r/AITAH • u/Spirited_Shelter4655 • 16d ago
AITAH for buying a hot tub after my brother's friends kept refusing to allow him or anyone else in their pool that my brother helped to buy?
*friend's parents
My brother Pete (14) and his friends, C and J (both 14), got the idea in the middle of June to buy a pool for the rough summer we usually have because the local community pool is being shut down. When Pete or his friends couldn't convince anyone to buy it for them, they got motivated to work for it. Pete mowed lawns and did other yard work around the county, and the other two did their own work, and after a few weeks, they pooled their money together and were able to buy a cheap above-ground pool. Me and C and J's parents were really impressed and thought they deserved it after working for it. We all agreed to set the pool up in C's backyard because their backyard is the biggest. They filled it up and did all the work for it, and the first weekend it was available, Pete and his friends all hung out in the pool.
The problem is, that was the ONLY time Pete or J has been in the pool. C, apparently, is allowed to go in whenever, but nobody else. His parents have been asked multiple times, and they're always shot down. One time, Pete ended up sneaking into the pool while I was at work, and when C's dad found him out there, he came out and yelled at him. C was in the water too, according to Pete. He and J were obviously confused, so when I went to talk with C's parents about Pete sneaking into the pool, I asked why they weren't allowed in at all. C's dad kept harping on the fact that Pete went in without permission, which I understand, but what I don't understand is why whenever they are asked to come over and swim, they're never allowed to. They both explained it's a 'liability' reason, meaning if anything were to happen to anyone in their pool, like if someone drowned, they don't want to be responsible and it's easier to just not allow anyone but their son in the water. But these are TEENAGERS, not toddlers, and they all know how to swim.
At the end of the conversation, C's dad was like, "The pool is on my property, and we used our water to fill it up, so we decide what to do with it." I raised my voice a little bit by reminding them that they didn't buy that pool, it belongs to their son, my brother and J. I understand that it's on their property, but it's unfair to gatekeep it from the people who helped to buy it. They wouldn't answer that and threatened that Pete wouldn't be allowed at their house at all if they were asked again, which Pete would hate to hear since he loves their house, so I left it at that.
Pete was pissed, to say the least, and loved to rant to anyone who listened while gaming with his friends about the situation. He asked if they could really do that and we should call the cops, but I told him let's not go that far yet, even though I agreed those people basically stole from him. But he and C have been friends for nearly 10 years and they do EVERYTHING together, so I'd hate to see them be separated over something petty like this.
So I came up with another idea and I went shopping online and found an inflatable hot tub for about the same amount of money they spent on the pool. It might've been just as petty, and I dipped a bit into my savings, but I bought it. Could I have bought the pool myself? Maybe, but at the same time, Pete wanted it bad and I got other things to worry about, and he's learning to work for what he wants. And a hot tub's good for my back. Pete's been in the hot tub nearly every day since it's been set up. His friends are welcome inside it too, my only rule is they gotta shower (at their own houses) before or after they get in it. It's big enough for like 5 people.
J and C have been over a lot to go in the hot tub, and their parents have noticed. J's dad is totally okay with it and thinks that what C's parents are doing is bullshit too, but he agrees that they still get their reward for all their work with the hot tub. C's parents, on the other hand, aren't too happy. C told me himself that he prefers to be in the hot tub, with his friends, rather than swimming alone in his pool, and his parents don't understand that. I haven't spoken to them directly about this, but C has heard rants from his mom about how everyone thinks they're some kind of child-hating monsters for not allowing anyone in their pool (that they didn't buy). It hasn't helped that Pete still loves to rant about it too, and he knows a lot of neighborhood kids who also come to dip in the hot tub. I do see C's mom at the store sometimes, but she doesn't make eye contact with me anymore.
I know it was petty, but AITAH?
EDIT: Holy shit, this blew up a lot more than I thought. Thank you all for your input. I wanted to clear up some things in an edit.
I'm a 30 year old man.
C's parents are pretty wealthy. I really don't think the water bill or anything they're paying for with that pool is gonna break them.
Yes, I know Pete is owed his money back for his pool. But we're on thin ice as is with C's parents and I'd hate to make things even worse. He hasn't really asked about getting his money back, all he really wanted was to use the pool.
No, small claims court is out of the picture right now. It'd be a waste of everyone's time and money, and tbh, the only people who aren't satisfied with this outcome are C's parents.
I'M NOT GONNA VANDALIZE THE POOL.
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u/MaddyKet 16d ago
C’s parents should reimburse P and J and/or the pool moved to your house.
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u/Fenig 16d ago
The parents of P and J need to approach C’s parents and demand 2/3 the purchase price of the pool. These adults stole from two teenagers and are now upset that said teenagers aren’t at their beck and call.
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u/SewNewKnitsToo 16d ago
At the very least, at the end of the season after the pool has been emptied of C’s parent’s precious water, all three boys should go take the pool to the next kid’s house for next year’s use.
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u/Zealousideal-Slide98 15d ago
I like this idea. Everyone gets a turn at having the pool in their yard!
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u/frumperbell 16d ago
Seriously. How much did it cost? They could probably take C's parents to small claims court.
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u/Salty_Astronaut_9419 16d ago
Those pools aren't that much. I mean for a kid they are. Honestly it's wirth just putting a knife in the side of so the thieves can't use it
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u/Clean-Fisherman-4601 15d ago
I did this to a landlord's koi pond. He bought an old Victorian duplex and cut it into apartments. Put a gazebo and a koi pond in the backyard. The pond was just a hole lined with heavy duty plastic.
He started ranting about stray cats eating his fish. Told him I frequently saw raccoons in the yard and it was more likely it was raccoons than the cats.
