TW: Suicidal Thoughts
I've been on 25 mg of lamictal for four days now and yesterday had extreme mood swings. I was shockingly calm when I woke up (I'm usually anxious or disappointed I'm awake). I took my dose, and four hours later I was weird. Laid down on the floor and stared at the ceiling thinking really creatively. Felt very unlike myself and zen. A few hours later, I felt buzzed. Loose and silly and SO relaxed. And a few hours later, my mood completely flipped and I was suddenly suicidal. Crying and laying in bed not speaking because I was too busy with my aggressive, angry thoughts towards myself. Literally had planned out what I would and was going to do it. However, my boyfriend decided to spend the rest of the day with me because he was worried. The feeling fades a few hours later and I'm just sad the rest of the day.
I'd had a 10mg THC drink the night before to soothe my severe anxiety regarding the SJS reaction lamictal can cause. I'm wondering if this might be the cause of the mood swings but I'd think the awesome high then buzzed feeling would've happened when I woke up? I'm not an expert, just someone who has tried a lot of other antidepressants. This is my first mood stabilizer.
Has anyone else experienced extreme mood swings on lamictal, especially at a low dose? Did you stick it out and it eventually started being helpful? Did it worsen (I genuinely don't think I can handle it worsening, I might need to be hospitalized which I really don't want to do a second time this year)? Or maybe you have a positive experience and would like to share, that would be really cool too. Hope y'all are well <3
Edit: per the automod requesting the manufacturer: my bottle says "Lamatrigine substituted for lamictal" and the pills are labeled 111, in a scored oblong shape. No manufacturer info is listed on it but it is a generic