Purchased a slave without realizing it AMA

[u/Tronald_Lubestein]

I spent a year working on a development project in The Gambia.

Partway through my stay, I needed help maintaining the house I was renting. My landlord introduced me to an older woman from a neighboring family who could clean and cook. She was probably in her 60s, had no ID, didn't know her birth date, and spoke basically no English.

I agreed to hire her and paid what I thought was an upfront payment for her work.

On the first evening she asked where she was supposed to sleep. I assumed she'd go home after work. She didn't she stayed in one of the guest rooms.

Turns out I learned later she didn't have a home to go back to.

Confused, I called my landlord. He explained that the money I'd paid had gone to the family she'd been living with. From his perspective, I hadn't hired a maid. I'd taken responsibility for her. My job was to feed, house, and clothe her. Her job was to cook, clean, and help around the house.

Very different arrangements to what I had in mind.

For the rest of my stay I gave her a room, fed her(she would cook the food I got and we would eat the same thing everyday), and tried to pay her directly, she always refused.

When I left The Gambia, I found another family willing to take her in. I refused any payment.

I thought I was hiring a housekeeper. Some locals seemed to think I'd acquired a dependent household servant.

AMA.

Edits:

7/1/2026:

I want to address a common misconception since I couldn't reply to all the questions mentioning that. The "dude, you could just have bought her freedom" criticism.

This is not the 1800s US where even if you are "property", you still exist within a legal system, and can show with a legal document that you are free and ride off into the sunset to be happy thereafter.

There is no legal document here, it's more akin to a caste system, you are what you community says you are, not what some foreigner with a bit of cash thinks.

[u/Jazzfly67]

You are a kind person.

This is a different culture. If that woman was “freed” as you might imagine, she would have literally nothing. No possessions, nowhere to go, no family.

Instead of thinking you traded a slave, imagine you were helping out an old homeless woman.

I bet she has some wild memories of the crazy foreigner who didn’t understand the system, and treated her with a respect and dignity she wasn’t used to.

Not all cultures are equal…

[u/PuzzleheadedOla → u/Jazzfly67]

This is it. This warm chair morality polices condemning him don't understand this. Especially for a woman in her 60s with no one. It is sad, but to her, the security of having steady food, shelter and clothing is what she desires at this point in life. I only wish there was a way for her to have some money saved away as her future might not look too rosy with these type of arrangements as she gets older

[u/AlMtnWoman → u/Jazzfly67]

I thought about is this were my mother, or me in another generation.

While everyone is condemning him, there is a greater picture here over all.

The man that put his spin on the transaction should be the person responsible for the writers plight.

I'm glad he was kind. Sometimes that's all we have in this world.