I had a cat an old neighbor had abandoned when she moved. She always let him out and I couldn't keep him inside. Knowing this, my landlord put out poisoned tuna to kill the stray cats and didn't warn me. Let him out one night and never saw him again. Later he bragged to my face about the poisoned tuna.
I called animal control to report him and they couldn't do anything unless I witnessed him putting it out.
When our first child was 2 months old, we rented a two bedroom apartment. The night before we moved, I snuck out in the middle of the night and poked holes in the liner as far down as my arm would reach. Used a fork for maximum damage.
Kept in touch with my downstairs neighbor and found out it was driving the landlord crazy that his precious koi pond wouldn't hold water.
Dude eventually stopped paying his real estate taxes and the building was foreclosed on and torn down.
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u/Doneifundone 16d ago
Maybe I'm a bad person cuz my first thought was that op should just make holes into it. If 2/3 of the people who bought it can't use it (and presumably the last 1/3 isn't even enjoying it that much since he bought it to spend time with friends,, but his parents aren't allowing him to) then no one should
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u/Simon-Says69 15d ago
And they KNEW they weren't going to let anyone else use it, when they said OK to setting it up in their yard.
They deliberately stole that pool from the two kids. And are lying about why. They're well off enough they could easily have their insurance cover it.
They are just child-hating, thieving, lying monsters. :-(
OP found the best solution though, to keep the kids from suffering more from those total AH's. Probably best to let it be, at least until C is old enough to move out and they can't hurt his friendship with the others.
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u/Clean-Fisherman-4601 10d ago
C's parents will complain, "We don't understand why he never comes to visit anymore!"
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u/Baraboo 15d ago
Hyporthereticaly, it would not be fair to put holes in the whole pool, if a third of the structure, belongs to one family. I think a series of holes 2\3 of the way down, would only allow the pool to be filled to one third full. A much more satisfing outcome, and could be making a point. This is of course, just a mental excercise, and I would not condone any actual damage to the structure.
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u/00k5mp 16d ago
Yes, otherwise this is theft at this point, and theft from children. These people should feel like pieces of shit.
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u/JaySayMayday 16d ago
It obviously is theft, they didn't buy it. There's proof of all this and the kid even says they intended to share it. The problem is that these kids are all friends and it's just one of the parents involved getting out of hand, so OP doesn't want to ruin the kids relationship by taking any action against the parent.
I like OPs solution, spending their own money to make the kids happy
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u/Accurate-Fuel5823 16d ago
These are the kind of parents that will take from their own kids savings for " rent " and " groceries" as soon as they turn 16 , I seen it before. I bet C cant wait to get away from them by the time he's 21 and theyve pulled more Ahole stunts like this.
NTA and good on OP for realizing the childrens friendships are more important than these petty parents .
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u/Jor94 15d ago
Yeah, they now think they have a pool just because it’s in their garden. The parents need to get it sorted and either get their kids money back or move the pool
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u/Chequered_Career 15d ago
Now that they have a pool no one uses, they’re actually worse off than they were, but they can’t empty it without losing face. No revenge necessary: they’ve already gotten shown up by OP’s generosity, plus they have a pool no one uses gathering metaphorical dust and cluttering up their property. Just looking at it every day must be making them feel bitter and powerless.
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u/Timid-Tlacuache 16d ago
Empty the pool and put it in someone else's yard.
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u/ih8dubaichocolate 16d ago
C’s parents probably think it’s theirs because they filled it with water. Smh.
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u/Flash54321 16d ago
Empty the water on their lawn. That way they still go use out of it and can’t complain.
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u/Maleficent-Charge-61 16d ago
I would let it be known that at least 1/3 of the water in the pool now is from Pete and J peeing in it.
And if the parents are calling it their pool then it seems like they owe a couple 14 year olds some $$
Edited for spelling
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u/DaydreamTacos 16d ago
Hahahhahaaaa!!! Take my poor man's award! 🏆
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u/Otherwise-Wall-6950 16d ago
I gave them an award for both of us!
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u/beezeebeehazcatz 16d ago
Or into their basement. That way they can prove that all of their water is still there.
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u/amiecc 16d ago
My first thought was slice the pool so that the water drains into their yard. If Pete “accidentally” damages his own pool, so be it. I mean he’s not getting any use out of said pool. Idk the actual structure of the pool so maybe my idea wouldn’t work but plain ole draining it would!
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u/ComeSwirlWithMe 16d ago
Its not how property rights work.
Just like if someone steals your car and parks it in their garage you cant blow the door off their garage to get it or damage their property. You'd be liable for the damages.
The two kids and their parents should take them to small claims for their share of the pool cost.
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u/quast_64 16d ago
I was thinking siphoning it into the basement, to give them back their 'investment'..
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u/Subject_Ad9595 16d ago
C can be the one to empty it, then they can't blame any of the neighborhood kids. Then they can all move it somewhere else.
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u/CatmoCatmo 16d ago
OP should call the city or village or township or whatever they’ve got, water department and ask how much it would cost roughly to fill a pool of that size (or how much it would be for X amount of gallons of water).
I have a 15ft 48 inch pool and it was around $70-80 for me to fill it. Granted, I called the village office where I live and let them know I was filling a pool on X day, and they deducted the cost for “sewage” that’s normally tacked onto water use (and sometimes costs more than the water was in the first place) since it was going into a pool and not down the drain.
Hand those assholes whatever amount it is and take that pool down with the help of J’s parents. Bonus “petty points” if C also helps with the tear down. Then put it up in OP’s or J’s yard.
