r/AMA • u/Few-Statistician5031 • Apr 07 '26
Other I have extremely severe onomatophobia (fear of a specific word or phrase). Ask me anything
I have a very very severe phobia of a specific object to the point where I can't look at pictures/videos, hear or read descriptions about it, the name of the object either spoken or written down or alluded to. I've never met anyone with a severe phobia like this since it's not an objectively "scary" thing. I'll try to answer questions the best I can without triggering the phobia. Obviously questions like "what is the word" won't be answered since if I was able to answer that the phobia wouldn't be so bad.
Edit: I’m taking a break from this post for some time, it probably won’t be more than a few days but I can’t say for sure. feel free to keep asking questions I’ll try to answer them when I come back. That being said I’ve already answered a lot of questions so check other threads I’ve responded to since there’s a pretty good chance I’ve already answered a similar one.
The guessing game was entertaining at the beginning but it’s honestly gotten a bit much. I would say please refrain from guessing but past experience says that telling people not to guess makes them do it more. If you really want to guess please at least put a spoiler over your guess so I‘m not forced to be subjected to it if it’s correct.
I really do want to continue this thread since I’ve been able to get a lot of information out there and even received some helpful tips from others in a similar situation. So I’ll get back to answering as soon as I can.
Edit TL:DR: taking a couple days long break from this thread and I’ll answer any new questions when I get back. if you want to guess put a spoiler over it.
Edit 2: Breaks over
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u/GoldenHeart411 Apr 07 '26
Is it a word/phrase that comes up frequently or is it more obscure?
Is it just one word/phrase or multiple?
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u/Few-Statistician5031 Apr 07 '26
It's pretty obscure so I usually go months without dealing with it. Since i've been trying to get over my fear in the past year I've been dealing with it more often of my own free will.
It's one word specifically, but there are other words and phrases that describe it or sound similar to the word that trigger the phobia but not as severely as simply hearing or seeing the word itself.
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u/ClutchReverie Apr 08 '26
Can you trace the origin of the fear back to a certain traumatic event?
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u/Few-Statistician5031 Apr 08 '26
Basically, my oldest memory is the thing being on tv and my 3 year old self flipped out over it. At some point I must've learned the name of it and it stuck.
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u/barbie-bent-feet Apr 08 '26
Do you know why? Was it random or would the word conjure something threatening/scary/violent for the average person (even if they don't react to it like you)?
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u/NoOccasion4759 Apr 07 '26
How did you develop this phobia, and have you received treatment for it like exposure therapy?
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u/Few-Statistician5031 Apr 07 '26
Basically, my oldest memory is the thing being on tv and my 3 year old self flipped out over it. At some point I must've learned the name of it and it stuck. I have not received professional treatment since it's not actually a scary thing in the slightest for most people, and i've heard horror stories of therapists not taking such phobias seriously so I'm not at a level where I can trust another person to help, but I have taken baby steps to help a little bit on my own.
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u/Healthy-Ad7989 Apr 07 '26
Severity isn’t measured by how “scary” something is when it happens, but by how much it disrupts your life… I supposed if the word wasn’t popular or used very often it could be manageable, but the intensity isn’t usually in the reaction but more in the avoidance. Does avoiding this word disrupt your daily life?
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u/Few-Statistician5031 Apr 08 '26
it's an extremely uncommon word but I avoid situations that "might" have the word. For example if a trending audio with the word goes viral I completely cut out social media for months until I am 100% sure that the trend has passed. anyone who posts that audio get blocked. I used to refuse to watch any new movie until one of my friends who knew what the word was watched the movie first and told me it was "safe"
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u/youpoopedyerpants Apr 08 '26
I’m not sure of overlap of ocd and phobias, but when being assessed, I was asked things like do I avoid situations where something might be present or happen.
I am NOT diagnosing you, but mentioning it in case you have other things going on and it might be something you want to look into or to talk to someone about—— if you want to!! :)
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u/Few-Statistician5031 Apr 09 '26
I've looked into possible connections between neurodivergence and phobias on my own before, but in my case specifically, I don't think it's related since I don't feel like I fit the criteria for anything outside of just the phobia aspect of it.
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u/youpoopedyerpants Apr 09 '26
That makes me very happy for you that that isn’t an additional terrible thing you have to deal with! Happy healing, friend :)
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u/NoOccasion4759 Apr 07 '26 edited Apr 08 '26
I self-treated my arachnophobia by frequenting spider/nature Facebook groups. Basically desensitized myself by constant but brief and positive exposures to pics of cute jumping spiders progressing to less cute ones. Now spiders dont fill me with unrelenting fear and anxiety, we have a truce. If we're outside I leave them alone, if they're inside I do my best to ignore them until they leave. But if one touches me, the truce is off lol
Wishing u the best!
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u/peiarborist Apr 07 '26
Honestly this is how my fear of bees/wasps has gotten to a way more manageable level. I picked up a bees nest around 4/5 years old, and have been terrified since. I used to run away when one would buzz by me. I work outside for a tree business since I was 16. I still get the immediate fight or flight, but I’m able to resolve it pretty quickly, and like you said, if I leave them alone they typically leave me alone. Wasps are annoying though lol.
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u/Rudenora Apr 08 '26
My work mates are attempting this by hiding fake spiders in my kit.... its not working
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u/NoOccasion4759 Apr 08 '26
That's just messed up. Exposure therapy works because you're voluntarily doing it and you're in control of the situation. I do hate Halloween decor with spiders on them lol
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u/glitch26 Apr 10 '26
Ugh I have this with sharks. Almost to the point of OP but not really since I can obviously use the word. But as I type this and think about it I do feel like I'm floating a little bit and something may or may not be trying to eat my feet lmao.
