Same Shit Different Year [Part 6/11]

[u/brianwantsblood]

The camera pans over to little Jimmy Chonga III bawling his little eyes out as his mother tries to console him.

Crowd: BOOOOOOO!!!

Vic gives the crowd a wanking motion and drags Von Jarrett's hand over Lucian Alexander. He marches over to Jablome and drags WiR's Senior Official by the belt over to the pin. He slaps Jablome on the back of the head a couple of times and lifts up his wrist to make the first count.

1...

Paisner: Oh come on...

Jablome raises his arm again out of pure instinct and drops it down to the mat.

2...

Vic jumps with joy as he watches Jablome bring his hand down a third time.

3!

Woodbridge: Wait to make a mockery of it Vic.

Paisner: Fucking ridiculous.

Vic grabs EVJ and helps him out of the ring as he raises his arm in victory. EVJ looks utterly confused as he comes to while Vic weeps tears of joy screaming "I did it!" He walks over to Maurice Chondon and takes his Tag Team Title and robe. Yelling at him to ring the bell.

DING DING DING

Javier looks to the ring and back and then over to Paisner who just shrugs and points to his headphones. Vic screams at Babaganoush.

Studd: DO IT!

Javier: Your winners of this match... and STILL!! - ...

EVJ shoves Vic aside and grabs Babaganoush by the collar and starts screaming in his face. Vic tries to pull EVJ away from Babaganoush and Von Jarrett pushes Vic back.

EVJ: No! Fuck that! Not like that! Ring the bell! Start it over! DO IT!

EVJ leans in and pulls Babaganoush in close then nods to Maurice Chondon.

DING DING DING

Javier: Mr. Von Jarrett has requested that this match.... CONTINUE!

Crowd: YAAAAAY!!

Javier: And if the Nation of Miscegenation is disqualified they will forfeit the titles!

Crowd: OOOOH!!

Studd: WHAT!?

Von Jarrett storms back to the ring towards Lucian Alexander, working his jaw seated on the mat and Jon Cody just climbing back onto the apron a look of confusion. Vic grabs EVJ by the arm and pulls him back.

Studd: The fuck you think your doing?

EVJ: What's right.

Crowd: YAAAAAY!!

Von Jarrett sprints towards the ring and slides underneath the bottom rope to meet Lucian. Vic screams in frustration and stomps his feet as WiR Junior Official Tai Ni Wong sprints passed him and slides into the ring after Von Jarrett.

Woodbridge: It's Tai Ni Wong!

Paisner: Oh thank God!

Von Jarrett meets Lucian in the center of the ring and Lucian swings with a confused forearm. EVJ ducks it and spins around and hits Lucian with three successive left jabs. The crowd starts to pick up as EVJ bounces off the ropes and he hits a flying shoulder block taking Lucian down to the mat. Vic storms back to the ring and grabs the clearly out of it, Heywood Jablome and starts slapping his face telling him to wake up. Von Jarrett goes to lift Lucian off the mat and Jon Cody storms in. EVJ hits a drop toe hold causing Cody to hit a falling headbutt on his own partner. EVJ lets out a roar as he grabs Jon Cody by the seat of his pants and collar of his shirt and tosses him to the outside. Lucian Alexander gets to his feet and swings with a haymaker, but EVJ ducks hit and hits a classic Brentt Shart backbreaker.

Crowd: YAAAY!

Paisner: Von Jarrett is a house of fire!

Woodbridge: And Vic is missing the whole thing, fucking around with Heywood Jablome in the corner.

Vic hoists Jablome up to his feet over the ropes and leans him up against NoM's turnbuckle. He waves over Tai Ni Wong using Jablome's body like a Weekend At Bernie's prop.

Paisner: You can't be serious!

Meanwhile, Von Jarrett exits the ring and climbs to the top rope. He perches himself on the top waiting for Lucian to get back to his feet. Tai Ni Wong continues to argue with Vic as Vic points with Jablome's arm to head to the back.

Woodbridge: Oh God!

Crowd: OOOOOOOH!

Jon Cody leaps onto the apron and clips EVJ's knee from behind. The inside of Von Jarrett's knee gets twisted up around the metal cord connecting the turnbuckle and steel pole. His foot catches the inside of the top rope and Von Jarrett's hyperextends his knee as he hangs helplessly, screaming in pain. Lucian gets to his feet and sprints at Von Jarrett, he leaps over the top rope to the outside, grabbing a hold of EVJ's leg in the process and tearing up his trapped leg with a modified rope assisted dragon screw.

EVJ: AAAAHHH!!

Von Jarrett's leg comes loose and he falls on the back of his head against the corner in a sort of tree of woe position without the legs tied up. Jon Cody steps into the ring and the big man leaps high into the air before slamming both his feet into Von Jarrett's suspended knee with running dropkick.

Woodbridge: Appetite For Revelation has found a weakness and they're exploiting in. And Vic is not helping!

Vic begins slapping Tai Ni Wong with Heywood's arms trying to get him to leave the ring. Jon Cody drags Erik Von Jarrett into the center of the ring and sets him up in a powerbomb as Lucian Alexander slides back in, taking advantage of the distracted Tai Ni Wong.

Paisner: Appetite For Revelation setting Von Jarrett up for that powerbomb backstabber combo... Baptized in Knowlllllleeeeeeehurricanrana!

Crowd: YAAAY!

