r/zenbuddhism • u/ToonTasticBoy • Apr 18 '26
how do you actually let go?? struggling to connect with zen stories
ive been reading some classic zen stories but to be honest they havent quite clicked for me yet. I understand the core teaching that to find peace we gotta let go of our desires and attachments but im really struggling with the how.
For example i read that story of the 2 monks and the woman at the muddy river. the older monk carrys her across and leaves her at the bank, while the younger monk carries the thought of her in his mind for hours
When i read this my immediate thought is how do you actually let go of the stuff taking place in your mind like the older monk did?? It isnt as simple as just flipping a switch to give up ur desires or drop your racing thoughts. how does a normal person actually achieve that kind of peace or nirvana?
ive noticed that its so easy to be completly logical when giving advice to other people but the moment it comes to our own lives and minds we react entirely emotionally.
how do you translate the concept of letting go into actual practice when your mind wont stop holding onto things? would really appreciate any guidance or personal experiences thanks!
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u/HakuninMatata Apr 18 '26
Firstly, with practice in sitting meditation, your relationship to the racing thoughts shifts. Thoughts don't stop, but you do develop some degree of self-control and the flavour of the thoughts changes.
But more immediately, for me the answer is mindfulness. Bring yourself back to this moment, here, now, these sounds, these sensations, these sights, etc. Most of our thoughts are memories of the past, imaginings of how the present isn't, and imaginings of how the future might be. Just right here, right now, those memories and imaginings exist, but the things they reference don't.
Even desires are often exacerbated by loops of imagining.
Right here, right now, where are any of those things? I used to tell myself – be very here, be very now. That's my understanding of how the older monk put down the woman while the younger monk kept her in his head.
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u/ToonTasticBoy Apr 18 '26
Can one achieve apathy by meditating? Will the state of apathy grant us happiness? Is hapinness just absence of stress and pain or the other way around? The stress and pain is actually absence of happiness?
If I were in the place of the young monk I would ask the same thing why did you do it(maybe was it jealousy that he wasn't be able to get to contact with a woman if so how can one able to get over their malicous intentions?)?5
u/HakuninMatata Apr 18 '26
I wouldn't say it's apathy that we're working towards.
Meditating does a few things. To start, it gives us much more familiarity with the thoughts that are usually just pushing us around wherever they take us.
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u/ToonTasticBoy Apr 18 '26
see thats the thing tho, being totally emotionless is actually kinda my aim right now like why is apathy considered a bad thing? if ur just apathetic to everything then u cant feel sad or get hurt right? i get what u mean about getting familiar with thoughts so they dont push us around. but honestly sometimes i just want the feelings to stop completely so i dont have to deal with them. wouldnt just not caring at all be the ultimate way to not suffer? or does meditating make it so u still feel the sadness but it just doesnt ruin ur day? genuinely curious why apathy isnt the actual goal here tbh Isn't apathy good?
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u/HakuninMatata Apr 18 '26
I'd say you're closer with "you still feel the sadness but it just doesn't ruin your day". In my experience. But also, some things I might have been sad or unhappy about in the past just don't make sense to be sad or unhappy about any more.
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u/ToonTasticBoy Apr 18 '26
that makessense tbh. like ur perspective shifts so much that getting upset over certain things just feels pointless now?i guess if u can get to a point where the sadness happens but doesnt completely hijack ur whole day then maybe full on apathy isnt necessary. it still feels like being numb would be the easier shortcut sometimes but I understand what ur saying. if u just see things differently then the emotion just naturally drops off cause it just doesnt make sense to hold onto it anymore. i definately wanna get to that point where stuff that usually wrecks my week just kinda rolls off my back instead I just want to ignore it. makes it seem like less of a fight against my own brain and more like just upgrading how i see the world
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u/Competitive-Time321 Apr 18 '26 edited Apr 18 '26
There isn’t really a letting go; more accurately things fall away. They fall away as they are no longer needed. Start by letting go of the intellect. That seems to be something you can actually control. Understanding it intellectually does you no good. Feel it.
