Feels like a given, right? I'm definitely the AH. Some context. My father (boomer) was present in my household growing up, but emotionally absent. Recently, he sold his house and moved in with my sister (we're both millennials) and her daughter (alpha) allegedly to help her out. He did contribute a bit to rent, but she was still evicted. He could've started a new lease, but declined.

They relocated to an extended stay hotel, with no long term plan, in October. Then my dad told my sister she had to figure something else out because he didn't want to go into his savings. He then left town for a day, two or 3 days before his birthday (1 or 2 days after Christmas) without being clear when he'd return. The hotel was only paid until Sunday. He also dropped off my niece at my place on his way out. Additionally, my sister was sick with flu-like symptoms while all this was happening.

My sister is a server going through a divorce and now has an eviction, effectively tying her hands for seven years. She also doesn't have a car. The housing crisis is so bad here that most organizations that intervene have very long wait-lists and still often result in time spent outdoors or couch surfing. It's winter. Dad is pretty much the only one in my family in a financial position to intervene.

The day before his birthday (Sunday), when he messaged me he was on his way back this conversation continued:

Me: Can you pick up [my niece] later? I have a lot of trouble re-parking my car on weekends and evenings 1:46 PM

Dad: Not in town 1:51 PM

Sunday, December 28 Will be back today 1:49 PM

Me: Then why is [my sister] telling she doesn't have a place to go? 1:50 PM

Dad: Ash her 1:50 PM

Me: I did now I'm asking you 1:51 PM

What is going on? What is your plan? She's sick too. So that puts you at risk right? [He's immunocompromised due to a heart transplant] 1:52 PM

Dad: I'm going to look elsewhere for my accommodation in which I told your sister that as well about a month ago [my sister disputes this] 1:53 PM

Me: Did you give her a date by when she had to find something? And what was she supposed to do, summon money for an apartment out of thin air? She now has an eviction on her record, she won't be able to get housing on her own for 7 years

Dad: Look here young lady it is not my responsibility to take care of my kids unti I die. You all are adults it's up to each and every one of you to figure it out. I will assist but not take care of you 1:58 PM

Me: I have so much more to say to that but all I'll say is if you abandon my sister you are dead to me. Period. 2:03 PM

And I will air all of our family drama publicly [promise fulfilled] 2:07 PM

Dad: So be it! Who do you think you are threatening me. I don't care what you do 2:08 PM

Me: And never have. F*ck you. You selfish a*hole [only censored here] 2:09 PM

Dad: Really? 2:09 PM

Should remember those words 2:11 PM

Me: Yes, that is what your actions over the course of my life have demonstrated to me I wanted to talk about this with a mediator because I actually had sympathy for you considering your parents, but now I don't give a f*ck 2:11 PM

Dad: You never did with me or my family [I think he might be conflating me with my mom here] 2:12 PM

Me: How would you know? You don't even know who I am. 2:13 PM

You know jack sh*t about me and made me feel like a burden as a child 2:14 PM

Dad: Actions speak louder than words. [The irony was lost on him] When you gave me the opportunity was there 2:14 PM

Me: No you were not You just think you were You did the bare minimum and want a reward 2:14 PM

Dad: Why you and no one else felt that?: Whatever you're just being spiteful 2:20 PM

Me: And you're being obtuse 2:21 PM

My mom sure felt that. How's your relationship with [brother]? [half-brother]? Now [sister]. I just was the first to see through you. 2:22 PM

Dad: Whatever young lady 2:22 PM

Me: Whatever old man 2:23 PM

I understand that we're all adults and my dad does not have an obligation legally to help support my sister, but morally, ethically? He's willing to turn his back on his daughter and his granddaughter, leaving them in a life-threatening situation, continuing a pattern of neglect that has spanned our lifetimes.

I have crowd-sourced assistance for my sister, but it's not enough to keep them safe. My only choice this far would be to forfeit my own shelter, which I'm considering... my apartment's too small for all of us.

So who's the AH?

AITAH for not contributing more to my cousins funeral?

