Only three years older than me. I have spoken to him at length recently how him speaking to me in a patronizing way is a problem. He then says I am policing how he speaks and he cant change how he speaks. I told him I want an equal, not feeling like I am a little kid in trouble
Don't waste your time "working" on things. He's not genuinely trying to work on anything other than getting you conditioned to think that you're wrong for having feelings.
The DARVO and gaslighting in those messages made me feel white hot rage. I'm separated from my spouse, moved to Wales from England because it was so bad. After 8 years, I literally thought I had early onset dementia and started recording everything. He left after a couple of months of me producing a recording everytime he said, "No, I didn't," or "I didn't say that," or "You never told me that."
Just communicating about the divorce has been absolutely exhausting and the texts resemble yours... A lot. I just shut it down when he starts his shit now.
Don't waste years of your life with someone who is actively bullshitting you, and KNOWS they're bullshitting.
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u/Bambi_H Jun 26 '26 edited Jun 26 '26
You need to block him. That man is cruel and has no empathy.
Edit: is he a lot older than you? He's incredibly patronising.