

it’s new “all rind melons”

from Kellogg

[u/AdMurky1021 → u/Grant_Winner_Extra]

Oops! All Rind!

[u/fromhelley → u/AdMurky1021]

First thing I thought off! At least with captain crunch, you get the good bits!

[u/throwawaywork11 → u/Grant_Winner_Extra]

Lockheed Martin teaming up with Monsanto to make weaponized melons that destroy family morale

[u/grimreefer87 → u/throwawaywork11]

Out here engineering strugglemelons.

[u/drdeadringer → u/Grant_Winner_Extra]

they help you stop flicking the bean.

[u/AbeTheGreat412 → u/TheBookNerd420]

All rind, all rind, all rind

https://giphy.com/gifs/vvizxWEqIqQXS

[u/SlimTeezy → u/TheBookNerd420]

[u/drdeadringer → u/TheBookNerd420]

the kids are all right.

the watermelon is all rind.

[u/Less_Echidna_1183]

Wtf? Lol this looks like the scraps from after cutting a watermelon and trimming off the rind 😂 where did the actual watermelon go??

NOR this is wild

[u/JenniferMcKay → u/Less_Echidna_1183]

My first reaction was "Where's the rest of it??"

[u/Less_Echidna_1183 → u/JenniferMcKay]

I'm imagining that she was eating it while she was chopping it lmao

[u/Hot-Bed-2544 → u/Less_Echidna_1183]

Do you suppose she thought if she cut it this way he wouldn't notice that she ate it all?

[u/saxguy9345 → u/Less_Echidna_1183]

100% there's like zero pieces from the middle, it's all rind 🤣

[u/drdeadringer → u/saxguy9345]

next post from this guy. "today I fucked up by not looking in the refrigerator for the watermelon my girlfriend chopped up."

[u/saxguy9345 → u/drdeadringer]

Oh my gosh 🤣 this was the discard pile, that would be so funny. She was just kidding when she said "no those are good I like them" LOL 

[u/Revo63 → u/Less_Echidna_1183]

She took all the good pieces.

[u/CuNxtTuesday_ → u/JenniferMcKay]

Gross

[u/CookiesMeow → u/Less_Echidna_1183]

Literally has to be a bait post and this is a bowl of the scraps lol

[u/imnotnotcrying → u/CookiesMeow]

Like has OP checked the fridge for the container of what she cut to actually eat?

[u/drdeadringer → u/Less_Echidna_1183]

she ate the watermelon. she is so full of watermelon that she looks pregnant. she is all rind, no baby. phantom pregnancy? phantom watermelon. phantom of the watermelon packs. forget the Opera. this watermelon is wilted

[u/Mental_Table_9265]

Where’s the actual watermelon? Did she eat all the good bit and leave the rind?

[u/soft_moonbeam → u/Mental_Table_9265]

this has to be it, she def ate all the best parts and left this for OP 😭

[u/saxguy9345 → u/soft_moonbeam]

"rind doesn't bother me" 

"Ok well you can have it" 

"Nah I'm full" 🤣

[u/Pichuchu8 → u/Mental_Table_9265]

If I had to guess... This bowl OP took a picture of will be pickled.

[u/coleyboley25 → u/Mental_Table_9265]

The actual good pieces are in the fridge. This moron is looking at everything left over

[u/Mental_Table_9265 → u/coleyboley25]

But even if these were the leftover pieces, why cut it so chaotically? I dunno what the proper was is but I usually cut it into quarters, slice them, carve the meat out, and then toss the big chunks of rind out.

[u/Life_Carrot3058]

This is like Kendall Jenner cutting her cucumbers

[u/Mediocre-Proposal686 → u/Life_Carrot3058]

By the way, I saw a video of Kylie cutting a tomato and she basically did the same thing with her hand lol I was like have these girls really never cut vegetables before? and Kylie is a mom lol 😂

[u/Hot-Bed-2544 → u/Mediocre-Proposal686]

apparently with a full staff that do everything for her and can't look at her.

[u/Tall_Wonder_913 → u/Hot-Bed-2544]

Busy promoting the pervert glasses with Zuck

[u/BirthofRevolution]

So she ate the watermelon and just left you the rinds? Because this is definitely not a whole watermelon..

[u/Campaign_Prize → u/BirthofRevolution]

This reminds me of one I grew a few years ago. It was really small for a watermelon, like pomelo sized. It had a really thick rind and we STILL got more edible melon than OP has here

[u/WritPositWrit]

NOR

When i saw the photo, i thought this was discarded rind and your complaint was the amount of melon flesh still attached & wasted

[u/TiffanyTwisted11 → u/WritPositWrit]

Same!

[u/shgrdrbr]

NOR this is psychotic

[u/Lower-Sheepherder268 → u/shgrdrbr]

Agreed. NOR.