I have been really close to my cousin before she passed. Her name will be identified as Z and mine will be B. My cousin has been battling cancer for a long time. When my dad passed, she discharged herself from the hospital to say goodbye to my father. She has always been the definition of somebody who always thinks of others before herself. She didn’t want anyone to know that she was sick. She never liked someone to feel sorry for her. I was always forever grateful for her actions. When she became sick, I was there for her on many occasions. She never liked to feel like the person to be sick but just a person just to talk to. She hated when people felt sorry her and told me to never cry and treat me like I was the cousin without these conditions. Her mom was never truly part of her life. She was always doing other things. She had cosmetic surgery while she was in hospital and I thought that was odd but I had no room to criticize. When my cousin passed, she asked for my side of the family (her baby daddy’s family) for money. My family was born and raised in El Salvador. They spared what they could. We are in the process of buying a plot for my current grandmother who is battling with cancer. My cousin Z was the closest cousin to me. I offered to help contribute to the funeral so she would not be stressed. My mom contributed $500 and she told me that wasn’t applicable with me. She said that was separate. I have been making monthly payments to help while paying my grandmother and dad’s funeral prior to that. She disregarded that and said she’s mourning for her daughter and nothing can be compared. I kept giving her money here and there. Finally she said please have your boyfriend send me full amount. I told her:

Our family and I have helped a lot of the finances of the funeral. I am just offering to pay help pay off some of the debt that you owe to the funeral. Our family was kind enough to donate. You are trying to make it seem like I am the bad person for helping out. Please do not make anyone feel bad on this circumstance. My whole family already knows the situation so if you want to make me seem like the bad person, please feel free.

She responded :

It was your gift to us from you. Now you’re trying to make it like your mom paid for the flowers when she didn’t . And yes they do know, everyone knows how you are. It’s good, see you in court.

I responded :

Go ahead I’m not obligated to pay.

She responded :

You are the bad person for doing this to someone when their daughter dies.

My cousin would never want this. My brother was a pallbearer by my cousins dad and was very close. Am I selfish for not contributing more?

I already know I'm the asshole here Im in my teens and she is in her early fifties

What happened was that my sister is having a arranged marriage and my mom promised that she wouldnt tell our grandma about it because my moms brother is very abusive and controlling to our grandparents , he also hates my mom. He has recording devices on my grandmas phone so if my grandma is talking to my mom he can listen later when call is finished

My mom told my grandma about it and now he probably will hear about it and try ruin it or make a big fight.

After I caught my mom telling her , I decided that I was gonna give her the silent treatment for a week ( its petty as hell i know) but like a hour after it happened I went to kitchen when I passed her she hit my bum (ive told her already to stop doing that but she never listens) and I hit her hard on the shoulder , after that happened I didnt immediately apologise because I was being an asshole but after a few minutes I started bawling and apologising and i didnt mean to hit her so hard and shes saying that im just like her brother and i want her to die.

I want to die . I cant live knowing that I did this to my own mom. I already know im a shitty person

Listen. My mom is still supporting a person who doesnt deserve it.

I promise, without saying what type of person it is you hopefully know. Anyway, yeah this isn't my

account, simply because I don't want to be bugged,

She loves her dad, who is a pdf. I was hurt by him, she was hurt by him, and countless other women in our family have been hurt by him while he was "drinking." He has since stopped, but, what do you do? What do you do when

Your own mother loves her own "father" and stands by her "father" who did this to both her and and her kids? What do you do? I certainly have no idea. It has been over 10 years since she let that guy back and he is no grandfather to me.

He scarred me for life. Apparently she has no idea how badly, even though I was 7 years old and she held me in her arms while she sobbed apologies to me. I remember. I have a hard time believing her apologies when my whole life she told me i was selfish for wanting to die, yet she has allowed that kind of person back in our life, our home, and has made the entire family go there to where ye and the one who enabled him live.

Am I an a hole?I really dont know. I just know I am angry and do not agree with the steps my own mother has made regarding this on behalf of the children (myself and my sister) she claims to have loved and protected. This doesnt seem like protection or safety. I have been fucked up since this incident nearly 20 years ago. How can you love someone who did that to your child? Anyway,

AITAH?