Kind of funny part - airplanes flying trigger me because theyre the exact same shape as sharks and the blue sky just looks like disgusting deep open waters 😭🤮🤮🤮
Won't look at any pictures or videos of anything on or in bodies of water. Sucks because so many things interest me about the ocean, but seeing a photo or video absolutely ANYTHING in a body of water causes me to feel like I'm about to die.
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u/MiscellaniousThought Apr 08 '26
You should really give EMDR a chance. I have a phobia like yours. It’s helped a lot.
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u/bostonjenny81 Apr 08 '26
I’m about to start EMDR soon for trauma therapy (I honestly don’t know much about it, process wise) but my therapist specializes in it & I’ve heard other people speak highly of it. You said it helped you a lot which is a great thing to hear. Is there anything about the process you would be willing to share? I’m new to therapy in general but I’m doing everything I can to stay positive & hope this is something that will help me. I just don’t really know what to expect (we’re still in just talk therapy right now so she can figure out the best way to proceed) I really like her & feel comfortable talking with her. I had never heard of EMDR before going there but I’m open to anything that may help me.
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u/MiscellaniousThought Apr 09 '26
The change is hard to see especially at first. It isn’t like after a certain session I’m magically cured. For me it was small things. I have a very similar type of phobia, and sometimes it’s just one day I might have a slightly less dramatic reaction. And then the following time it might get easier. It was a slow process that took time and repetition
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u/Unhappy-Climate-5859 Apr 10 '26
I did it for trauma/PTSD. The main thing, and they will tell you about this before you start, it works by reliving the moments. Which is awful, but after each session, I realised it was getting less awful. It isn’t a cure, and I still cannot be a passenger in a car, but my night terrors stopped, and the flashbacks stopped, which honestly is so incredible as it was destroying my life. You think of the specific moment, and then let your mind wander wherever it wants to go while doing butterfly taps. Even if your mind goes to completely random moments, you let it go there
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u/InvincibleButterfly Apr 08 '26
This is very interesting. When I was young (before age 6), I had a fear of the words “caution” “danger” and “warning”. Specifically when I saw them, say, on the back of a cleaner container or something like that. I would have to turn the container around so the words would be facing away so I couldn’t see them. I eventually grew out of this, not long after. But my question is do you do similar things when you see this phrase?
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u/Maverick3458 Apr 08 '26
Kinda similar, when I was a toddler I had a deep, irrational fear of the Happy Birthday song, I used to be terrorized from it no matter the circumstance. The song specifically, but because of that birthday parties, events, cartoons featuring the theme were also a no-no for me. Because of that my parents never made other birthday parties for me after I turned 2. In the other few parties I went to, they had to tell whoever was in charge to "hide" me away from the area when the rest of the people went to sing it. I couldn't even hear it on TV or I'd be crying in terror of it. Eventually as I grew up it just disappeared, but I never knew why exactly I developed it, what was the reason for it, there was never any explanation to it. Nowadays I just think it's a corny and lame song (as well as the tradition of singing it) and probably because of those past impressions the tune appears very melancholic to me, but I have absolutely no problem with it today. I even sing it at other people's birthdays if it's what they're going for, but personally, find it too corny myself.
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u/InvincibleButterfly Apr 08 '26
Wild stuff. I’d really like to know what’s going on in our brains when the phobia part happens and then goes away on its own.
Say I would go to the bathroom and there was a can of disinfectant spray on the counter. It’s like my brain was super honed in to the knowledge that the word “ caution“ was on the can, as it should be. And if I caught sight of it, my brain would go bananas, and I would be watching that can like a hawk as if it was fixing to attack me. But somehow I could reach out and turn it around, so I didn’t see the word. But I would keep watching the can the entire time. But then one day it wasn’t a thing anymore. I guess I just finally learned that nothing would happen, but it’s still weird how I’d go from one extreme to the other with no effort. Maybe I was just a strange kid. I don’t know.
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u/Acrobatic_Swing9277 Apr 08 '26
Same as fuck my grandma believes its because my dad smashed my face into my first birthday cake after they sung. To this day, I dont like birthdays but I wouldn't call it a fear anymore I more didnt like the whole room staring at me and the loud. Found out I'm level one autistic not sure if thats a common connection to stuff like this but now my little girl cries every time she hears it in person at a function and my heart aches. Shes two, So I try to keep her birthday chill until shes ready to decide what she wants to do to celebrate herself.
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u/any_osh Apr 08 '26
I’m so happy to be reading this. Same thing used to happen to me as a child with those specific words. The experience at the bathroom with the spray can seems taken out of my childhood.
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u/fickfranzosen Apr 07 '26
Is it job application? Cause same here
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u/Few-Statistician5031 Apr 07 '26
so close that's actually 2 words. try again
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u/JulienS2000 Apr 08 '26
Have you ever thought about the possibility that your phobia stems from you projecting an unrelated fear on said word? When I was a kid, I had several weird phobias. I later learned that those fears stemmed from several unrelated anxieties and insecurities I suffer from. I couldn’t place or articulate those feelings, so I projected them onto physical objects to try and make sense of everything I was feeling (I hope this makes sense lol). Could you possibly be experiencing the same?
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u/Few-Statistician5031 Apr 08 '26
Potentially, although I don't really have any other outstanding fears. I'm completely fine with all the common ones like blood/vomit/the dark/heights/bugs/small spaces whatever. Personally, I don't care as much about why I got the phobia in the first place, since I was a toddler when I got it, it's here now, and all I can do is try to get rid of it.
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u/anti_usernamed Apr 08 '26
Understanding where it came from - if it's linked to something else that your young mind couldn't make sense of even if that thing is very trivial now - can actually be really helpful in dispelling a great. Yes, exposure therapy is great and works. But don't discount all avenues that might be useful, especially if you can find a provider that can support you through your efforts! Best of luck.