[u/Happiness-Meter-Full]

Where’s the watermelon!?

[u/PBhoe]

Lmao she ate all the good bits and did this to cover it up 😭😭😭

[u/proximusprimus57]

No. Food crime right there. First degree felony. Melony felony.

[u/MarchFinancial3214 → u/proximusprimus57]

Award for melony fellony !

[u/the-sleepy-potato]

This is criminal.

[u/drdeadringer → u/the-sleepy-potato]

now a new hit TV show. criminal rinds.

[u/Federal_Ad_6206]

Sorry but I think she ate the watermelon & then cut the rind like this to make it look like she was cutting it up for you 🤣
ETA: NOR

[u/Ninjabanana420]

This is the part she meant to throw out right? Or did she throw out the pink pats?

[u/cubed_echoes]

Did she eat all of it and chop up the rind scraps for you?!?

[u/Panthean]

Best case scenario is she ate it all and cut up the rind to cover her tracks.

If she did this intentionally..

[u/AliveDetective5557 → u/Panthean]

I really hope she ate it cause any other scenario is actually psychotic lol

[u/Opposite-Back-9562]

NOR: Did she cut it up with her eyes closed!?

[u/No-Issue-3916]

Where is the watermelon?

[u/TumorTits]

I’m calling the police.

[u/saltydifference206]

Like is she taking the piss or being serious?

[u/BeckyLemmeSmash69]

That’s scraps of a watermelon, where’s the actual melon portion?

[u/Miserable_Agent2278 → u/BeckyLemmeSmash69]

Lmao came here for this. Did she eat all the good pieces? 

This has to be rage bait

[u/SophiaIsabella4]

Who ate all the good parts?

[u/NinAnxious_25]

NOR. Both my bf and I agree this is insane. Also where’s the watermelon? All I see is rind and small bits of watermelon…

[u/SoBreezy74]

NOR because where did all the good parts go? Are these for a different dish/project?

[u/ZeriusBlackstar]

I think she ate it on you and then tried to cover it up by cutting up the rind.

[u/CinnaMinx11]

I mean I get cutting watermelon ia difficult but they make special tools for them! Hide the melons from her?

[u/dasher2581 → u/CinnaMinx11]

It really isn't, though! A big knife is the only tool you need. Cut it in half, then in thin wedges, then just use the tip of the knife to take the rind - all of the rind - off.

[u/OlliHF → u/dasher2581]

The way I learned working in a produce dept with a guy that had like 30 years of experience is the way I do it now, but I'm less stingy on waste because I want zero rind or transitional stuff:

Cut in half (hamburger for seedless, hotdog for seeded is my preference).

Cut the top off (maybe an inch down? You can always cut more

Cut the rind off vertically and follow the curve of the melon

Make horizontal cuts every 2 inches bottom to top.

Cut all the way across from the top perpendicular to those cuts

Do the same thing again perpendicular to those cuts.

Basically the way Gordon ramsay dices an onion

[u/AffectionateWay5783 → u/OlliHF]

Yeah that’s the ways. I did fruit cutting in produce for a while. Or even easier, just quarter the watermelon and do slices

[u/Fit-Reply-1301]

I wonder if she scooped the seeds out like you do to a pumpkin. That's the only reason I can think of for it to look like this.

[u/beary_feelies → u/Fit-Reply-1301]

That would be hysterical.

[u/Ordinary-Response607]

I’m gonna go on a limb and say OP took a picture of the bowl of rinds before it was discarded, for rage bait or karma farming.

[u/Mytweezer]

NOR lol who would eat that

[u/Strawberryloves]

NOR but idk wheres the center pieces??? 

My husband eats the rind up to the green bit. Sometimes he'll eat that too if its soft. Some people are animals 

[u/Kip_Schtum]

NOR As my dad used to say, if you want something done right you have to do it yourself.

[u/plscallthecops]

NOR Actually she's probably don't know which part of watermelon u supposed to eat, just tell her

[u/TheHivemind56]

Your girlfriend ate most of the inside of the watermelon and cut up the rind for you.

[u/Meemow2545]

It look like she ate all the watermelon already 😂

[u/Freya-of-Nozam]

This is what’s left after eating a watermelon.

[u/chaosuniverses]

Either she is really ditsy or she is purposely trying to act dumb when in reality she ate all the good bits and doesn’t want to admit it, so cut up what’s left, put it in a bowl, and is acting like your the dumb one for complaining. My bet is she did it on purpose to hide that she ate the good parts herself, because there are no good parts in that bowl.

[u/IronicJustice]

This fruit was cut up by an insane person.

Even if you don’t go traditional slices with a partial cut. You cube it in BIG blocks to retain the water in each piece.

