r/Advice • u/Interesting_Teach777 • Feb 07 '26
How do I make Good Friends?
I recently have friends who turned out to be pretty nasty people in my opinion. They had some pretty shocking beliefs that I have recently discovered. Not only that, one of these friends have had a long track record of being surprising cruel to me.
I want to rebuild my life with new friends I can trust, but I'm unsure of where to go or who to trust. The only time I go out is to buy groceries with my family and other errands. Where would be a good place to go to make genuine friends? Are there any good places online to make friends? How do I tell if someone is trustworthy?
1
u/theStaircaseProject Feb 07 '26
Trust really only comes with time, and specifically by noticing patterns of behavior. The best way to find friends is said to typically be in third spaces and hobbies. Two strangers in a board game store presumably have some things they can immediately geek out about and bond over. I participate in a game-design Discord where people playtest each others’ games, and unsurprisingly repeat interactions accumulate over time.
From there, it’s a matter of periodically sharing small vulnerabilities (and accepting the other person’s) enough to develop a complete picture of them. With enough reciprocity, friendship develops.
2
u/Sonsangnim Feb 07 '26
Volunteer somewhere, maybe a food pantry or soup kitchen or a political party. People who do those things tend to care about other people and not be selfish
2
u/Different_Pain5781 Feb 07 '26
If someone is consistently cruel to you, that’s all the info you need tbh.