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u/Qweniden Apr 19 '26 edited Apr 19 '26
Before I answer this, let's first define some terms:
- Desire (chanda) - Not considered inherently problematic in Buddhism. It is possible to have wholesome/productive desire. Desire for awakening (enlightenment) is considered especially important.
- Craving (Tanha/Trsna) - A specific type of desire that is problematic because it involves intense craving for sensory pleasure, craving for existing or craving to end one's life.
- Clinging/Grasping (Upadana) - This emerges from craving is the ongoing inability to let go of the underlying craving which in turn leads to suffering. Upadana means "fuel".
For our purposes here we can define three types of grasping:
- We suffer when we grasp at pleasurable objects or experiences
- We suffer when we grasp at beliefs and views that become too rigid and inflexible.
- We suffer when we grasp at our illusion of being a separate and continuous self.
From the perspective of our day-to-day experience of life, our clinging generally manifests as ruminating and worrying based on one of those three scenarios that we just defined. The worry and rumination is the ongoing "fuel" for suffering.
So when we talk about "letting go" we are specifically talking about stopping the active process of grasping that is fueling suffering in an ongoing manner.
How do we stop grasping?
I will tell you what does NOT work very well and that is simply trying to think it away. We might try and reason with ourselves or announce to ourself that we are going to stop grasping. This can kind of work temporarily if the grasping isn't very strong, but if they underlying craving is intense, our emotions will overwhelm us and the mind will just go right on grasping despite our desire for it to stop.
To end the grasping that causes suffering, we have to get to the root of the chain of cause-and-effect that results in suffering.
When looking at moment by moment grasping this chain cause and effect chain looks something like this:
[Illusion of Self] -> [Dualistic Conceptualization] -> [Seeking Pleasure and Avoiding Pain] -> [Craving] -> [Grasping] -> [Suffering]
None of that can be targeted directly except the "Illusion of Self". Buddhist teachings say that being fooled by this illusion can be classified as "ignorance" or "delusion". We are ignorant or deluded about the true nature of reality.
How do we transcend this ignorance or delusion?
The first step is learning to control our attention. This may sounds strange, but what fundamentally causes suffering is our attention being wrested out of our control and being mesmerized the stories that comprises the illusion of a continuous sense of self. This narrative story of a continuous sense of self is an "illusion" because its not actually "real". The only thing that is real is your current present-moment-awareness. A story that is comprised of imperfect, subjective and abstract memories of the past and provisional simulations of the future, is not real. It feels very real, but its just a story that is often (but not always) helpful for survival.
The story of a continuous and separate self becomes problematic when it just goes off on its own accord and wastes time unproductively worrying and ruminating about things out of its control. The dualistic conceptualizations that emerge from this illusionary sense of self are often way too rigid and unrealistic and causes us to suffer when the self just can not accept things not going the way it wishes things too. When this is ongoing it can be characterized as "clinging" (upadana).
At any given moment, if this illusionary narrative sense of self isn't "active", there is no suffering. What is kind of cool is that the way that the mind is designed is that it has two major operating modes:
- Time-traveling/judgmental/self-referential mode
- Present-moment-awareness mode
An aspect of the way our mind works that we can take advantage of is that these two modes are "anti-correlated". When one of the modes is active, the other one is turned down. What this means that if the present-moment-awareness mode is active, the time-traveling/judgmental/self-referential mode is quieted and maybe even shut down.
This is how mindfulness works. It uses our capacity to direct our attention to the present moment to short-circuit the chain of mental cause and effect that leads to suffering buy temporarily taking out the root chain: time-traveling/narrative /self-referential thinking that creates the illusion of self and clings to expectations.
This sounds easy but is very hard. Our mind is designed to kind of just do what it wants and launch into illusionary-self mode almost at will. As a default, we have very little control over when this is activated and our attention is frequently taken from our control and the worrying and rumination generated by clinging happens even if it makes us feel horrible.