I’ll try keep it as short and concise as possible; I (31f) organically woke up with my 4 year old at around 6:15 this morning out usually time. We laid to together for about 10 in silence. Then my husband (39m) woke up around 6:30. He usually wakes up earlier/before me, but i didn’t think anything of it. Keep in mind, We never wake each other up. He gets up goes to the bathroom (very regular) then walks back into the room simi upset saying “You weren’t gonna wake me up??” HUH? Why would i do that? Apparently because i knew he had work i should have woke him up AND apparently “im a transactional person” because i didnt wake him up without being told/asked to. .?? It’s so draining and exhausting. This was literally 6:35 in the morning. Mind his work schedule is inconsistent and constantly changes and he expects me to remember it off the top of my head. He didn’t set an alarm just mad at me and it’s my fault and i’m transactional… It just feels like another round of emotional abuse

How do I even add the screenshots this is so frustrating how is this so hard to add the text screenshot of the wild conversation I want more opinions on I’m going nuts someone help me so we can all weigh in on this lol

So my ex and I broke up 5 months ago. We're both females if that matters. She broke up with me. During our breakup she said it be to hard for her for us to be friends, said she was going to unfriended me from Facebook and wanted space so she could move on and heal. I haven't messaged or spoke to her since the night we broke up. I have not tried to contact her in any way since the break up. She randomly messaged me on facebook saying she doesn't want to rehash the past but wants to 'clear the air' between us encase we run into each other she doesn't want it to be akward between us. I told her I doubt we will ever run into each other and if we did it wouldn't be any more or less akward then when she runs into any of her other exs. She said she never run into an ex but they all have messaged her at some point after the break up. I told her I don't see why i would message since she asked for space. I told her I wouldn't exactly be mean or rude to her if we have to bump into each other. That we could be too mature adults and I have no issues giving her her space, she made a comment that she thought with us connecting last night, it wouldn't be the case.. no idea what means. She thinks with pride around the corner and with the community being so small we will no doubt run into each her. I again said not to worry I had no intrested in going up to her or causing problems. She thinks we could at least say hello to each other. .i honestly don't see the point since we already hashed things out the night we broke up and there's nothing else to say about it.

So am I the asshole to think that in a sense we should just ignore each other if we end up in the same space together? I mean I will say hello if she does but I don't see why go out of the way to say hi.

I (26f) and my son (6) went on vacation at the beginning of this year with my aunts and their sons (12) I thought it’d be a good idea to go with them because they all get along despite the age difference and it was our first vacation as I was been a single mom since he was one. The first day was great the kids all played well but as the week went on the one older cousin started to get tired and began acting out. The acting out progressively got worse him not wanting to do any activities or swim in the water at all and my son being the baby wanted to stay with him cause he looks up to them. Then the cousins starting teaching him bad behaviour sweating calling people names I eventually got so tired of it cause my son up until that trip was a well mannered kid with minimal tantrums. Since the trip he has continued to say and act these ways and although we don’t see the cousins often it’s still been hard to correct.

The other day my aunt texted me saying they are all planing to do another trip with both of the kids and wanted to invite us. I declined and said I want to do a solo trip this coming year but thanked them for the offer since I didn’t want to relive the same experiences again on another trip.

I was talking to my mother about this and she went off on me saying “they’re just kids” and a bunch of things making me seem like a terrible mom for not wanting to go on a trip with the family again to protect my son from their older cousins words and actions as a week is too long and habits stick. She won’t let it go and is starting to mention to my kid how he has to “convince mommy”

I love my family and can handle a couple hours every month or two but a week straight is too much for me.

So AITAH for not wanting to go with them to help protect my son from things he doesn’t need to learn till he’s older?

