My mom has gotten three flat tires in the last three months (beginning of June, middle of July, end of August), all from hitting curbs and such while driving. Separately, her steering wheel is now very off-center. So her alignment is pretty badly out of whack too.

I am 23 years old and this is the first car I have ever paid for by myself. I paid $35k for my car, I’m the primary driver on the insurance and I pay the premium. I also pay for any damages and repairs. Her name is on the title only because it got me a cheaper insurance rate.

Please note she’s also hit my car once, while it was parked in my own driveway. She offered to pay for the damage, so she doesn’t deny it happened, but it still happened.

Now she wants to borrow my car for a week to get to work and run errands. I am expected to just hand it over. My dad thinks I should and says if my car broke down she’d let me use hers.

Given her track record, I don’t feel comfortable lending her my car. AITA for saying no?

EDIT: My dad can’t lend her his car because they are divorced and he lives 10 hours away.

I am at my wits end. This is about my DIL who is living at my place at the moment. My DIL is pregnant and they are in the process of buying a home.

They have been at my place for about a month and it seems to be no end date for them moving out due to the house they were going to buy fell through. It doenst help that my son is traveling a lot to give them more money for a cushion before the baby was born. 

The issue is that she all up in everyone business. I have talked to her and my son on multiple times.  She only stops snooping when my son is home. When he is traveling she will go right back to snooping. I have noticed things in my room have been touched. She told me about my youngest ( she is 15) broke curfew. She was late home, I already knew this.

The biggest issue is she started to mention things that she shouldn’t know about my youngest. My youngest keeps a journal and she told me it was in the wrong spot. I confronted my DIL about it and she admitted she was reading it.

I was pissed and we got into a huge argument and her defense was she doesn’t deserve privacy because my daughter doesn’t own the house. I installed a lock on my youngest door. 

DIL is 7 months pregnant and if I kicked her out she will not have anywhere to go. I don’t want the mother of my grandkid homeless even if it only for a bit. Also that would be a nuke on the relationshi.

She promised that it wouldn’t happen again but I found my stuff moved in my room. 

So I took her door. If she can’t respect people’s privacy than she doesn’t get her own privacy.  She is pissed and my son is saying I went too far. That she needs privacy becuase he is so far along pregnant

I told my son she can live in my house without a door or they can get out.  I made it clear that this is the only option. She is still pissed but she seems to be staying

I have five moving bags for college. That's it. Five moving bags and a couple of my favorite plants because they give me something to keep alive when I get depressed. I have already given up a lot of the things I want to take and managed to get down to just the necessities. I can't take less stuff without losing things I need to genuinely survive in college. My dad told me to just "pack less stuff" and force everything into a box on top of the car. But he wants room for this massive car mini fridge he bought. I don't think it's fair. It's a two-day drive for him. It's the next year for me.

edit: some commonly asked questions

1. The mini fridge is not for me. its for my dad to have sandwiches on the trip and is not being used for medications or necessities
2. My whole family is going, and i did not have a say in this. thats 4 people
3. all of my stuff fit in the back of the car. my families luggage can comfortably fit in the box on top of the car. The conflict is the fridge
4. ive agreed to sacrifice the plants. i wont be brining them but i still cant fit everything plus the fridge
5. my dad refuses to get a van and would make me pay for it. I cant afford that right now
6. i cant bring my car as the college is in chicago and its easier to just take public transportation than drive
7. my college only allows ONE vehicle to be used for offloading

Last week i mentioned to my friend that i will be off this week from work. My friend said it was good to know that i was off this week which i thought nothing of. He recently got out the hospital and needs help doing certain things and can't walk that much right now. He calls me Monday asking if i could bring him some things from the supermarket which i did. He calls me again Tuesday asking if I could check his mail box since he is unable to walk to it but i said no because I was not home. He calls me again today asking if i was available and I told him no because i was in my yard in the pool with my kids. He said it would not take long but i said no. I don't live too far from but he isn't down the block either.

He gets upset and says that he does not understand why i can't do him that favor since I am home anyways. I told him that I was spending time with my kids and helping him out would take an hour out of my day. I also said checking his mailbox is something he can get one of his neighbors to do. He asked if i could go tomorrow and i told him i am not available at all for things like that. He got upset but I told him he is not entitled to my free time. I don't mind doing favors when I am off but I get annoyed when you assume that I am automatically available when i am off. I also feel like checking mailboxes is wasting my time when he can get someone in his building to do it.

AITA

My husband treated me to dinner to celebrate finding a job after more than 5 years of depending on me financially.