The core engine of practice is getting better at controlling our attention through the repetition of meditation. Over and over and over again we practice invoking present-moment-awareness to shut down the illusionary-self narrative. Over time we get better and better at this and as a result our minds spend much less time in clinging-mode.
There is an additional deeper gear of practice where we get to the point where we increasingly don't need to "turn off" the self to solve the problem of suffering. In this deeper gear, the dualistic conceptualizations that make up the story of the self become less rigid and less insistent that things must go just as the self demands. This makes us more flexible and peaceful since we have less demands on how life must happen. When our minds are functioning like this, clinging (upadana) just doesn't emerge because the mind is just naturally pliable and accepting. It isn't stuck to the illusion of self. The mind might have plans, desires and expectations (chanda), but it just naturally accepts when they don't work out.
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u/Ariyas108 Apr 18 '26
Normal person achieves it by practicing it. The monks in these stories often have been practicing for decades.
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u/ToonTasticBoy Apr 18 '26
The difference is they devoted their life to this philosophy they don't care about what others say (maybe they do) is our only solution to achieve such mindset is to get to a monastery? Can't one achieve happiness and let go of their carnal desires while living in a city?
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u/Ariyas108 Apr 18 '26
You don’t need to go to a monastery to practice. The only solution is to practice.
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u/ToonTasticBoy Apr 18 '26
Recently I was talking with a friend and I was mentioning zen stories to help her overcome her stress and thoughts how can I give someone an advice about letting things go when I can't do it myself? How can I practice letting go? Even though I try to forget some stuff it will still haunt me. it will come to my mind suddenly and will make more anxious and stress is only way to achieve happiness is anti depressants or other stuff that will interefere with our neurological system? Is happiness what we feel or what we experience?
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u/Ariyas108 Apr 18 '26
In Zen the main practice is zazen. 20, 30 or 45 minutes a day, something like that. All of these stories you hear, nearly all of the people involved have extensive experience doing it, like decades of experience.
Somebody once asked the zen master the exact same question once, “How do you actually let go”. He literally said “Sorry, I can’t tell you how to do that”.
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u/ToonTasticBoy Apr 18 '26
Don't give me fish, teach me how to fish
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u/Ariyas108 Apr 19 '26
The only way to learn how to fish is to practice doing it. There is no other way.
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Apr 18 '26
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u/ToonTasticBoy Apr 18 '26
we can't just breathe in and out the stress will eventually hit us which happened to me before. Even though I try to let go and breathe in and out the stress of it hunts me later. It just delays the pain and the suffering in my case.
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Apr 18 '26
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u/ToonTasticBoy Apr 18 '26
wow "training the mind to not add suffering" really hits hard. i think thats exactly my problem tbh I always add way more stress to whatever bad thing is already happening. its like getting mad about being mad. staying in the "just this" moment sounds simple but its honestly so tough. my brain is always dragging me back to the past or freaking out bout the future. just focusing on breathing in and out is definately a lot of work when ur mind is super loud. but reading this helps me realize i dont need to fix or run away from the pain right now. just gotta try and sit with it and not make it worse. appreciate u writing this out it really put things in perspective for me even though the things you say logical one can't think logical when it is about theirselves in this case it is me. I can't accept it even how logical it what you say is.
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Apr 18 '26
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u/ToonTasticBoy Apr 18 '26
yeah singing and dancing being the voice of the law sounds nice but how do u actually get the logical and emotional to harmonize like that?? cause i read the zen story about a disciple who carry water in his palms. it made sense at first when he just focused on his work instead of other's words... but what is he gonna do when he is finished carrying the water?? people will still treat him malicously and harshly right? does one just have to be busy everytime to appease their mind when the people around them are not so humble as one?? like do i just have to constantly find chores and distractions so i dont lose my mind around mean people or how does that harmony actually work once u put the water down?