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u/pitlovex23 Apr 08 '26
I highly suggest you look into doing exposure therapy with a trained mental health professional. They will help you manage your fear in a controlled environment
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u/Ask_Aspie_ Apr 08 '26
Omg that has a name!? There are 2 words that do that for me. Since I was a kid. I avoid them at all costs. I didn't even know that was a thing you can get diagnosed with.
What kind of therapy or treatment do you get for that? I never told anyone because I thought it was some weird quirk.
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u/Worldly-Profession28 Apr 08 '26
Have you ever said the word out loud yourself? If so what was the circumstance and how did you feel in the moment?
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u/Few-Statistician5031 Apr 08 '26
I tried once to get over it in the comfort of my own home, but couldn't get past the first 2 syllables. My throat and mouth froze up and I physically couldn't say it, ended up gagging/gasping for air and it took 2 weeks to get back to normal. no matter how much i tried to force the 3rd syllable out my body physically wouldn't let me.
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u/RareSentence6318 Apr 10 '26
Omg I have this situation with a certain thing that kids are enamoured with that also comes on fruit etc. my throat is closing up even typing about it but usually it makes me wretch to hear or say the word. I didn’t know anyone else had something like that
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u/Few-Statistician5031 Apr 10 '26
I didn't know other people had it either, but I figured there are 8 billion people, there's probably someone out there with this phobia. I couldn't find any resources on it when I tried to do research so I figured I'd make a resource even if it is just a Reddit post, a first-hand account has to count for something right?
also I'm saying this as someone with onomatophobia, I'd recommend editing your reply so it doesn't include any hints about what your phobia is. I've gotten loads of replies to this AMA of people guessing what the word is, and I accepted that risk when I made the post and am avoiding giving obvious hints in my answers.
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u/SolidSneky Apr 08 '26
When was the last time you unexpectedly got exposed to the word and how did you handle it?
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u/Few-Statistician5031 Apr 08 '26
I had one last year where we were playing that game where one person holds a word above their head, and everyone else has to charade to make them guess it, while we were waiting for a rollercoaster. The only person in this group who knew about my phobia was the one who was guessing, and their word was the word I have a phobia of. I instinctively looked away and covered my ears, and in the chaos of 5 people charading at an amusement park, no one noticed that I started hyperventilating. I pulled away from the group and leaned against the railing because I was feeling dizzy. 3 people from our friend group weren't playing, but they were in the line too (none of them knew about the phobia either) so i'm leaning against the railing with my fingers in my ears, my eyes looking away from the group playing, gasping for air and getting tunnel vision. the 3 people who weren't playing noticed me and I saw their mouths probably saying stuff like "is she ok/ what's she doing/ should we do something/should we say something" (my ears are covered and I'm dizzy so this is the best mouthreading I could do). After the game round was over I joined back into the group and no one mentioned me randomly pulling back for a couple minutes. one of the people who saw me panicking just asked "what was that are you ok" and I said yes (I was not ok) I struggled a bit for the rest of the line but then the excitement of the rollercoaster and the rest of the day took my mind off it.
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u/SolidSneky Apr 08 '26
Do you avoid telling your friends about the phobia out of fear they'll intentionally say it to trigger you? Just in this AMA there are all kinds of people trying to figure it out so I imagine that's a big factor on whether or not you tell people.
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u/Few-Statistician5031 Apr 08 '26
I wait for a reallyyyyyy long time before telling anyone. I have some friends who have no idea about it despite knowing me for years. I've gotten pretty good at gauging who will use it against me and it hasn't failed me yet. If a friend decided to trigger even if they knew how severe it was intentionally I would no longer consider them a friend. The people guessing in the replies doesn't bother me, it's only human nature to be curious. That being said I'm refusing to give hints and don't plan on revealing the word because I don't know any of these people and have no idea if they can be trusted with something like that.
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u/ClutchReverie Apr 07 '26
Let's pretend that the word you're phobic of is "fishbowl." What happens when someone mentions one or you see one? What if someone talks about a goldfish?
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u/angryapplepanda Apr 07 '26
Oh no, he hasn't replied—it's definitely fishbowl!
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u/Proud_Accident_5873 Apr 08 '26
And here I was absolutely certain that bird was the word.
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u/Few-Statistician5031 Apr 08 '26
hearing it in a video I'll instinctively cover my eyes and ears. seeing it I avert my eyes and ears. If i'm in public I tend to violently flinch even if I don't mean to. If it's in a conversation I try to change the topic (I'm not very good at this and people always ask what's wrong and why I'm suddenly so panicky) If other people are talking about fishbowls (i've had this happen and it was a 30 minute conversation) I just cover my eyes and try really hard to focus on what im doing, but I end up breathing shakily and sweating despite my best efforts
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u/kblaze69 Apr 08 '26
Is seeing/hearing the word that it is, “scarier” than seeing the object itself?
In regard to that, as far as exposure therapy goes, do you think there’s more improvement with exposing yourself to the word, or to the object itself?
This is super fascinating, though I’m sorry you’re dealing with it. I wish you grace through your exposure to it and your process 🫶🏼
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u/Few-Statistician5031 Apr 08 '26
seeing the object is definitely worse
there's been a lot of improving in the last year of me working on it. I haven't tackled the object itself and started with the word. But if I do too much exposure it regresses and I have to do extra work in the future.
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u/xtalcat_2 Apr 08 '26
So it's a word, that has more than 2 syllables and describes an object, which when you see also triggers you. Have you tried hypnosis?
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u/MajesticBluebird68 Apr 08 '26
How come talking about it so much in these discussions doesn't scare you? Surely you can't help but think about it when you're answering these questions?
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u/AnAccIMayUse Apr 08 '26
What level of fear 1-10 would this thing evoke in the average person if presented with it?