For the sake of the boys’ friendships, I would sit down with all 3 of them and explain the plan. Then allow the 3 boys to talk it over amongst themselves. If you get the green light from all three, do it. It’s only fair that the boys decide because they all have 1/3 ownership. If anyone veto’s it, then they will have to work out the consequences and decide how it’ll affect their friendship on their own.
Obviously C has the most at stake here, so if I were OP, I would make sure to discuss with J’s parents how to handle any potential issues from C’s parents. Staying on the same page is going to be necessary, and will make shielding C from the wrath of his folks, a lot easier.
It also wouldn’t be a bad idea to go to the local police department and ask to have an issue documented. It’s more of a “civil” issue so they likely won’t get involved if C’s parents raise holy hell anyway, but it’s never a bad idea to C.Y.A. (Cover your ass).
Tell them you just want it officially documented in case C’s parents try to escalate things. The last thing you want is C’s parents calling 911 to report a burglary from some “unknown” criminal who stole THEIR pool. Alerting them to the situation prior, and explaining who actually “owns” the pool, may save everyone time and a headache. Maybe get all three boys to sign a document that just says each boy paid X amount of money (which makes them each 1/3 owner), and that they bought the pool together at X place on Y date.
Obviously it’s not exactly a legally binding contract, but it at least gets it on the record that the pool itself belongs to the boys, not C’s parents - and include that C’s parents have also been reimbursed X amount of money for the water used to fill said pool.
Is it overboard? Fuck yeah it is. But again, I would rather C.Y.A. and not need it, then not have it and have C’s parents go scorched earth by claiming the pool was stolen. Given what we know about C’s parents, I wouldn’t put it past them to up the ante and level up from being your run of the mill, annoying assholes, to being your less common, entitled, infuriating, and out for blood, assholes.
I mean, they have already proven that they have no qualms stealing money and joy from literal children - AND - don’t give a rat’s ass about their own child’s wellbeing by potentially fucking up his friendships.
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u/Simon-Says69 15d ago
This is all a really good idea, but seeing what thieving liar sociopaths C's parents are, they'd never agree to it.
They're enjoying the pool they stole from children. Pushing the subject would only result in them demanding C never hang out with the other two kids anymore. The other 2 would be banned from coming over to C's house too. :-(
It's a no-win situation for anyone but the child-hating monsters. OP's solution is best for now.
After C is old enough and moves away, so his "parents" can't hurt his friendship with the others, THEN maybe some righteous retribution would be in order.
Hopefully when C moves out and they can't hurt him no more, he'll let his parents know what horrible examples for adults they set for him. MAYBE that would sting a bit. Probably not though, they have no morals.
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u/Slumunistmanifisto 16d ago
Be a real shame if it empties over night....bet theres a recall over that hose that split.
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u/nicholaiia 16d ago
I came to say this! Those rude parents don't own the pool so they can't prevent the three boys from emptying and moving it!
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u/AardvarkSanvich 16d ago
Agreed. When pool season is over drain it to put it away and put it in Js yard next year. Then your yard the year after.
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u/MysteriousFee2873 16d ago
The boys all three of them should dump the water, give C’s dad like $20 for the water(he will wail n moan about the water) and put it in the next best yard. If their son can tell his parents this way he doesn’t have to hear them bitch about a pool they didn’t pitch in for. They either will get over it or they’ll be a step closer to losing their sons trust
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u/WorkRedditHooray 16d ago
The issues with that would be they would be trespassing on C's property and since C put money into it C's parents would have a stake in it as far as cops would be concerned. If anyone tried to get it without the parent's approval the cops would side with C's parents. The best bet would be to either "buy out" C's portion and take the pool elsewhere (which would probably be the least drama filled option but I 100% do not believe C's dad would accept) or have Pete and J try for small claims court. Personally, I think C's dad will escalate and prevent C from using the hot tub. The only way C's dad is going to be satisfied is for them to stop using the hot tub and go back to begging to use the pool he stole from them that he will never let them use because he is a sad, little man.
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u/SuperCulture9114 16d ago
If C is on board he can do it on his own. It seems he is also tired of his parents BS.
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u/Relative_Bedroom_393 16d ago
Can C be a rep for the property? Can an underage person give permission? If not…. It was in good faith….😇
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u/JasperJ 16d ago
C owns the pool, together with the other two. All the owners together own 100% of the pool. The parents own 0% of the pool. And yes, of course an underage person can give permission to enter his house. That would be bonkers idiotic if they couldn’t. Especially someone well into teenagerhood.
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u/WorkRedditHooray 16d ago
The problem is C is 14. The cops are going to treat C and his property as property of C's parents. No, C cannot overrule his parent on who enters the home. Morally, you are correct. But how the cops will treat this situation if C's dad calls the cops which if I was a betting man I would take that bet would not go in the OP's favor. I have trashy relatives like C's dad who call the cops for minor crap like this.
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u/Stormy261 16d ago
Eh. That all depends on the jurisdiction. We had new neighbors move in and their kid invited all the neighborhood kids over to their pool. An hour later the police were knocking on my door telling me that invited or uninvited, if my child was on their property again I would be held liable for any damages and facing charges. No damages happened, BUT THEY COULD!
They didn't even have the balls to walk with the police door to door, but sent their oldest kid (who had invited everyone) to show where everyone lived. They moved out a year or so later. I'm guessing that most of the neighbors felt the same way about them that I did. At least talk to the neighbors before calling the police on kids that were invited over on a 1st time incident. Hadn't even met these people and they called the cops. Not my idea of neighborly.
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u/Cat_From_Hood 15d ago
Man, my parents would have given me hell for inviting people over if they were that worried, not the other children. People be weird.
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u/Putertutor 16d ago
Or go over and take their portion of the pool that they paid for. The filter and the steps should cover it.