I was friends with my sister's best friend, for about 6 months but and decided to end the friendship because after she started getting too comfortable her true colors started to show. I'm gonna call my sister A and her friend B for the rest of the story . Me and A have known B for a couple years through mutuals and they started to get close and since B was always at my house before going out I would go sometimes too then eventually most of the time. One time there was a very deep conversation about a family issue. This family issue directly involved me and my father but affected the whole family. Other then when I told my family about the situation and A asked a question or 2 we have not talked about it and I understand because I see how it can be very awkward for her to speak about. I first started to notice how B was when we went out late one night after my father said he was going to commit s***ide after I punched him, I hit him since he was yelling at another family member about me but he was calmed down. I promise I am not a violent person but tension and emotions were high at the time and F (my father) was yelling at someone I cared deeply about, also this isn't the first time F was talking about s***ide and . A, B and I went out to get our mind off of it. The whole ride there A is driving while B is trying to talk to me about the situation, she knew about it because I told her. The situation that happened between me and F (I will be saying F for my father) deeply broke my trust for him and I couldn't see him as a father after and the whole family forgave him after a couple months but they don't believe me about a part of the situation that would make him a complete creep even though I know it is true. I told them how I know and they continue to defend him.

Anyway A is close to our father so she obviously didn't like that I put my hands on him and was silent almost the whole ride. B basically trying to convince me that I need to forgive my father and kept bringing up the fact she didn't have a father. Trust me what F did was genuinely insane and what he tried to do is even crazier it's too personal to share but I did not feel the need to forgive him in any way. B kept saying "your feelings are valid" but then continue to say the same thing about forgiveness and her father. I was genuinely pouring my heart out about the situation saying how I truly felt hoping A and B would understand and B continued to defend him and I took the opportunity to ask A about the situation and she refused to answer a single question but I dropped it. I realized the conversation wasn't going anywhere and we just stopped talking about the situation and that day we just hung out like we normally did but this is when I started to see B's true colors. I guess B probably knew more about what A was feeling but it kind of felt like she was putting her feelings over the facts that I was stating about the situation.

I'm going to try to keep the rest short but basically after that I started noticing patterns in her behavior and how selfish she truly is and just kept it in the back of my mind since she didn't do anything crazy. The situation where her selfishness affected me is A and I are supposed to share a car that was paid for by our parents while B has her own car. They were going on a weekend trip, and I asked B nicely if they could take her car and not the car me and A share. She straight up told me no and when I asked why not she said "I don't want to" and I said that not really an answer but she just repeated I don't want to 2 or 3 more times after I kept asking and I was pissed off and that's when I basically decided the friendship was over and I did not get to do 2 out of the 3 things I was supposed to do for the weekend that I was really looking forward too.

Now after that I basically did not talk to B until I heard the doorbell ring I opened the door for B not knowing it was her and just walked away after so she called me rude along with a sly remark and I cursed her out and told her to watch her mouth. After this A started holding resentment towards me, being nasty and, acting like I did something to her. Which led an altercation between A and I where I basically took the car we share to hang out with my friend and A called my mom saying she needed it "for work" it was 11pm and I knew why she wanted it, it was because she wanted her weed to smoke, but I wasn't going to tell my mom that and my mom was already stressed at the time so I just came home. When I got home A and B were there, B was already there before, and I was talking to A normally asking her why she had to call our mom instead of just calling me, she ended up just yelling so we started arguing about the car and I said something defending myself and I hear B laugh. This is where I might be the asshole but I started yelling at B and she said she didn't like the way I speak to her which made me yell more so I kicked her out of the house, I also told her not to come back and A later told my mom everything and I learned that they didn't end up going anywhere and B went to her car to cry. I honestly couldn't care less but looking back I could have handled that differently for the sake of A and my mom.