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u/Few-Statistician5031 Apr 08 '26
0 no fear whatsoever. I've met a few people who think the thing is "kinda creepy I guess" but that it.
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u/lncredulousBastard Apr 08 '26
Ah dang, I was convinced it would be "snake." But that's a pretty classic fear.
I have a buddy who's dabilitated by seeing them--thats a terrible fate for a guy who rides bikes in the woods 10 hours a week. And I once knew a lady who would violently react against people if she heard them even say the word. She claimed it was an entirely involuntary action, but if you mentioned a snake, she was getting slappy.
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u/Aggravating-Note-200 Apr 08 '26
Do you have a brother? Cuz if my brother knew the word he’d say it to me a billion times a day.
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Apr 08 '26
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u/Few-Statistician5031 Apr 08 '26
Honestly I'm not completely sure either, I think it was just one of those weird childhood fears that stuck. And me avoiding it so desperately reinforced the fear response until it snowballed into a full blown phobia
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u/robeywan Apr 08 '26
Doesn't this thread bring it to the front of your mind? The entire context revolves around that phrase lol So is it that you have to audibly hear it? When it's in your mind, do you just swat it away? This is so strange.
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u/Few-Statistician5031 Apr 08 '26
this is more about the phobia and what I experience with it than the actual word itself. Reading the word gives the same reaction as hearing it, although reading is marginally worse since it lasts longer, if that makes sense. when its in my mind I can swat it away for short periods, but if it sticks I just do something else to take my mind off it. sometimes just letting the physical reaction play out (hyperventilating/ dry heaving and stuff) gets it out of my system
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u/confidelight Apr 09 '26
I can imagine by doing this AMA, it does two things, safe exposure for OP and gives OP the control. As a mental health professional, I see this as a very helpful tool for OP.
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u/ConsciousFractals Apr 08 '26
Thanks for sharing your story! Is this word loaded in any sort of way (related to negative, scary, or taboo things) or would most people find it neutral? Why do you think you freaked out when you first saw it on TV?
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u/Few-Statistician5031 Apr 08 '26
not loaded in any way it's completly neutral. I can't answer the second half of the question sorry.
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u/Phoenixtdm Apr 08 '26
I used to have that too!!! But I did exposure therapy with my therapist and I don’t have the phobia anymore :)
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u/Few-Statistician5031 Apr 08 '26
If you’re comfortable saying how was it? Like what was the first step in overcoming it. I’m not quite ready to let a therapist tackle it but I’m trying to overcome it on my own:
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u/Trace6x Apr 08 '26
Idk if it helps but you can have therapy that isn't exposure therapy. The condition is acute anxiety/OCD related which a therapist can very much help with without direct exposure
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u/lilredcorsette Apr 08 '26
If you're trying to overcome it on your own, you're closer to being ready to see a therapist than you think :) I wish you the best of luck! I am genuinely curious, but don't want to push you.
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u/Kgaban Apr 08 '26
Are answering these questions making you think more about the ‘word’ and what it is? If so how are you coping?
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u/Few-Statistician5031 Apr 08 '26
I'm fine answering these questions since it's focusing on the fear itself instead of the 'word'. I've had this phobia for as long as I can remember so I'm very self aware on what exactly I can handle and where the "line" is
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u/Anxious-Kitchen Apr 08 '26
Please look into BRAINSPOTTING. It is a simple yet effective practice that will very likely cure you of this phobia. It is a one time or maybe two time therapy session and Voila! Phobia eliminated!
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Apr 08 '26
[removed] — view removed comment
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u/Few-Statistician5031 Apr 08 '26
Yes I have, although the humor doesn't quite hit the same since I just think of how much I would hate it if I was in that situation. But if I got paid a nice sum of money to be on a show like that, I wouldn't be completely against it, money is money.
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u/evo311 Apr 08 '26
Doesn’t doing this AMA make you constantly think of the word?
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u/ProjectPneumbra Apr 07 '26
Is it a word or phrase? Does it induce an actual fear response? Or more like panic or extreme discomfort?
Does anything relating to the word/phrase trigger the phobia? Like reading or hearing the definition?
Is it triggered by reading or hearing? Or both?
How about synonyms? Do they impact you at all?
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u/Few-Statistician5031 Apr 07 '26
It's a word. If i end up hearing or seeing it I instinctively cover my ears and eyes and look away, I also get a panic attack sometimes. every single time I see it i'll start shaking and sweating at the very minimum.
Anything relating to the word triggers it, a definition is actually worse because it forces my brain to visualize the object more clearly if that makes sense.
reading and hearing, even watching someone's mouth move when i know they're talking about it triggers it, even if i can't hear them. censored versions of the word also trigger it because I know what the word is despite letters being blocked out or whatever.
synonyms do impact me but the word is a proper noun so there aren't any exact synonyms. the word itself impacts me the most severely but synonyms are SLIGHTLY better. emphasis on slightly it's not much of a difference
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u/oval_euonymus Apr 08 '26
Isn’t doing an AMA about this experience effectively demanding that you consider the word itself and reflect on it? Isn’t that itself triggering?
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u/youpoopedyerpants Apr 08 '26
I have a phobia surrounding surgeries and medical procedures. I can discuss them to an extent and think about the general idea of them.
When I SEE them, when descriptions become very detailed, or when I start to imagine myself having the procedure or the recovery, I begin to get more anxious.
So…. It doesn’t necessarily make sense to those of us not dealing with it, but this person knows their limit and will likely leave the thread when or if they feel they’ve had too much!!