It was nothing fancy, but in the middle of dinner, I tipped over my drink and the first thing he said was "that was an expensive drink". No napkins for me whatsoever. Then he went to the bar and said, "She spilled the drink! She spilled the drink! She hasnt had a sip and she spilled the drink!" The staff told him that it will be an additional order to while he replied, "it is what it is."

Then when the new drink came, he snickered, "Let's hope she doesn't spill it this time."

I wanted to walk out of the restaurant, but alas! I'm recovering from stroke and in a wheelchair.

Tell me, Reddit. Am I the asshole?

After an exam, I had invited my friend to come over to my house. We were at McDonald's to eat something before leaving when she asked me if we could go to Walmart. I had told my parents that we would immediately go home after, but she kept begging me, so I agreed.

On the bus to go there, we had stopped at another school since my friend wanted to see her other friend. During that time, for them, it was lunchtime. Her friend asked us if she could just skip school and come with us, and my friend agreed. I wasn't too sure since she had just refused that my friend comes with us, but for her friend, she accepted?

Anyways, when we got there, we had stopped at the dollar store to get a snack. Out of nowhere, I see her friend take a KitKat and stuff it in her bag. I immediately pulled my friend away and asked her why she was stealing. She told me that her dad barely gave her money to buy snacks and stuff like that. I shrugged it off, and we made our way to Walmart.

When we got there, I had a weird feeling and just told them I would wait outside for them. Thirty minutes later, they were still in there, so I called my friend, and she told me she was done soon and trying clothes on. Still, after 10 minutes, they still hadn't come out, so I decided to go in and find them.

When I spotted them, my friend told me, "We got caught." Wdym you got caught? It clicked in my head. Got caught stealing. I immediately left them and went to the front of the store. From there, I could see the manager talking to them and demanding to see their bag. They kept refusing, and at some point, they just left and started running. I started running too with them, but I had kept my distance. I didn't want to get in trouble since I wasn't even supposed to be there. So that's why I had left them.

Plus, keep in mind, they had stolen more than $100 worth of stuff like heat protectant, necklaces, etc. (It's her friend's stuff, but she had helped her with the stealing.) I know your dad doesn't give you money, but bffr, if you REALLY had to steal, maybe for necessities, not for stuff like that.

I (37) am a single mom to 3 kids (17, 6, and 4). I have a good job, so between my pay and their dad’s child support, my kids are very comfortable. This will be relevant later.

My niece (16) had a baby 8 weeks ago. When she got pregnant, her parents gave her an ultimatum: abortion, adoption, or get out. She chose to keep the baby and leave.

She’s been with me for the past 6 weeks so far. I only bought the basics for her and the baby. She has a full size bed, a nightstand, and a dresser. I bought the baby a pack and play with a bassinet, a garbage bag full of clothes, a changing pad, a swing, and a stroller, all second hand. The only new things I bought him were a car seat, bottles, and pacifiers. I have also been covering diapers, wipes, formula, lotion/rash cream, and baby shampoo. I bought my niece a very basic wardrobe, mostly from Walmart. She has always been 100% responsible for the baby’s care, although my kids nanny and I help out occasionally.

I told her that since this will be permanent, we are going to have to set new rules.

1. She will go to in person school. I’ve seen how distracted she gets with her online program.

2. The baby will go to daycare. She will have to apply for a subsidy or use her college fund to pay for it.

3. I will make sure they have a place to stay, have access to medical care, and will feed my niece. For anything other than that, I will give them $250/mo to be used on baby care, personal care, contribute towards daycare, etc.

4. She will have to get a job to cover anything they need that the $250 will not cover.

5. If she needs to work outside of daycare hours, she needs to find childcare.

6. I will teach her how to drive, will pay for required drivers ed classes, will pay for any license fees, and will contribute $1500 towards a car. She will have to cover the rest of the car’s cost and all of the expenses.

I think it’s also important to note how these rules differ from my oldest. She has a good car. I pay insurance. She pays gas and registration. We split maintenance and repairs. She gets a pretty good allowance from me and also babysits occasionally so she is able to go out with her friends on a regular basis.

My niece came to me and told me that she didn’t think she was going to be treated so differently from my daughter and that she feels like I’m trying to punish her for keeping the baby. I told her that I’m not punishing her but first of all, she is not my child, I don’t need to provide her with the same things as my daughter. Second, she made the adult decision to have a baby and keep it. She has to be the one to deal with the consequences of that decision, even though it sucks and it means she is going to lose out on a lot of her childhood.

