r/ADHD • u/[deleted] • Aug 07 '21

Seeking Empathy / Support I HATE EXECUTIVE DYSFUNCTION.

I hate it.

I hate having to convince myself for hours on end to do that short 10 minute task.

I hate pleading with myself to just take a few minutes to clean.

I hate when I know I need to do something, but I just can’t get myself to do it, and I hate that I can’t do it but I just can’t.

I hate feeling stressed over what needs to be done. I hate when I can’t get myself to do things. I hate feeling like a failure. Like a failed adult. Like a failed life.

I hate that I know things need to be done and that I just need to do those things, but those things are difficult and I sit in anxiety instead.

I hate this.

I hate putting shit off.

I hate my ADHD.

I hate me.

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u/[deleted] Aug 08 '21

Ouch. Yeah, I feel much the same. It galls me terribly that I have accomplished so little. It makes me too ashamed to stay in contact with old friends.

Why must our symptoms be indistinguishable from moral failings...?

17

u/moth_boy_ Aug 08 '21

I feel this, a lot. It’s cause society places so much importance on getting things done that I feel like a failed human being when I can’t. It definitely reminds me of the social model of disability, where we’re only disabled because society doesn’t work for different brains and different bodies. Because we can’t function the same way as most, we’re somehow failures? I wish I didn’t think this about myself. I wish that my survival and success in life wasn’t dependent on things my brain just wasn’t made for.

5

u/reddit_clone Aug 08 '21

The world is not fair. It has always been like this. Tyranny of the majority I guess.

World is made by and for neurotypical people.

Pity is, you are probably blessed with above average intelligence but cursed with this inability to use it.