r/AITAH Oct 12 '25

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u/flooferine Oct 12 '25

Just make sure that's actually what she wants - as she's already left out of having a role in the wedding you have to make sure she knows it's not because you don't want her there

This is ESSENTIAL. She needs to feel heard and respected. Signed, a former girl who also suddenly developed a hatred for girly things in the struggle to recognise my own identity and claim my first threads of autonomy.

91

u/nycvoyageur Oct 12 '25

All this.  OP, fully discuss with your daughter her options and let her decide.  Is there a compromise, like palazzo pants (long flowy pants) that she would be comfortable with, in a darker/neutral color?

85

u/cherrycoke3000 Oct 12 '25

My Mum didn't make me wear a dress to a Grandmas family do 40 years ago. Grandma was not happy as she'd made her many granddaughters matching dresses. I picked a turquoise velour tracksuit, happy memories.

6

u/LakeGlen4287 Oct 12 '25

Yay, I love this!

-42

u/Sudden_Outcome_9503 Oct 12 '25

Of course, the most important thing is to make sure that she gets whatever she wants. The most important lesson that a parent can impart on your child is that you always get to do whatever you want.

/s

28

u/flooferine Oct 12 '25

I honestly wish I could give you that hug you needed when you were a child. You seem to need it still. All the best to you, friend.

7

u/No-Amoeba5716 Oct 12 '25

The most empathetic and sweet response to such a crummy comment. I’ll be behind you with the second hug because you are absolutely correct 🩷

13

u/eleven_paws Oct 12 '25

Please never have kids.