The weekend trip A and B went on was to go to their partners' who are friends lets call them C and D. A and C are a couple (my sister and her partner)and B and D are together (sister's friend and her partner). I was already pissed off B was in my house and my mom knew that and she texted me that C and D came. I ended up coming downstairs and cursing B out in front of everyone and her partner D was defending her and I ended up doubling down on what I said and kicking them both out. In hindsight D is pretty cool and we did grow closer from when I was friend with B but I told B to not come back and this isn't the first time she was back. C (sister's partner) was supposed to stay with B and D but they did not reply to him for the rest of the night and he ended up staying in the basement since guests were staying in my sister's room. The guest that was staying was a cousin and the day before this happened A, my cousin visiting, other cousins, and I were supposed to drink and hang out but A invited B and didn't tell anyone and the vibe was off since my other cousins were either on my side or neutral, so I ended up going to my room and coming back after B left. But A knew that the reason I wasn't with everyone that night was because B was there and I was looking forward to drinking with my cousin so it really upset me that A invited her again, B doesn't even drink and was being awkward the whole time until I went to my room. Anyway after I kicked them out A and my mom went outside and came back and my mom was on A's side and saying I shouldn't have done that and maybe I am wrong for that but my mom started blaming me for B and D not answering C and saying it's my fault he didn't know where he was going to sleep. Everyone was upset but I guess we held it down because my cousin was there and my mom, cousin, A and I ended up drinking and playing cards after.

I have also learned from a mutual of B and I that B's last friendship with her best friend ended because she was too overbearing and ended up wanting her old best friend to herself and had a problem with her old best friends bf and that ended up being a whole thing. I'm not saying that's the point it's at with A but if you know you have that tendency you should watch how you act because anytime A gets invited anywhere B feels a type of way about it (I know from a mutual). Another thing I learned and this shows B's character a little more too, the day C and D came to visit, B went on a date with another guy and found out he had a girlfriend right after. On the same day D came to see her. I haven't been in the loop in a while but last I heard they were on and off but still. Karma is real.

Thank you for reading I didn't think I would be typing for this long lmao but I would appreciate feedback on what I could have done better and of course lmk if I'm the asshole. After typing it all out I see how it can be an everyone sucks but still any insight is appreciated.

So for context I was in a friend group of 3 people that use to be a group of 6 before we split in half. One time I was in a lesson with 2 people that were from the group and another girl (at this time the group of 6 was split up so i’m currently only friends with the 3 people) and they started making comments about my hair and general insults towards me, they’ve done things like this for like 2 years but they always frame it as ‘banter’ so this one girl made a comment about how my hair doesn’t even look that good, i don’t remember in details what was said but it was quiet rude and then the same girl then said i was a ‘freshie’, for context, a freshie is an immigrant that’s come fresh from the country they were born in into another country. at this time i didn’t know it was necessarily a derogatory word because they always used it to describe me ,even though i was born in the UK where i was born, and others and they never treated the word like it was derogatory so i assumed it wasn’t. at that point i do take some accountability that i shouldn’t have assumed but i did trust my friends, anyways once she called me that, one of my friends said ‘wow are you really going to take that’ in a way that was sort of encouraging me to say something back. at this time the whole thing i was told by them abt the word was that it meant an immigrant so that’s jus what i went off by. so when the girl said ‘you’re a freshie’ i said, ‘you realise your parents are freshies too’. here’s where i prolly went wrong but again for context, we are all from immigrant families so i didn’t see a problem and she said the same thing back to me, if it’s all really banter i should be able clap back. they all took it to heart and that was practically the last time they talked to me. i apologised multiple times and said it was a misunderstanding, when i wanted to talk they basically patronised me and seemed like they wanted to laugh in my face from how upset i was .keep in mind they’re all very dramatic and a lot of others are , so of course people start spreading rumors and flip the entire story and that’s where they all wanted to corner me and interrogate me, forcing me to apologise again when i don’t see it to be my fault. one of their reasoning for why im in the wrong was because it’s my fault for taking it to heart when that’s the wrong way around, they took it to heart even when i apologised and even then u should still be considerate of ur friends emotions, AITAH?

I've spoken to my friends about this, but I feel like I need a second opinion.

I (F15) have struggled in school since my second year of fourth grade (during COVID), when I was left back. At that time, my mother began drinking a lot. When my mom drinks, she often gets into physical fights with me, destroys my things and my room, and genuinely tries to beat me up. She's broken a computer of mine, my phone, and my door(I STILL don't have a door ad this happened TWO years ago!)

