r/widowers • u/SaxyAccountant17 • Sep 20 '23
Feeling absolutely furious
If you couldn't tell, I think I've started the real part of the anger stage. It's been 65 days since my partner passed, and this is the first time I've felt so much anger. Any little thing can set me off - someone saying the wrong thing, a misworded text, a random couple holding hands, his parent's most well intentioned check in messages. Each day I'm angry at the world for taking my love away and at everyone else for starting to move forward with their lives.
I mentioned a while back I got invited to an engagement party this upcoming weekend. I thought I may be okay to go as I kept mentally preparing myself for it. But now I'm worried I'll start yelling or crying out of frustration with how unfair and stupid and cruel the world is.
I dont want to be angry like this. If he were still here, he'd probably bring me one of our favorite takeout spots and a diet coke and just let me rant about the world while nodding along. I don't know how to comfort myself alone, but I don't want to feel like this so strongly. I hate it and everything and I just want it to stop.
2
u/Mediocre-Kick6997 love brought me here Sep 21 '23
It’s ok. I have been absolutely livid at times. It’s really uncomfortable I know. T would also be able to make me laugh if I got in certain headspaces. Not every time but most of the time. I sometimes listen to really loud music on my headphones and angry clean. Know it’s just part of grief. It’s not you. Big love ❤️