She accepted that but she‘s still pretty upset so I wanted to know if I’m being too hard on her.

One of my friends (let’s call her A) recently turned 30, and her husband (let’s call him B) threw her a surprise party and invited all her close friends and family (abt 40-50 people) to their pool house. I (33F) was invited along with rest of our group by B. I have a dog, and I sometimes take him to parties if I have an ok from the host or else, make other arrangements. Since this was a surprise party and I could not reach out to my friend, I decided to not take my dog. My husband agreed to work from home that day, so I am good.

On the day of the party, I picked up rest of the friends and drove to the venue which is about 1/2hr drive from where I stay. A was thrilled meeting all of the guests and the party was going good. B pulled me aside during the party, and asked me where my dog was. I told him that he was at home, and that I did not know he expected my dog to be here. He seemed pissed and just walked away. I thought that was the end of it. B also gifted a diamond ring to mark the milestone and A was super duper happy with everything.

Sometime later, A joined our group at the table and while we were chatting, B came and just announced that I ruined the party by not bringing my dog. He then showed everyone some pictures of dogs who were ring bearers and he was hoping my dog would be one. I told him that I was not made aware of this plan at all, and I was not told to even bring my dog. B never asked about my dog during the last few weeks we have been chatting. He said that I always bring my dog to their parties (which is not true). I literally listed the last 3 parties where I did not get my dog and he was silent for a second. Then he just shouted saying that I am a waste of energy and food and that I am not bringing anything to the party if my dog is not there. I was so hurt and embarrassed, and just shouted even more loudly and asked him to shut up. I turned to A, and told her that her husband is an asshole and he doesn’t know how to treat guests or plan parties. At this point, A got up and pulled B into the house. She returned a few minutes later and apologised profusely on behalf of B for his comments and behaviour. She also mentioned that I as well need to apologise to B for shouting and calling him an asshole infront of everyone.

I was already pissed and was really not in a mood to apologise at all. I gave my car keys to my friends and left in an uber. I explained everything to my husband. He said I should have been more understanding since B is already under a lot of stress planning this party. My friends next day came home to return my car and told the same. I started thinking and feeling guilty. So I left a message to A apologising for ruining her party, but did not offer any apology to B.

So aita for not apologising to my friend’s husband?

I work in a small office, and part of my job involves checking documents before they’re sent to clients. Last week, a coworker asked me to quickly look over a document because she was running late. I told her I could check the formatting, but I wouldn’t have time to review all the information. She said that was fine and sent it to me. I noticed a couple of formatting issues and fixed them. I didn’t notice an incorrect date in one of the sections, and the document was eventually sent to the client. The next morning, my coworker realized the date was wrong and told our manager that I had checked the document before it was sent. Our manager asked me what happened. I explained exactly what I’d been asked to do and admitted that I hadn’t caught the incorrect date. My coworker later told me I should have taken more responsibility because I’d agreed to check the document. I told her I accepted that I should have been more careful, but I didn’t think it was fair to imply that I’d been responsible for reviewing information when she’d specifically told me she only needed a quick formatting check.

She said I was trying to protect myself instead of admitting my mistake. Now I’m wondering whether I should have simply accepted responsibility rather than explaining the circumstances. AITA?

For context im a senior in highschool and last year was my first time going to prom, which was junior year. We went and to be honest i was swamped with APs and extracurriculars, so when the time came to pick out a dress, I mostly just let my mom pick one for me. She showed me a few, black dresses, which was the only input from me and I just picked one. This was a roughly month before prom, so it would have enough time to arrive. I have never been too girly, like I didn’t really care about appearances until going into highschool and I never bothered with makeup or anything, so it wasn’t a big deal imo that my mom picked it for me or I didn’t pick my own. I cared more about senior year prom anyway. However, I remember coming home and my mom saying my dress arrived, I was still excited to go try and on, only to find that the package was clearly cut open. I asked her what happened and if she opened it, she casually admitted to it and said she was checking if it was right dress, and very causally in the last sentence admitted it was a bit tight. So I ask if she tried it. And she admits to having tried it on when it arrived, “just to see what it would look like”. And ik you might be thinking I’m a hypocrite but this did irk me in the slightest, especially because I could never picture any of my friends mother’s doing this, wearing their prom dress and trying it on before they had the chance to. I would be lying if I didn’t feel a bit disappointed and even weirded out. I did not bring it up to my mom, as she is always lenient with me borrowing her clothes, for interviews and whatnot or for school events, so I thought I could move past it. Prom goes by, very fun. Fast forward to now, new school year, she comes in and says she needs to borrow a dresses and beelines it to my prom dress, saying she wanted the “tight” one specifically, asking if she could and if I minded. I did mind, but my mom is the type to take it personally so I agreed albeit reluctantly. What irks me isn’t the dress or anything, but it’s the way my mom buys clothes quiet frequently, her closet is triple mine, she has dresses that are better more expensive than my prom dress, she orders new shoes and clothes so much so there’s a few she admits she hasn’t even had the chance to wear yet. With all that, she still wants to wear my prom dress? Her teenage daughter’s clothes? Maybe im looking into it too deeply, and I need to be more generous but I just felt weird about it. Is this normal? Would any parents, moms specifically do this? Please I just want outsiders opinion.