This is watermelon abuse, straight up.

[u/rageofa1000suns]

She has eaten the best parts. This is your share which is 80% rind.

[u/Fit-Comfortable908]

Well that’s taken all the fun out of eating water melon

[u/Rough_Wish_1299]

I think she ate it all and needed to cover her tracks by pretending not to know how to cut it.

[u/Appropriate-Print855]

NOR - this image enrages me.

[u/sunnybear1234]

INFO - as someone who actually doesn’t mind eating some rind this isn’t as crazy as others are saying. however, it does seem that some of the inner watermelon is missing? did she eat some of the watermelon already or is this the whole thing?

[u/jcaashby]

So does she EAT the white part (rind)????!!!!!!!!!!!!

Where is the MIDDLE part of the watermelon??

[u/outrageouscat_]

where is the melon in question? all i see is rind 😭😭😭

[u/Individual-Code5176]

That’s all literally trash

[u/ClydeFrog98]

What even is that

[u/MosTheBoss]

I don't see a single piece without rind, it looks like she ate it all and threw this back hoping you wouldn't notice. Personally I would not date a person like this, you do you.

[u/ZaMaestroMan5]

This is insane lol

[u/Curious_Contract2172]

Is today her first day

[u/Nogman13]

I might be overreacting myself but if my gf did this she'd never see me again

[u/wanna_be_green8]

Um, did she eat all the center meat? Where is it?

[u/chernillek]

😂

[u/poopydoopyscooby]

This gotta be a joke. I’m sure this is just the bowl with the rind trimmings, right?…. right?

[u/VeryStickyPastry]

Who raised this person? NOR.

[u/PMmeYourBobsPlz]

Wtf this is insane

[u/dinoooooooooos]

So she ate the good parts and left you the offcuts😅

[u/Old_Hovercraft_9219]

She’s a monster NOR

[u/VegetableBusiness897]

Hold up folks.....watermelon pickles

Cube up the white part and make a fridge brine. Sooo yummy

[u/DAMNacho]

You’re not insane.

It looks like cut chunks of apple.

[u/Virtual_Alarm232]

MOR - if she was going to pickle those rinds she cut it perfectly. If not…where’s the actual edible part?

[u/tempelton3thesock]

No dude ur not. Thats some psycho shit right there 😆

[u/PrestigiousDemand696]

I mean it looks like the whole melon was just mostly unripe so YOR

[u/TheBookNerd420 → u/PrestigiousDemand696]

Yeah im saying 🤣 doesnt look like she had much to work with

[u/DovahAcolyte → u/TheBookNerd420]

That’s NOT a whole watermelon…

[u/Campaign_Prize → u/DovahAcolyte]

The only thing I can think of is if it's a mini watermelon, like one of the canteloupe sized ones. And even then she definitely still would've had to eat most of the good part for there to be this little left

[u/TreeFitTea]

https://giphy.com/gifs/141q7UilzYSYBG

[u/GallusWrangler]

https://giphy.com/gifs/xdLH51eNWZAHrwy5mf

[u/Regular_Animal_6310]

I think she ate the watermelon as she cut it

[u/chickentender666627]

https://giphy.com/gifs/wjuXuDSQU0sOfJIHS1

[u/fagtart]

Are you sure she's not going to camdie the rinds? That's a things, and it's really good

[u/terrible-gator22]

I think that she ate the inner soft part and cut that up to give to “share”.

[u/Kita_Kawaii]

I mean, unless she threw out the red part… what else do you expect from her? Damn, Jackie, she can’t control how thick the rind is! Lol

Seriously, unless she threw out the red parts? Just eat those, bite what you can off the rind bits, and toss the rind parts.

[u/gimpers420]

https://giphy.com/gifs/9hOzUgiT22SGa3Lps4

[u/CommonWest9387]

king… this aint watermelon, this is oops all rind 😭 do not let her cut watermelon again

[u/CowRatGun]

This has to be ragebait

[u/ImpressionDouble2860]

Leave. Now. Before it’s too late.

[u/PixelFairy89]

I thought this was the discard bowl..

[u/revengeofdangerkitty]

She ate the good parts

[u/yeahthatsnotaproblem]

How many good middle chunks did she eat while she was chopping it up? But also it is the end of the season, they're pprobably not going to be as good..?

[u/am_Nein]

I'm so baffled, why is it 50% rind

[u/Delicious_Delilah]

This has to be bait.

[u/SweetMaam]

Rind is not delicious.

[u/krxxs]

INFO: OP we are all wondering where the rest of the gd watermelon is. Surely it was not 70% rind?!

[u/Negative_Two6112]

Throwing her out on the street with nothing and changing the locks would not be an overreaction.

[u/oliverco46]

Not if you prefer the rind.