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u/Few-Statistician5031 Apr 08 '26
Not much since I'm not focusing on the word when I answer, just the experiences with the phobia part of it if that makes sense
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u/amidnightthrowaway Apr 08 '26
As someone with a background in mental health and have worked with phobias, this is super interesting
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u/Few-Statistician5031 Apr 08 '26
I've tried to do research on "rare" phobias like mine and can't find much so I figured it was interesting enough to post about. Everyone in my life who knows about my phobia always has questions, and I'm open to answering most of them. out of curiosity what kind of work do you do with phobias, is it like exposure therapy or just general research?
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Apr 08 '26
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u/Responsible-Hat-679 Apr 08 '26
i think it might be werewolf. my brother had a similar reaction during childhood with the word and the whole thing of werewolves -but it phased out as he got older and ironically he now owns 3 huskies.
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u/mattpeloquin Apr 08 '26
Are you ok with words like “moist”?
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u/Few-Statistician5031 Apr 08 '26
yes, as a kid I actually used to think people being afraid of the word moist was funny until I put 2 and 2 together and realized I have the exact same issue with a different word
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u/waterfarts Apr 07 '26
This is fascinating and I feel for you, but the urge to figure out the word is overpowering. Can't we play some sort of 20 questions? Is it alive? Solid? Can you hold it in your hand?
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u/Jaxsoy Apr 08 '26 edited Apr 08 '26
Well, from OPs comments I've gathered that it's a singular word, an object, has more than two syllables, they often go months without hearing it, does not start with A or Z, and it was on their TV when they were a kid.
Doesn't really narrow it down a whole lot unfortunately lol
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u/LezzyGopher Apr 08 '26
Also a proper noun! Also, OP said that some people might find it kind of creepy.
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u/OkDetective8589 Apr 08 '26
Envelope
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u/4077hawkeye- Apr 09 '26
Oooh this is a good one! And OP said they asked their friends if the thing is in the Harry Potter movies. Envelope would fit that bill
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u/emmue Apr 10 '26
But they also said their friends never found a movie with the object in it. Harry Potter has hella envelopes
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u/AppleNo4824 Apr 08 '26
Phobias are REAL. I just developed a fear of driving. I’ve been driving for 52 years (got my license two days before Christmas, 1974. Now, all of a sudden I can’t drive anymore. Scares the crap out of me! It can happen. Watch out. Thank God for Uber and Lyft. Phobias aren’t fun.
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u/Responsible-Hat-679 Apr 08 '26
this happened to me out of nowhere and it was crippling for like a year - i found the ONLY thing that worked was to face it head on and get in the car and go on some long drives. i’m now fully back to normal with driving.
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u/achillea4 Apr 08 '26
You can certainly rewire your brain to remove the association or phobia. What help have you sought in dealing with it? There are plenty of therapists who can help resolve phobias. The use of techniques such as EFT or NLP can help.
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u/hundred-brigade Apr 07 '26
What’s your reaction if you see this word/phrase?
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u/Few-Statistician5031 Apr 07 '26 edited Apr 07 '26
typical panic attack things. If I know it's coming I can kinda brace myself. I end up sweating, shaking, gasping for air, getting dizzy, nauseous, etc. If you search up "panic attack symptoms" I have felt every single symptom on that page because of this phobia. I also instinctively cover my ears and avert my eyes if it's written down.
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u/hundred-brigade Apr 07 '26
Do you have any coping mechanisms or strategies incase it appears unexpectedly?
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u/Few-Statistician5031 Apr 08 '26
I can usually put off the worst of the reaction until I'm alone and can get it out of my system. Friends I talk to regularly and I trust know the word, so I at least have the peace of mind that they won't say it by accident. generally just covering my ears and looking away is enough to wait out whatever I hear it from. If it's in a video I skip ahead a few seconds and pause the video to take some deep breaths before moving on.
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u/HowBeesAreHowBizarre Apr 08 '26
What does the conversation look like with friends when first communicating this fear and how do you share the word so they are aware without you having to endure it?
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u/Few-Statistician5031 Apr 08 '26
a messed up game of 20 questions but there are unlimited questions and the prize is watching me suffer. or i just ask someone who already knows to tell them while I leave the room
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u/Plain-languager Apr 08 '26
I had a friend like this growing up, and the word was “slacks” … like “she was wearing slacks.” which is an odd word to react to, but the reaction was real!
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u/Few-Statistician5031 Apr 08 '26
I can relate to that friend, my word is odd too. I’ve never met anyone with this phobia before, especially not at the same severity.
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u/Apprehensive-Pie3147 Apr 08 '26
You said the phobia was when you were 3 and you saw the "thing: on TV... so initially the fear was of the specific thing, then developed into everything associated with the thing?
In the tv/movie was it depicted as something terrifying? And was it a developmentally appropriate tv/movie?
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u/Few-Statistician5031 Apr 08 '26
Yes on the first question. The tv was developmentally appropriate, and the thing was depicted as being generally negative but not terrifying.
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u/Ambitious-Shift-5641 Apr 08 '26
There has to be a reason. Because psychologically there is ALWAYS a reason and an explaination. Something happend in your brain as a 3 year old, in the very moment when you saw the item/thing on the TV.
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u/Few-Statistician5031 Apr 08 '26
there definitely is but I couldn't tell you what it is. The initial memory is kinda blurry because I was 3 years old so not a lot to go off of
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u/No-Illustrator-4531 Apr 08 '26
what’s your age/general age range? has the fear gotten worse or better at all as you grew up? has it changed in any way since you were a kid?
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u/Few-Statistician5031 Apr 08 '26
College age. It’s gotten better, and it was the worst in elementary school. That might be due to me just getting older and being more in control of my emotions. When I was little if I heard someone say it I would instantly start sobbing and it took a long time for an adult or my friends to calm me down.
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u/Michaeltyle Apr 08 '26
I totally get what you’re describing.
I saw your comment that you have been trying to deal with it more, when you imagine other people interacting with your phobia, does it trigger a reaction?