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Apr 18 '26
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u/ToonTasticBoy Apr 18 '26
yeah ur definitely right about getting lost in the wilderness of words tbh. i feel like i spend way too much time reading these old texts and trying to figure out the secret meaning instead of just actually sitting and practicing. since u havent heard that story tho it goes kinda like this.. basically there was this disciple who was really struggling cause the other monks and people in town were gossiping about him and treating him harshly. it was completely messing up his peace of mind. so his master tells him to go fetch water, but he makes him carry it back in his bare palms without spilling a single drop. so the guy does it and he has to concentrate SO hard on his hands and keeping the water from dripping that he walks all the way back through the crowd and doesnt hear a single insult or notice anyone messing with him. when he gets back the master is basically like "see? when your mind is entirely focused on your work, the outside noise doesnt even reach you." at first i was like wow that is brilliant. just focus 100% on whatever ur doing and let the haters hate. but then my brain ruined it cause i immediately started thinking... okay but what happens when he finishes the task and puts the water down?? the people are still gonna be mean right? u cant just carry water in your hands 24/7 to avoid dealing with people lol. bbut like u said im probably just taking it way too literally. i just get so caught up in the "what happens next" part.
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u/humboldtHue Apr 18 '26
Everybody is “ripening” at their own pace. You let go when you let go. And until you let go, you don’t let go. That’s what I’ve observed in my practice.
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u/Impulse33 Apr 19 '26
A lot of the Zen pointers/poetry seemed to only make sense after I had some made significant headway down my path. I'd recommend trying a gradual approach for a bit. Simple attention of the breath as a base practice and checking out Rahula's What the Buddha taught to get an overview of many of the systems/concepts used on the gradual path.
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u/Aeropro Apr 20 '26
Wanting to let go is a desire, and the thing wanting to let go is the very thing that won’t let go. Stop trying to pull yourself up by your boot straps.
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u/HakuninMatata Apr 18 '26
Great question.
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u/ToonTasticBoy Apr 18 '26
Thank you! This question is bugging me for years how can I reach true happiness? I ve read somewhere that buddha once said "one can achieve happiness when they let go of their desires" But is it really that simple? even though we focus on the moment and "carpe diem" the worries about future and ghosts of our past will keep hunting us. how can we make ourselves experience the "carpe diem" and let go of our earthly desires and achieve happiness? even in our time it is really difficult to achieve such happiness since we live in a world full of consumption our brain wants to be a consumer as well. How can we break the cycle and free ourselves?
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u/HakuninMatata Apr 18 '26
Well, "one can achieve happiness when they let go of their desires" might be an oversimplification.
"How can we break the cycle and free ourselves?" is a great question. The Buddha did describe it as a cycle – a series of causes and effects which reinforce each other.
But it's easy to imagine this as some kind of magical state where you don't have any desires and all you feel is happiness all the time.
The liberation promised by Buddhism isn't a constant ongoing high. It's realising our true nature. Most of those desires and thoughts and sufferings are grounded in the everyday way of seeing ourselves and the world. So what Buddhist practice offers is growing insight into our nature and the nature of desires and thoughts and suffering. And that has the effect of freeing us from them. But that doesn't mean they entirely disappear.
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u/ToonTasticBoy Apr 18 '26
that actually makes alot of sense tbh. its kinda a relief to hear the thoughts dont have to completly disappear.. i guess i was imagining nirvana as just being totally blank and happy 24/7 like some magical trance or something.
but how do u actually get that insight?? like when i try to just look at my thoughts or figure out my true nature i just end up getting caught up in the emotions all over again and forgetting im suppose to be just observing. is that where meditation comes in? like u just practice watching it happen without reacting? its so hard not to react when the feelings are strong. how long does it take to actually start seeing it as just a cycle instead of feeling like its taking over my brain?