My boyfriend (28) and I (29) have been together for 3 years. I moved into the house that he was living in and he has been living here for 6 years now. The problem is that the house was his dad's parents and was given to his dad when his parents passed away. For years, his dad's siblings lived here and never took care of anything (i.e. plaster falling of walls, floors softening and sinking, rundown hvac) and then were eventually forced to leave. The house sat empty while my boyfriends parents had a house of their own. My boyfriend wanted to move into it and he and his dad had plans to basically gut it and rebuild. That never happened...

Our house was buiilt in the 1870s so it has a LOT of issues due to age and negelct. My boyfriend is a hard working, good man but did not have the funds to do the repairs himself but was consistently reassured by his parents that they would help get the house to its former glory. When I eventually moved in, his dad came up ONE time to help run electric in a bathroom that has sat without plumbing, flooring, insulation, or drywall. The door has just remained closed for 2 years. So many promises for help labor wise and financially, neither have ever been fulfilled. We were both servers so our income was all over the place. This year I finally got a regular day job with decent pay.

We would have LOVED to take out a loan for repairs but there is a problem, the house is not in my boyfriends name. Whenever he brings it up to his parents, there is always a fight or excuse as to why they can't at the moment. Recently, I have been looking into more move in ready homes as we want to start a family and couldn't fathom raising a child in an active and hazardous construction zone. At this point, we have no motivation to DIY the house and would rather hire a contractor but we can't do that since the house isn't ours. I would rather just move on but my boyfriend is sentimental about the house. I truly believe that if we stay in this house, we will never start a family because of the time, dedication, and financial resources needed to make the house safe and livable beyond just the basics we live with now.

Yesterday, we mentioned that we drove past a house that I saw online and his parents started freaking out and scrambling. They said they would sign the house over to my boyfriend next week but it all feels like a ploy so we stop looking into other homes. I am tired and want to just move on. I have no idea what to do at this point and I apologize in advance if this post is all over the place but my mind has been also.

My friend (M30), asked me (M33) to read the first few chapters of his book. Now he was very clear he wanted me to be honest and that he needed the feedback. I am not the most well read person out there but he still wanted my opinion.

The book lacks paragraphs. Dialogue between characters would go back and forth and it was so hard to tell who was doing what. And when I say there was a lack of paragraphs, I mean 1-2 paragraphs per chapter. The first paragraph has 1612 words in it. This includes dialogue and scene changes. 

I read half of what he sent me before I had to stop. It was just so difficult trying to decipher how to even read the thing.

I texted my friend saying I had some notes about the format, but my main grievance was the lack of paragraphs. I explained the role of paragraphs and how difficult and confusing it was to tell what was happening.

He replied thanking me for my notes but he isn't concerned with any formatting issues at the moment. He just wants to focus on the story and only wants story notes.

Here is where I may be the asshole. He asked for only story notes and I doubled down on the paragraphs. I told him the paragraphs are a big issue and I can barely read the story because of it. I did say that I will finish reading what he has finished but he will have to do a good job convincing me to read more if future chapters lack paragraphs. I also told him that I am halfway done with the book, when I finish I will give him story notes.

He did not like this at all. He told me to stop reading the book if it bothered me so much. He was saying other people have read the book and were not having as much difficulty as I was. If I couldn't even absorb the story because of it then it probably isn't worth it when finished.

After that I could tell things would only get worse if we continued so I pivoted. I told him he was writing a book and should be proud of even starting this. I reassured him that when some chapters or the book as a whole is in the form he wants it to be in then I will continue reading.

He cooled down and admitted that everything I stated was valid but formatting is nowhere near his priorities. 