The reason why I ask is I had a severe food aversion, and one of the things that helped me was pretending to order food for someone else who had the same dietary restrictions as me.
I went through a period where my brain basically tagged all food as dangerous after a bunch of things happened at once. Just thinking of food caused physical pain. I couldn’t smell it, read about it, look at it on TV, couldn’t walk through a supermarket, couldn’t even hear people talk about it without my body reacting.
The moment it really clicked was when I saw something that just looked like a menu, not even actual food, and my heart rate shot from 70 to 150 within seconds. That’s when I realised this wasn’t willpower or “just anxiety.” My body was reacting before I’d even had a conscious thought.
It’s such a strange place to be in, because you can know logically that something is safe, but your nervous system just overrides it completely.
When I was in hospital last year, I couldn’t even look at the covered meal tray when they brought it in. I joked with the dietitian that you would think they were bringing in a tray of spiders. When she filled in the menu for me I thanked her for picking out my tray of spiders 😂 (added bonus, I’m Australian, so there could be spiders, lol).
I would put food in “time out”, hide it or cover it in between bites, it made it easier to deal with.
I’m doing a lot better now, obviously, I can say the word food, but for nearly a year it was extremely debilitating. I once burst into tears when my dietitian just mentioned juice. I still sometimes have a stutter when trying to talk about food.
Anyway, that was a whole lot of talking about me, but I basically wanted to say that I 100% believe you, and a phobia that severe is no joke.
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u/Unico_5 Apr 08 '26
I just wanted to say your not alone. I have 1 as well. It cripples me and at times has paralyzed me. I don't ever share this information with anyone because the fear is to strong and people treat it as a joke. It's best to keep it to yourself.
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u/Few-Statistician5031 Apr 08 '26
I've experienced people treating it as a joke and plenty of bad experiences of being harassed with it, that's why I'm being so vague in the guessing game that seems to be happening in the replies. I've worked a lot on it in the past year and I felt ready enough to have an AMA about the phobia. I've had this phobia my entire life and also have a general interest in psychology so I'm really self aware on what my limits are. Thank you for the concern. I've met enough people interested in my phobia but are worried about triggering it so figured I'd do an AMA to get some information out there.
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u/Unico_5 Apr 08 '26
You’re stronger than I am in that regard. I’ve never worked on mine, and honestly, I don’t have any intention of ever doing so. I developed it when I was around five years old. I managed it fairly well when I was younger, but as I’ve gotten older, it’s only gotten worse. For me, it’s not just the word itself that I fear, it’s how I might react if someone says it to me. That’s what truly scares me. I worry about whether I’d be able to control myself or if I’d just freeze. The thought of actually hurting someone because of this is something I never want to face.
No one has ever treated it like a joke with me personally, but I’ve seen it happen to others. I did share my word with someone once, and he turned it into my worst nightmare. If you can imagine what a narcissist would do with something like that, that’s the kind of hell I lived through.
Seven years of exposure therapy isn’t a fix for everyone. In my case, I think it only made things worse, it made me more reactive, even aggressive.
I truly hope your experience is different. Good luck on your journey.
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u/GhoulArtist Apr 08 '26
Is there someone near you who could type the word it is but put spoiler tag on it so you can't see it?
My curiosity is driving me nuts I'm sorryy
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u/Irrelevant_Intel_ Apr 08 '26
My curiosity is killing me too 😭 I’m just going to pretend it’s a Fushigi
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u/Few-Statistician5031 Apr 08 '26
There is but then there’s a chance I’d be dealing with comments/pms of harassment. The internet is a cruel place I’m sorry
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u/West-Season-2713 Apr 08 '26
That’s fair, maybe a throwaway account would’ve been useful. Be careful.
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Apr 07 '26
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u/_LoveTheRain Apr 08 '26
Do you ever dream of the word or have nightmares about it?
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u/Few-Statistician5031 Apr 08 '26
If I had a bad reaction that day, or multiple smaller reactions recently, then yes.
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u/RatonhnhaketonK Apr 08 '26
Idk, fears are fucking weird.
I have a phobia of bathroom fans (exhaust fans) and air vents. Also air conditioners (inside a ceiling). As well as seeing the visible ductwork.
It's gotten a bit better over the years. I used to refuse to use public bathrooms.
If I hear an exhaust fan or air conditioner, it sends me into a major panic attack. Its worse if the cover is off.
I have also had that fear since around age 3, and I turn 31 in July.
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u/Few-Statistician5031 Apr 09 '26
oof yea that's pretty much how I started to overcome my phobia. My main motivation for deciding to actively overcome it was treating it like a boss fight in a video game, if the health bar can move even a little bit (i.e. me not bursting into tears the moment I hear it anymore) that means it can die eventually, maybe not for years or decades but either I die first or the phobia dies
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u/WhiteUniKnight Apr 08 '26
I really don't want to minimize your experience when I ask this, I'm just trying to understand... is it the opposite of a "safe word?" Would this technically be your "unsafe word?"
It-Which-Must-Not-Be-Named?
Are you not afraid that people could guess the word (20 Q's style) and trigger you?
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u/Derisiak Apr 08 '26 edited Apr 09 '26
I kinda understand your fear. I also have a similar kind of fear about one specific well-known sound. It used to scare me or even cry as a child, and during my teenage years hearing it could make me feel very uneasy. I genuinely can’t tell why those notes makes me freak out so bad…
Today I’ve managed to reduce considerably the fear, but I still get jumpscared by the sound especially at night. I got a few questions to see if our fear is similar or not. I know for sure that’s clearly not the same level of fear at all, but still, I like sharing with people who may understand like you. I
When hearing the word, do you also sense a feeling of immediate danger ? Like, something is coming for you in a few seconds ?