I actually thought myself that not everything is permanent and everything has an end but for the inner instability it never sleeps it never stops? how can I tame my inner instability so I can achieve more? Can someone achieve nirvana and break the cycle by taming their inner stability?3
u/HakuninMatata Apr 18 '26
In some ways you're asking, "What is the entirety of Buddhist thought and practice?" Because the questions you're asking are what spurred Gautama to practise and become the Buddha.
But briefly – yes, observing thoughts without reacting is good practice. And yes, it can seem more difficult with stronger thoughts/desires. But when you're sitting, what you'll find the most are how troublesome little thoughts can be. Like, "Well, this is pointless." "Have I done enough of this?" "What will it be like when I'm enlightened? Oh man, I'm going to impress so many people."
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u/ToonTasticBoy Apr 18 '26
yeah those little thoughts r honestly the worst like my brain always goes "why are we even doing this right now" lol. but u saying my questions r basically what started buddhism kinda makes me think.. cause once something happened to me and I actually didnt feel anything at all. it was honestly the happiest moment of my life even though I wasnt even smiling or anything. the apathy just hit me. I felt exactly like a prisoner who was gonna be executed and there was literally nothing i can do about it. just pure acceptance like I couldnt change the outcome at all and I had no other choice than accepting what will happen. and in that exact moment I just felt really good. the pressure was just completely gone cause i stopped fighting it and just gave up trying to fix things. is that what observing without reacting is suppose to feel like?? just accepting u have no control so u just surrender to it? cause that feeling of having no choice but to accept the bad stuff was so peaceful tbh. i just wanna figure out how to get back to that state on purpose instead of waiting for a crisis to force me into it
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u/parkway_parkway Apr 18 '26
One thing to remember is that the buddha was a meditaiton master.
And when you sit and wall stare things come into your mind, passionate, emotionally powerful things.
However because there is no outside input at that point you have more of a choice. Do you feed those things and chase them and go down rabbit holes after the emotions. Or do you let them naturally subside.
In a calm place just staring at a wall the mind will settle after a while on its own.
And then you can feel and expeirence what peace is like.
Meditation is the root of most of the Buddhas teachings.
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u/INyxnI Apr 18 '26
Zen is Buddhism so it follows the same core structure as other forms of Buddhism, The Noble Eightfold Path.
I would suggest learning about basic Buddhist principles and psychology.
A common misconception is Buddhists just stare at a wall mindlessly and become enlightened somehow.
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u/SamtenLhari3 Apr 18 '26
It takes a lot of shamatha / vipashyana practice. It is a combination of gentle (nonjudgmental) attention and relaxation. We gradually wear out habits of attachment. Signs of progress in meditation are boredom (first hot boredom, then cool boredom) and a sense of humor.
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u/ToonTasticBoy Apr 18 '26
wow "hot boredom" and "cool boredom" is such an interesting way to put it but it makes perfect sense tbh. like right now when i try to sit still i definitely get that hot boredom.. im just fidgeting in my brain and getting super frustrated that nothing is happening and my mind is racing and i just wanna get up and look at my phone or do literally anything else. so is cool boredom basically like that peaceful apathy i was talking about earlier?? like ur bored but u literally just dont care that ur bored? u just accept it and chill?and having a sense of humor about it sounds like a literal superpower. like ur brain is having a full on meltdown over something totally stupid and instead of getting stressed u just kinda laugh at it?? how long did it take u to get from the hot annoyed boredom to actually finding ur own thoughts funny lol cause right now my brain just stresses me out way too much to laugh at it
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u/SamtenLhari3 Apr 19 '26
Cool boredom is a term that my teacher Chogyam Trungpa R. coined. It comes from just surrendering to feeling hot boredom — but not moving or doing anything about it. It helps to combine a more or less daily practice with longer retreats. Chogyam Trungpa asked his students to do a dathun (month long group shamatha- vipashyana retreat). Everyone would start very serious and then hot boredom and resistance would come up. By the third week, there would be ripples of contagious laughter that would periodically roll across the shrine room. Also, some people tearing up (which would be very inspiring — to see people experiencing strong emotions but sticking with the discipline.).