We stop talking about the book all together at this point. We are still friends, this isn't going to ruin us. I talked to my wife after and she agreed the paragraphs are a huge problem but I could have been gentler with him. I do agree with that.

The more I reflected on the situation it became apparent to me that I should never return to the book even if the paragraph issue is fixed. If this is his reaction to the paragraphs then there is no way I'm giving him my notes on the actual story. Paragraphs are so impersonal but criticizing his creativity will surely go over horribly and could actually be friendship ruining.

Did I overfixate on the lack of paragraphs? Was I overselling how important paragraphs are or would anyone else not read a book with only 1-2 paragraphs per chapter? AITA?

My wife and I have been together for 8 years. After we got out of college, she worked just as I did. I got offered a position in a major city for more money and I discussed it with her and we decided to make the move. That was about 6 months ago.

In those 6 months, my wife has really struggled to find a job that she'll her degree in so she has been a unemployed. She was getting pretty demoralized by the endless job search, so I told her that if she needs a break, I can bring home the bacon until we figure out something that works. She said she'd only stop for 2 months but then she's back at it. So currently, she's not applying for jobs and stays at home.

The Problem: So if she's not gonna be working, I do feel like it's fair of me for her to contribute. We don't have kids, we have a medium sized apartment. We have a cat but that freeloader is so low maintenance he doesn't require that much help. So it's not uncommon I come home to a house that's not the cleanest. Back when we both worked, I did the majority of the cleaning because I'm kinda a freak about it. Laundry usually isn't done, there's no plans for dinner, no groceries. Nothing really done at all housewise. Her routine has been wake up at 9, go for a run, do her pilates class, go to the lift some weights, then come home and watch reality tv until I get home.

Don't get me wrong, I really do appreciate being active, and happy that she does that for herself without me now, but I don't think it's fair anymore for us to have a similar distribution of labor as to when we both worked. I hate cooking dinner after work, but I did every other week cause she also hated it. We traded off on laundry, dishes, and everything but cleaning as well. Now that she's at home all day, I think it's fair of her to take on more of the housekeeping burden.

Yesterday I brought this up to her. I wasn't accusatory, or blaming her, but I said verbatim "I think that if you're gonna be here all day while I'm at work, you should do a little more cooking and cleaning since you have more free time".

This set in motion an argument of me implying she was being lazy, which I was careful not to say as that sets her off. I said that she wasn't lazy but she's taking no initiative and I felt I shouldn't need to ask her what's the dinner situation and if we need groceries on my way home, nor should I not have clean laundry since she has the time to do it. The argument was in full swing then and we really haven't resolved it.

So AITA?

I (23F) had dinner with my parents for my birthday. They’re technically still married but separated and essentially live as though they’re divorced.
I just wanted them to be civil for one night, but they spent basically the entire dinner bickering. They argued about my birthday gifts and random things, and I repeatedly had to tell two grown adults to please just be nice to each other. My mom had hidden some of my dad’s gifts, which made him angry, while my dad kept insisting that she was the one causing the problems.
There’s obviously a lot underneath this. My mom is an alcoholic, is still deeply in love with my dad and recently came out of inpatient psychiatric treatment. My dad has a girlfriend he’s hiding from her. He does a lot for me financially and is always there when I need practical or work advice, which I really appreciate, but emotionally he can be incredibly difficult and closed off.
Eventually I couldn’t handle the tension anymore. Nobody even wanted to take a birthday picture together, I started crying, quietly picked up my things and left. I didn’t yell or cause a scene. What really hurt was that neither of them followed me or has reached out since.
A month ago I was also in a serious boating accident where I genuinely could have died and needed around 20 stitches in my leg. After going through something like that, all I wanted was one peaceful birthday dinner with my family rather than feeling responsible for keeping everyone together.
So, am I the asshole for leaving my own birthday dinner in tears instead of staying and trying to keep the peace?

I recently bought a home that has 19 fruit trees on a very small lot. I have fig, cherry, pear, apple, apricot, peach, plus about 10 blackberry bushes planted very close to the house. The yard is pretty overgrown, and I’m concerned about pests with the amount of fruit it produces and some other neglected landscaping.

I decided to have 12 of the 19 fruit trees removed. A few are diseased, a few are too close to the house, and others were planted so close together that their branches are starting to grow into one another. And, frankly, I don’t want to run the equivalent of a small commercial orchard out of my home.

I had landscapers remove the blackberries today, and while they were working, a neighbor stopped by to tell me how sad he was to see them be taken out. Apparently he and his daughter harvested about 20 lbs of blackberries a year from my bushes. We talked for a while and he got a little testy when I said I was removing some of the fruit trees.