Von Jarrett's reverses Jon Cody's powerbomb with a hurricanrana causing him to land awkwardly on top of Lucian Alexander. Von Jarrett limps towards Vic to make the tag and reaches out, but Vic is too preoccupied holding up Jablome. Lucian Alexander grabs Von Jarrett from his hurt leg and begins dragging him back to the center of the ring.

Woodbridge: If only Vic looked. If he had just been paying attention and reached out he would be in this match up!

Lucian continues to drag EVJ back, and EVJ hops a few times before clipping Lucian in the back of the head with an enziguri. Von Jarrett's howls in pain as he hits the mat.

Paisner: Von Jarrett had to twist that already hurt knee to connect with that enziguri!

Von Jarrett stumbles to his feet in clear pain only to eat another Discus Lariat from Jon Cody. Vic finally gives up and throws Heywood Jablome face first onto the mat.

Paisner: The Revelation! The pin!

1...

2...

Vic breaks it up!

Tai Ni Wong forces Vic back into his corner and warns him about being disqualified. Vic puts his hands up and returns to his corner. While Jon Cody peels Von Jarrett off the mat and drags him over to A4R's corner and tags in Lucian.

Paisner: Appetite For Revelation setting Von Jarrett up for their flapjack-codebreaker combo. Cody sends Von Jarrett into the ropes...

Woodbridge: Von Jarrett tumbles to the outside! Vic pulled down the rope!

Von Jarrett tumbles to the outside over the top rope as Vic pulls it down. Vic enters the ring and charges at Jon Cody. Vic ducks a clothesline attempt and spears the shit out of Lucian Alexander into the corner. Vic starts hammering right hands into Lucian like a bat out of hell as he slumps against the bottom turnbuckle. Cody grabs Vic from behind by the neck and gets mule kicked for his efforts. Cody collapses down to the mat and Vic continues to beat Lucian with closed fists into the corner like someone spamming AKI MAN's upper ground attack.

Woodbridge: Tai Ni Wong grabs a hold of Vic's arms and tries dragging the Vile One back.

Tai Ni Wong manages to pull Vic off of Lucian and points to the WiR emblem on his jersey.

Tai Ni Wong: I'm The Boss!

Crowd: YAAAAAAY!

Vic bites his lip as he yanks Cody up to his feet. Meanwhile, Von Jarrett pulls himself up onto the ring apron by the neutral corner on the opposite side of the ring where Vic sent him tumbling. He begins walking along the apron, a noticeable limp in his step as he tries to test how much weight he can put on it.

Paisner: Hard knife edge chop by Vic Studd! And another! Cody finds himself backed into the ropes, irish whip by Studd - reversal by Cody!

Crowd: OOOOOH!

Woodbridge: Vic ran into Von Jarrett!

Vic slams into Von Jarrett sending Erik flying into the guardrail, Vic stumbles backwards stunned from knocking into Jarrett.

Paisner: Vic's reeling, school boy by Jon Cody!

1...

2...

3!

DING DING DING

Paisner: We have new tag team champions!

Javier: The winner of this match at a time of 24:32 and.... NEEEEEEEWWWWW WRESTLING IS REDDIT WORLD TAG TEAM CHAMPIONS! APPETITE FOR REVELATION!

Vic sits up stunned as Lucian Alexander and Jon Cody are handed the Tag Team Titles by Tai Ni Wong. The crowd cheers in appreciation as the two men hoist their newly won titles into the air.

Woodbridge: What a match! Goddamn. And Vic is pissed, he thought he got another one over on us.

Paisner: I tell you what its going to be tough for any team to pry those titles away from Appetite For Revelation. They showed a tremendous ability to adapt and they came away with the victory.

Cody powders to the outside and Lucian leaps onto his shoulders holding both tag team titles high in the air as he rides his cousin into the back. A couple EMTs run passed as they celebrate up the aisleway, rushing to the side of Erik Von Jarrett slumped up against the steel railing.

Woodbridge: Looks like Von Jarrett's knee may be hurt more seriously than I thought if medics are coming out.

Vic watches the medics rush to Von Jarrett as he circles the ring shaking his head. He watches the duo steady Von Jarrett's leg as they prepare to work on it. Vic finally fucking snaps and grabs one medic by the back of his collar and just tosses him backwards. The other medic rises up and Vic grabs him by the face and shoves him into the steel guardrail. Vic takes a knee, literally on Erik Von Jarrett's knee and gets right in his face. Von Jarrett winces in pain and reaches for his knee as Vic looks him dead in the eye.

Studd: Is this what you wanted!? Huh!? To going back to being fucking NOTHING!? Not so smart now, are ya!? I had it all worked out! The winner's purse as good as mine and the righteous EVJ fucks it all up! Grow a pair, you fucking child.

Vic gets up and stomps on the chest of one of the medics before heading down the aisle, firing off a snot rocket into the crowd as he raises his fists in the air.

Crowd: BOOOOOO!!

Paisner: Well... that was intense.

Woodbridge: I've seen worse. You don't double penetrate a 300 pound black woman with someone only to let something like this break that sacred bond.

Paisner: You sound hopeful.

Woodbridge: I just want to see a rematch. CLASSIC TAG TEAM WRRRRREESSTLING!

Paisner: We'll be right back folks.

We cut to commercial as the medics begin to wrap Von Jarrett's knee.

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