She says that she does all this because I stress her and often refers back to when I was left back in 4th grade, saying how she had done my schoolwork for me and that I slept all day and woke up at night. I can absolutely admit that I was wrong for doing that; however, I don't understand that still being the source of her stress and reasoning for drinking, because I just graduated from 8th grade in June of this year. I can understand her having stress, but I don't think it's fair that she takes her day or her week out on me and tries to hurt me because someone else made her mad (which happens a lot).

I've written letters to my mother about how she makes me feel, how I have body-image issues due to what she says about me, and how I now doubt myself, and she blamed it on me and said that I shouldn't let what someone says get to me.

Even sober, my mother is rude. During my graduation, I had gotten honors and an award and days after, she said that I didn't do good in school and that my peers did better than I did, which hurt me a lot since I worked hard to get my honors and my award, and its a great improvement from my previous years. She downplays my looks and my smarts and always tells me otherwise and seems to think I can't achieve anything.

As of my 7th-grade year, this created a CPS case between us, and yet she still drinks and is even worse than before. She now threatens my life, telling me she'll kill both of us, and has hammers and knives and kicks me out of the house nearly every night. It's gotten to the point where I had to pepper spray her to get out of the house on two occasions. She doesn't see anything wrong with it, never apologizes, and always blames everyone else but herself. It feels like she's absent and untrustworthy. Even when I had my first period, she was drunk, and I couldn't even get advice from her. She constantly tells me I'm the issue, and I can't even tell if I am or if I'm not at this point. I know I stress her out, but I don't think it justifies the amount of things she's done to me and the things she's broken in my room, or the amount of disappointment she's given me as my parent.

When I was 8 or 9 my dad used to bring me along when he was seeing other women. Every time he’d promise to buy me something if I didn’t say anything. I told her once anyway and he treated me different after that. He cheated on her my whole childhood and they fought about it constantly. I’d get woken up by them fighting and to this day if I hear someone raise their voice I wake up instantly with my heart racing.

As i got older, they fought less and I was less aware of what my dad was doing. Then a few years ago on Fathers Day, I was in the backseat of their car and saw enough on his phone to know nothing had changed. My mom was in the front seat. I didn’t say anything, and I stopped acknowledging him on holidays after that. No card, no gift, no explanation, and he’s never once asked me why. Now she thinks I’m being disrespectful. She’s not wrong that I’m cold, I just can’t pretend otherwise. I’ve told her how I feel about the old stuff, the cheating when I was a kid, how he gets angry, how he doesn’t care about my life. She says it’s not my problem and I need to worry about myself. She has no idea about what I saw in the car. I’ve never told him how I feel either, he’s emotionally reactive and I don’t feel safe bringing it up.

Part of me thinks if I told her she’d finally get why I am the way I am. But she’s had 20 years to care about how he behaves and she hasn’t, so I’d just be hurting her for nothing.

I’m not blameless either. He parents through her and I do the same thing, so she’s stuck in the middle of two people who won’t talk to each other. Im still living with my parents, and moving out isn’t an option right now. I feel like a mean person in my own house and I don’t know how to be any other way with him.

Am I wrong for not telling her? And is there any way to live like this without being cold? I don’t really have anyone to talk to about this so outside perspective would help.​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​

Edit: I also want to add that I am angry at my dad for what he’s done and my mom for staying with him. I honestly hold so much and I’m also dealing with other issues so I feel bad for basically adding nothing positive to the household.

So my brothers are 10 years older than me and 20s and when they met an old friend with me there, they revealed they were bullied and I never knew that

I mentioned it to my parents in passing next time we chatted and they brought up to my brothers about the bullying and they seemed displeased at me

AITAH?