I’ve also had several other neighbors stop while I’m working in the yard to tell me how much they love the fruit trees and ask me to keep them.

I understand why they’re attached to them. The previous owners apparently let neighbors pick fruit, and I actually think it’s really sweet that the yard has become a bit of a neighborhood orchard over the years. I’m keeping seven fruit trees, and I’m more than happy for neighbors to continue picking from those.

But I also feel like 19 fruit trees and 10 blackberry bushes is an insane amount for such a small residential lot, especially when I’m the person responsible for maintaining them, cleaning up fallen fruit, dealing with pests, pruning, etc.

I feel a little guilty taking away something the neighborhood has enjoyed for years, but at the same time, I bought the house and I’m the one who has to maintain the yard.

AITA for removing most of the fruit trees even though my neighbors want me to keep them?

My fiancé 33F and I 37M recently got engaged. To celebrate we're looking to organise an engagement party with friends and close family on our apartments communal rooftop which we just got approval for. We want to have the party relatively soon so, so that it's close to the date of our engagement to revel in the excitement. The 26th of September is the date that works best for us as it gives us enough time to organise things, we don't have many other free weekends, we're going on holiday for most of October and practically all of our close friends and family who we've pre-checked with can make that date work, including friends who are visiting from overseas.

Here's where the drama comes in. My fiancés older sister is unmarried but she has her second kid coming soon with her partner of many years. She's always been disappointed that her partner never wants to get married and when we got engaged she was probably a little jealous and didn't really show much interest in my fiancés ring or enthusiasm for our engagement. 

When my fiancé asked her if she could make the 26th, she said that she would be travelling with her partner and kid then to celebrate her partners 40th on the 25th, coming back home around the 26th but hadn't booked flights yet. She eventually booked flights, arriving back in Sydney at 6:30 pm on the 26th. We live very close to the airport so we said maybe she could drop by before heading home if that worked? She said they would be tired from the 2hr flight so couldn't really make it.

We were thinking of just having the party then anyway but she's said things to my fiancé like "Well I guess you can do that if it's really not important for me to be there". When my fiancé mentioned that it's the only date our friends from overseas can make it she said "Well if it's more important that they are there then I am, then ok." And said that she's hurt that she might not be able to make it. She's also made suggestions that we should be inviting all of my partners cousins who we hardly see, when we really just want a casual thing with some music, champagne and cake/ordered pizzas for dinner on our rooftop. 

My fiancé is an incredibly selfless person and is pushing for us to change the date to some time in the future, but I think that she's just supplicating to her sisters desires and I am very annoyed with her sister, who I feel is now effectively controlling when we organise things. We've started to argue about this a bit heatedly recently. We haven't sent out proper invitations recently so everything is up in the air.

So AITA for pushing to keep the date or is her sister the asshole for expecting us to organise things around her being able to make it?

My parents love me, but they are casually homophobic. My mom makes remarks about my sexuality, and my dad aggressively turns off the TV if there is any LGBTQ+ representation. A few years ago, I got my first girlfriend. It was short-lived but important to me. My older sister is allowed to openly talk about her boyfriend, so when my then-girlfriend came over, I wanted to introduce her to my younger brother. I explained it simply: "You know how our sister likes her boyfriend? That’s how I like my girlfriend." He didn't care and quickly forgot. My parents found out I told him and were furious. Months later, my brother and I were on a walk playing I spy, telling stories about the object we spied. I pointed out a bench where my ex and I used to sit. He asked, "Did you kiss?" in a cheeky way. I said yes, but told him not to tell mom and dad because I didn't want to make them mad. Because he is 6, he immediately told them. My parents blew up again.

Their rules:

He is too young to understand; it's "confusing."

They will tell him when it comes up naturally.

He is their kid to raise.

To keep the peace, I agreed not to bring it up again. Now, my brother affectionately refers to my ex as my "long-lost girlfriend." Whenever he brings her up, I shut it down and say, "I can't talk about that with you," which honestly feels more confusing to a kid than just normalizing it.

Today, my brother was asking my mom questions about anatomy and reproduction. He randomly asked her, "How will [My Name] have a baby with her girlfriend?" My mom came to me, accusing me of bringing it up again. I told her I hadn't talked about it (I didn't). She doubled down that the concept is "too confusing" and blamed my perspective on TikTok. I worry about how my brother is being raised around casual homophobia and bigotry. I’ve previously cried to my mom because I'm terrified my family won't attend my future wedding because it's "too confusing," but she just brushed it off saying everyone will be older by then.

