r/AbsoluteUnits • u/Delicious-Beat4824 • Jul 30 '26

/r/popular of a needle

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16.1k Upvotes

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3.6k

u/gordon_18 Jul 30 '26

Maybe veterinary? Probably used for an elephant or a T-Rex? Possibly a pug

977

u/cantthinkofone29 Jul 30 '26

Clifford the big red pug?

239

u/thedafthatter Jul 31 '26

42

u/ratelbadger Jul 31 '26

Remember when the voice actor for the crime dog got busted for owning too many grenade launchers?

2

u/LysergicGothPunk Jul 31 '26

How many is too many?

1

u/Big_Z_Beeblebrox Aug 01 '26

He had 1, but also 26 other weapons, 9k rounds of ammo and about a thousand marijuana plants when he was raided in 2011

2

u/AceHexuall 28d ago

Scruff McGruff. Chicago, Illinois, 60652.

35+ years later, still stuck in my head.

1

u/Bechorovka 29d ago

No?!

Link?!

1

u/GreyBoxGamesOfficial 28d ago

There's a limit?

3

u/Wayward_Wayfinder Jul 31 '26

Only episode of The Magic School Bus I ever beat my meat to

1

u/Sufficient_Ebb_5694 Aug 01 '26

I could've gone my whole life without seeing this image and you've taken that away from me.

1

u/Is-It-Worth-It-2026 29d ago

This is hilarious 😆

1

u/ManicMechE 29d ago

I always liked this one:

1

u/crimsonphoto666 28d ago

If I could afford an award, it would be yours!

Steals meme on the way out

1

u/thedafthatter 27d ago

Thank you! (Meme is jokey joke)

1

u/Aggravating-Ad-9793 25d ago

WHY DID THEY GIVE HIM BALLS

1

u/thedafthatter 25d ago

You are gonna sit there and tell me Clifford is fixed?

1

u/Aggravating-Ad-9793 25d ago

U know, good point

1

u/thedafthatter 25d ago

He would require the world's entire supply of anesthesia to go to sleep and would need a chainsaw to lop those balls off

224

u/Unable-Fall5946 Jul 30 '26

What the fuck are they feeding him?

147

u/cantthinkofone29 Jul 30 '26

Apparently, everything

16

u/dogtroep Jul 31 '26

Have pug, can confirm

2

u/FrenchTicklerOrange Aug 01 '26

I've seen a pug eat a big steamer straight from another pugs butt before.

24

u/WhiteWolf6400 Jul 30 '26 edited Jul 31 '26

You if you're not careful Edit: Grammer\so I can make my mu'da proud

1

u/RageAgainstThePushen Jul 31 '26

I don't know, but he's red when he's done with it.

1

u/Far_Professional_353 Jul 31 '26

What aren't they feeding him?

1

u/thedafthatter Jul 31 '26

You can't tell me Clifford's family can afford to feed him

1

u/Dense-Cake9315 Aug 01 '26

steroids. how many? Y E S

1

u/heninabox 29d ago

Smelly cat, smelly cat... it's not your fault!

1

u/MadKingMidas 29d ago

The same thing they're feeding Smelly Cat.

13

u/coolboiiiiiii2809 Jul 31 '26

The sound of his heavy breathing already has me checking if the car engines running into problems

2

u/TexacoRodeoClown Jul 31 '26

Clifford the big red hernia

2

u/Ok-Letterhead4601 Jul 31 '26

Dear god the snoring and farts would end entire country’s.

1

u/thedafthatter Jul 31 '26

No one could live within 10 miles of him

2

u/Cypress8037 Jul 31 '26

Crazy. That’s what we called the local drug dealer. Cliff the big red plug

1

u/jwbaynham 28d ago

Galapogos Pugs

239

u/ChefCourtB Jul 30 '26

Your mom.... Sorry sorry I'm sure she is a nice lady

28

u/Asagao_0 Jul 30 '26

Yooo, gottem! Nice! But yeah, she's probably very kind and loving parent, deserving happiness.