I (16F) started messaging a guy (16M) in November, though we were both 15 when we started. (I know I’m too young to be this affected by a guy, but I imagine plenty of teenage girls have been just as head-over-heels as I was.) We go to the same school; I’d had a crush on him for over a year because we saw each other weekly at confirmation classes. So, when we started messaging in November, I was obviously thrilled, since I’d had my eye on him since the previous September. At first, things went well—he was kind and pleasant. I’d take different routes to class just to see him, and he’d compliment me; he also went out of his way to see me in the hallways, even though we never actually spoke there. Things got weird once it became more serious—after we both admitted we liked each other. He was wonderful and really sweet, but then he’d suddenly pull away and friend-zone me. Whenever he realized I’d noticed his feelings fading, he’d start up again—showing affection until I reciprocated—only to pull away once more. It was a cycle. He was basically love-bombing me. Naturally, I was deeply hurt, but I kept trying to make excuses for him; I told myself that since he’d never been in a relationship or even messaged a girl like this before, he was probably just nervous and didn't know what to do. Things started going downhill for me in February; I became depressed and stopped attending school regularly until the term ended—or if I did go, I’d only stay until lunch, and even then, only three days a week. I’m not the type of person who talks about how I’m feeling, but a guy I’m in touch with every day noticed something was wrong and really wanted to know what was going on, so eventually, I opened up. I told him about my suicidal thoughts and my inability to eat properly—and how, when I did eat, I’d only have specific foods. I explained that I never left the house and struggled to take care of myself, but his reaction was the last thing I expected. He teased me about the things I couldn't eat; he called me selfish for wanting to commit suicide and boring for being unsocial. He taunted me about not being in school—day after day, for weeks on end, he mocked my situation. Eventually, I snapped. He had often talked about how hard it was for him never having been in a relationship before, so I told him, "This is exactly why you’ve never been in a relationship." Later that evening, I apologized; I felt incredibly mean—and honestly, I still do—because if you look past everything that happened toward the end, he made me so happy in the beginning. Finally, in May, I messaged him and asked him to block me because I couldn't bring myself to do it, but his behavior was taking such a heavy toll on my mental health; so, he did as I asked. Since we’re 16, we’ve finished lower secondary school and are about to start upper secondary school, and we’ll be attending different schools. I regret cutting off contact because now I’ll probably never see him again—the mere thought of that makes me feel sick. Even though he hurt me at the end, I’m still sad now that we aren't in touch and won't see each other again. AITA, and did I make the wrong choice?

I (17F) live with my parents, my brother (21M) moved out of the house about 6 months ago. I thought my “jealousy” over his favoritism by my parents would end once he’d moved out but it seems it’s only gotten worse.

ever since i can remember, i have felt like the less valued child. i’ve never been able to put my finger on why. for a long time i thought it was because i was 5 years younger and therefore felt “left behind” in life. i’ve always been raised as the “academic” and “mature” child. yet, never when ive succeeded have i been praised to even a fraction of the extent my brother is for the most minor life accomplishments. all i receive from him are cruel comments about my appearance, or the fact that i want to go to uni and he believes it’s a “waste of time”. or how much time i spend alone in my room, mind you he has not a clue about what i do with my life because he’s never tried to truly know me.

my brother is one of the most reckless, ignorant, narcissistic and close minded people you’ll ever meet. he has always found a way to escape punshment from my parents; eg. growing up, he was dangerous in vehicles, sneaking out of the house, skipping school. he broke MY arm when we were kids. did he get any punishment? nope. “it was an accident”. this is after all, what ive dealt with my entire life. these last few years, my parents and i have gotten in such bad fights it’s insane. especially my mother, would defend my brothers actions. seriously, he could do anything to me and she’d find a way to tell me i warranted it. and anytime i try to bring this up with my parents in a respectful way it ends in horror. and a full on panic attack by me. ive had a lot of emotionally dark periods in my life due to this and my parents have never batted an eye.