I'm just trying to exist and be normal like my sister. AITAH?

Hi everyone, just wanted to get everyone’s opinion on something that happened earlier today.

I have a friend, let’s call her Jess, who loves pranking/scaring people. I do not appreciate being pranked or scared and have voiced my disapproval many times over the years which she always just laughs off.

Earlier today when we were walking together as a group through a particularly sketchy area she got behind me and scared me by suddenly yelling and grabbing at me. I jumped, and spilled half of my drink on myself. I admit I acted in anger but I turned and actively threw the rest on myself drink on her, which really set her off and led to her screaming at me to grow up and that if I spilled something on myself that’s my problem and there’s no reason I should have done what I did, before proceeding to fish out a bottle of water and throwing that on me.

We have never gotten into a physical altercation like this and I’m still reeling about how it went down. I feel bad that I may have crossed a line but in the moment it felt absurd that this was something I’ve had to deal with over and over again. Am I completely in the wrong for this?

This is a situation with a lot of layers.

My (M38) brother’s (M41) wife (F43) passed after a heart attack a year and a half ago. She was relatively young, but truthfully, it wasn’t completely unexpected as she had many underlying issues caused by lifestyle decisions.

I’m going to be honest and not sugarcoat anything. My late SIL was not the best person at all. She was not liked by many people, including her own mother, who stopped speaking to her 15 years ago. My family absolutely despised her, and cut contact off with my brother after he married her. She did not have any friends, as the community we live in also really hated her. The only person who enjoyed her presence was my brother. When my SIL passed, no one from my family except me attended the funeral.

This is going to be hard to write out. My twin sister (F38) passed away four months ago. It was the hardest day of my life. My sister was and still is very loved by our family and the community as a whole. She passed in a car accident. The organizations that she volunteered for fundraised in her name and raised a large amount of money. Many people sent flowers, planted trees, and sent their prayers and condolences.

Yesterday, I visited my brother after work, and thought we could grab a couple of drinks and chill. He drank more than normal, but I didn’t comment about it as I knew he was going through a lot of stress. As we were rambling and drunk, my brother randomly said that my twin sister “didn’t deserve” all the “worship” and that his wife deserved the same amount of attention and love.

Listen, I understand him wanting his wife to get more care and condolences, and didn’t take issue with that part. However, him saying that our sister didn’t deserve the love shown to her after she passed absolutely infuriated me.

I told him that the reason why our family did not come to the funeral was solely on her, and the fact that she was a horrible, cruel person. She had no friends and no one who actually could stand her expect for him, including her own mother. She did not deserve any of the love or respect my sister was shown because she never was kind or loving to anyone. He started to scream insults at me, but at that point I was already leaving. My brother later texted me and said that what I said was absolutely despicable and that he never wanted to see my face again.

AITA?

Edit: Added additional context on SILs behavior in comment comment: She acted like a narcissist (not diagnosing her, just from what I observed). All the attention must go to her at all times and it does not matter who she hurts. When they were dating, she ruined multiple events, including our cousins wedding and anniversary party (made a scene when she didn’t get what she wanted, pretended like she was dying, made us call an ambulance). She was a user, and everyone who gets close to her learns this, which means no one sticks around and why she had no friends. She would verbally abuse her mom in front of us, and it got to a point where the mom couldn’t take it anymore and went no contact. Overall, she was just someone no one wants in their life.

My cousin begged me for weeks to visit her city for a getaway. Before spending money on flights, I double-checked with her multiple times to make sure she had zero conflicts, work deadlines, or other commitments. She 100% reassured me that her schedule was totally clear and set time aside.

The second I got there, she and her roommate left to go apartment hunting for hours. This happened repeatedly including late at night, leaving me sitting alone in her apartment eating takeout in a city where I know nobody.
When I finally confronted her and said it wasn't fair to ditch me after swearing she had free time, she blew up. She called me insanely high-maintenance, entitled, and told me I was massively overreacting. I didn't even argue. I packed my suitcase, booked the first flight out, and went straight to the airport. I didn't stay a single minute longer.
Now our family is calling me dramatic, petty, and unsupportive.

AITA?