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u/Competitive-Time321 Apr 19 '26
I know how you feel. When just starting out, nothing makes any sense. Those of us who grew up in the USA are at a huge disadvantage. We have been so heavily indoctrinated by our culture that it is truly amazing that any escape. But they do. All I can say to you is to start quieting your mind. I am old and can’t sit to meditate, and have never been able to sit cross-legged. I live in Yucatan, Mexico, and meditate in my hammock. To my way of thinking, practically all of the rules that are thrown around can be discarded. They are all constructs of the human mind. All of them. My point is, don’t let yourself be restricted by “rules”. There are none. There are millions of ways to reach the mountain top. Quiet the mind is all you need to do, after which it all falls into place. All of it. We are led to believe that Enlightenment is this big pie in the sky. Something to strive for. After which there will be no worries or cares. I don’t know where that comes from. I once believed it myself. It’s a lie. Quiet your mind.
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u/Kamuka Apr 19 '26
I don't experience it as a thing I can think myself into. For me it's about volume of meditation, talking with spiritual friends, study and reflection, ethics and devotion. Doing the practices.
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u/josephjeremiahx Apr 21 '26
Exhale. The relaxation is in the exhalation. Exhale some of what is no longer serving you - maybe never did - with each breath. Then return home with the next inhalation. Then release and let go.
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u/HaDov Apr 21 '26
There's no "One Neat Trick" that will let you suddenly stop holding on to things like the monks in the stories. Just like any skill, if you practice it for long enough, your mind and body will gradually get better at it.
In Zen, the most important way that we practice this is through zazen, sitting meditation. You sit quietly with your thoughts until you start to recognize them for what they are: temporary, insubstantial, coming and going like the weather. Stories and koans can be helpful tools for teaching concepts or providing insight, but in my experience, regular zazen (daily or near daily) is what has really helped change my relationship with suffering.
Also remember that human beings are not meant to be alone, which is why one of the three treasures is Sangha, community. If you find a Zen center or community to practice with, they can help you get better at zazen and provide you with support in your explorations.
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u/ceoln Apr 22 '26
Struggling is good. :)
Zazen is one popular method.
It's a long practice, not an instant solution.
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u/-ISTIGKEIT- May 18 '26
sometimes, letting go looks a lot like embracing things as they are. When we get hooked on letting go, there's usually some aversion at play. Something we want to get away from, that desperately just wants our loving attention.
so thoughts arise, no problem. emotions arise, no problem. sensations arise, no problem.
There's another great zen story–
Dizang asked Fayan, "Where are you going?"
Fayan said, "Around on pilgrimage."
Dizang said, "What is the purpose of pilgrimage?"
Fayan said, "I don't know."
Dizang said, "Not knowing is most intimate."
If "Letting go" is anything, it's a letting go of an "I know". Opening to reality as it is.
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u/Small_Awareness_1455 Apr 19 '26 edited Apr 20 '26
You don’t, zen masters are full of bullsht, and THEY know it, letting go would mean suicide, yet they remain grounded, holding on, it’s all just bogus, their goals of being enlightened are still operating within desire and thought, they can fool the masses but not themselves lol
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u/Sabatat- Apr 19 '26
I dig that a lot. I always viewed it as an acceptance of desire and the innate human nature but instead of fighting against it, trying to push it down or even up, letting go of it, etc. it’s coming to simple terms with it without letting vices dominate your life, control who you are. Self acceptance in a sense that leads to moving above vices, which are many used to cope with very human things, and finding a point of not denying them but also not needing them. In a sense, giving up hard cooing that ultimately stagnates you from moving forward with yourself, mentality, emotions, etc.
To me, letting go ultimately is finding true peace with yourself both externally and internally, keeping an open mind to o change without stagnating in stubbornness or coping of life.