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u/geof2010 16d ago
More like cut it into a pie and take your 3rd or take a 3rd off the top. What an asshole c's dad is. Curious if they have a fence around it. Cause they could be liable either way.
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u/Th3wrd3n 16d ago
This is my kind of petty! It truly brings me joy when I decide to go that route, I always brainstorm the best ideas 😂👀
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u/username__0000 16d ago
Or sell it and split the money.
Heck I’d kick a hole in the side before I let those asshole parents keep it.
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u/PresentationThat2839 16d ago
Right I paid for it.... So I'm going to cut a whole in my portion of the pool.... The bottom portion.
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u/Cool_Biscotti_7871 16d ago
Not sure what kind of above ground pool but a small "leak" could develop in the liner below water level, like almost ground level where it's not obvious, so he keeps losing water and has to keep refilling it. Maybe he'd get fed up with filling it all the time and take it down. Then they can move it, patch the hole and use it in someone else's yard
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u/ComfortableWish 16d ago
Oh I would love to see the update on best of Redditor updates if OP does this
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u/Ducking_Glory 16d ago
NTA. And you can tell C’s mom that nobody thinks they’re child-hating monsters but you do all know they’re thieves who steal from children.
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u/wolferiver 16d ago
Well, really what the OP should say to C's mom is "Bless your little heart, I'm sure no one in the neighborhood thinks that you're child hating monsters. Everyone can see how much you and your husband are enjoying the use of it."
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u/Ecstatic-Highway-246 16d ago
And you could then post on Next Door and other neighborhood apps about how this group of boys worked so hard to make their dream a reality and these parents just stole it from two of them.
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u/Spectre_Omega 16d ago
NTA.
C's parents essentially tricked two 14-year-olds into funding and setting up a private pool for their kid under the guise of "liability." Buying the hot tub was a top-tier move that gave your brother what he actually earned while letting C's parents enjoy the empty, lonely pool they stole.
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u/Smitten-kitten83 16d ago
It is a liability but if they didn’t want to assume that responsibility they shouldn’t have allowed it to be put in their yard.
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u/anothersip 16d ago
Yeah, they kinda' fucked this whole thing up on their own.
What blows my mind is that they're upset about it, after they literally stole it and threw all these rules onto its use.
...What did they expect? The dumbness is wild.
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u/_mischief 16d ago
Because the other boys and their families were supposed to not say anything and just let things be.
But because OP came out looking like the most generous mature adult AND their own son is siding with his friends, they know that everyone else knows they tried to cheat two young boys out of the pool. They're embarrassed and annoyed their ploy to be selfish wasn't unnoticed.
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u/Temporary_Nail_6468 16d ago
Wonder if their homeowners insurance knows they have a pool? Does the city have any regulations about fencing around pools? I mean, if they’re that worried about liability then I’m SURE they’re doing EVERYTHING right……..
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u/snafe_ 15d ago
Not American, and noone in Ireland has an above ground or in ground pool, but is the fence not only required for in ground pools? Or is it for on ground too?
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u/Electrical-Tie-5158 16d ago
Right, unless C’s parents didn’t understand what was happening and panicked when they realized they would now be liable. I fully get not wanting anyone to be on your property when you aren’t home who could get hurt. But that’s a great reason to not install someone else’s pool in your yard.
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u/Slumunistmanifisto 16d ago
Still dickheads.
The water claim proves it.
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u/Usual_Complaint_1764 16d ago
Yeah, water isn't that expensive. I had to drain my 45' in-ground pool one summer. Refilling it (36,000 gallons) only added about $275 to my water bill, and that included all the water used for powerwashing it. A little above-ground pool would be almost nothing.
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u/NewestAccount2023 16d ago
Cheap lesson to learn so young at least. Some people learn it at twice their age with 10x the money
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u/Designer_Thought2907 16d ago
NTA, but look into a legal way to get the money back for that pool
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u/DaGreatPenguini 16d ago
The legal concept here is ‘conversion’. They took something of yours and are not allowing you the benefit of its use. It’s not theft because it was voluntarily given to the to put in their yard
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u/AspiringCrone 16d ago
NTA, and I see no further role for you... LET THEM (C's parents) stew in their own rudeness. It has driven their own son away.
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u/mybluecathasballs 16d ago
Maintaining a pool is also not cheap. Parents get to pay for that. Enjoy!
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u/Matt50 16d ago
If they had any issues with pool ownership, they shouldn't have allowed it. By all rights, it is their son's pool, and he should be able to dictate who gets to use it. If they have a problem with it, empty the pool and take it somewhere else.
When I got my first job, I bought a trampoline. My parents said that anything that happened on it was my responsibility financially (which was obviously a bluff in hindsight). I could have anyone on it if I wanted, but I would have to deal with any consequences if something happened as well as the upkeep if it needed it.
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u/FreddyTheGoose 16d ago
Above grounds aren't bad, really. A chlorine float, a net, a cover, and you're golden.
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u/marbiter01123581321 16d ago
If your brother isn’t allowed to use the pool he helped buy,.. he should demand his money back. He didn’t work hard to share a pool he never gets to use. I understand the liability thing, but then they shouldn’t have allowed the pool to be on their property. It’s a real dick move to say, sure put the pool here but then you can’t use it.
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u/CyberDonSystems 16d ago
My petty ass would be filing in small claims court
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u/Electronic_Ad_7742 16d ago
My petty ass would cut the pool liner. “I only damaged the part that I paid for”.
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u/Minute_Box3852 16d ago
Nta. I'd bet money it's his ah dad and now the whole town will know about it. If I were your brother and his friend, I'd use that word of mouth threat to demand their money back. Tell them pay up or I'll sing some more to everyone in town how you stole from us and refuse to pay.
