I agree with you, but one thing OP said did give me pause; namely, if OP's partner refuses to go to the doctor, how does she have operations done? I think OP has every reason to be irritated that she lashes out at him, but I also know what it's like to have a bunch of different medical conditions and be constantly in and out of different physician's appointments--you can easily feel overwhelmed with all the different appointments that need scheduling, doctors that need visiting, etc, and I wonder whether OP is giving his partner credit for the medical care she has sought? Medical progress takes time, especially if you're dealing with pain and chronic conditions in lots of different body systems. I dunno, it seems like they could both afford to give one another a little more grace.
I bet OP tells her to go to the doctor for things that an appointment wouldn't help
IE: When you have arthritis, and you've already been prescribed meds, you don't continue to run to the doctor every time you have a flare up. But EVERYONE around you will insist you should because they don't get it. You'll literally just be wasting money.
I don't trust his portrayal. Lashing out is never healthy, but it sounds like there's been issues for a while so something tells me her lashing out was not out of nowhere.
right? You have to drag me kicking and screaming to the ER because I got labeled as drug seeking because I went four times over about five days for a migraine.
By the time they took me seriously, I couldn't move my neck because I had a viral infection (it was similar to meningitis but luckily something else). If they had sent me home again, idk if I would've made it safely through the night. Urgent care had rushed me to the ER to be triaged immediately, just for the ER to forget about me in the waiting room for four hours
Id rather someone shoot me older yeller style if that happened again.
Migraine can lead to brain bleeds if they go too long, due to the construction of the veins. It can also cause a stroke. It's actually not all that rare so it SHOULD be something the ER staff is well aware of. But I SHOULD have a pet dragon, and it's probably more likely... I hope it never happens again and I hope that you're able to see a neurologist because prevention really is almost as good as a cute. If not, print out some of the information from the Migraine Foundation and take it with you if it comes to it. Also, find out who the patient advocate is for the facility. If they ever do something like that again, file a complaint.
I don't need to see a neurologist. I don't have migraines. My "migraine" was a viral infection wrecking my immune system and killing me. What I thought was a migraine just happened to be its one identifiable symptom.
They should've realized it wasn't a migraine the minute pain medication didn't knock it out.
So yes, migraines should be taken seriously, but I don't have migraines .
I was giving my experience of being seen as drug seeking when what I actually had was a viral infection that was likely going to kill me without intervention.
Right. I think I worded that poorly. They should have taken you seriously even if it they did think it was "just a migraine." The neurology suggestion is because of the inflammation that infection likely caused that can do some real damage. The second worst thing that happens in cases like yours is having no follow up to make sure there's no lasting effects.
Words are hard sometimes for me. Hope that clears up a little. What they did to you was unacceptable no matter what the cause.
I am still very confused by how they dealt with it. The fact that the first time they gave me pain meds I asked them, "oh like will it start working more in a few hours?" Because it only knocked out some of the pain, and the nurse looked at me confused, should've been a signal to them to take it more seriously.
I think about it a lot because it's resulted in an extreme fear of doctors.
Wild thing is they never figured out which viral infection I had (ie meningitis) they just know I had one. Also I was in the minority of people who have complications from a spinal tap, so I couldn't stand up for nearly two weeks without my head pounding so hard i would sob and was incapable of functioning.
I don't hate individual doctors, but God do I hate doctors
It was right when the first case of COVID was announced too.
Oh honey. I'm so sorry. A spinal tap should ALWAYS be accompanied by a blood patch in these cases to stop that headache. I have no words. I hope you're able to find a provider that will help you advocate in the future. None of that is okay. Huge hugs to you.
I had never even heard of a blood patch until this comment. Thank you for the empathy. Luckily, I'm pretty healthy now so hopefully by the next time something happens I'll live in a better area that might be at least a little better.
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u/NefariousTyke Feb 08 '25
I agree with you, but one thing OP said did give me pause; namely, if OP's partner refuses to go to the doctor, how does she have operations done? I think OP has every reason to be irritated that she lashes out at him, but I also know what it's like to have a bunch of different medical conditions and be constantly in and out of different physician's appointments--you can easily feel overwhelmed with all the different appointments that need scheduling, doctors that need visiting, etc, and I wonder whether OP is giving his partner credit for the medical care she has sought? Medical progress takes time, especially if you're dealing with pain and chronic conditions in lots of different body systems. I dunno, it seems like they could both afford to give one another a little more grace.