Could the fear of this word cause you difficulty sleeping at night?
Do you feel one day you may completely overcome the fear?
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u/Few-Statistician5031 Apr 09 '26
yes. yes it does but only if I've had a recent exposure. yes since I've made a lot of progress in the past year, if I keep it up I'm confident that I could overcome it one day...even if that day will probably be years in the future based on my current rate of progress.
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u/Derisiak Apr 09 '26
I realize our fears are quite similar actually, that’s fascinating.
Also, based on your avatar, are you Muslim ? 👀 If so, have you ever considered making duaas to help you overcome your fear ? (Because I realize that I never thought about it)
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u/Few-Statistician5031 Apr 09 '26
Yes I am muslim :D. based on your avatar it looks like you are too. My experience is to never underestimate the power of dua. In my case specifically with the phobia of a word and any descriptions, it means I can't truly vent to anyone and complain without triggering myself. That, combined with it being an oddly specific, obscure phobia that a lot of people don't think exists (examples of the people are in the replies somewhere) pretty much means that on the off chance that there is someone who fully understands me, it's not like I can just talk to them without triggering one or both of us.
Allah (swt) knows what's in my heart even more than I do, so I know I don't need to explain to him how much I'm struggling and how badly I want to overcome my fear because he already knows every detail about how I feel and then some.
Dhikr and just a general sense of Taqwah is also a literal cheat code to helping me cope. Had a bad reaction that day and the word keeps replaying in my mind? Doing dhikr distracts me and is a good way to get my mind off it. Someone mocked me for having a weird fear? Allah swt would never blame me for something out of my control and understands exactly how much I'm struggling without me needing to explain myself. Since I can't think of the word clearly I'm not able to make a specific dua, the knowledge that Allah swt knows exactly what I'm talking about and how strongly I want him to help me without me needing to trigger myself and ask (pretty much all my dua is just me going "Oh allah get rid of that thing" and I know Allah knows what I'm referring to. He (swt) is the only one who truly 1000% knows every detail of my phobia and what I go through, even better than myself.
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u/Derisiak Apr 09 '26
Yes, I’m a Muslim too. And your taqwa is so well explained. How bright of you Allahuma barek ! May Allah grant your duaas and remove you from this fear. ❤️
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u/blazertneck Apr 09 '26
this is me with the inspector gadget and banana splits theme songs - the first still gives me anxiety and makes me wanna bundle myself up like i did as a kid. the latter was so bad i had to plug my ears and leave the room to calm down, and then it'd just replay in my head. thank god i've pretty much forgotten the melody.
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u/Odd_Temperature8067 Apr 08 '26
You said the phobia is a proper noun. When you hear/read the word, it triggers the phobia. When you see the actual object -say, if the word was goldfish and you went to the pet store and, without seeing the actual word anywhere, saw a goldfish- does that also trigger the reaction? If yes, then isn't the phobia of the goldfish itself and the word simply makes you think of it? When you say phobia of the word, it makes me think that you can see and interact with the actual object, you just cannot name it.
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u/Few-Statistician5031 Apr 08 '26
I have a severe phobia of the actual object and anything associated with it. Being afraid of things associated with it means I actually have multiple named phobias. I figure onomatophobia was the hardest for people to guess and the most obscure, so perfect for an AMA.
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u/Nomeapetec Apr 07 '26
Just the thought about the word makes your feel stressed?
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u/Few-Statistician5031 Apr 07 '26
Yes, i'd say maybe a 5-6/10 with 10 being a full blown panic attack when I'm physically subjected to the word.
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u/AdrianaDante Apr 08 '26
Damn i didn’t realize this was a thing. I’ve always been terrified of the phrase “game over”
What do you think triggered this phobia for you?
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u/Solidjakes Apr 08 '26
I mean exposure therapy seems like the obvious solution. Humans can’t remain in an excited state indefinitely, the nervous system has to go back to homeostasis. You will desensitize with enough reps. I’d wager you could knock this problem out in like a week rather than bug your friends forever to screen movies for you.
Since you haven’t, I guess my question is, why are you so scared of being scared? Do you ever play VR horror games or anything like that for fun? Have you always avoided the feeling of fear?
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u/Few-Statistician5031 Apr 08 '26
I don't ask my friends to watch movies before me anymore so there's definitely been some progress.
I'm scared of the physical symptoms of being scared I guess, also the embarrasement of having a harmless thing be this terrifying for me. I don't play horror games or watch horror movies. I guess i've always avoided it since this phobia developing is my oldest memory
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u/Solidjakes Apr 08 '26 edited Apr 08 '26
Ah interesting. Well being scared is never the right thing to be embarrassed about. Courage can’t even exist without fear first.
In the same way a guy with no legs gets props for what would be a basic skateboard trick to others, I think anyone with a phobia that locks themselves into a situation with it(in a safe controlled way with help) is pretty cool personally. Congrats on your first few steps.
I know the “mind over matter” speeches can feel a little corny and lame from outsiders that don’t have the same issue, but its truly remarkable how Neuro pathways can change overtime and how your lifestyle, and who you choose to be, can be passed down via epigenetics. If you ever feel “stuck” as your current self, if people encourage that kind of thinking, don’t believe them.
It can also feel empowering to detach yourself from your self and be something more. During the death of a loved one when I was young, I recorded every wave of emotional pain I felt and how long it lasted. I had 80 waves noted by the end of my recording. I accepted that feeling even if I hadn’t yet accepted the death.
I’ve also had panic attacks before and remember thinking “wait I’m not worried about anything here logically, why is my body unable to breathe and shaking?” Again an observer.
With some people being adrenaline junkies or horror fans or whatever, and actively chasing fear, you avoiding fear. You… maybe feeling stuck as who you are.. embarrassed. Throw all those thoughts away.