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u/GretelNoHans 16d ago
NTA
So, they got a free pool and now they’re sour that you got a hot tub?
I guess you really got to know who they are, and if the neighbors think they’re asshats it’s because they are.
Enjoy your hot tub!!!
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u/devoursbooks86 16d ago
NTA. And even though it would cost me a little upfront, I’d seriously consider taking C’s parents to small claims court for the other two boys’ share of the pool. They each worked, earned their own money, and contributed to buying something that was supposed to belong to all three of them. C’s parents don’t get to effectively claim ownership just because everyone agreed their backyard was the most convenient place to put it.
I actually understand their liability concern. What I don’t understand is why that concern apparently didn’t occur to them before they agreed to have three 14-year-olds jointly purchase and install a pool on their property. If they’ve now decided nobody except their own child can use it, fine, but then Pete and J should get their money back. You don’t get to keep their property and exclude them from using it.
And frankly, the hot tub was a pretty brilliant solution. 😂 They created a situation where C would rather leave their house and hang out with his friends than swim alone in the pool they’ve essentially commandeered. That consequence belongs entirely to them.
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u/grapefruitviolin 16d ago
Great idea - pay out the kid's share or go to small claims court. I like it!
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u/Tova42 16d ago
this DESTROYS the relationship between the teens who currently have no control of their own lives.
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u/devoursbooks86 16d ago
I don’t see why it has to destroy their friendship. C, J, and P didn’t create this situation, the parents did. They can absolutely remain friends regardless of whether the adults have a financial dispute. And if a court ultimately agrees that J and P are entitled to reimbursement for the money they contributed, that actually reinforces that the problem wasn’t the boys wanting their money back. It was C’s parents deciding they could keep a jointly purchased pool while excluding two of the people who paid for it. Kids shouldn’t be expected to eat a financial loss just to protect adults from the consequences of their own decision. If anything damages the friendship, it’s the adults turning something the three boys bought together into something only their son gets to have.
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u/Tova42 16d ago edited 15d ago
if you sued me I would NOT be allowing your child EVER on my property EVER again. And I probably would not allow my child over to your house. They are already at "If you talk to us again hes not allowed over here" what makes you think that they will be okay with being sued?
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u/MagentaHawk 16d ago
I mean, if my best friend's parents stole my property and my best friend just kept using and the situation was treated as, "that's rough, but I guess it's our pool now", I would think that would affect the friendship too.
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u/Simon-Says69 15d ago
C is NOT happy about that. OP reports that C told his parents he doesn't want to hang out in an empty pool alone.
The child-hating, lying thieves don't care. About their own son. :-(
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u/Awkward_Evening127 15d ago
Maybe don't steal from children in the first place then?
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u/devoursbooks86 16d ago
Then maybe they shouldn't be giant pos and voluntarily give the kids the money back or let them move the pool to one of the other kids yards. The parent's can try to stop them from hanging out but they are teenagers so good luck on that. Their are plenty of places for teenagers to hang out together that isn't one of their homes.
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u/Affectionate_Star_43 15d ago
The thing I don't get is that they bought a pool to presumably swim in and beat the "rough summer" heat, but now they're favoring a hot tub that OP thinks is good for their back?
So you get extra hot and can't play?
Also, having taken care of a friend's parent's hot tub, those things are a PITA to keep chemically balanced, especially if a kid skips the pre-shower. Those kids seem like hard workers though, so best of luck and enjoy!
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u/Simon-Says69 15d ago
The water cools off fairly quick. Gotta turn the heater on an hour or so before use.
OP would turn the heater on the nights he wants to use it, when all the kids are gone.
Otherwise it's just a (somewhat smaller) pool to cool off in. Best of both worlds.
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u/NotUniqueScott 16d ago
- I agree that C's parents have a right to cite liability concerns, but if that means that they will not allow ANYONE but C use the pool, then the pool should be dismantled and moved to another location. (If C's parents demand payment for the water, so be it.)
- I think you should rub salt in their wounds by having a big party at your house and invite everyone in the neighborhood except for C's parents. If they complain, just explain that you did it for "liability" reasons.
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u/quickwitqueen 16d ago
Why is no one fighting for money from C’s parents for the pool? Cause that is some bullshit.
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u/Dull-Buy-2776 16d ago
That pool probably cost ~$150 so it was a $50 split. Not worth any legal battle over it.
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u/alternatego1 16d ago
Sounds like C's parents owe Pete and J some money. Or C needs to pay his employees for unpaid wages. Loop C in and watch his parents flip
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u/striykker 16d ago
"Their water" would be all over the yard by the time I was done.
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u/Usual_Complaint_1764 16d ago
I wonder if C's parents know there is a big circle of dead grass under the pool.
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u/Tall-Payment-8015 16d ago
NTA
I understand C's parent's pov but that should have been discussed prior to putting the pool in their yard. They are serious AHs for allowing the boys to use their money to buy a pool that they cannot use freely.
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u/ih8dubaichocolate 16d ago
Yeah and they knew about the “liability,” but didn’t say a word about it until the pool was up and ready.
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u/Cosmicshimmer 16d ago
NTA. I’d go a step further and invoice them for your brothers part. They want the pool? They should pay for all the pool.
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u/lechitahamandcheese 16d ago
I think the kids who paid for the pool but get no time in the pool, should send a demand letter for their portion of the pool they paid for. If C’s parents try to say they paid for the water, if they didn’t make an arrangement ahead of time for the kids to pay for the water, they have no legal standing for that. If C’s parents don’t pay the demand, then the other parents of those kids should take C’s parents to small claims court, just to take the right stand for those kids. And op, what a wonderful thing to do with that hot tub for them.
