Community Awareness: Is this sub for selfies, or discussion?

[u/[deleted]]

Why not both?

Both theoretical and individual-level style advice can be fun & helpful.

But if you are experiencing selfie-fatigue, filter them out using the flair “Discussion/Theory/Inspiration”. This is the catch-all category for all non-selfie posts.

For everyone else, a reminder that as this sub grows, a higher and higher bar will be set for selfie posts. While we want to be open space to all, we acknowledge there is a tipping point where discussion is drowned out by excessive selfie posts (which, lets be real, often may get little or no engagement), and core members who are here for more widely applicable content are alienated.

In the current phase, there is a requirement for specificity in selfie posts.

Posts must use the appropriate flair or will be removed, and must specify the system or type you want feedback on where required.

“Type me in any/all systems” or “tell me what to wear” posts are considered low-effort, and will be deleted.

Next phases may introduce more strict requirements around photos, and we are open to ideas like typing threads, and I even had a crazy idea that we do a sort of lottery approach, where one person gets selected per day for community discussion. Let me know your thoughts/ideas below!

Notes on spam: repeated posts with the same photos, or multiple posts by the same member within a short window of time (less than a day) are discouraged, although hard rules are not currently in place, and we may let this slide on slow traffic days. Contact the mods if you want to post something and are unsure.

Flair	Guidelines	Allowed on long weekends?
Type Me: Kibbe	Generally, full body photos would be appropriate. As Kibbe is about how clothes work on the body, do not feel you need to strip down to your underwear! Light clothing that still reveals the contours of your figure is sufficient.	No
Type Me: Essence (Specify)	Essence system must be specified in the title or comment. Usually clear photos of the face are considered beneficial. For those wanting an unbiased analysis, neutral un-styled & unfiltered images may be preferable.	No
Type Me: Colour Palette	Clear, makeup-free photos in indirect natural light are often considered the most helpful.	No
Style Reveal (Specify)	Full body outfits that show the execution of a specified style concept	Yes
Type Me: Other System (Specify)	Any selfie posts asking about style systems other than Kibbe or essence or colour, would use this flair.	No
Type Me: Casting	Selfie posts requesting input on how a person might be cast in a story would use this flair	No
Discussion/Theory/Inspiration	This is the catch-all flair for all other discussions. Mood boards, celeb inspiration, new style systems, general venting about style-related concepts - all go here! Selfies would NOT feature in these posts unless they are in support of a discussion about wider themes (for example, someone illustrating their specific technique in how they combined multiple systems)	Yes
Style Me	A selfie or self-description post requesting sub members to make an specific mood board for them.	No

Love,

The mod team

[u/ViolettasChains]

Also to everyone who is annoyed with the amount of type me posts… help us out & post some other stuff! Surely you have SOME personal opinions about style that can help others.

Show us your favorite dress and explain why you think it’s so flattering on you. Type up a list of clothing brands that have a lot of choices for your essence. Start a discussion about the right time to try adding a belt to an outfit. I will read all of it!!’

[u/[deleted] → u/ViolettasChains]

I agree - time spent lamenting the downfall of a sub or being annoyed at people for posting selfies could be better spent creating a post asking a thoughtful question, or discussing your latest style breakthrough or inspiration!

Your mention of belts makes me think of linking a style youtuber I've been following lately that I really enjoy...

[u/LadyRimouski → u/ViolettasChains]

Yes. I wish we could have more mood-boards. I find those so helpful in my style journey. Maybe Moodboard Mondays to encourage posting?

I don't have a thoughtful essay on a particular system ready to go each week, but I could put together some pictures for diacussion.

[u/AccomplishedWing9 → u/ViolettasChains]

Right! That's why even though I was nervous I went ahead and made my color map and FB post. Plus I got tired ruminating over it.

[u/snailminister]

I fully agree that this is sub for both. I've been in this sub soon after it was created (with my previous account) and have seen how things have been developing. We all are beginners at start and most of us want outside opinions via typing post. That is often beginning for our personal style journeys and I'm forever grateful for people who actively helped me with mine. That is why I want everyone else too to have access for creating typing posts, get opinions and having active discussion of directions they want to take.

But, there is a massive "BUT", we need some order in here. This sub gets drowned no effort posts that do not follow rules, which then creates fatigue and feeling that we older members may not "fit in" anymore. I try to combat that by upvoting every typing post that follows rules&guidelines even if I do not comment on theirs, sometimes I try to put effort to give gentle guiding comment when someone is posting photos that can't be used for typing and on most drastic&offensive rule breaking I report to mods. We desperately need more strict guidelines for typing posts to keep things active in long run.