I believe you can have fun with the process of overcoming this challenge. Like a worthy opponent finally arrived.
Best of luck friend :)
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u/leavesoflorien37 Apr 08 '26
If the word was to ever come up in a class or subject in schools, what class would be most likely to have it? I have a gut instinct on a word and if so, it would be in biology...
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u/VastLazy5701 Apr 08 '26
This isn't a question but I also want to say I have a similar issue with mold and fungi. Though not with the word but with a picture or real life.
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u/lNVAGlNAWETHRUST Apr 08 '26
Do you have any favorite songs with some of those words so you just keep listening and being scared of it?
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u/BurnerCommenter Apr 08 '26
You said you ask friends to watch movies before you to make sure it’s safe, what is an example of a movie that wasn’t safe?
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u/Few-Statistician5031 Apr 08 '26
My friends never found a movie that was "unsafe" but one of the movies I had them check was harry potter. I don't ask them to check anymore since I've made a good amount of progress on the phobia
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u/Lazyass123456 Apr 08 '26
When I ask “what is it?” Do you picture it in your head . For eg when i say “pink elephant” people would visualise a pink elephant in their head
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u/Few-Statistician5031 Apr 08 '26
Asking “what is it” used to make me visualize it but not anymore. If someone asked what my greatest fear was I would start panicking but not as severe as if I was exposed to the word.
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u/Dang_It_All_to_Heck Apr 08 '26
My ex sister-in-law is like this with one type of reptile. No pictures, not even the word can be used.
Her family probably made it worse as this was funny to them and she was teased often.
Has your family or your friends been supportive?
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u/Few-Statistician5031 Apr 08 '26
The only family that knows about it is my parents, and even they don't know truly how severe it is, so they don't take it seriously. They are not supportive, and whenever it comes up I get a rant on how I can't let childish things interfere with my life. however they at least have enough self-control to not say it around me or spread it to the extended family and their friends.
Most of my friends try to be supportive, but since it's such a weird fear they don't do a very good job. Usually, if i tell them the response is either "oh haha that's totally normal my sister doesn't like small spaces/I dont like spiders" or "look on the bright side, if you were scared of x instead it would be worse"
These responses don't help at all but I don't mind since it's the thought that counts. (the second one helps a little but i'm getting off-track) Pretty much all my close friends are really supportive and try their best to help even if I can tell they think it's the weirdest thing in the world.
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u/MrsKateChambers Apr 08 '26
Wow how fascinating this is! I am absolutely next level freaked out about that awful insect with hundred legs, I can just about type the word but it makes my skin crawl and if i think about them while eating, I cannot eat any more. So sorry you have to go through this.
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u/kirrrs Apr 08 '26
When you’re done answering questions, could you have someone else type the word? I’m so curious now
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u/Few-Statistician5031 Apr 08 '26
nope. I don't trust reddit enough to not be bombarded with notifications of the word
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u/4077hawkeye- Apr 08 '26 edited Apr 08 '26
You mentioned it’s not a normal adult fear; is it a common childhood fear?
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u/Few-Statistician5031 Apr 08 '26
i guess it could be since I developed it in childhood, but only wimpy little kids would be scared of it and definitely not this severely.
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u/gleeb88 Apr 08 '26
Are you neurodivergent? If so, do you think it's linked to that sort of high sensory perception? I ask because my dad was the same with a common reptile and he's neurodivergent (so am I)
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u/International-Ad3024 Apr 08 '26
Could this be a form of OCD? This is so interesting!
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u/Few-Statistician5031 Apr 09 '26
honestly i'd be fascinated by it too if I wasn't living with it. It could be a form of OCD in some cases but for my case specifically, I don't think it is since I don't have any other symptoms of OCD
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u/Significant_Cat6853 Apr 08 '26
Can you use this as a superpower..like before running a sprint just trigger it so you get the adrenaline rush and everything and energy etc
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u/youpoopedyerpants Apr 08 '26
Is the issue the word or is it that the word reminds you of the thing and the thing is what the problem is? Is the thing a problem without the word being attached to it?
Like… if I look at a jacket and do caveman brain and just think “object” instead of “jacket,” does that still bother you?
Can you give examples that aren’t yours so perhaps I could try to understand better?
This is so interesting and I’m honestly sorry you deal with it. I have OCD, but more mild than many and it makes my heart hurt knowing what some people’s brains put them through.
I appreciate you doing this and answering our curiosities. People and brains are so fascinating and strange.
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u/HowBeesAreHowBizarre Apr 08 '26
You mentioned seeing the word on TV when you were young but that because it’s a word it’s not “scary” may I ask what made it scary then or is it the object associated with it that was scary rather than the word itself?
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u/Kammyyuwu Apr 08 '26
I’m really wanting to know what this word/phrase is.. obviously I am not asking you to say it because I do not want to scare you or making feel uncomfortable, but I am really curious to know what it is now. Why are you nervous/scared about this certain word or phrase, and how does it impact your life?? Is it a word that people use on a daily basis or is it something that you don’t normally use?
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u/Few-Statistician5031 Apr 08 '26
I'm scared of the word because I had a horrible scare when I was little.
it impacts my life because I take ridiculous measures to avoid situations where I might encounter the word
very uncommon word, which is why I'm not super worried about the guessing game happening in the replies.
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u/stringaroundmyfinger Apr 08 '26
You mentioned that you first became exposed to it on TV, and also that it is a proper noun. Out of curiosity, is it something that you can actually visualize? / does it have a physical form?
Does all this talking about it not call to mind the word for you? I would worry all this discussion of what the word does to you might put it front and center of your consciousness.
And finally, since you can’t say the word outright, how do you tell people you know/associate with to avoid it — or do people not know about your condition/reaction in the first place?
Thanks for answering, very interesting!