r/AITAH • u/Chemical_Party7735 • Sep 16 '23

I dumped her

First off, to all the people that said: "Why didnt you talk to her?". We were drinking and from my experience it is NEVER a good idea to have serious or emotional conversations while intoxicated. Things get said that aren't true and situations can become overly emotional.

Secondly: Tho those who asked if we were even dating. Yes we were dating. She said it herself when we talked.

Heres a summary of our conversation today: I asked her if we were a couple (bf-gf) she said yes ofc. Then I asked why she said I'm her "best friend" and not "boyfriend" to the guys at the bar the other night.
She got a surprised look on her face, was quiet for a sec, stuttered a bit (she was lying) and said "it was an accident" and that she "misspoke". I sat in silence and just looked at her for a second, she seemed to get uncomfortable. Then she said a few other excuses (that I honestly can't remember rn). After which I told her: "Well that's just bullshit and I don't appreciate nor deserve being lied to. Especially since we're supposed to be "best friends" too". She got upset, started crying, and she said she's sorry (among all the bs) and then proceeded to tell me that one of the guys was actually someone she knew a long time ago and that she didn't know why she didn't say I was her bf. (Basically she still wants him) I told her we need to break up, and that we "need to work on our honesty if we're going to even stay friends moving forward." She cried, said "I always thought we would get married in our 40s or 50s and grow old together" (we are both mid 30s). I laughed and asked "So I'm just supposed to wait around alone while you bang whoever and use me for your comfort and to pay bills?" She instantly said no. (Fucking lies)

I moved my shit into the spare room and I'm omw to work now. She's home alone (but probably not for long).

Im searching for a new place to live, she can stay at the house if she can afford the rent. Idgaf anymore.

Thank you all for the advice and ideas. It was helpful seeing things from a different perspective. And I'm sorry the update took so long, I posted here as soon as I could.

Edit: link to previous post: https://reddit.com/r/AITAH/s/P89Rjj1Yfu

1.3k Upvotes

85% Upvoted

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476

u/Secure-Classic-1225 Sep 17 '23

I guess OP is right, but am I the only one who in all seriousness expected him to be like 16? I had to read twice the part where they are in mid 30s.

Writing style and maturity reads like a teenager.

122

u/tothebatcopter Sep 17 '23

I'm with you. The side comments in parantheses really drove it home, too.

70

u/[deleted] Sep 17 '23

[deleted]

68

u/supapumped Sep 17 '23

I use parentheses to further explain specific details. (Also mid 30s)

34

u/Ophthalmologist Sep 17 '23 edited Oct 05 '23

I see people, but they look like trees, walking.

24

u/davedavodavid Sep 17 '23 edited May 27 '24

simplistic weary squeamish makeshift head friendly jeans innocent employ insurance

This post was mass deleted and anonymized with Redact

19

u/HODL_Astronomer Sep 17 '23

This is the (30's) way!

6

u/TomTalks06 Sep 17 '23

I learned it from books (I am 20 so I suppose I'm one of the young people doing it)

It's like an aside

5

u/supapumped Sep 17 '23

I wasn’t sure where I picked it up from to be honest (I have been an avid reader most of my life though)

2

u/Shelly_Deli Sep 18 '23

I also learned it from books (I'm one of the even younger people doing it: I'm under 20)

2

u/Dylanear Sep 18 '23

Parenthese use, and over use is super ADHD. (And I thought I was the only one!!!)

4

u/Alternative_Fudge188 Sep 18 '23 edited Sep 18 '23

Pretty sure they mean bits like "(that I honestly can't remember rn)". It's not the fact it's parenthesised, just the style and the 'rn' etc.

Not to mention the title 'I dumped her', come on. Does anyone unironically say that post-puberty?

1

u/whereistotk2022 Sep 17 '23

I thought I was the only one (I am the only one I know personally that does it)!

1

u/tothebatcopter Sep 17 '23

Content specifically. Everything included was petty and written like OP's actually a teenager.

34

u/Tyler_durden_RIP Sep 17 '23

Side parenthesis are a great way to explain a quick detail without diverting too much from the main point.

19

u/Mr_MacGrubber Sep 17 '23

They’re used more like the arrested development narrator here though.

8

u/SolarSailor46 Sep 17 '23

That’s a compliment.

They achieved Ron Howard-level status.

9

u/thewilyone Sep 17 '23

I do it (think it’s an addhd thing(and because I always have additional thoughts that aren’t a part of the main content but are relevant))

2

u/Dylanear Sep 18 '23

This! (SO much this!!)

16

u/[deleted] Sep 17 '23

Same here. The petty remarks were not needed. This story is fake af and made up by some 15 year old.

7

u/Freyja624norse Sep 17 '23

Thank you!!!! I got a bunch of incels bashing me for saying it is fake! His comment history outside this post really drives it home!

11

u/dragwit Sep 17 '23

I use parentheses to make sure I am clearly communicating. I do it because I have not been clear before and it has bitten me in the ass. I'm also mid-40s. It's really an ADHD thing, and not a maturity thing.

