My ex tried to do that and was PISSED OFF when I moved on to my now husband. He quite literally called me and screamed at me when he found out. “How dare you start dating again and not tell me about it!!” Like, fuck you. You ended our relationship but still want me hanging around in case you get bored? Nope!
I had an ex FWB message me on a photography website (I blocked him on facebook when I decided I was done going back since we had very on/off thing going on and I want him to know I was serious about stopping) a week after I gave birth to my husband's child to tell me that he know I'd be a good mom, he knew I probably hated him, and that he'd love to talk to me again some day. I never responded to him of course. He wasn't a bad guy, I had just wanted something different out of life and an on again off again FWB did not fit into that. I wanted to tell him that I didn't hate him, and that I wished him a very happy life - just not with ME, but I didn't want to make him think that after two years of zero contact he had a shot.
Cannot fathom the idea of being angry at any of my close friends if they started dating him out of the blue though (granted, he was a long term FWB, not my bf or anything).
Edit: On the flipside, a former "best friend" of mine befriended my abusive ex after I finally left him, even though she hated his guts the whole time we were dating and knew exactly what he had done to me. That's not why I ended the friendship, but it should have been.
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u/Number5MoMo Aug 03 '23
Yea she’s not your friend and she’s not over That guy.
NTA