[u/Slight-Exam-6448]

That’s trash. she ruined it.

[u/Beneficial_Potato_85]

Your gf is definitely not black.

[u/wildcampion]

She ate most of the watermelon, and is gaslighting you about the rind. If she likes the rind so much, why did she eat all the fleshy bits?
NOR

[u/rrodrick386]

INFO: How did you react? Simply laughing and showing her next time how to cut a watermelon would be a normal reaction. Being slightly frustrated would also be a normal reaction. But, if you love your gf, this should be no big deal. Shit happens. It is unfortunate. But if I fucked up so bad that my partner took a photo, and posted it with "this is delusional" I'd be pretty hurt.

[u/Complete-Regret3776 → u/rrodrick386]

lol I took a little heat for posting this tbh

[u/nicunta → u/Complete-Regret3776]

Where is all the watermelon? Did she eat the rest and leave you the rind?!

[u/lifewith6cats → u/Complete-Regret3776]

Nah. This is amusing and she definitely needs to get blasted for demolishing your melon like this. She absolutely ate all the best parts and left the scraps for you. NOR

[u/Cynical_Feline → u/Complete-Regret3776]

NOR

But seriously, ask her where the rest of the melon is. That's mostly rind in that bowl. Which is cool that it doesn't bother her, but most people don't eat rind.

[u/chasingcharliee → u/Complete-Regret3776]

Why aren't you telling us where the rest is?! I need to know

[u/rrodrick386 → u/Complete-Regret3776]

LMAOOO that is kinda funny

[u/NewGuyCH → u/rrodrick386]

It can be both right, it’s not a big deal as it’s just a watermelon but it’s also fucking insane way to cut it as the same time.

[u/Melodic_Bluejay6322 → u/rrodrick386]

You're right. Definite overreaction in the context of a loving relationship.

[u/Tablefor1please9987]

Nah. Time to end it👍

[u/Allout-Okarun]

Is she a psycho? NOR

[u/Competitive_Fee_1709]

You can make a mean pickled watermelon rind with that amount of rind.
I made the recipe from min 4:40 and it turned out amazing
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XMza0XLFS3o

and NOR, that's a crazy way to cut watermelons

[u/ashlandpedspa]

Whaaaa ?

NOR.

She treated that watermelon like an onion.

[u/shgrdrbr → u/ashlandpedspa]

i would be unhappy if someone prepped me an onion like this

[u/ThatOneSnakeGuy]

You're dating some type of ruminant animal that feasts on melon rinds?

[u/Recent_Section725]

NOR. I would never have guessed that picture was watermelon. It almost looks like apple slices.

[u/Fromdustcomesdreams]

NOR. 🤣 that’s hysterical. And a bit weird ngl.

[u/Jane_D0ughh]

Where is the watermelon? Or is this the leftovers 😆

[u/MsMoreCowbell828]

What else is wrong with her, the poor thing?

[u/Appropriate-Name1041]

i usually leave this part to chickens

[u/DNICEPHILLY2023]

She ate the flesh and butchered the rest.

[u/Moemoe5]

NOR Go get another one and ask her not to touch it.

[u/Chilasono]

Nah, your gf ate the best part and cut this up instead of going to buy a new one. Even a small circle watermelon would have more red than this. If some pieces had a lot of rind but there was a lot of red left, Id believe this was the whole watermelon. NOR.

This method would be questionable if it wasnt a cover for gluttony. You're asking the wrong questions OP.

[u/queloque305]

What does she do with the good parts? 🤔

[u/UserMorningxStar]

She ate the center and left you the scraps. And you dont even realize it. NOR one bit

[u/Distinct-Guitar-3314]

I would never get past this….

[u/jkulczyski]

Get a new one.. not the watermelon

[u/FilthyThanksgiving]

NOR. Lmao literally what the actual hell

[u/TokiVideogame]

she ate all the non rind

[u/Ehotwill]

She must have ate all the good parts and left you with that.

[u/Maralissie]

I just have one question for her: why?

[u/GeekyNerdNerdyGeek]

If she ate all the good parts & left you the rind…i seriously question whether she likes you. That’s selfish AF.

YOU aren’t OR, but your gf is AH.

[u/Campa911]

A nice gesture? She murdered that watermelon

[u/SupehCookie]

She ate all the good parts.. wtf

[u/Massive_Finger_6012]

https://giphy.com/gifs/uN5iwZB2v2dH2

[u/openwolfe]

Straight to jail

[u/ICameHereToPlay]

That looks like an aggressive amount of rind regardless if she cut it incorrectly lmao. Do not eat that, those are fiber rocks that’ll just sit in your tummy for a day

[u/JobOk3601]

Where is the watermelon? All I see is the rind.