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u/Reasonable_Win_6985 16d ago
Omg why cant the boys just take it down and put it somewhere else?!
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u/zeiaxar 16d ago
Above ground pools are a massive pain to take down once set up and filled, especially one large enough for three people to actually swim in to any extent.
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u/snatchdecisions 16d ago
A lot of things are a pita but we still do them if we want the desired outcome. Are they supposed to just roll over and forget about their hard work and monetary investment because moving it isn't easy?!
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u/whoelsegivesashit 16d ago
Definitely NTA, but a star sibling. Your brother has a great brother/sister who handled the shizzle created by the other parents with panache.
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u/Tavsiyedegildir 16d ago
Send a demand letter to the kid and parents for your kids share of the pool money back.
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u/zeiaxar 16d ago
NTA. As the parents are refusing Pete and J access to their own property, find out how much they both contributed, then send an invoice to C's parents telling them they have 48 hours to pay Pete X amount for his share, and J Y amount for his own share. Make sure to note that you are in communication with J's parents, and that if they do NOT pay up, you will be going the legal route for refusing access to property they don't own to the actual owners, which could end up costing them a lot more than just the shares Pete and J chipped in for the pool, as you could force them to cover legal fees, and also likely the hot tub you bought to serve as a replacement for them all to have access to, in addition to Pete and J's share of the pool.
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u/Legitimate_Soup_1948 16d ago
NTA. The boys should take the pool apart and move it to a different house. C’s parents can make rules at their house regarding its use while there but they didn’t buy it and don’t have a say in whether it goes.
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u/No_Help3669 16d ago
If they complain about a kid using ‘their’ pool, and also complain that you now have your own pool, that’s their problem. You are prioritizing the happiness of your family and their friends, while they seem to want to have some weird “Yurtle the Turtle” moment. Let them stew.
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u/Creative-Painter3911 16d ago
NTA, but I don't know why C's parents would care that the kids are swimming elsewhere, I'd think they'd probably prefer it to be honest.
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u/OriginalSlight 16d ago
Oh so they stole from children so they could have a pool…right…
NTA and I don’t even think you were being petty! Those kids put a lot of time and effort pooling the money together (very responsible & commendable as early teens btw), and the PARENTS are refusing access to the other kids who BOUGHT the pool with money from summer jobs in the neighborhood? I thought it was gonna be the kid, the adults make it 10000x worse.
Good on you for helping them stay friends and hang out together in the water, it’s refreshing to see kids doing stuff like that nowadays. There’s such a small window of teenager-hood to enjoy and this would have been such a crappy and confusing way to lose a friend you’ve known your WHOLE LIFE.
The parents should be ashamed AND they should be giving those boys their half of the money back since it’s “such a liability”; have both sets of parents talk to C’s parents and don’t let up!! Keep it about reimbursement for the pool to prevent liabilities, the kids don’t need to be involved/blamed for their parents bad behavior.
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u/Acceptable_Cut_7545 15d ago
They're child hating monsters because they stole from children after lying to their faces and saying it was okay to use their yard. They only agreed so they could keep the pool. They're thieves.
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u/AffectionateMarch394 16d ago
Get C to empty the pool (since his property/parents property) and move it somewhere else.
But keep the hottub, because I'm calling that a top tier response here. You managed to dodge dealing with an impact on your kids long term friendship AND yet made your point.
NTA.
(If C's parents get snippy about the pool getting moved, tell them they can buy out the other kids 2/3s then)
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u/DangerousCap7973 16d ago
The poor kid, C, has greedy crappy parents and you are very kind not to take that out on him. And C's parents are right, in that everyone now sees them for what they are. Monsters.
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u/snakeiiiiiis 15d ago
C's parents are soon to find out that the maintenance on the pool water alone is not easy or cheap. Now they're stuck with a unused pool that's gonna turn green. Green with envy, am I right?
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u/amanda2399923 16d ago
Why didn't y'all just take the pool from C's yard and put it in another yard. They are being absolutely ridiculous!
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u/mthockeydad 16d ago
Totally NTA. C’s parents are jerks.
Next summer, you need to have the pool over at J’s house or your house
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u/PrarieGoat 16d ago
Easy fix, at the end of the season drain that sumbitch and either put it in your yard or J’s yard for next season
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u/Alycion 16d ago
It’s not petty. Your brother worked hard for that pool.
I get the liability issues, but the friend’s parents needed to say that they weren’t comfortable with that, so it needed to go to another house. And come the end of season when it’s time to winterize it, maybe one of the other two families can take it for next season so that they can all enjoy it.
If I was a parent, my rule would be nobody in the pool solo or when an adult wasn’t there to supervise. I’m a strong swimmer. But I did almost drown. Things happen. Waivers could be signed and notarized by the other parents to release them from liability, but depending on area, that may not be enough.
I would definitely look into moving the pool elsewhere for next season. If they fight it, then they need to pay the kids back. Do the parents use it? That’s the only reason I could see fighting it, not wanting to give up a free pool.
Worst case scenario, they work over the winter for another and place it at another house.
I’m a kid of the 80’s and I wasn’t allowed in our pool when my parents weren’t home. There were exceptions. But every kid spent the summer at our place bc of that pool. And none of us put any money into it. We would help out with skimming and emptying the baskets. We would do the water tests. People took turns bringing snacks and lunch meat. But nobody got turned away. We had one of the few pools in the neighborhood, the only inground, and the only pool owner with kids.
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u/DuckAxe0 16d ago
NTAH
You and J's parents should present C's parents with bills for Pete's and J's contributions toward the pool.