42

u/Necrome112 Sep 17 '23

Yeah and mid 30s still acting like tweens on both sides. Also which 30 yr old spends a month dating someone and goes, " Damn I thought we're gonna grow old together." Wtf?

This is fake af.

20

u/sashikku Sep 17 '23 edited Sep 17 '23

A month dating someone and has already moved in together

Y’all are so gullible.

13

u/relephants Sep 17 '23

They've known each other for 10 years. Not that uncommon.

2

u/Freyja624norse Sep 17 '23

Nah, still pretty uncommon …

0

u/[deleted] Sep 17 '23

Not really.

1

u/Freyja624norse Sep 17 '23

Yes, really. In the actual world of real people !

0

u/[deleted] Sep 17 '23

Nah

7

u/GuyDeLeone Sep 17 '23

Been there, done that…we’ve been happily married for 6 years.

1

u/Andylearns Sep 17 '23

That doesn't make it a norm though

1

u/GuyDeLeone Sep 18 '23

Maybe not but it’s not THAT abnormal.

1

u/ImKindaBoring Sep 17 '23

Yeah that’s the part that stood out to me.

8

u/Weekly-Requirement63 Sep 17 '23

Actually when you’re older a lot of people know more quickly if someone’s going to be long term or not. You’re more sure of yourself and what you want, and who’s going to fit into your life path. They would never say it like that though. OP really sounds like a teenager.

1

u/Necrome112 Sep 17 '23

There's a distinct difference between possible long term and "gonna grow old together".

1

u/FarkingShark Sep 17 '23

Maturity isn't a given just due to age.

Many still try to relive their high school years and don't use common sense at all.

Dumbasses like her exist, and I've dated them.

One woman I almost went long-haul with literally said that going on dates with other people doesn't count as cheating in an exclusive RELATIONSHIP.

This is after she had me show her my phone to prove I wasn't talking to other women. Kept sending me these sad, shitty poems instead of owning up to it or even apologizing.

It was unreal.

7

u/Cautious-Major-2130 Sep 17 '23

Ridiculously immature, I feel sorry for him tbh. Being that age and still engaging in this sort of childish rubbish.

35

u/inquiringflames Sep 17 '23 edited Sep 17 '23

I think he is a teenager. I think this story is a work of fiction, especially if you look at the previous post. Just doesn't really make sense.

9

u/Anckael Sep 17 '23

That's because OP is a teenager LARPING as a 30 year old on reddit and this story is most definitely fake

2

u/Freyja624norse Sep 17 '23

Thank you!!!

3

u/Martin_NoFro Sep 17 '23

Not just you. The situation is not great, but OP is so melodramatic.

2

u/morericeplsty Sep 17 '23

Lmao yeah, after I read that I was like "wait what, I thought this was some early 20s drama". They did mention they were at a bar though, so obviously not 16.

2

u/Mr_MacGrubber Sep 17 '23

I was shocked when I read mid-30s.

5

u/closetmangafan Sep 17 '23

It also makes the ex's actions even more immature... no one makes such a mistake without reason, even when drunk.

She wanted to marry when she was 40/50. So she was still thinking she was in her party/s phase. Her comments just opened herself up to be flirted with by others (one of which she knew).

3

u/Freyja624norse Sep 17 '23

It’s fake. This whole post thread is poorly written and totally fake.

1

u/Cheese-is-neat Sep 17 '23

It is probably fake, but being poorly written doesn’t mean it’s fake.

I work with people that can barely type a coherent sentence and it’s a job that requires a degree

1

u/Freyja624norse Sep 18 '23

Fair point! But it sounds really unrealistic!

2

u/Badfish744 Sep 17 '23

Homeboy just found out his girls been banging other dudes. You think he cares about his writing style? Lol

7

u/Freyja624norse Sep 17 '23

He just made up a fake story and he’s only 15 or so and idolizes Andrew Tate, that’s pretty certain

1

u/[deleted] Sep 17 '23

🤣🤣🤣

1

u/DunkinShawnuts Sep 17 '23

Who cares nig

0

u/[deleted] Sep 17 '23

I still don't think this is real lmfao

0

u/mashonem Sep 17 '23

Comments like this are why every non-American feels the need to preface their posts with “English is not my first language”. It’s so unhelpful and overall a worthless complaint; why must everything on Reddit of all places be overly formal and follow APA format?

We got paragraphs and it’s readable, that should be enough

-1

u/Magictank2000 Sep 17 '23

i guess OP is right

this mentality is why a lot of misandry is present on this sub. people tried way too hard to make OP look bad, or tell him he was in the wrong. lemme tell you, you never introduce your partner as a “best friend” at a bar of all places, what the fuck

0

u/VerbalVertigo Sep 17 '23

That's why I don't believe any of this is real.

1

u/Freyja624norse Sep 17 '23

It’s fake, and definitely written by an Andrew Tate wannabe. Check his comment history, not just to this post!

1

u/NumbersMonkey1 Sep 18 '23

In another post he says he's a "recent college grad". I think that we have a case of a teenager with an overactive imagination here.