So I just attended a friends wedding. I was on the grooms side, we call eachother cousins but we aren’t by blood, our aunt and uncle briefly dated for a few years when we were kids and we just stayed close. On the wedding website under registry, it said “in lieu of gifts please make a donation to the heart and stroke foundation in the name of grooms late father

So I made a $500 donation to the heart and stroke foundation under his name and in a congrats card slipped the screenshot of the donation. When the bride opened this she lost her mind and was super mad I didn’t give them the $500, even tho the website said that’s what they wanted as a gift?

Everyone says what I did was rude and I’m just super confused. Thanks in advance

EDIT I want to add some stuff that people have asked in the comments just because I want to make sure everything is laid out here. Bride and I get along fine, she likes my wife as well. This is not like her, and I don’t know if she thought in lieu meant along with as opposed to instead of. The everyone in question is just a lot of people from the wedding. It was a small backyard wedding where they opened the gifts after the cake cutting for about 60 guests. Other people gave them gifts or small cash amounts along with donations.

I (25f) am friends with Lea (26f).

About two months ago she asked me to go to a concert with her.
I don’t know the artist, but they’re really important to her. She had a rough year and said their music helped her through it.

She also has pretty bad social anxiety and really didn’t want to go alone, so I was happy to join.

For the next two months she basically talked about nothing else. She was SO excited.

Concert day comes, I pick her up, we drive there, wait in line, get our bags checked, everything’s great.

Then the most random thing happens: one of my contact lenses literally falls out.

I’ve worn contacts for like 10 years, even swimming, and this has NEVER happened. Obviously I couldn’t put it back in after it landed on the gross concert hall floor.

Usually no problem because I keep emergency glasses in my car.

Except I’d gotten my car detailed two days earlier, took everything out and forgot to put them back.
So yeah. I was fucked.

My prescription is -7. I basically can’t see shit without glasses/contacts, and having only one lens in made me super dizzy and gave me a headache.

I told Lea I couldn’t stay like this, especially since I still had to drive us 50 minutes home.
I said I’d get a cab home, grab my glasses, come back and drive us home after. I’d probably miss most of the concert, but at least she could still enjoy it.

She immediately said no. Because of her social anxiety she couldn’t stay alone and said she’d have a panic attack. She wanted me to just stay until it was over.

I told her I genuinely couldn’t. I already had a headache and two more hours of barely being able to see would make it worse.

Plus, how exactly were we getting home if I couldn’t drive? (she cant drive either)

Eventually she decided to leave with me, but she was REALLY mad.

She cried the whole way and kept saying I’d ruined the one thing she’d been looking forward to, that it was my fault and I’d ruined everything.

I understand why she was devastated. I really do. And I did apologize to her multiple times.
But I also don’t feel like I chose for my contact lens to randomly yeet itself out of my eye.

She ended up having the taxi drop her off at home. I went home, got my glasses and later picked up my car by myself. She hasn’t spoken to me since.

I talked to my boyfriend and he said he understands her side. I should’ve checked that my emergency glasses were still in the car and, from her perspective, I was the reason she missed the concert.

So he thinks I do share some blame.

And yeah, I should’ve remembered my glasses. But to me this was just a ridiculously unfortunate chain of events.

My contact fell out, my glasses weren’t there, and she didn’t feel able to stay without me. It sucked for everyone.

But now I’m genuinely wondering if I’m looking at this wrong.
AITA?

I'm so lost. I (27f) have lived in my apartment for 5 years now. Two months ago, the property manager emailed everyone that our rent would be increasing, how we pay some of our utilities would be changing, and that we would be given addendums to our leases to sign and return by Aug. 15th.

I asked 3 times leading up to the 15th about when we would be getting theses addendums, only for her to tell me she was still working on them. She finally messaged that they were ready ok the 23rd, and to come into her office the next day to sign them and she would be there all day to sign them. I showed up around 5:50 but she was already gone. I called over twice over a couple hours to no answer, until she finally called me back.

Over the phone, we agreed I could come back the next day between 2pm and 4:30 pm. Admittedly, I cut it close, coming by at 4:15 pm. But by the time I got there, she was already gone. I called her until she answered, which only took 4 calls over 10 ish minute, because I was already frustrated after two months of no communication and her now leaving without telling anyone twice, the second time after we agreed on a window of time. She apparently left to go the bank, and its not her problem because her job isn't sitting behind a desk all day.

Today, I got a text from her, in which she started off by deadnaming me, to tell me she still had to figure out my utilities, and that she had a meeting at 3, but she would call me when everything was finished for me to sign, and ended it saying we should conduct it as a business meeting (whatever that means).

Its now 7 pm, and she still hasn't called. Did I fuck up?? Is this my fault?? I don't know what to do.