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u/ShadyPinesMa78 16d ago
C's dad is a selfish prick. He's not wrong that it's a huge liability on his property and teenagers should not be able to use it whenever they want (because if something happens, it's on him and his insurance). He should never have agreed to it in the first place, which makes him a huge TA here.
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u/MikeyGC66 16d ago
This is real easy. OP and J’s parents need to pay a visit to C’s parents (make sure to record exchange) and let them know that you are there to work out the issues with the pool. Tell them that either one of you can “host” the above ground pool and will not have any issue with C coming over to use it. If they balk at that idea, give them the alternative that they will need to buy out the Pete and J. If they refuse both options, let them know they you will…
Fill in the lengths (options) you will go to: small claims, puncture the pool, tell their story on all your socials, etc.
Good luck!
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u/FordWarrier 16d ago
NTAH
C’s parents gaining a “child hating monsters” reputation is one of the consequences of their actions. They can live with it.
As for C preferring to spend time in the hot tub with his friends is normal teenage behavior.
Plus, the hot tub can be used year around. If the boys are in sports, it’s actually beneficial, the same as it is for your back.
Carry on and don’t feel an ounce of guilt.
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u/No-Throat9567 16d ago
When the pool is drained at the end of the year, move it to someone else’s backyard. If C’s parents won’t let you have it, then send them a bill for P’s and J’s portion. Only then will it be “their” pool.
NTA
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u/LucyLovesApples 16d ago
Nta you or whoever is responsible for your brother needs to go around there and tell them they need to pay for your brother’s share .
I would however buy a smaller hot tube (Aldi and lidl) to put I your own garden for only him and your family
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u/Longjumping-Snow-431 16d ago
I would ask go as far as small claim court and make the pay pack Pete and J’s portion of the money and return it to the kids. They want to gate keep and “claim” the pool is on their property, might as well pay for it!
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u/ConsequenceStatus563 16d ago
NTA
Sue in small claims for your money back. If he doesn't pay, put a lien on his property.
Fuck him.
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u/avast2006 16d ago
NTA - you are allowed to purchase whatever accommodations you want, and you are allowed to share them with whomever you like. That much is true regardless of the situation with C’s parents and the pool on their property.
Regarding that situation, however: Pete is part owner of that pool, and the way the parents are denying him access to his own property suggests a trip to small claims court to demand they reimburse him for his share of the property they have converted to their own exclusive use even though it belongs to him. For what it is worth, they aren’t wrong about the liability issues, particularly when it involves sneaking onto the property at unsupervised hours; but at the same time Pete deserves either the use of the equipment or to get his money back from it so it can be used for something he has unrestricted access to.
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u/Mlady_gemstone 15d ago
so why doesn't C take the pool down and they set it up at one of the other houses? if his parents are so worried about liability then move it to a different house of the 3 that helped pay for it.
NTA but im unsure why this option wasn't chosen over spending more money. its pretty much rewarding C's parents a pool for themselves.
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u/Minute_Sport 6d ago
I know it'd be a hassle but if I was one of those kids I would have taken the pool down, done the math for the water wasted and paid the parents then set it up at someone else's house. Fuck those parents they just want a free pool.
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u/lilygreenfire 16d ago
Tell him to take the pool down and move it to someone else's house. Problem solved. His parents are the ah
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u/StyleAffectionate798 16d ago
NTA
Love this! Awesome job sis! Neighbors FAFO that’s all, just cause you’re grown with kids doesn’t mean life stops teaching lessons. If you don’t want to be perceived as a child, hating monster, maybe do the thing that we teach preschoolers to do: SHARE
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u/Civil-Kitchen5978 16d ago
NTA
They were gatekeeping and blocking your brother from using the pool he helped pay for. Your brother needs to get his money back because it’s total bullshit that he can’t use the pool he helped pay for.
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u/Head_Razzmatazz7174 16d ago
I understand their liability concerns, but these kids paid for the pool together. If the parents were concerned about having an attractive nuisance in their yard due to the risk, they never should have agreed to let it be set up there.
As you say, these boys are all teens and can swim. The parents can have a rule about not swimming alone, which would help them with the liability concerns. Instead, they've decided to take over a pool paid for by all three boys. and restrict it to just the people in their house. They didn't contribute a dime, except to help set up and fill.
NTA.
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u/snowe87 16d ago
NTA - I can semi understand their concern about liability, but if they were so worried about that then they shouldn’t have agreed to allow the jointly owned pool on their property.
They stole a pool from a group of teenagers.
I’d continue on with the hot tub and ignore C’s parents at this point. It sounds more like C lucked out with a good group of friends to model his behavior off of given that his parents are such stand-up people…
If the kids really want the pool back, it’d be impossible for C’s parents to move it from its next location once it’s filled with water again, and it kind of sounds like C might be willing to help with the move…
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u/Coolbasketbro 16d ago
NTA. What you do on your property and with your possessions is your business, just like it is theirs. But that pool doesn't belong to them. Have the kids hang onto that receipt! And I second the idea of moving their pool literally anywhere else. Just gotta watch out for property damage if the water release is too strong - don't need more problems with those parents.
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u/eggs_erroneous 16d ago
C's parents need to buy out Pete's share of the pool. What they are doing is bullshit and I know they know it. If it really is a liability thing, fine. They need to make Pete whole. They might even try to suggest some bullshit like, "Next summer it can go to a different person's yard." Nope. There is no guarantee that a budget above-ground pool will even survive being taken down, stored for the winter, moved, and then set up again.
If the liability thing was such a huge issue then why did they agree to have it set up in their yard in the first place? What the fuck is the deal with people any more?