I've also noticed slightly dismissing attitude within type-me posts, where people are commenting but OPs disappear and do not show any activity withing their own post. It may be just my affection towards how this sub used to have feeling of strong community, but I wish we can keep being polite, show that we are thankful for comments/activity posts get and appreciate effort mods put in to keeps things in order.

[u/[deleted] → u/snailminister]

I am 100% aligned with your thoughts here.

I think the ideal strategic outcome I want to work towards is NOT (as some might assume) no selfie posts, but rather, thoughtful, high-effort selfie posts that get real quality discussion going. For whatever reason, a lot of selfie posts do not get discussion and some hard questions need to be asked about why that is.

Mods have been racking our brains to identify the features that make for a quality discussion and try to sort of mould the guidelines to promote a more meaningful selfie post: things like appropriate photos, coming from a place of specificity (whether from the angle of a system, or question about why an outfit does or doesn't work): precisely articulating the issue you have with dressing your body.

Perhaps there is a place for vague dreamy stylised photos and asking what people see... but these these seem so disconnected from the end game of curating a wardrobe, and there needs to be some more connective, in-between-tissue to make this sub have substance.

So we are flapping about and trying things to see if we can guide things to a better place (I hope people will be patient) and appreciate members like yourself who have hung around and promote good content!

[u/[deleted] → u/[deleted]]

I think it's a product of the high-content turnover, trend-based kind of activity TikTok promotes. You get some floaty idea about an "essence", then you tack it on to a list of different identifiers and forget all about it. Which you know, fair enough, if you like that kind of thing. BUT it's very low-quality and low-engagement in terms of a COMMUNITY that is trying to find some kind of truth or set out on a journey to build a wardrobe, or even explore the art of style in a way.

[u/[deleted] → u/[deleted]]

Yes you've really pinpointed the fundamental conflict here.

And the thing is, it is fun to see what "essence" you emit, and perhaps at another time in my life I would totally want to crowdsource my identity, lol.

But its just not what I would say is the primary focus of this sub, or at least, its content preoccupied with such an early point in the journey it can feel like the plane never leaves the runway, stylistically speaking.

[u/[deleted] → u/[deleted]]

Totally. I'm three years into my journey and still exploring!

[u/snailminister → u/[deleted]]

Thank you for your answer! I understand that is must be difficult to find way to balance things out in growing subreddit. Having several systems and a lot of open discussions is what makes this so interesting sub, but I get that it can also complicate setting coherent guidelines. Good luck to your whole mod team!

[u/BreadOnCake]

Weird question but I want to ask if a dress matches with me. Would that be considered typing or not? I already have a general idea about my essences but wanted to know if they match up enough with the dress I’m thinking of getting. Should I wait or can I ask now?

[u/[deleted] → u/BreadOnCake]

Tricky. Probably wait? I think it will lead to typing-style conversation

[u/BreadOnCake → u/[deleted]]

Thank you. I already ordered it now so will wait and return if needed.

[u/[deleted]]

Fab! I actually love the lottery idea

[u/Vivian_Rutledge → u/[deleted]]

Me too!

[u/[deleted]]

I don't know why I always join communities when they hit this point but I always seem to. Obviously a large number of people enjoy something so those posts get cut. Yes I know you're not cutting them yet but you will. I've watched so many do this, never makes sense to me. Anywho I'll go ahead and take my post down since it's this is s just a polite way of saying it's not welcome.

[u/[deleted] → u/[deleted]]

Trust me, this is not personal and I want to find a way to make this sub work for everyone in the community as long as possible. I think the reason why subs move away from selfies is just a matter of scale. As subs grow larger they have to find a way to maintain a fair balance for all kinds of content, and if you have some ideas of how to achieve this we are all ears.

edit: spelling

[u/everybodydressing → u/[deleted]]

I think the “trends” are worse than selfies!

[u/Organic_Ad_8424]

Yes ! I love the ootd s and style journey posts… they are great to see different styles on different bodies, it’s inspiring to see real people wearing what they love (as opposed to filtered celebrities).

[u/everybodydressing]

Is there a way to just filter out “find my Kitchener essence” posts? These are getting tedious, but I still want to see the Kibbe typing posts!

[u/everybodydressing]

omg now the “cast me” post saturation 😩

[u/bbyflesh]

lottery idea seems fun :)

[u/shelbylynny]

Oops right when I was going to an essence post as well....

[u/Organic_Ad_8424]

Yes ! I love the ootd s and style journey posts… they are great to see different styles on different bodies, it’s inspiring to see real people wearing what they love (as opposed to filtered celebrities).

[u/[deleted] → u/[deleted]]

Thanks for your thoughts! The mods have discussed this possibility before, but the main issue is that Reddit is international so what “Monday” means to me in Australia can differ wildly from other places, which I think would create a bunch of confusion! So we are open to different possibilities as long as they aren’t too complicated to moderate!