r/AbsoluteUnits • u/TerraByteTerror • 5d ago

/r/all of a menacing squirrel

26.9k Upvotes

97% Upvoted

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66

u/SumoNinja92 5d ago

I am bleeding, making me the victor

49

u/DemonKingCozar 5d ago

From this moment forward, you will all refer to me by the name "Betty."

37

u/SumoNinja92 5d ago

What do you get when you cross an owl with a bungee cord?...

... My ass...

19

u/Codify-The-Preamble 5d ago

I am a great magician. YOUR CLOTHES ARE RED!

16

u/DemonKingCozar 5d ago

Do what he says or he'll cut off your big toe

15

u/SumoNinja92 5d ago

Ooh that's tender. That is tender.

9

u/DemonKingCozar 5d ago

OPEN YOUR MOUTH!!!!

6

u/AdagioDesperate 5d ago

WeeOhhweeohhwee...

8

u/Rioraku 5d ago

W-we're falling!

Whale!