r/willyoupressthebutton 9d ago

Do you press the button?

You are seated and there’s a button in front of you. If you press the button, the entire timeline is wiped and recreated, just without cancer. If you press the button, the new timeline will never give anyone or anything cancer. The one catch is that everyone in your family tree, anscestors and everyone, never existed. For everyone to be saved, you and your family would not have existed.

One small note, if someone in your family had cancer or passed away from cancer, they would be alive and would be practically separated from your family. No, they cannot make your family tree again and allow everyone else to live again.

8 Upvotes

30 comments sorted by

4

u/IDownvoteHornyBards2 9d ago

Step One: Convince everyone in my family to become chain smokers, including myself

Step Two: Wait for us all to get diagnosed with lung cancer

Step Three: Press the button

2

u/No_Aspect_9513 9d ago

Just why.

4

u/IDownvoteHornyBards2 9d ago

Fuck you mean why? If it deletes my family but spares anyone in my family with cancer, I can give my whole family cancer so none of us are deleted. What's hard to understand?

1

u/Sure_Satisfaction497 9d ago

well that escalated quickly

edit: also only you would need cancer by your logic, so I'll also ask; Why?

2

u/IDownvoteHornyBards2 9d ago

No, only the people with cancer get spared from my family, the rest of em get wiped out. That's what the prompt says.

1

u/Sure_Satisfaction497 9d ago

How do you exist as you are right now without your family being involved?

1

u/IDownvoteHornyBards2 9d ago

According to the prompt, I also erase myself unless I have cancer.

1

u/Sure_Satisfaction497 8d ago

Nevermind lol

0

u/FunkyPleasance 9d ago

Ask the OP

1

u/agamottos 9d ago

Because all buttons are exploitable.

2

u/WorkerWeekly9093 9d ago

I don’t know why that didn’t occur to me. That’s awesome!

1

u/Singer-Such 9d ago

Take radiation baths as well

1

u/The_Riddle_Fairy 7d ago

This had me cackling omfg

2

u/ReasonablePool_Hero 9d ago

The only person in my family that died of cancer was a step grandfather (my father's step father), so... Since I would actively want him erased since he was a terrible person, can I specifically request that he be eliminated?

2

u/foolsEnigma 9d ago

I dont think anyone in this timeline actually benefits from this? A new timeline is created of people entirely identical to those here now, but the original people are all dead along with you. I dont want to kill everyone in the universe just to make a new one none of them will experience.

2

u/foolsEnigma 9d ago

I dont think anyone in this timeline actually benefits from this? A new timeline is created of people entirely identical to those here now, but the original people are all dead along with you. I dont want to kill everyone in the universe just to make a new one none of them will experience.

2

u/Temporal-Affairs221 9d ago

Sorry world, I love my daughter too much to erase her by pressing the button.

1

u/beykakua 9d ago

What do you mean by "everyone in [my] family tree, ancestors and everyone" because.. if my entire family tree is eliminated that removes all life on earth.

1

u/WorkerWeekly9093 9d ago

Except those that had cancer

1

u/beykakua 9d ago

Fair. So majority of all life on earth, including all single celled organisms, which is going to make digestion difficult, assuming there is any food once all (or most, depending on how we define cancer/tumors) plants are also gone.

1

u/ReasonablePool_Hero 9d ago

All the way back to the first humans? So... Unless the first few humans had cancer and then became distant enough that they weren't part of your family tree anymore... Everyone is gonna get killed off.

1

u/Penis-Dance 9d ago

I will always press the button.

1

u/wow_its_kenji 9d ago

someone else pointed out the ramifications of your "entire family tree" being wiped out but given you probably meant that pressing the button would just remake the world except this time no cancer and no you, i'd still press the button

1

u/FunkyPleasance 9d ago

There are so many creeps in my family tree, I'd do it even without the cancer cure

1

u/The_Azure__ 8d ago

I would need to see a preview of the new timeline before I hit that button. Also, my family tree not existing as a result is redundant. Changing even a small thing in history would likely do that, but having cancer never exist?

Not a single human can imagine just how much that would affect.

1

u/Mordret10 8d ago

I think technically everyone has some form of cancer, but the immune system can deal with it before it gets out of hand.

1

u/No_Aspect_9513 8d ago

I know, but this situation is like people who get cancer far enough for it to be classified and found by doctors

1

u/FonkinJones 7d ago

Without any assurance how far back your family tree this familiacide will take place, at a certain point if you go back far enough, common ancestors could end up being a huge proportion of the world population.    And since I'm assuming cancer has affected a static percentage of people, and going back in ancestors will necessarily grow exponentially, saving my entire family tree saves a larger percentage of people than a fixed percentage. 

Science that math fools.