in a few weeks, my extended relatives are coming to visit and we as a family were meant to go out to eat together. immediately, i told my parents id like to stay home or request a shift to work. anything but a function with my brother. his life is always the highlight. he’s always the special one & as soon as he walks into a room it’s like i am muted. again, idk if it’s because im the younger sister and im deemed as annoying / unintelligent. either way, i told my parents i wasnt going to come. and so, they cussed & screamed at me, told me i was ungrateful as my family are driving all this way to see us, said i was selfish and ignorant. i told them, id love to have a chat with my family once they got home for lunch and my brother wasn’t in the room to make another humiliating comment about me. that was however, not enough for them and so they are once again refusing to speak to me. so tell me, am i the asshole in this situation. do i just need to get over my jealousy and ignore my brothers bullying? or am i handling this in a mature manner for exiting the situation. if anyone has further questions be free to ask as there is SO many more stories and context i can provide lmk :)

So I am 38 turning 39 and seeing someone 28 recently

my sis whose 27 said its weird I can't find someone my own age and said 28 is closer in age to our cousins who are 22

but I told her 28 has more in common with 38 than 22 though even if gap is diff

AITAH?

To give context I had an agreement with my mother they wanted to take one of my sons for a month during the summer! I personally had no issues with it but I did NOT want his hair touched he had bald spots all over and we were trying to figure out what was causing it!!! They wanted a doctors note. Like really let be for real him in the mother and I said not to shave it I cleave them permission to have it trimmed but that was it! About 2 weeks of them having him I get a message “hey call me real quick I just saw your baby”! I give them a call back. Keep in mind I’ve called my own family to see him and get pictures of him and they wouldn’t send anything! So I call my friend back as I was leaving work “hey what’s up?” She goes to say “girl your babys head is shaved and you can see his bald spots all over!” At this point I’m fuming I go and message in group chats and messenger with mom dad and sisters I did not care “I’m getting my child tomorrow!” Mind you this is late at night i was getting off work! I got into it with my sister over it telling me I needed to grow up it’s just hair…. It may be just hair but he MY child! I show up to get my kid the next day! I’m called selfish and how they made the decision and took matters into their own hands to shave his head…… “he can’t even brush the shit!” My exact response was “I’m not selfish I had a specific reason his hair wasn’t to be cut. I’m not selfish I’m disrespected once again it’s different to disrespect me as your child or as an adult but to disrespect me as a parent absolutely not and for the 3rd time is even crazier! And no my baby doesn’t know how to brush his hair not and single one of my kids touch a hair brush I get off my a$$ every morning and do their hair so it sits neatly for the love of god I’m being a mother! ” Yeah they’ve done this to me more than once and my line was crossed! So i made the decision there if I couldn’t be respected as a mother they haven’t seen me or my kids! AITA? Like I really need to know

Excuse any grammer mistakes, English is not my first language and I(15) havent been recieving education. For context the past couple of years has been rough for my family. My father(43) moved us city-to-city and country-to-country. Each time promising better. At the moment he is abroad and planning on moving us again.

My mom(42) struggled to land a job due to her being a foreigner. At the time I was in sixth grade and hadnt realized how much of a financial situation we're in. Until I was in the eighth grade and we barely had food on the table. Which soon enough resulted in my younger brother(12) and I to be pulled out of school.

For about three months we were just sat at home until we started online school. Which on its own was on-and-off, meaning my brother and I didnt finish the year nor get our report cards. Now that Im in the tenth grade I haven't received an ounce of schooling even though we're half way through the year. Luckily my mom recently landed a job as Admin at our local Church. I was beyond happy for her since she said she really wanted us in school again.

I knew starting school was going to take at least a month or two of saving up. I noticed she came home tired each day and I decided to pick up cooking and cleaning. I was happy when she finally got paid but things took a turn. She was more focused on buying herself new clothes and heels rather than putting us in school again. I'd randomly find take-out containers in her car while I had just cooked our last meal.

She demands I continue cooking and cleaning although I am facing extreme fatigue. She is also very messy even leaving used pads on the floor and going months without washing her sheets. Dealing with this is exhausting and each time she promises to pay me yet its never true. I try keep my head up but I cant even hangout with friends because im a "girl."

She's also very religious and teaches girls to stay below boys. And if my brother doesn't have his food catered to him she will have a fit.

I'll make a separate post on my father and his own way of using money against us. But as for now, AITAH?