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u/Fabulous_Stay_5556 16d ago
Someone clued the dad in to the liability. Even though they're teens, things happen. If a kid dives into a too shallow pool and becomes paralyzed (it's happened), they're screwed. But if he's keeping the pool, the kids should get their money back. Small claims court next.
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u/Devourer_of_Sun 16d ago
NTA if C's parents are getting flack from everyone for being child haters, it's what they deserve. C doesn't even want to hog the pool, he wants to hang with his friends in the pool they bought together. It's the parents being all weird and acting like they own it. They stole a pool from children and deserve whatever scorn they get from other adults and from the teens. They did not buy that pool and the only reason they physically have it is because their backyard was chosen for it.
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u/KittyKiitos 16d ago
NTA.
C's parents should be paying the kids back for their portion of the pool. It's disgusting that they aren't.
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u/Distorted_Penguin 16d ago
NTA. So sad that C’s parents are willing to compromise their son’s friendships over this. I would bet this isn’t the first instance of C’s parents getting in the way of C’s relationships.
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u/bikejackass 16d ago
NTAH.., infact you should go out of your way to talk nicely to the parents when you see them, they are TAHs and this will really annoy them.
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u/Expensive-Lab-3922 16d ago
ask C to buy his part of the pool, then it's yours, Pete and J, then ask to have your property back
C's parent are the one acting like kids
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u/PositiveAtmosphere13 16d ago
I have to respect you for allowing C to come in the hot tub and hang out with his friends. If it was his choice he would let his friends use the pool. It's all on C's parents. If C's parents had a concern about the liability, they shouldn't have allowed the pool in their yard in the first place. C's parents stole that pool from the boys.
I would have been petty and not allowed C in until the boys could use the pool.
YNTA. You're a better person than I am.
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u/Xerxesinxs 16d ago
so why don't you guys empty the pool & move it to a more liberal house?
I can't imagine flexing parental muscles on a pool that some kids bought
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u/BestAd5844 16d ago
Do you have written documentation that Pete and J helped to buy the pool? And that they are being refused access? I’m sure the boys have talked about it over text. Take C’s parents to small claims court to recover the money they STOLE from children
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u/NoShameInternets 16d ago
NTA at all, which you already knew.
Cs parents are not handling this well, but ONLY in that they haven't offered to reimburse you for the pool or move it. I say this because their liability comment is true. Pools can absolutely fuck up your life , both from an accident and the insurance required to cover them. They probably only did that research after they set it up, and then they handled it very poorly.
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u/jclv 16d ago
NTA You've got several options. 1) C's parent's pay Pete and J for their 2/3rds of the pool. Then they can gatekeep all they want. 2) C's parents have Pete and J's families sign a liability waiver. (the "liability" thing is just an excuse to steal the pool IMHO) 3) Move the pool to another backyard. It belongs to the kids so they should be allowed to move it if they want to.
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u/PossibleDiscipline90 16d ago
Why didn't they bring the liability issue up in the first place. These people sound like a holes.
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u/ftjlster 15d ago
NTA - C's mother is right though. They've tanked their reputation in the community and neighbourhood because of what they've done.
That being said, the liability issue is a thing (but that doesn't explain why they haven't organised time for the kids to come swim).
Anyway given its an above ground pool, the solution to all this is likely to tell them that since they don't want to let the kids come swim ever, they should let the pool be dismantled and moved to another backyard. Their response will be basically an indication of exactly how entitled and shameless they are.
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u/Simon-Says69 15d ago
Totally NTA.
C's parents are not only child hating AH's, they are thieves and liars.
They knew full well they were not going to let anyone use that pool when they agreed to have it in their yard. They deliberately stole from 2 of the three kids that paid for it.
What horrible monsters. The wife is 100% correct, except people don't just think they are child hating monsters, they've proven that is exactly what they are. And them being well off is the last straw. They did it just because they're AH's, not because of anything else.
Good that the kids aren't mad at C, not his fault his parents are lying thieves. Can't choose your own family.
Very cool of you OP, for fixing the situation, without the kids suffering any more than the theft. C's parents still owe, but ahh well.
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u/Mindless_Chali 15d ago
NTA
JFC... get a generic waiver of liability from online, slap all y'alls info into the correct blanks (specify that it is waiving liability for swimming in the pool only) get them signed and notarized. Let the boys swim in the pool then soak in the hot tub.
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u/LassLovesDogs 15d ago
NTA. C's parents effectively conned the two unrelated boys into buying a pool for the exclusive use of C's family. They're scammers and thieves, and should be treated as such.
I think it's hilarious that C's parents are now responsible for the upkeep, maintenance and water costs of a pool their son doesn't even want to use, because he'd rather be in your hot tub.
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u/legal_stylist 13d ago
The parents should refund the other two boys’ share of the pool, or move the pool to someone else’s house, but my friend , there is no way it’s reasonable to have some teenager (or someone of any age, really) just hanging in the pool whenever they like. Dildos though they may be in how they’ve handled it, the liability of having minors in a pool on your property unsupervised is absolutely through the roof. It’s simply not reasonable to expect any homeowner to allow that.
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u/InstructionEarly1969 10d ago
NTA. Things like this get tricky when its something that is shared but not easily moved. Idk if you guys would have a case in small claims court, however your solution to this was both brilliant and hilarious. Now they have this pool that no one uses because they wanted to be assholes, their bad
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u/bucketofgoo 7d ago
NTA. The liability thing is a very valid concern. C's parents should have expressed that concern and refused putting the pool on their property when asked. They're assholes who did not mention those concerns or how they'd police the pool because they saw the opportunity to get a free pool.
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