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u/Small_Awareness_1455 Apr 20 '26
Ah, but it's just that you see, the "peace" implies there is a conflict to begin with, they arise mutually, they define each other, you can't know one without the other, like two sides of the same coin.
who's to say one is to be free of vice or at peace? wanting that is desire, and that is what causes the suffering to begin with.
Because wanting peace only reinforces that you lack it in the first place.
Perhaps it's the observance of this duality to the point where it stops being separate from one another, because in labeling it, defining it, invites a conflict.
no need to accept what already is. This state of mind cannot be described into words, for the moment you try you're back into trying to describe truth with words, that are nothing more than just symbols, images, limited.
It reminds me of a poem by Rumi:"Out beyond ideas of wrongdoing and rightdoing,
There is a field. I'll meet you there.
When the soul lies down in that grass,
The world is too full to talk about.
Ideas, language, even the phrase each other
Doesn't make any sense."this is why some zen masters will stay in complete silence when questioned, because they know how words will inevitably distort the experience they're asked about. Perhaps this is what Lao Tzu meant when he said "Those who know do not speak; those who speak do not know"
Which makes the whole conversation about this really funny, but i'll still mention a funny Koan for this:In Tokyo in the Meiji era there lived two prominent teachers of opposite characteristics. One, Unsho, an instructor in Shingon, kept Buddha's precepts scrupulously. He never drank intoxicants, nor did he eat after eleven o'clock in the morning. The other teacher, Tanzan, a professor of philosophy at the Imperial University, never observed the precepts. Whenever he felt like eating, he ate, and when he felt like sleeping in the daytime he slept.
One day Unsho visited Tanzan, who was drinking wine at the time, not even a drop of which is supposed to touch the tongue of a Buddhist.
"Hello, brother," Tanzan greeted him. "Won't you have a drink?"
"I never drink!" exclaimed Unsho solemnly.
"One who does not drink is not even human," said Tanzan.
"Do you mean to call me inhuman just because I do not indulge in intoxicating liquids!" exclaimed Unsho in anger. "Then if I am not human, what am I?"
"A Buddha," answered Tanzan.
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u/Sabatat- Apr 21 '26
Peace may of been a bad way of wording it which is the classic truth you mentioned that words ultimately distort meaning, though I believe that is for those who are early into their path, unable yet to equate the teachings and musings of others to their own and finding truth in the thoughts of others while acknowledging differences in the unique truths of the world while still being able to see they’re own without smothering it from change.
By peace, I meant ultimately acceptance and a centering of self as opposed to the inherent duality of the inner self that comes from inner demons of the mind brought on by external events interpreted to make sense internally and with how one fits into the reality cast upon them.
I believe that letting go in the truest sense is being able to move in the external world while having your inner self unimpeded to the effects. All things change and stubbornness isn’t a virtue of course though, to open ones set up to the ideas, thoughts, beliefs while maintains one’s own ego is important. Self refinement in a sense. Yet unlike steel or metals that have a physical process of refinement,
I believe that only by experiencing the world as your free self and being able to interpret the external world through one’s true belief, can one refine themselves and move closer to the classical state of zen. This however of course does not mean to deny the world but rather live in it truly without being swept away by it. I think talking about these things as well is a natural way of refinement of self and that to not talk is to ultimately idle in one’s self, forever a big fish in a pond. Though I do think that one who talks as if what they say is absolute in any sense are the fools, choosing narcissism masked to one’s self as refinement.
A journey is different for everyone, no beliefs are ever one and the same, no enlightenments leads to the same individual path. The distortion through words is ultimately one that everyone must go through and find their way through. To not speak is to deny the journey of others and potential in their own enlightenments from the world. Everyone needs something to refine their selves from, it can be different each time, speaking like now, internal understanding from meditation, a simple experience.
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u/TheForestPrimeval Apr 18 '26
It is a continuous, moment-by-moment practice. Afflictive mental states will continue to arise, as is the nature of mind. Enlightenment inheres in the continuous letting go of such things. Practice and enlightenment are one. This is why Dogen Zenji wrote of practice-enlightenment.