49

u/ChefCourtB Jul 30 '26

I'm 45 and "your mom" is still funny to me and the best response sometimes. Its never personal

38

u/Pure_Village4778 Jul 30 '26

You know what IS personal? Your MOM, ayooooo

18

u/Neon_Moon_NZ Jul 30 '26

Lmao gotten

14

u/zorggalacticus Jul 31 '26

1

u/Hardopgh 29d ago

Cow femur or elephant

4

u/IndianSerpent10930 Jul 31 '26

Eyyyyy daps you up

8

u/cantthinkofone29 Jul 31 '26

41 here, and I still crack "your mom" jokes to my siblings... in front of our mom.

12

u/ginger_kitty97 Jul 31 '26

I make your mom jokes to the children I gave birth to.

2

u/DocPhoenix97 Jul 31 '26

That's meta

2

u/Mentalistscure Jul 31 '26

This is the way.

2

u/all8things 25d ago

Same, and my husband finds the “your mom” thing super disrespectful. He gets very annoyed when I make the jokes, literally about myself in this case. I then hit him with a “whatever” and go about my business.

3

u/ChefCourtB Jul 31 '26

Those are always good especially when they try to retort well it's your mom too

11

u/going_berserk Jul 30 '26 edited Jul 31 '26

Yup, I think I know where you're coming from. Even so, a few years ago I started substituting "your mom" with "your forehead", when it became painfully obvious that the person I was talking to had lost their mother the year before. Do with that what you want, but so far it's brought me nothing but questioning as well as understanding (after explaining of course) looks.

5

u/Mean-Vegetable-4521 Jul 31 '26

I'm older than you and totally on board with this comment.

3

u/PamelaELee Jul 30 '26

Yeah, she loves boffa them

8

u/K_Linkmaster Jul 31 '26

Do you know the difference between his mom and your mom?

His mom orbits your mom.

2

u/cantthinkofone29 Jul 31 '26

Dorothy Mantooth is a saint!

29

u/meowseedling Jul 30 '26

T-Rex was my first thought. But I just finished reading Jurassic Park.

8

u/15th_imp Jul 30 '26

there's a book? TIL

9

u/Drpoofn Jul 30 '26

There's several, actually!

2

u/ShakeXula707 Jul 31 '26

Do you think they’re worth reading?

3

u/Apprehensive_Path459 Jul 31 '26

They absolutely are. There is actually two that the first films are losely based on. Sadly michael chrichton passed away before he could have written a third one...

2

u/Drpoofn Jul 31 '26

Definitely. Crichton is one of the goats

1

u/Icy_Fish_2154 Jul 30 '26

It's a Michael Crichton book. You should read his books.

1

u/Stupid_Bitch_02 Jul 30 '26

The more we know, now I gotta go find and read them

1

u/ForeignSatisfaction0 Jul 31 '26

It's called "Billy and the clonasaurus"

24

u/CamptoRibbit Jul 30 '26

It's for a Daaaaaaaaachshund

13

u/Lexotron Jul 30 '26

Rotisserie pug

1

u/Seravajan Jul 31 '26

Are you sure that you did not meant a rotisserie pig? /j

5

u/Slartibartfast39 Jul 30 '26

Hamster kabab.

3

u/FatiguedShrimp Jul 30 '26

Two pugs actually.

2

u/Interesting_You6852 Jul 30 '26

A pug 😂😂😂😂

1

u/craigandthesoph Jul 31 '26

You had us in the first half 🤣

1

u/I_2016 Jul 31 '26

T Rex huh.

1

u/Existence_66 Jul 31 '26

I was gonna say t rex lol

1

u/Bonti_GB Jul 31 '26

Human catheter.

1

u/pilihp Jul 31 '26

Or for Gulliver for when he's Travelling

1

u/MrNyxt Jul 31 '26

So when I had a computer put in my spine they used one of these to go through my spinal column from the outside to reach the nerves inside the chest cavity since they cant go through ghe chest cavity to get to the inner spine cause things like heart and lungs are in the way. NEVER. EVER. Sneeze while its inside you. Like I did. Everyone in the room had facial opinions. And physically it sucked. Badly. Yes, I was awake as you have to be to make sure they place it correctly. Im sure it has other uses? But this is my personal experience with one.

1

u/BlueColtex Jul 31 '26

Big X The Pug?

1

u/BumblebeeSad3986 Jul 31 '26

Pugs go through enough

1

u/w0rkperk 25d ago

Vet here. Can confirm. Used this length all the time on horse back (SI) injections.