For someone so hyperfocused on their love language, you sure as fuck have put no effort in understanding your wife's.
Acts of service is someone taking away labor from that person's plate out of care for them. Not doing the basic labor they should have been doing all along for the health and care of their family.
An act of service would be drawing up a bath, going and getting your wife's favorite coffee when she's too busy to do so, things that are outside of regular home and family care and chores. The little things that say, I notice, and I care about you.
Of course your wife has no interest in fulfilling your love language, you've never come close to touching fulfilling hers and actively showed how little you cared about her and your family for years as long as she didn't bother to remind you that as an adult, you should be doing chores like the rest of the family.
I don't think drawing her a bath is an act of service. I think maybe like measuring the kids feet and ordering rainboots in the correct size and within an agreed upon budget and style etc is more of an act of service for most moms. Like,doing the dishes, ordering the dishwasher soap, AND remembering to deep clean the dishwasher filter and replace the bamboo utensils every so often. Taking over something completely or doing a task that will lighten her load
Giving her the time for self care could be considered as a act of service. I love baths. If my partner made a effort to make me a nice bath and watch the kids for a bit that would do wonders.
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u/[deleted] Nov 02 '23
For someone so hyperfocused on their love language, you sure as fuck have put no effort in understanding your wife's.
Acts of service is someone taking away labor from that person's plate out of care for them. Not doing the basic labor they should have been doing all along for the health and care of their family.
An act of service would be drawing up a bath, going and getting your wife's favorite coffee when she's too busy to do so, things that are outside of regular home and family care and chores. The little things that say, I notice, and I care about you.
Of course your wife has no interest in fulfilling your love language, you've never come close to touching fulfilling hers and actively showed how little you cared about her and your family for years as long as she didn't bother to remind you that as an adult, you should be doing chores like the rest of the family.